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Monday, September 16, 2019

Rawk's Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice Experience

By RAWKHAWK2010 - Enjoy my hawk swan song.

decided early on in the year that this would be my final article on KoopaTV. I've also chosen to compile this days before Tokyo Game Show 2019 so that it can be published following one of two scenarios: One being the announcement of a new Ace Attorney in which case hey, perfect timing! The other (aka the one which will actually happen) being a Capcom TGS showing that was even more missable than their last, where thereafter I will resign to the fact that the next non-port Ace Attorney will release long after we're all dead. And what's that you say? That I might should stick around at least until after it's confirmed Phoenix Wright won't round off the five Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Challenger Pack fighters? Well, I don't think that'll be happening. Even when we start getting into the additional (presumably still third-party) DLC fighters who weren't originally promised, it's being made clearer by the day that one's importance to Nintendo's history really, really doesn't matter. If you're more likely to get onto Ultimate's roster just by being an ambassador for a company who had their own console, despite the fact that your name is "Terry Bogard" which the vast majority of Nintendo fans had never heard uttered in their lives, then Ys's Adol Christin (who would represent one of the oldest Action JRPG developers/publishers still in existence today) may have less obstacles to overcome than I originally thought. (Hell, after the last Direct I'll be surprised if Phoenix makes it into Ultimate before Deadly Premonition's Agent Francis York Morgan. And it says a lot when I'm only slightly kidding.)

I suppose Capcom could be planning an anime adaptation of the second trilogy to precede a second port collection, but for all we know they've scheduled it with Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney's seven-year timeskip in mind so that in-universe game and real-world anime dates can once again approximately overlap. Well I'm not waiting for that shit!

As for why I'd choose this to be my parting article as opposed to something else, it's simultaneously the conclusion and crescendo of my Ace Attorney Experience, spanning across 200 Miiverse posts (while the first three entries included 38, 32, and 87 respectively), meaning there's pretty much a nonexistent chance that anything both this ambitious and relevant to the site's interests would ever be published by me again. As a bonus, I'm also uploading my Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Experience -- technically both my first and last time documenting an Ace Attorney game on Miiverse, due to me starting and abandoning the game earlier in the decade and then later salvaging my playthrough following 2017's mainline marathon. (I was probably motivated both by the fact that I actually cared about Maya Fey unlike before and because Miiverse was set to go offline in a little over a month.) Think of it as both a prelude and a postscript.

Now then...let the finale commence.

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney Spirit of Justice title screen
Ed: There's obviously spoilers for both Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney − Spirit of Justice and Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney ahead. You've been warned.
Click here to jump to the
Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney bonus section.

Friday, September 13, 2019

September 12 2019 Democrat Presidential Primary Debate 3 ANALYSIS!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Her presence is missed...

Last night from 8 PM Eastern to almost 11 PM, ten Democrat candidates for President of the United States debated their positions on ABC (with some idiot from Univision thrown in for bad measure), vying to be the last person standing to get the opportunity to take down incumbent President Donald John Trump. The Democratic National Committee imposed arbitrary rules (that everyone DID agree to beforehand, though) that ended up excluding the best candidate that Democrats have to offer. (And that hyperlink is meant to point to the second paragraph that is about Tulsi Gabbard, not the rest of the article about John Delaney.) She's still running, so we might see her in the October debate.

But for now, we saw (in order of their stage podiums) Amy Klobuchar, Cory Booker, Pete Buttigieg, Bernie Sanders, Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, Andrew Yang, Beto O'Rourke, and Julián Castro. I'm choosing not to give a section to each candidate this time like in the second debate (part one and part two) or the first debate (part one and part two). (You can see the whole index of who these people are over here.)

You can watch the entire debate for yourself here (ABC won't let me embed it to this article page) but I don't recommend that, out of respect for your time and sanity.

Speaking of time, here were the talking times for all the candidates as compiled by NPR:

No one is surprised that Andrew Yang got the least speaking time for the third debate in a row, right?

Thursday, September 12, 2019

Ring Fit Adventure Is Conceptually BRILLIANT—Hope It Doesn't Screw Up...

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Vintage Nintendo creativity.

I am pretty proud to be a Nintendo fan right now. After last week's Nintendo Direct that I found quite despairing—with great fear that everything Nintendo puts out will just be overshadowed by Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (even if it doesn't deserve that)—I wasn't anticipating today's announcement to be anything more than a filler article. You know, the one teased last week about the Hoop peripheral with people moving ridiculously on a global scale.

Then you look at the thumbnail for today's announcement, and there's really nothing encouraging about...this:

But then you watch it, and you ignore the creepy presenters, and just focus on the game and the ideas presented in there, and if you're like me, you'll quickly come to the conclusion that Nintendo is onto something brilliant and their teaser was just doing a tremendous disservice. (Actually, if you rewatch the trailer from last week given what we know now, some of that STILL don't make sense. It never will.)

The hoop and the leg strap are called the Ring-Con and Leg Strap accessories, and you insert your Joy-Con in them to control your character in Ring Fit Adventure, a new adventure game (of the RPG variety, not of the visual novel variety—though some confuse the two) releasing to the Nintendo Switch on October 18.

Wednesday, September 11, 2019

Pokémon Sword/Shield: Ghost Tea and Non-Miltank Sausage Rice

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - #NeverForget the Vegetarian option.

During last week's Nintendo Direct, there was a section dedicated to Pokémon Sword and Pokémon Shield, which makes sense, since they promised news on those games for that Direct prior to it happening. Here's the trailer they showed, featuring some upbeat music:

The total news release included many tidbits of information, including “Surprise Trading”, Pokémon camping, Alcremie whipped cream flavours, custom business cards called League Cards, two new Pokémon, and shelling out in-game cash for even more trainer customisation than previous generations, including the ability to see what haircuts will look like before getting them.

