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Friday, June 30, 2023

Buy the Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective Remaster!

>By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Play the free demo if you feel nervous about the idea!

Today, several notable videogame titles released on the market. I have no problem with them (except for probably Everybody 1-2-Switch), but I will have a problem with YOU if you do not strongly consider purchasing the HD remaster of Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective, available on all modern gaming platforms at the moment. I'm saying this as someone who still has the DS cartridge (but also considers its 2011 release to be a top 10 game released in the 2010s.) Here is the launch trailer particular to the Nintendo Switch.

The trailer might make it seem like any typical murder mystery adventure game (featuring time travel), but unlike, say, Ace Attorney, Ghost Trick (written by Shu Takumi, who wrote several Ace Attorney titles) is significantly more interactive. You're not just pushing A to scroll through text and occasionally making menu-based selections (by no means do I personally have an issue with that level of interactivity, but I know some people I've tried pitching Ace Attorney to do have that problem); your spirit is constantly moving around, and you must move around strategically. The puzzles get multi-layered and quite involved as the game progresses, though you can try again as often as you'd like.

Ghost Trick Phantom Detective remastered Nintendo Switch Ghost World possess an object Sissel
Non-living or non-formerly living objects are all across detailed environments, and moving from possessing one to another within your range is how you move.
...And some objects let you perform an action, too.

Thursday, June 29, 2023

Ike (from Fire Emblem) is Not Gay

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The accusations against him are playground bully logic. Instead...

For several years, KoopaTV's comments section has been assailed by weirdos who insist that Ike from Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance and Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn is gay. Or maybe it's the same guy.

Unfortunately, it's not just that one guy who has been spreading this claims about Ike. There is a whole part of the Fire Emblem fanbase that has mistaken beliefs about romantic and/or sexual relationships, including many people that are themselves gay. It's very strange to see to see, but a big part of it is that there is a movement (that doesn't care about the truth) that wants to redefine any and every character as gay, in their image. (Some game developers are also interested in doing this to their own characters, or as the basis for making new characters.) They even want to say I'm gay. And to that, I say, don't say gay!

...Seriously, don't. It's not a very precise term. (And it's only in my article headline because that's the terminology people keep using, not because it's good terminology.) Instead, take a look at this 2x2 matrix I've developed. It's... not a very original thought, but it's a concept a lot of people don't understand, including laypeople:

2x2 matrix table chart asexual aromantic homosexual homoromantic heterosexual heteroromantic bisexual biromantic same opposite sex
This 2x2 matrix represents classifications on romantic and sexual attractions, based on attraction/no attraction to the same or opposite sex. (For more information, research “split attraction model.”)
The sexual identity movement tries to overcomplicate this with ideas of >2 genders and words with complex prefixes to feel unique and quirky, but this chart is the basic and enduring truth.
(There... may be one possible addition or complication to this that may explain common attractions in Fire Emblem, however.)

This chart may raise even more questions, so before I go to talking about Ike's life specifically, I'll answer some of those questions.

Wednesday, June 28, 2023

Left-Handedness Deserves More Recognition

By WITCH PRINCESS - It's hard to operate in the world with your preferred hand when almost everything wasn't designed for you to do so.

If you couldn’t tell from the title of the article, I am a left-handed witch. That means I pretty much am accustomed to doing (almost) everything with my left hand, from writing to eating to using a physical calculator.

I say almost in parenthesis because there are things such as cars, computers, and even video game console controllers that require me to use my right hand much to my displeasure.

My dominant hand has always been my left, according to my parents. Fortunately, I had parents who never tried to “retrain” me to use my right hand instead of my left. However, just because they didn’t doesn’t mean I was free of right-handed influence. There’s a whole list here dedicated to lefty problems!

The main problem I’m going to share with you though relates to gaming for lefties, specifically, a call to Nintendo and other companies to design ergonomic controllers for us!

Tuesday, June 27, 2023

Mario's Subcon Dream Comes From Childhood Memories

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - More specifically, the events of Super Mario Bros. 2 was influenced by the events of Yoshi's Island (chronologically).

Remember: The events of Super Mario Bros. 2 (or Super Mario Advance, the superior way to experience it) were all a dream. They did not actually happen. ...Sorry, I guess that spoiled the game's ending, but I'd like to think everyone knew that already.