I'll write about two of these topics, because they're the two that I can make topical tangents to:

Tuesday, September 10, 2019

Pocket Card Jockey Staff Credits

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - No one else is doing it...

Once upon a time, GAME FREAK released a quirky, small game (and a free demo that's still available and transfers your progress to the full game) on the Nintendo 3DS eShop called Pocket Card Jockey. Quite frankly, KoopaTV has been the best place to get information on Pocket Card Jockey because it's just been ignored in most other places. See KoopaTV's article on Pocket Card Jockey's game mechanics here and an article on Pocket Card Jockey's time-attack records here.

As for those other places, even something as basic as the Pocket Card Jockey staff credits is... currently not posted anywhere on the Internet. It's not on Giant Bomb. It's not on the Internet Gaming Database. It's not on Metacritic/GameFAQs. MobyGames doesn't have the credits either. Those sites (besides MobyGames) all have designated pages on their sites for where the credits would go... but those pages have no content on them. (Metacritic and Giant Bomb do still have advertisements, however.)

There's a current controversy going on now with GAME FREAK and how they staff their projects, with some misguided armchair game producers believing that GAME FREAK is somehow prioritising (from a resource standpoint) the team that works on non-Pokémon projects over the Pokémon team. That's just wrong, but since no one's posted the credits for games that team has made, like Pocket Card Jockey, no one really knows what's right. Just look at the dislike bar on Little Town Hero's September Nintendo Direct trailer. (And all the negative comments due to Pokémon fans.)

KoopaTV is going to change that. Here are the full credits to Pocket Card Jockey:

Monday, September 9, 2019

Sign-up for the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open September 2019!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Now featuring Québec.

In a very surprise announcement—even to me, and I'm an insider—Nintendo and Battlefy are teaming up once again, this time with the esteemed The Big House super major based in Michigan. The four top placers in the newly-announced Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open September 2019—taking place September 21—will get free tickets to Detroit to participate in the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate singles bracket at The Big House 9—taking place the weekend of October 4.

You can register for the event here.

KoopaTV readers know that less than a month ago, I wrote about the August version of the Battlefy-Nintendo tournament series (featuring many useful tips and information that is still applicable and relevant), which featured the prize of going to the October Nintendo Live tournament in Japan. What's different about the tournament this time?
  1. Nintendo's lawyers finally are allowing players in Québec to participate (as part of Region 7)
    1. Puerto Rico and other US territories still excluded
  2. The prize for going to Detroit is valued much less than going to Kyoto. Plane tickets are cheaper and the lodging is for less days, but more importantly, you only win a $350 Visa gift card and not a $450 gift card
  3. There is no Grand Finals round this time to determine the order of the top 4; all 4 top-placers are going to Detroit
  4. Battlefy as a platform is substantially more stable and robust with its server redundancy than in August, though note that's not the same as the stability of your own personal Internet connection (or your would-be opponents’)
How should you practice for the tournament? I wrote an article compiling all of the fighter usage stats from the August tournament here, and that article has a spreadsheet breaking down fighter usage stats per your specific region—and yes, there are substantial regional differences besides Joker being #1 everywhere. Since it's the same player base, you should expect very similar usage. One note: given recent events, you should anticipate adding Banjo and Mii Gunner to the list of most-used characters (Joker, Hero, Link) and train in those match-ups.

You should also try practicing playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for four hours in a row, because unless you get a very good win record early on (such as winning your first eleven games), you're going to have to play the ladder round the whole time to get a chance of getting into your region's top 32. Specific tips on doing that are back in that August article.

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open September 2019 character mural
At least it's generic Mii Gunner in the mural and not... him...

Ludwig, of course, will be participating once again, as the member of the media in residence for this series of tournaments. He wants to gain confidence in winning with his other characters that aren't his father, since for someone who mains four characters, he relied mostly on Lord Bowser for his matches. Ludwig is glad he wrote the August article so comprehensively, because it means this article is pretty easy to write.

Friday, September 6, 2019

Nintendo Teases a Hoop-esque “new experience for Nintendo Switch”

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I guess we'll find out whether it's something to be afraid of in a week.

I might still be obligated to talk about information from that Nintendo Direct earlier this week, but I'd actually like to move on from that for now. (I'm still in a bad mood.)

As a jerk has repeated many, many times, “let it go, and move on.” 

Nintendo already wants to move on... to as far as next week. In what is unprecedented, at least in my memory, they made a teaser video to tease an announcement of a new product anouncement... WITHOUT giving it a name or describing what it is. Nintendo usually is quick to announce what something is, instead of teasing a mystery ahead of time with a whole video. The closest thing that I can think of is them announcing Metroid Prime 4 with only a 4 in artwork, but even there, they announced (and then indefinitely delayed) that it's Metroid Prime 4. That's all Nintendo fans needed to know, and that's way more information than what we got for...this...thing.

Take a watch, if you dare:

I don't know what Nintendo wants me to feel from this announcement besides “cringe,” and that's the wrong direction my feelings are supposed to go in per the “let's move on from the bad-mood Direct” thought. The video made me feel stupid because I didn't realise they were talking in non-English languages for a while, and I thought I just had bad listening comprehension.

The product itself is two sizes of bendy exercise hoops that you insert Joy-Cons into—a wise decision, as opposed to the Nintendo Labo that is invalidated by the Nintendo Switch Lite's smaller size but still requires a Nintendo Switch inserted into it. I figure it's some kind of Joy-Con peripheral. (Note the distinction there: the Nintendo Switch Lite is compatible with Joy-Con, which are the same size regardless of what your Switch model is.)