That isn't a controversial statement—or shouldn't be, if you understand dreams. However, even though the events of the dream are fictitious, they do represent—even in an indirect way—things that actually happened to the person who was dreaming (Mario). For more information, let's ask an expert in the field. He's known as Pewter. He seems to know what he's talking about:

AI The Somnium Files Pewter explanation of dreams constructed from images experiences memories of dreamer subject
Pewter: Dreams can only be constructed from images and experiences the subject was present for.
Mizuki's Somnium couldn't have contained that figure if she didn't see it in person.
Of course, not everything we see in our dreams looks exactly the same as it did in the real world.
You saw some strange things in Somnium earlier, didn't you, Date?
That event you experienced is obviously not as it happened in reality.
Dreams are a collage of many memories intertwining and blending with each other.
Your skills as a Psyncer allow you to untangle those dreams and solve mysteries no one else can.

What does the state of Mario's dreamy experience in Super Mario Bros. 2 have to say about his past experiences? I believe the memories he's conjured up come from his childhood, or more specifically, his state as a baby or toddler. Now, this can get messy, because Mario has a time machine, and that's how Baby Mario can co-exist with his adult self in the present at times (or sometimes his adult self is in the past). And sometimes he's even employed his baby self as a... doctor? So that causes scenarios where Baby Mario's memories involve things he's seen way into the future, and that affects Mario's dreams in the present (or past relative to today, when he actually had the dream told by Super Mario Bros. 2). In other words, because of his baby self time travelling, Mario as of Super Mario Bros. 2 is able to dream of things that hadn't happened yet in his life because those were past memories encountered by his baby self in the future.

AI The Somnium Files Date hiding something Mario mannekin
With that caveat out of the way, we'll try to understand Mario's subconscious for the rest of this article.

Monday, June 26, 2023

Pokémon Stadium Kids Club Minigame Tier List

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Worst-to-best of the nine minigames in Pokémon Stadium!

A few months back right after the first Pokémon Stadium became available on the Nintendo 64 emulator on Nintendo Switch Online + Expansion Pack, I wrote an article about how Generation 1 mechanics really don't hold up today. I also wrote about how the minigame aspect (the Kids Club) is overrated, because the quality of the minigames themselves are lacking. Today, I'm going to go into more detail about those minigames and how they are designed, rating them in a worst-to-best tier list. My experiences are based on playing the minigames both with three other computer players, as well as with other real people. Also, note that my ratings are based on playing Pokémon Stadium on the Nintendo Switch. I DID play it on the Nintendo 64, but my game design thoughts are significantly more refined now.

Pokémon Stadium unlocking HYPER difficulty mode computer players Kids Club minigames
If you get five minigame wins in a row in “Who's the best?” mode on HARD difficulty, you'll unlock HYPER difficulty.
It's not more fun than HARD, and winning is sometimes impossible.

Ekans’ Hoop Hurl

In-game Description:
Aim using the + Control Pad. Pull back and flick the Control Stick to launch EKANS.
The one with the highest score wins.
Pull the Control Stick back further to toss further.
Flick it lightly to toss a short distance.
Featured Pokémon
Ekans (controlled), Diglett (objective), Dugtrio (design of the floor)
60 seconds. The player with the highest score at the end of that time wins. Ties are possible.
Ekans’ Hoop Hurl is easily the worst minigame of Pokémon Stadium—and I'd argue among the worst experiences of the entire Nintendo 64 library. It is one of the very few Nintendo 64 experiences that asks you to use both the Control Stick and the Control Pad at the same time. This is terrible for several reasons, including how uncomfortable it is.

I'd like to show you the in-game description below. Pay particular attention at the photo of how you are supposed to hold the controller. Note that controllers don't look like this anymore: Both the Nintendo Switch Pro Controller and Nintendo GameCube Controller, as examples, have the Control Stick at the top left of the controller and a D-Pad southeast of it. Those controllers also have two prongs for two-handed people, instead of the Nintendo 64's three prongs for three-handed people:

Friday, June 23, 2023

Ludwig's First-Ever Visit to a Physical Therapist

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - An evaluation appointment. Treatment appointments to come. (Now updated at the bottom of the article.)