None of the people in the video were actually playing with one another, indicating a single-player experience. It was one person with the strange hoop, and a bunch of other people in the background babbling their respective languages in weird poses with fake excitement, much akin to this. One guy yelled about doing a backflip, which could range from an exercise game to a 3D The Legend of Zelda game where you hold down on your control stick and press the A button while also pressing the Z-target button.

Nintendo Switch exercise hoop Rome guy on floor Joy-Cons
When in Rome, don't do what the Romans do.
...Or you'll end up on the floor with some kind of torture device fastened on you.

The video spans Paris, Madrid, Rome, San Francisco, Kyoto, and Dallas. I'm not sure what the purpose of that is other than to demonstrate (brag?) that Nintendo is in a lot of places around the world... at least, Europe, the United States, and Japan. Guess that means this thing will be sold worldwide.

Maybe I'm being too polite or indirect here. I haven't denounced the video in outraged terminology. ...I already let all of that out on Wednesday, though. And some of Thursday. I just can't be shocked or disappointed anymore. For now, I have no reason to be.

Not until next week when we figure out what this torture hoop is. I'll be judging it along the lines of, “Will it be as evil as the Nintendo Labo?” How about you? What are you expecting out of this thing?

Ludwig didn't know how to write the title of the article so it'd appear in search engines, because he has no idea what people would search for with a product with no name. Nintendo's video only has the keywords, “nintendo, video game, nintendo switch” which isn't helpful.

The new experience is called Ring Fit Adventure, and the teaser about it did a tremendous disservice to how great the concept is.

Thursday, September 5, 2019

Diminishing Marginal Returns of Super Smash Bros. DLC

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I have an unpopular position here, but it's the right one.

Out of all the news that came from yesterday's Nintendo Direct, what's gotten everyone's attention? The Super Smash Bros. Ultimate stuff. Terry Bogard as the fourth Challenger Pack. Banjo & Kazooie released. Sans (uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh) as a Mii Costume, along with wonderful Team Rocket Grunts, and returning Super Smash Bros. 4 costumes Zero and Proto Man. (And there's Goemon but no one cares.) But possibly the most enduring news is that there's more fighter DLC to come after the five from the Fighters Pass, and they're sold separately from that Fighters Pass. How many characters? Unspecified, but enough to make it plural. Will there be more stages and music with it? Unknown.

Masahiro Sakurai said...
 “Finally, it was announced that we will be working on even more DLC fighters. To me, it feels like the finish line is sliding farther away. You may wonder, ‘How much longer can he be involved in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate?’ But I'm also excited. Adding more characters to the game means that more game worlds will be added to the series, and ultimately that means there will be an even greater opportunity to delight the fans. At the same time, I feel that Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is now representing so many characters and game worlds, that it's become an enormous game. Even if the Super Smash Bros. series continues moving forward, I doubt there will be an opportunity to bring this many characters together again. And so, I want to keep improving on this record as much as possible, and I will continue to work hard at developing the game. I appreciate your support.”
Super Smash Bros. Ultimate even more additional DLC fighters wave 2 newcomer letter envelope
“Even More DLC Fighters will Join the Battle!”
(There doesn't seem to be a grammatical style where “will” isn't supposed to be capitalised.)

According to polls among the users of the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate board on GameFAQs, the community and fanbase is largely psyched about this additional wave of fighters. 

I'm not. I'm really, really not. I'm not just fatigued by Super Smash Bros. constantly being the day's biggest news story whenever there's a Nintendo Direct (seriously, there was other stuff in that Direct, though I must admit nothing in particular from that resonated with me), but I think this has a net-negative effect on the whole Switch ecosystem. And the game itself.

Wednesday, September 4, 2019

KoopaTV's September 4, 2019 Nintendo Direct LIVE REACTIONS!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Poor soul.

Apparently unlike the rest of the world, I didn't like today's Nintendo Direct. And that's not contrarian nonsense. You can see my reactions to everything, as it happens, in the reaction log below.

They promised to show lots of Nintendo Switch games, including Pokémon Sword, Pokémon Shield, and Luigi's Mansion 3. ...Those games ended up being pretty unimportant, though.

Here's the video on demand that I'll probably need to replace soon because it's the live stream:

I'm all alone because I'm more of a poor soul than anyone from Banjo-Kazooie.

Tuesday, September 3, 2019

FINAL FANTASY VIII Released and Deemed Remastered... But Why?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Trying to get attention and it's not working?

Today, Square Enix released the once-thought unportable FINAL FANTASY VIII, as promised from their E3 2019 conference. It's $20 on PC, Switch, Xbox One, and PlayStation 4.

It's sold as FINAL FANTASY VIII Remastered.

There are no press releases for the game. Only Square Enix (instead of the console manufacturers joining in the fanfare) released a half-minute trailer on the FINAL FANTASY YouTube channel:

You'll notice this trailer doesn't focus on any actual gameplay. Just quick cutscene shots and close-ups of character renders. That's because the only thing that got “remastered” were those character renders. Everything else, like the backgrounds and textures and music, were kept the same as they were in 1999, which subjectively makes everything look more ugly because of how contrasting the HD models against the muddy backgrounds are. (I personally like it for gameplay reasons since it distinguishes things like up-resolutioned treasure chests.) This is very similar to the Final Fantasy VII and Final Fantasy IX ports earlier this year, but those didn't go around with “Remastered” in the title. 

Actually, for some reason, the game has two title screens:

Monday, September 2, 2019

KoopaTV's August 2019 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - “Back to school” shouldn't affect anyone, right?

Personally, I'd rather be in school than using my time writing this newsletter. ...Only if the school in question is Garreg Mach Monastery. I've spent my weekend starting and playing a lot of Fire Emblem: Three Houses. You might've spent your weekend agonising going to a real (non-videogame) school or college.

But if you spent your weekend reading KoopaTV articles or something, hey, that's the best way to spend your free time. (Writing them is several hundred times more difficult than reading them, believe me.) And if you're now going to school, let that not impact your KoopaTV consumption. (We have an article on time management as it relates to that.)

Regardless of your consumption and/or schooling habits, this newsletter has a bunch of NEW information to share. But let's start with the look-back:

KoopaTV's Top Four Experiences of August 2019

...Hm, something about the number here doesn't look consistent. Well, if you noticed that, keep reading to a later section. Anyway, here are the top four most recommended experiences from KoopaTV, presented in chronological order:
  1. Reggie Fils-Aime Gets POLITICAL About GUNS and GAMES! — With increased media coverage of gun violence, and some political leaders tying videogames into it, former Nintendo president Reggie Fils-Aime tweets about the ill-informed. ...Reggie himself, however, is ill-informed.
  2. Cadence of Hyrule Free Demo Available! Impressions Inside... — Ludwig writes fairly comprehensive impressions on the free Cadence of Hyrule: Crypt of the NecroDancer Featuring The Legend of Zelda demo on the Nintendo eShop. He insists the key to enjoying it is the fixed-beat mode.
  3. Tips, Tricks, and Insider Information to the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open August 2019 — Ludwig explains the latest Nintendo-sponsored official tournament for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, though the tournament already happened by now. It was a good article for its time!
  4. Class President Bowser Versus Recess — Bowser is running for class president on a CANCEL RECESS platform, and Ludwig explains why this is beneficial for him and others. 

All of KoopaTV's content is worth experiencing, even if it's not on this list—and you'll never know if an article will get prominently referenced later on in a future work. Case in point:

Friday, August 30, 2019

For Your Information: John Delaney Isn't Actually Moderate

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Look at his voting record and positions.

I think this is the last time I'll be able to write about former Maryland Congressman and 2020 Democrat presidential candidate John Delaney. He didn't qualify for September's debate. He doesn't have a chance to qualify for October's debate. Our 2020 presidential coverage, at least for the Democrat primaries, won't really extend past the debates...

Tulsi Gabbard also didn't qualify for September's debate due to rather arbitrary (but pre-established) rules from the Democrat National Committee. Disgusting Kamala Harris supporters made a #TulsiDidntQualifyParty hashtag, still having a grudge from when Tulsi Gabbard torched Kamala Harris in the second debate. They were posting happy black women .gifs or something. They might still be doing that. They're a bunch of vindictive people. Note that they know that what Tulsi said about Kamala is right, but they're so caught up in their identity politics that it doesn't matter.

But what about John Delaney? He opened up his second debate performance attacking popular-with-small-donor socialists Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren. That got him a lot of ire from progressives on Twitter during the debate, but there's literally no #DelaneyDidntQualifyParty hashtag. He just has a joke #Delaneymentum hashtag used by someone promoting a John Delaney drop out petition with thousands of signatures and has become the Democrat 2020 version of Jim Gilmore back in 2015–2016 with Gilmentum.

The John Delaney campaign has made an announcement stating it won't drop out because it wishes to tell the truth. We're all about the truth on KoopaTV. Levity, too.

Here's the truth.

John Delaney isn't a Republican in disguise. He's not even a moderate. He's an extreme, anti-Trump, big government left-winger just like the rest of them. 

Thursday, August 29, 2019

Class President Bowser Versus Recess

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Why Lord Bowser is noble for wishing to cancel recess.

For those who go to school, you're either already back in school, or you will be early next week. If KoopaTV's political banter scares you away (having a tab called “2020 Presidential Debate Index” may intimidate politically disinclined children... and adults, for that matter), I wonder what you think of student governance. After all, your fellow students may run for class president.

If you're cynical, you probably think of those class-presidential aspirations as nothing more than a joke. Well, that's... roughly how we treat the presidential aspirations of the whole United States of America.

There is, however, one candidate for class president that is not doing it for the jokes. In fact, he's very serious, and very capable, and has a plan that benefits... himself, at least.

I'm talking about King Bowser Koopa for class president. If you click that link, you're forced to engage in a riddle just to be aware of his platform. Clearly, Lord Bowser's candidacy is for the more intellectual of the students.

Play Nintendo Bowser for class president back to school cancel recess
For the purposes of proceeding with this article, the secret message reads, “So he can cancel recess!”

Among other obvious questions, my number one question is why does the top of the page state “Bowser’s running for class president, but it’s not because he wants to help anyone…except for himself!”? Assuming that statement is true, how would cancelling recess help Lord Bowser?

I asked the producer of the Play Nintendo site, and she responded with...

Wednesday, August 28, 2019

The Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Characters Used The MOST and the LEAST In August 2019!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - You can bet it'll be this way until Banjo comes out.

The fact is that I didn't do as well as I thought I'd do in the Nintendo-sponsored, Battlefy-hosted Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open August 2019. Sure, I barely got into the top 10% of people who actually played in my region (see the comments section of that article for my journey), but that's still far from the Top 32 required to get into the Bracket Round. My bracket picture in that article was thus considered FAKE NEWS because it included a picture of Ludwig in the Bracket Round, but I wasn't in it and neither was any other Ludwig player.

It was an intense experience all around, and playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate with tournament-stakes for four hours straight (controversially extended to five at the end of the fourth hour) is far more grueling than playing Splatoon 2 Splatfest Turf Wars for the same amount of time. 