I haven't played Ring Fit Adventure since the start of 2023. There is something resembling a good reason for this: I've been in pain for the past four months, particularly on my right hip. As opposed to persistent pain in my left hip at the end of 2021. You probably have the impression that my body is a mess. You would be right.

Since I haven't been totally following my chiropractor's fitness advice (and my chiropractor helps me feel better but doesn't cure my pain in the long-term), my primary care physician suggested I go to a physical therapist (PT). It takes quite a while to schedule an evaluation appointment with a physical therapist, since I suppose they're in big demand. (My doctor also refused to let me get an MRI or X-ray because he thinks I'm too young to have problems). But today I finally got one! For the first time ever. Lemme tell you what happened.

Thursday, June 22, 2023

The Mushroom Kingdom Hyperinflation and its Problem for the Koopa Clan

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - About the devaluation of the gold coin thanks to Princess Peach's monetary mismanagement.

The gold coins in the Mushroom Kingdom are practically useless. As the reigning monarch of the Mushroom Kingdom, Princess Peach is accountable and responsible for this result that damages the living standards and economy of the Mushroom Kingdom. And as trading partners and users of the same gold coin currency, Koopa Kingdom has a vested interest in wanting the currency to be useful.

For almost twenty years now, I've been thinking about the drastic currency fluctuations the gold coin has had, especially in a short period of time. Take a look at this:

Mario & Luigi Superstar Saga Tolstar Stardust Fields currency exchange conversion Mushroom Beanbean gold coins gif

According to that exchange rate, 115 Mushroom Kingdom gold coins equal 10 Beanbean Kingdom coins, or 11.5 Mushroom coins to 1 Beanbean coin. That's not inherently bad. But what is bad is the exchange rate a mere few weeks later:

Mario & Luigi Superstar Saga Prince Peasley bet Mushroom Beanbean coins conversion currency exchange gif

99,999,999,999,999 Mushroom coins converted to a mere 99 Beanbean coins. (That's 99 trillion, 999 billion, 999 million, 999 thousand, 999 coins.) That's an exchange rate of 1,010,101,010,101 Mushroom coins to 1 Beanbean coin. (That's 1 trillion, 10 billion, 101 million, 10 thousand, 101 coins.) That's a percent change of approximately 8,783,487,044,256.52%. Many economists seem to like the definition of “hyperinflation” being a 50% change in a month. It's almost unfathomable how much more reasonable a normal hyperinflation would be compared to what the Mushroom Kingdom goes through.

Wednesday, June 21, 2023

Nintendo Direct June 21, 2023 Live Reactions!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - There's a lot of emotion involved, at least.

Today, there was a Nintendo Direct livestream featuring roughly 40 minutes of information focused mainly on Nintendo Switch titles launching this year, including new details on Pikmin 4. Watch it embedded here:

I gave a live-reacted text log (annotated with select screenshots) below. KoopaTV staffer Kamek is also present in the log... in his own way.

[9:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM AHH
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Back.
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not sure if I did a good job wiping myself but I don't have enough time for that!
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Some people have already asked me what I expect or want to see in this Nintendo Direct. I expect nothing. I didn't ask for this event to happen.
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But I am interested in the fact that media people / influencers / whomever have claimed that Nintendo backed out of E3 2023 because they have a weak lineup and have nothing to show.
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: First thing: Pokémon.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Someone also told me there wouldn't be Pokémon at Nintendo Direct because Pokémon has their own event.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Obviously mistaken.

Tuesday, June 20, 2023

The NintendoVS Challenge Cup June 2023 is a Siren's Song

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Alternatively, it's a devil's deal, and it's far from guaranteed.

I will start by proclaiming that Nintendo obviously reads KoopaTV. First, I complained about the methods of entering Nintendo Live FOR SURE (and not by lottery) involved two Splatoon 3 competitive tournaments and a Mario Kart 8 Deluxe event... to the exclusion of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. In response, Nintendo revealed the four tournaments to take place at Nintendo Live (as opposed to enter Nintendo Live). Two of them were for Splatoon 3 and Mario Kart 8 Deluxe, but the other two were for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. Though it's still a problem that getting into Nintendo Live is a luck-based mission, and only one day is available. Those Splatoon 3 tournaments and the Mario Kart 8 Deluxe event are over, after all.

Well, if you want a Super Smash Bros. Ultimate event to guarantee your entry to Nintendo Live, check out...

NintendoVS Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Challenge Cup June 2023 logo key art banner
I really like this key art. It's great for the start of summer.

The NintendoVS Challenge Cup June 2023! ...Sounds fancy and cool, right? Well, you're going to want to look closely at the ruleset, because it's a very raw deal. Even worse, it's a NintendoVS Challenge Cup. And unlike the Challenge Cup mode in Pokémon Stadium 2 (coming to Nintendo Switch Online + Expansion Pack this year), this Challenge Cup is a horror. So much that I've been consistently recommending people DO NOT PARTICIPATE. Here's why, once again.

Monday, June 19, 2023

Gender Equality In Our Forces

By SHINYGIRAFARIG - Women can be both Troops and Commanding Officers

I emailed to WayForward Support on July 24, 2021:

Please put in female Infantry for Orange Star for Advance Wars 1+2: Re-Boot Camp

The US Senate finally voted to have women be required to sign up for the Selective Service System. It would be wonderful if Orange Star, the US's Advance Wars counterpart, shows this new change and have female infantry as well.

Thanks so much.

An Advance Wars fan.

Aaron from WayForward then replied this:


Thanks for writing in! Though I can't make any promises, as we don't have complete control over the project, I've passed your request onto the director of the game. :)



Advance Wars 1+2: Re-Boot Camp eventually released. I decided to play the second game first because I wanted to see Lash and Jess as early as possible. During the playthrough of the Orange Star missions I noticed this:

Friday, June 16, 2023

Selected Research From SLEEP 2023

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - We hope you have a good night after reading about these seven studies.

In honour (or dishonour) of my total lack of sleep due to the recent reaction log deep into the night with the disappointing Grasshopper Manufacture Direct, let's turn our attention to SLEEP 2023, which was a conference that took place this year during June 3–June 7 in Indianapolis, Indiana. SLEEP is brought to sleep professionals every year by the Associated Professional Sleep Societies (APSS), a collaboration of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) and the Sleep Research Society. The names of those should tell you that SLEEP is where professionals in sleep medicine—both researchers and practitioners (and students of those)—come together to share learnings and best practices. Oh, and to network!

There are hundreds of abstracts involved in the meeting and there were many sessions, including an advocacy session ran by our friends in common cause, Save Standard Time and Dr. Karin Johnson. Here is a sampling of seven studies that SLEEP's news section highlighted and my thoughts on them. ...Note that I didn't actually attend the conference.

Teens with irregular sleep patterns have higher risk of school problems

The first study suggests that the keys to a good sleep for teenagers are sleeping for long enough (8–10 hours), at the right time every time, and not being interrupted. When teenagers have a greatly varying sleep schedule or habits, they are much more likely to perform poorly in school, such as being 42% more likely to be suspended or expelled or 29% more likely to receive a D or F as their course grade. Researchers therefore believe that teenagers ought to get a stable sleep schedule in order to perform better in school and be better behaved.

Thursday, June 15, 2023

Grasshopper Manufacture Direct 2023 (and Delay) Live Reactions

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Most of the log is me waiting for the video to get uploaded!

After twenty-five years of existing (and of waiting, it feels like), Grasshopper Manufacture, Goichi Suda (SUDA51)'s game development studio, now has a Direct for the first time for fans and anyone else who cares to tune in! Personally, I've wanted to know what will happen with the company's projects after the tragic news of Chinese company NetEase Games acquiring Grasshopper back in 2021. Perhaps this Direct will clue us in? They did promise something would happen.

You'll notice that the Direct embed is not at the top of this article. That's because it was delayed for well over an hour. You'll have to scroll down past my rants about cursive writing (prompted by the embedded tweet) and Daylight Saving Time to get to the Direct embed, as well as my LIVE REACTION to the video, which was uploaded (significantly later than promised) but not livestreamed.