In the end, the four North American players that will be flown to Japan for the Nintendo Live tournament are Epic Gabriel (Region 6, Florida, R.O.B.), Wrath (Region 6, Georgia, Sonic), YoseFu (Region 5, ??? somewhere near Mississippi, Simon Belmont), and Heeew (Region 3, ??? somewhere near Texas, Richter Belmont).

To make this article more interesting for you, the reader, I've went to the stats sections for all of the eight regions, aggregated all of the data, and determined who the most-used characters are. This is based on 6,743 North American players who played at least one match (out of 12,322 who registered), and a total of 89,136 games played (multiply that by 2 to know the total number of characters used) in the Ladder Round. Here are the results, which you can use for yourself to prioritise which match-ups you should learn:

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Mega Man Zero/ZX Legacy Collection and the Reploid Remixes

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Again with the Mega Man soundtrack pre-order bonus?

Pretty big news drop today. CAPCOM announced Mega Man Zero/ZX Legacy Collection to release January 21, 2020. It's a six-pack of the four Mega Man Zero games and the two Mega Man ZX games, and it'll be out on ALL major platforms and PC. Good stuff. Here's the announcement trailer:

I've already made my thoughts on the first Mega Man Zero Collection (containing only the four Mega Man Zero games, back on the DS) pretty clear in this article. Basically, that had an Easy Scenario in it that made the game not only really easy, but the gameplay was kind of unsatisfying since there was nothing to unlock because you had everything. But without that scenario, the games are prohibitively difficult to complete and unreasonably and permanently punish your mistakes.

Is “Casual Scenario Mode” the same thing with a different name? We'll find out later. At least it's clear that “Save-Assist” is putting a much-needed save point in the middle of the stage. Nothing wrong with that. Mega Man Zero is already brutally difficult based on the level design. There's also some kind of time attack mode called Z Chaser that they want to keep the details of a secret.

I want to draw attention to what they're calling the ten Reploid Remixes, which get their own trailer that is meant to be listened to:

Monday, August 26, 2019

The Best and Worst Nintendo Switch Online Discounts in the World!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The worst discount is more interesting to me, because that's the kind of person I am.

Hey, want to save money? Sure you do.

Normally $35 through the Nintendo eShop, the Nintendo Switch Online Family Membership is on sale at $28 instead of $35 at Target right now. Family Groups are how KoopaTV's members are all on the same plan—it's a quirk for being employed at KoopaTV. You can purchase this to stack with an existing family plan. If you want to be in the KoopaTV Nintendo Switch Online Family Group without being in KoopaTV's staff, the spot currently held by the winner of KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program Round 22 will be up for grabs as the prize for Round 28 (September 1 to October 31...that's starting super soon).

If you're like me and haven't yet purchased the Fighter Pass for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, then you're in luck. It's 20% off on Amazon at the moment. That means it's $20 instead of $25. ...Quite frankly, I still have a philosophical OBJECTION! to buying season passes without knowing exactly what's in them ahead of time. “You know what's in it! A fighter, their stage, and music!” No, I want to know what SPECIFICALLY is in it. If it's a Creeper from Minecraft with a mine stage with “Revenge” as the music, I'd rather buy all the other fighters individually than have that thing on my stage selection/character selection screens. Not all characters and franchises are created equally.

Hey, want to waste money? Sure you do.

Normally $20 through the Nintendo eShop, the Nintendo Switch Online 12-month membership is on sale at $25.18 instead of $32.27 at right now. ...I recommend you read that sentence again. marketamerica scam worst Nintendo Switch Online membership reverse discount rip-off
What the...? But yet... this is truly what is offering. I know, it sounds too bad to be true.
$32.27? No, you save $7.09 for $25.18! ...For a membership card that says $19.99 right on it.

That sort of thing is probably why, despite the excellent and premium domain name, is not among the eCommerce giants that make up the Internet today. Even the likes of KoopaTV can run a more competent eCommerce site than that.

Which of the three discounts written about in this article is your favourite? The 20% off the Nintendo Switch Online Family Membership, the 20% off the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Fighter Pass, or the 26% on the Nintendo Switch Online 12-month membership? (Ludwig decided that if a discount is “off” the price, a reverse discount is “on” the price.) Remember that if you're actively around and participating with KoopaTV for the next two months, you can get a 100% discount on a one-year Nintendo Switch Online membership!

Friday, August 23, 2019

Minecraft's Popularity and Staying Power

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - To the point where there's a whole generation of early Minecraft players that have nostalgia.

Once upon a time, it was January 2016, and I wrote this in an article about Minecraft: Education Edition:
“With any luck, children will associate Minecraft with school and stop playing it at home because it's not cool to do school stuff in your free personal time. Could we finally see the tight grip that Minecraft has on our nation's impressionable youth loosen up? Kids can stop being really annoying Minecraft fans (and will probably obsess over something else that hopefully isn't ugly to view in a social media feed), and videogames get the esteem of being versatile educational tools.

Seems like a win-win to me.”

Put that on the mental list of things I've written that haven't aged well, though arguably I predicted the Fortnite obsession. (Unfortunately, Fortnite is also ugly to view.) According to the kids these days, Minecraft is more popular than ever in a great resurgence, with a whole dedicated retail shelf in game stores. I don't really know when it ever dropped in popularity. It was popular enough in 2018 to shut down several school systems. It was popular enough in 2015 to be used as a Japanese meme against ISIS. Since its 2011 release, it's been ported everywhere and has only been accumulating more and more fans. Minecraft is even either the most-sold game of all time or the second-most.

It bothers me. Especially when the fans go and have multiple generations of people. That's a testament to its longevity and non-stop existence.