[11:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Grasshopper Manufacture isn't doing a livestream, but rather, a video.
[11:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Or, I can't find the livestream.
[12:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, YouTube has nothing there.
[12:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're not tweeting anything.
[12:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Guess this reaction log is a dud.
[12:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[12:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "We're so sorry everyone, due to some technical difficulties Grasshopper Direct is running a little bit late - but we WILL be starting soon and we'll keep you updated in real time & provide the URL soon so please check back here in a few minutes!🙇‍♂️🙏"
[12:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, I could either wait for it to start soon or I could go to sleep.
[12:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: How long will it be technically difficult? I dunno.
[12:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I KNEW THIS LOG WAS A DUD.
[12:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WHY IS THEIR PICTURE TWEET "Something's gonna happen."
[12:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NOTHIN' IS HAPPENIN'.

Wednesday, June 14, 2023

Kuru Kuru Kururin Review

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Could you say this is a Kurureview?

Since Nintendo upgraded Nintendo Switch Online + Expansion Pack to include Game Boy Advance games, you may be wondering what's worth playing! KoopaTV commenter Captain Stitch had told me:

“Cool that GBA and GB games are finally coming to switch. You should really play Kuru Kuru Kururin, it is a very fun and very addicting game. Short too, and the music is Absolutly phenomenal. Seriously, play just a bit or listen to the soundtrack you will not regret it. Everyone loves the Cave music, but I'm partial to the Cake Land music myself.”

I decided to do more than just listen to the soundtrack or play a bit... I played and beat the game, while collecting all it has to offer, including Perfect clears of its Adventure mode and Challenge mode levels. Let's get into the review to see what I think.

Fast Facts about Kuru Kuru Kururin

Kuru Kuru Kururin
Originally Game Boy Advance, but played on Nintendo Switch
Developer and Publisher
Eighting and Nintendo
Space Required
The space for the Game Boy Advance emulator provided by Nintendo Switch Online + Expansion Pack
ESRB rating
It lacks a rating due to a lack of an original American release, but I'm sure if it had one, it'd be E
Number of Players
One for most of the game's content, but there is an up-to-four-player Versus mode
Manufacturer's Suggested Retail Price
Included in Nintendo Switch Online + Expansion Pack, which KoopaTV pays $80 a year for
Nintendo Switch Online has a seven-day trial, but the Expansion Pack isn't included, so no demo

Tuesday, June 13, 2023

Chatot Parting Shots “Objection!” and Other Ace Attorney Speech Bubbles

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - A collection of speech bubbles.

There was once a trailer for Pokémon Shining Pearl and Pokémon Brilliant Diamond featuring Chatot using Parting Shot. The description for Parting Shot is, “With a parting threat, the user lowers the target's Attack and Sp. Atk stats. Then it switches with a party Pokémon.” That threat is why Parting Shot is also a sound-based attack. However, I didn't know the move's animation was for Parting Shot, which is a very rare move that not only has poor distribution, but high level-up requirements. (In Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Pokémon Shining Pearl, Chatot is the only Pokémon that can learn Parting Shot!) Given that the trailer didn't show the effects of the move, only the animation, I thought it was Chatter... but it was not. And so I levelled up Charap (the in-game-traded Chatot) in Pokémon Shining Pearl to level 49 until it learned Parting Shot. Why did I care so much? The move's animation looks like this:

Pokémon Shining Pearl Brilliant Diamond Cleverness Contest Master Rank Star of the Show Chatot Parting Shot
A white speech bubble with a stylised black border and red text? Can it be...?

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney Objection speech bubble
...Another familiar white speech bubble with a stylised black border and red text!

What if I put these concepts together? Well, behold:

Chatot Parting Shot Objection Ace Attorney speech bubble Pokémon Brilliant Diamond Shining Pearl
Objection! You've spoken contradictory testimony!

I've made these for all of the other Ace Attorney series speech bubbles that are in the mainline six Ace Attorney titles, in honour of yesterday's announced Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney Trilogy. Take that! (That's one of many of these.)

Monday, June 12, 2023

CAPCOM Showcase of June 2023 Live Reactions

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - WAY better than I was expecting going into it!

You ought to skip 35 minutes into this. It's also not as long as it seems (only 36 minutes) since the video ends with influencers and not corporate content:

Regardless of how well you can actually watch along with me, I'm here and I live-reacted to the CAPCOM Showcase of June 12, 2023. Coinciding with this event is a MASSIVE sale across your favourite game platform(s) on CAPCOM games. That includes 58% off (the biggest discount EVER on this) on the Ace Attorney Turnabout Collection, which means only $25 for FIVE Ace Attorney titles across two individual collections. (Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Trilogy and The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles.) This deal with these games at this time gets my highest possible recommendation. Consult your favoured digital game shop for more details. The sale ends in less than two weeks, so get going.

Now, onto the log:

[5:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[5:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: or
[6:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: CAPCOM promises to discuss 36 minutes worth of content, featuring Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective, Exoprimal, and Dragon's Dogma 2. "And more!"
[6:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: One obviously wonders what "And more!" involves. I think there will be a segment on the newly released CAPCOM TOWN. Probably something on Street Fighter 6 since it just came out to big success. And probably something on the Path of the Goddess game they just announced yesterday at the Xbox Games Showcase.
[6:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: HERE WE GO
[6:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Hello, everyone!" Good start.

Ubisoft Forward June 2023 Live Reactions

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It feels like all of their games are the same and have been for some time.

While E3 2023 does not exist and I'm under no obligation to watch this, I'm pretty sure this Ubisoft presentation is what they would've shown if Ubisoft would present at E3 like they promised they would. (As opposed to quitting out of it, which caused the entire event to collapse.)

Live reacting to it (rather briskly) is... myself, in the middle of the day. The funny thing about me taking time off for E3 2023 well in advance is that since it's cancelled, all (most) of these individual company sessions aren't actually taking place in the middle or end of this week, but have already happened or are happening now.

[1:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[1:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dancing!
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Olympic eSport dancing.
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But featuring Just Dance.
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh, yeah.
[1:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They did the Olympic eSports before, but dancing wasn't part of it.

Sunday, June 11, 2023

Xbox Games Showcase 2023 + Starfield Direct Live Reactions

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - A two-for-one special!

For some time, Microsoft has been talking about a summer games showcase for the Xbox that would happen even if they didn't come to E3 2023. (And, of course, no one came to E3 2023 because it doesn't exist.)

Well, they're here now.

And we (well, just me) are here too to live react to what happened during that showcase. Added to the end is basically 45 minutes or so of just Starfield content, which I reacted to as well.

[12:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
This is the link to the so-called "Audio Description" livestream, which I assume is Microsoft's way to say "this will have captions on the screen".
[12:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: uhhhhh
[12:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THAT'S NOT CAPTIONS
[1:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[1:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: OKAY
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So that's the one I want. (But now I'm really curious about the audio description stream experience.)

Friday, June 9, 2023

Pokémon Brilliant Diamond & Shining Pearl Resolved Many of Diamond & Pearl's Release-Era Issues

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Historical revisionism drives dislike, but I'm not a fan of that.

It has been a trend in several gaming fandom circles (The Legend of Zelda, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Pokémon; the last of those being today's topic) where there is a cycle of love-hate relationships with old games and new games. A game might be disliked at release and then appreciated later... or the other way around. In Pokémon Pearl and Pokémon Diamond's case when they released on the Nintendo DS in 2006–2007 (back before the world all got games at the same time, Japan got it in 2006), the games were almost universally acclaimed by game critics and normal fans alike. They were proclaimed to be the best mainline Pokémon RPG up to that point, though with some imperfections.

And then... something happened many years later, and fans were turning on Diamond and Pearl. Even worse, it was as if all of that praise never happened. It's like all of the fans had learned Toxic. But I won't let what they say undo how much I liked Sinnoh at the time, and much moreso than the games that came before it. And having played Pokémon Shining Pearl, it's still my favourite mainline Pokémon game of the generation.

I very recently wrote an article comparing the sour fan reception to Shining Pearl plus Brilliant Diamond to the much more glowing fan reception of Advance Wars 1+2: Re-Boot Camp, despite their similar faithful remaster philosophies. I've went back and did some research using the Wayback Machine on what was actually said, at the time of release and slightly after, about Pokémon Diamond and Pokémon Pearl, and I'm going to share that information with you all and what Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl changed or kept the same compared to that feedback.