There is this extremely irritating Minecraft meme going around that's located where kids hang out, including Discord and other chatrooms, where they try to spam the chat with the correct lyrics to this 2011 Minecraft parody song “Revenge” that I've never heard before; made by this Minecraft YouTuber named CaptainSparklez that I've never heard of. The song has almost 200 million views on YouTube and the guy has almost 10.5 million subscribers, but whatever, that's just a symbol of how many braindead Minecraft fans there are. Apparently the song was popular back then and now a bunch of people got nostalgic for it. Who knows.

I hyperlinked to the song but didn't embed it, since it's rather terrible and not worth listening to or reading the lyrics of. (Whether in complete form or dumb kids with attention deficit disorder badly attempting to complete the whole thing in pieces.) I listened to it solely as research for this article, and I regretted it immediately. But since I subjected myself to that aural poison, there's no way I'm not gonna try and do something productive with that experience (write an article).  Here it is. You got me to write an article about your meme even though this site supposedly has a policy against that.

Please stop it. You can even keep playing Minecraft. Just stop the damn “Creeper aw man” crap.

Revenge CaptainSparklez Minecraft Creeper Aw Man 200 million views YouTube meme
Unfortunately for you, while I didn't embed the song, I do need a picture in this article for it to be popular.
...And according to the kids, anything and everything with Minecraft becomes popular. So here we go!

This article exists because Ludwig remembered he wrote that paragraph about Minecraft: Education Edition while he was reading Microsoft's letter to the Office of the United States Trade Representative which mentioned it as an example of how games are good for America. And he is really annoyed by that forced meme. He's almost 100% sure that this article will backfire and make kids continue it instead of stop it, which he will view as a commentary on how easily reverse-psychologically manipulable children can be.

Thursday, August 22, 2019

Benjamin Hunter Returns In Ace Attorney Trilogy Languages Patch; CAPCOM Publisher Sale 2019


Back in May 2018, KoopaTV first reported on the unfortunate mental health issues of Los Angeles prosecutor Miles Edgeworth. The prosecutor fled to France to die and took on the name BENJAMIN HUNTER.

A month later, we gave an update on Miles Edgeworth/Benjamin Hunter. He was still alive, though curiously was training an ape

After that, we haven't heard from Mr. Hunter. Many assumed he's dead, since that was his intention.

Well, thanks to the new language patch in Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Trilogy (available today on Steam, PlayStation 4, Xbox One, and Switch for French, German, Korean, Simplified Chinese, and Traditional Chinese), we've discovered that Benjamin Hunter is, in fact, alive. We found this out from a French (?) detective, Dick Tektiv. 

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney Trilogy French Dick Tektiv Detective Gumshoe
“Exact, my guy... M. Benjamin Hunter en personne !”
Approximately means, “Exactly, my guy. Mr. Benjamin Hunter in person!”
Mr. Benjamin Hunter, in fact, still appears in the French courts. We're glad he's still alive. However, it doesn't seem like we were supposed to be aware of that information, and Dick Tektiv gave it to us inappropriately:

Wednesday, August 21, 2019

Classic 2D Events at the Olympics Are Of No Interest

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Super Mario Bros. 8-Bit Sprites are ugly.

A month ago, I dedicated an article showing the latest footage of Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020, which showcased Lord Bowser trouncing Mario at a variety of sports. In that article, I wrote,
“As far as I'm concerned, there's nothing inspiring about the sporting events’ gameplay, sound design (or music), and especially not the graphics.”

Nintendo wanted to contradict my last statement about graphics, so they released this trailer that reveals “Classic 2D Events”, claiming to “take the series to a new dimension with 10 classic 2D events starring your favorite characters[.]”

I object to this characterisation.

Tuesday, August 20, 2019

The KoopaTV Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) Report

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Will be updated all the time. Not just once a year!

Dear readers, players, fans, trolls: Welcome to KoopaTV's Corporate Social Responsibility and Sustainability Report. We at KoopaTV's staff are strongly supportive of doing good in our world and yours.

We've also been reading what the consultants are saying. People, especially younger people (Millennials) in our target demographic, want to be part of something greater than themselves. A community. That goes for both customer and potential future staffers. To that end, and without sacrificing or selling out our principles in any way, we're publishing this always-active Corporate Social Responsibility report. This will look at our activities from a variety of perspectives, demonstrated by the headings.

In fact, we'll have a table of contents:

KoopaTV's Social and Societal Contributions
Disaster Relief in Sierra Leone
Accessibility Activism
Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Free Rescues
KoopaTV Promotes Literacy and Self-Worth Across Koopa Kingdom
KoopaTV's Environmental and Sustainability Contributions

Monday, August 19, 2019

Ludwig Ventures to Best Buy... Does He Get Fire Emblem: Three Houses?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Did I buy the game? ...And what else did I see there?

I needed to refill my stash of Nintendo eShop gift cards. If I don't have a supply of those at my desk, you all won't be happy, since I'm supposed to give those codes away in the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program.

So I went to Best Buy to buy some more.

And I saw many, many troubling things in the world of retail.

For one, Nintendo apparently replaced Lord Bowser as the face of the $50 Nintendo eShop gift card with... LINK. Is this how Andrew Jackson is going to feel? What was wrong with Bowser?

But there's a lot more insights. For example, take a look at what's left of the amiibo section. This used to be a big shelf

Friday, August 16, 2019

A Player vs. Player Battling Update For Pokémon Sword & Shield


Last week, I was praising The Pokémon Company International from refraining from weekly updates for Pokémon Sword and Pokémon Shield. The fact that I'm starting off a new article this week with that message probably means that we got a new update and that cadence makes me frown.

Oh well. Watch the obligatory trailer. But as far as I'm concerned, the most important information is tucked away on the official website:

Last week I wondered if Galarian Weezing's second ability would explain why it's a Fairy type. Neutralizing Gas doesn't scream “Fairy” to me. Well, eh, that's not true. The fairies in A Midsummer Night's Dream did all kinds of things like that. Perhaps I'll nickname Galarian Weezing “Puck”.

Dynamaxing requires a Key Item (the Dynamax Band), but the actual Pokémon doesn't need an item. They can hold whatever they want, unlike a Z-Move or a Mega Evolution. That means you can flexibly choose who will Dynamax as the battle unfolds, instead of committing to it ahead of time. I think that's a net positive.

The most important aspect of today's announcement is the Battle Stadium, the online player vs. player area. There's Ranked Battles, which match-makes you based on your win rate by putting you in tiers. This partially resets after every “season” to make sure people keep playing instead of getting at the top and no longer playing, a weakness in other ladder systems that lack decay. There are also Casual Battles, because it's important for matchmaking services to offer ranked and unranked matches. (Take notes, Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.)

The most important aspect of the most important aspect are Rental Teams, though.

Pokémon Sword Shield Rental Teams battle stadium official website
Now, despite how bad the movesets look on the left, these are player-generated Rentals, not GAME FREAK-generated.

There is a reason why Battle Factory was my favourite facility in the Battle Frontier (back when it existed). I don't like team-building. I REALLY don't like team-building in-game. I have amazing Pokémon knowledge and good decision-making and adaptable thinking.

Rental Teams means that I can enjoy Pokémon Shield's story mode for the story and not have to worry about training for effort values or mass-breeding for the best individual values (eugenics). If I want to have fun competitively, I can just download someone's Rental Team! And you can bet there will be vast communities out there listing all of their Rental Teams. Good addition.

Ludwig skipped over a lot of minute details about some new items and specific effects of some Max Moves, but he figures no one cares about that. Do you care about the player vs. player aspect of in-game Pokémon? If so, what do you think about these additions? If not, why don't these additions make you care?

Back to new Pokémon and features being introduced in September... and more food.

Thursday, August 15, 2019

DuckTales Died For Street Fighter-cosplaying Duck Figures?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I think it's worth it?

Last week, CAPCOM announced that DuckTales: Remastered would be leaving digital storefronts on August 8–9, 2019. It's gone now from all consoles and Steam.

Nevermind that no one's been thinking about DuckTales: Remastered recently. In fact, the last time we did, it was March 2014 and it was an entire gaming generation ago. The caption associated with DuckTales didn't age well, I guess:
“Why leave DuckTales to die when it can see new life and new sales from new folks?” 

No explanation was provided, though Disney is probably responsible. It seems highly doubtful that CAPCOM woke up one day and decided to kill it off—though Disney likes doing that with licensing and expirations. Probably pretty similar to what happened to the Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games series on the Nintendo eShop. Either way, you can still redownload DuckTales: Remastered if you purchased it previously but removed it. No one is stopping you from still playing it. And, of course, good ol’ reliable physical versions still work.

Nintendo did their weird thing where they scrubbed DuckTales: Remastered from their website entirely. (Archived game page here.) CAPCOM still has their page up, because the game still exists. Developer WayForward (CAPCOM is only the publisher) still has the page up on their website, because the game still exists. ...I guess after this article is published those pages might go disappear.

Anyway, where those ducks have fallen (perhaps they got hunted, as was a popular sport back in the DuckTales heyday), new ducks have taken flight. And this remains CAPCOM-related, so this probably is a big conspiracy. Behold, the TUBBZ cosplaying Duck collectibles, featuring Street Fighter:

Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Tips, Tricks, and Insider Information to the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open August 2019

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Read this, and you'll be well-prepared to perform excellently this Saturday.

Have you joined the thousands of people across Mexico, the United States (except territories and Puerto Rico), and Canada (except Quebec) in the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open August 2019? If you haven't, you can join here. If you have, you may have some questions. KoopaTV, through interviewing the tournament administrators at Battlefy (they like us enough to send me a shirt, which in no way biases my coverage) and reading the rules for you—plus having a lot of experience in the prior tournaments in this series—is here to help with some answers.

What you're about to read are the basics of the tournament, such as the prizes, rules, and tournament structure... and then my tips on how to win and take full advantage of those rules for your benefit. You'll also read some undisclosed insider information I managed to get from interviewing a Battlefy representative.

The Basics: August Open Prizes, Rules, and Tournament Structure

The Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open August 2019, unlike Nintendo's other partnerships with Battlefy this year, will feature NO ITEMS in ANY round of play. It's a best-of-three (first to two won games wins the set), three-stock, seven-minute format. The stages are the same mixed bag from the June Open: Final Destination, Battlefield, Smashville, Yoshi's Island (from Super Smash Bros. Brawl), Pokémon Stadium 2, Castle Siege, and Frigate Orpheon. All stages have hazards off, and your Battle Arena will need to have the stage selection set to Random.

This is the ruleset for the entire duration of the tournament, which begins and ends on August 17, 2019. It begins at 9 AM Pacific/12 PM Eastern, and continues for four hours in the Ladder Round. After that's done, there's the single-elimination Bracket Round for the 32 best players in each region for a 256-person bracket which begins at 2 PM Pacific/5 PM Eastern. Expect to play for a while.

To make my point more clear, I created this picture of the tournament structure:

Tuesday, August 13, 2019

The Trump That Saved Christmas From Tariffs On China...Because of Game Boy Camera Lies?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - ...He saved it from himself, but hey, who's keeping score?

While we were rating how Microsoft and Nintendo (but not Sony) did at E3 2019, those three major console manufacturers were writing to the Office of the United States Trade Representative, out of great concern for President Donald John Trump's announced tariffs (taxes) on $300 billion worth of Chinese imports, in pursuit of addressing things like intellectual property theft.