Thursday, June 8, 2023

Devolver Direct 2023: The Return of Volvy Reaction


There were several videogame presentations that happened today, but the only one I'm going to give attention to was Devolver Digital's often entertaining Devolver Directs. This also marks the first reaction log of June 2023! (But it won't be the last.)

I didn't get to react to this LIVE as it was airing, and I'm the only staff member around for it. Well, I think that's just fine. Check out my timestamped thoughts.

[7:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
[7:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Will be watching in 5 minutes.
[7:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Personally, I think it's good that Volvy is coming back.
[7:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...
[7:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Though I wonder if they'll make his legacy worse like they did A Boy And His Blob.
[7:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Simpsons got Rat Boy (niño rata) from Volvy's design but with Bart Simpson elements.
[7:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And that's all I have to say before it starts.
[8:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright, starting.

Wednesday, June 7, 2023

Splatoon 3's Challenges Mode CAN Be Fun!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It depends what the challenge is.

One of the new things introduced in Splatoon 3's version 4 Sizzle Season 2023, and perhaps the most important thing, are Challenges. I wasn't able to write about Challenges when the new season became live, because they didn't start yet. However, the first Challenge, New Season Challenge, began on June 3. Challenges so far last in three rotations (with a Splatoon rotation being only two hours) total, and the times of these are spaced eight hours apart at inconvenient times. In North America, it means late at night, when you should be getting ready to go to work (or are still asleep), and then during work hours.

Splatoon 3 New Season Challenge Sizzle 2023 Barnacle & Dime description
The theme of this challenge is that no one has experience with Barnacle & Dime, so we can all play it for hours on end and HATE IT together!
This probably means they'll repeat this Challenge at the start of the next season in three months, huh...

The New Season Challenge was dreadful. The rules are that it's just a normal Turf War, but it's only on the two new-to-Splatoon 3 stages: Humpback Pump Track and Barnacle & Dime. Sub-abilities also won't work, meaning only your clothing's Primary abilities are of any use. In other words, it's a bad Turf War rotation that you might avoid, because Barnacle & Dime is a truly bad stage where if you lose the first fight for the middle of the stage, you're pretty much going to be spawn-camped for the rest of the match because your spawn area doesn't have the geography needed to push the invaders out. There are two incentives to play a Challenge instead of play the still-available Turf War or Anarchy ranked modes:

Tuesday, June 6, 2023

Does Nintendo Want Us To Know What Everybody 1-2-Switch! Is?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - From its reported backstory, it seems like Nobody 1-2-Switch.

Do you remember Nintendo's Nintendo Switch launch title 1-2-Switch? Not that many people bought it for a casual launch title that was supposed to prove the value of the console and its new control scheme. Even Nintendo Land on the Wii U sold 5.21 million copies versus 1-2-Switch (3.63 million at my last count), despite the Switch outselling the Wii U nearly 10:1. (Note: Nintendo Land was bundled with the Wii U for a limited time in limited circumstances, while 1-2-Switch was not. 1-2-Switch was also $50, while for some time, Nintendo Land MSRP'd at $60 but later $30.)

While 1-2-Switch didn't sell as much as Nintendo might have wanted, and its critical and fan reception was severely negative, someone at Nintendo apparently thought they oughta make a sequel. And so... Everybody 1-2-Switch. But it was announced in... a tweet. Not even a trailer or anything, and it's a tweet that omits any details on what the game is:

The page is abysmal. Besides that key art, this is the only photo, which isn't very informative or enticing at all:

Monday, June 5, 2023

Nintendo Live 2023 WILL Have Super Smash Bros. Ultimate!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Unfortunately, it's a terrible way.

We saw Nintendo Live 2023 introduced a couple of months ago as a Seattle-based four-day event “featuring videogames to play, a live stage with performances and acts, photo opportunities in the Nintendo-themed environment, and competitive tournaments.” (Note there won't be product announcements.) All of those things are still true. We then learned that access to Nintendo Live 2023 is based on a lottery system, which is terrible. But not only is it an RNG-based mission to get access, but you'll only get access for one day, and you only have the chance to win one ticket. It's not something you can plan ahead for, at least not cost-efficiently.

But you CAN try to plan around picking which day you can try to win access to, because Nintendo has revealed that not only is registration open now, but they've said what happens on each day. And most importantly, I was partially too hasty when I previously wrote, “I think if they won't do a tournament for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate with Nintendo Live, they are never going to sponsor another Super Smash Bros. Ultimate tournament ever again. Rest in peace.”

Yes, Super Smash Bros. Ultimate will have not one, but TWO events during Nintendo Live: One on September 1 (Friday) and the other on September 3 (Sunday). But both are...uh... non-traditional.

Friday, June 2, 2023

Disgraced Game Developer Yuji Naka Faces Guilty Verdict, 2.5 Years in Prison, and 1.24 million USD in Fines

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I'm satisfied.

Quick recap of my favourite story of 2022–2023: Yuji Naka, who is the bad game director behind mega-flop BALAN WONDERWORLD (regrettably published by SQUARE ENIX) and an ex-member of the Sonic Team, was arrested in November for insider trading he did while at SQUARE ENIX based on privileged information that Aiming Inc. would be the developer of Dragon Quest Tact. Then Yuji Naka was arrested a few weeks later in December because investigators found out he also insider-traded shares of Ateam Inc. based on their development of the upcoming FINAL FANTASY VII: The First Soldier.

Basically, those games existing are big deals and big breaks for those developers because they're based on big brands, and if you know who the game's developer is before it's announced, you can buy a bunch of shares pre-announcement while the share price is low, and then sell after the price pops up once their involvement in the highly anticipated games is made known.

GameStop pre-owned used BALAN WONDERWORLD prices 2023 PlayStation Xbox Nintendo Switch
I actually saw BALAN WONDERWORLD displayed at a GameStop earlier this week for $20 USD.
Digitally, it sells for $40 USD. But I also guess GameStop has a whole bunch of used/pre-owned BALAN WONDERWORLD inventory they want to get rid of for bargain bin prices.
They might as well put those copies in a landfill like it's E.T. all over again.
(By the way, I bought Kirby's Return to Dream Land Deluxe while shopping. See? I did follow up.)

Yuji Naka couldn't cut it as a game director in the modern era, so he tried using his access to confidential SQUARE ENIX information as his way to get ahead in life. He didn't have a real defence for himself, and he already confessed in court to the facts described above. So, where does that leave the judge?

Thursday, June 1, 2023

KoopaTV's May 2023 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's the second-to-last one of these newsletters.

Let us dive into headlines and I'll spare you the introductory paragraph.

KoopaTV's End of Content Notice

I hope you haven't missed this notice published on KoopaTV's 10-year anniversary. Unlike most of the other years where we just pat ourselves on the shell, this anniversary article provided valuable information: KoopaTV will stop publishing new content after July 3, 2023 (which will be the June 2023 review newsletter linked at the bottom of this very article once it exists). For reasoning on why, read that article and then come back here.

Top Five Recommended Experiences of May 2023

This was a very tough thing to just pick only FIVE of the MANY amazing KoopaTV articles published in May 2023. Here is my chronologically ordered attempt:
  1. True, the Advance Wars Trilogy's Story isn't Serious — FAKE NEWS Kotaku evaluated Advance Wars 1+2: Re-Boot Camp based on something it wasn't trying to be. In fairness to them (and because it's an issue KoopaTV cares about), we evaluated their evaluation.
  2. KoopaTV's Failed Attempt at Building THE MIGHTY BOWSER — Ludwig and Witch Princess attempted to build the LEGO set The Mighty Bowser in front of the Koopa King himself. As our review reveals, it didn't work out as planned.
  3. The Surprising Similarities Between Sticker Star and Breath of the WildThe Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild was built on the foundation that Paper Mario: Sticker Star created. This article goes into great depth about it.
  4. The Mighty Bowser VERSUS The Bootleg Bowser — This meme-filled article compares the costly but high-quality The Mighty Bowser LEGO set with the cheaper but bootlegged Bowser brick sets you can buy online.
  5. Ash Ketchum Failed His Torterra as a Pokémon Trainer — For KoopaTV's final World Turtle Day article, we discuss that twerp Ash Ketchum and how he was a terrible Pokémon Trainer for his Torkoal, Grotle, and Torterra.

Everything on KoopaTV is worth reading! Even if it's not in this top five (or prior newsletters’ top fives), you ought to still check it out!