I did write years ago during the 2016 campaign that candidate Donald Trump would take China intellectual property theft seriously as President Donald John Trump, writing,
“Which candidate for United States president best sides with the videogame industry, an industry that thrives on exploiting intellectual property? Donald Trump, the man who will have a zero-tolerance policy on China's abuses? Or Hillary Clinton, the woman who tried to destroy the industry within the United States of America, and has no position or plan on China and its intellectual property abuse?”

Alright, if the videogame industry has to write a letter to President Donald John Trump to not screw up the videogame industry over China, then candidate Donald Trump might not have been the best candidate for the videogame industry on the China issue. ...Eh, well, still can't be worse than Hillary.

REGARDLESS. The tariffs have been delayed until December 15 (from September 1), which means that, unless you're highly irresponsible and buying directly from China (retailers will stock up prior to the tariffs taking effect), the holiday season will be free of the price increases that tariffs would necessitate. Hooray. For now.

Christmas is saved. And Black Friday/Thanksgiving.

And Chanukkah too, I guess. But there's more to the story, especially regarding the contents of the console manufacturers’ letter.

Monday, August 12, 2019

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Online Tourney Events Aren't Worth Writing About

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's much lower effort.

I just wrote about how Splatfests have officially ended in Splatoon 2, and that I'll miss writing Splatfest articles on KoopaTV for a while—or perhaps we'll never see them again if “Splatoon 3”  doesn't go as planned. In that article's italicised footer, I asked if there are any alternatives to Splatfests out there so we can keep writing that style of article.

Cue last weekend. Nintendo invented a special Event tournament for its new (4.0.0) Online Tourney mode in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. What's special about it? It's themed Heroes vs. Villains. Here's the description:
“It's a clash of good against evil! This tourney is on for a limited time and allows only certain fighters.

The further you advance, the better the spirit you'll win!”
Does that mean that Nintendo will be bringing back Splatfest-esque competitions, just in another game? And KoopaTV should write about them? Heroes vs. Villains is literally even a Splatfest theme from Splatoon 2 (made in coordination with the release of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate)—and of course I chose Villains back then.

The answer to those questions is “no.” Here's why:

Friday, August 9, 2019

June 30, 2019 Nintendo Quarterly Financial Update

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I thought there'd be questions. More importantly, answers.

It is August 9 today. Does the article headline seem a bit weird to you? Yeah, I'm talking about stuff from June 30. But it wasn't released until July 30. ...And it's been still late ever since because I've been waiting for an investor question & answer session or an actual company briefing with slides and information. Those are the most interesting part of these.

But there isn't any and if I keep waiting for one, I'll probably miss this quarter entirely.

Unfortunately, without questions and answers, there isn't really anything interesting in this. Here's the obligated chart of >million-seller Nintendo Switch titles that aren't the very top echelon and would break the scale. Now Super Mario Maker 2 is on there, with 2.42 million sold:

Nintendo Switch software titles sold June 30 2019 Super Mario Maker 2 Tennis Aces Bros. U Deluxe 1-2 Switch
Seriously, who the hell is buying New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe?
Also, I'm very displeased to report that Kirby Star Allies has stopped being relevant to Nintendo.
(Ludwig still thinks March is 30 days long, but that'll be fixed in three months.)
For some reason, Mario Kart 8 Deluxe managed to sell over a million copies in the three months between April 1 and June 30. Super Smash Bros. Ultimate hasn't managed to do that.

There are 36.87 million Switch consoles sold, and 17.89 million of Mario Kart 8 Deluxe sold. Only 14.73 million Super Smash Bros. Ultimate sold. Those are scary high attach rates. Meanwhile, Splatoon 2 is only at a mere 9.02 million.

Without questions and answers, I have nothing but numbers to throw at you. Perhaps there's no session because Nintendo is busy with a corporate social responsibility (CSR) report or something. Yuck. It features such momentous statements like,

Compliance Code of Conduct
Maintain a resolute stance against anti-social forces.
Our position on anti-social forces is unwavering.
...Yeah, whatever. So's my commitment to writing articles on these quarterly updates, even if it's total filler for this site.

There's some bits of that CSR report that warrant much further commentary and investigation, but that's outside the scope of this article, even if this article only exists to serve as a reference for later.

Thursday, August 8, 2019

Cadence of Hyrule Free Demo Available! Impressions Inside...

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - You're free to demonise my impressions. They're controversial.

Today I got a Nintendo Switch News notification that Cadence of Hyrule: Crypt of the NecroDancer Featuring The Legend of Zelda (henceforth referred to as just Cadence of Hyrule) has a free demo. Sure, I'll try it. It did dazzle us during that Nindies session some time ago. It's developed by indie company Brace Yourself Games in an amazing development story where Nintendo pretty much just said, yes, sure, you can use our intellectual property.

Fun times. But is Cadence of Hyrule itself a fun time?

Cadence of Hyrule is immediately striking in that its music—over a couple dozen remixes of The Legend of Zelda series music that each have contextually-differing tempos and senses of urgencies—is fantastic. A clear contrast from the aural failings that The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild last brought to the series. Plus, the graphics remind me of The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap, which is always a positive.

Looking through the general options menu, there's all sorts of options for accessibility including language selection and a friendly-to-the-colour-blind option. The demo takes you right to making a new game (with yourself or with a second player), and as far as I could tell, I was beginning the game like the full game would be. (It was later made obvious that, no, the full game doesn't have this same progression.)

I couldn't tell from the demo how involved the story would be throughout the game, but the gist seems to be some music-related jerk named Octavo (not to be confused with DJ Octavio of Splatoon) is doing something bad in Hyrule even though he doesn't belong there, and he has four Champion bosses that are enforcing whatever his bad thing is.

As for gameplay...