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Friday, June 14, 2019

Phoenix Wright vs. E3 2019: Drugs, Detainment, and Discounts

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - How I met Phoenix Wright for the first time, and ruined E3 2019.

If you are a regular reader of KoopaTV, you are probably wondering where I've been during the past several days of E3 Weeks 2019. Don't worry, the other KoopaTV staffers are wondering the same thing.

And if you're an irregular reader, you might be wondering why a gaming site's coverage of the Electronic Entertainment Expo, the biggest gaming event of the year with the most impactful news drop, was so... lacking this year.

It was all foretold before E3 began that KoopaTV's staff would be flying out to Los Angeles to look for Phoenix Wright, former ace attorney and now just a disbarred and struggling man. Coverage of E3 itself was a secondary consideration.

I managed to do it. I found Phoenix Wright. I talked with Phoenix Wright. I acted on behalf of Phoenix Wright. I'll tell you the full story of what happened this week. ...You'll find it quite interesting. I'll write it from a third-person perspective, similar to the How Team Koopa Escaped Rio series.

Thursday, June 13, 2019

Your Majesty and My Majesty: Unicorns vs. Narwhals Splatfest!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Let's keep the word majesty meaningful.

You may be thinking, “Ludwig, why are you publishing about a Splatoon 2 Splatfest during E3 Weeks 2019?” Because I have no choice and Nintendo decided to have a Splatfest happen right when E3 ends. I have to write and publish coverage of this at some point before the 15th, so I picked Thursday, the designated Nintendo Treehouse Live: Indie Game Edition day. No one's going to whine for us not covering that, right?

This month's Splatfest is about two horned mythical/rare creatures: The unicorn and the narwhal.

Splatoon 2 Splatfest news more majestic creature Unicorn vs. Narwhal
Which creature is more majestic? The unicorn or the narwhal?

I had to do a lot of research for this Splatfest. You see, Pearl and Marina spent a lot of time discussing not the majestic attributes of the unicorn or the narwhal, but whether or not they exist. Allegedly, unicorns don't exist but narwhals do. Marina went into a tangent about how her landlord is a narwhal. Really uninformative banter from them overall that I had to supplement.

In my world, there is no such thing as a unicorn and there is no such thing as a narwhal. There's some ancient and non-living depictions of unicorn-like figures that signify they may have once existed (in the flesh or in someone's minds). By comparison, there's literally no mention of narwhals in the entire history of Koopa Kingdom, the Mushroom Kingdom, or anywhere else in Star World.

Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Nintendo Treehouse: Live @ E3 2019 Day 2: I AM ERROR

By KAMEK - Error.

I AM ERROR Nintendo Treehouse Live E3 2019 The Legend of Zelda II Adventure of Link

Boss isn't even around for what Nintendo is doing with E3. The staff tried to watch Nintendo Treehouse: Live, got an error, and called it a day.

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Nintendo Direct at E3 2019: KoopaTV's Live Reactions!

By WITCH PRINCESS - Time to awaken and react.

I  am back from a long slumber for this special occasion. And I'm also one of the staff members excited for this E3 2019 Direct!

Unfortunately, Ludwig went out on a search for Mr. Phoenix Wright, still hoping to get him here at E3 with us. Seriously, hope and pray that we find him! Wright needs to be in Smash!

I'll be covering Nintendo's thing, along with our good friend Ryu, RawkHawk2010 (towards the end), and Wendy (also towards the end).

Let's begin!

Monday, June 10, 2019

Square Enix E3 2019 Press Conference: KoopaTV's Live Reactions!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Finally, good things from this E3.

This E3 so far, despite wiping out some deadweight conferences from companies we don't like, hasn't been all that great.

Tonight, we placed our hopes in Square Enix to save E3 2019, which is historically a risky proposition. Here joining me (hi I was out during the day and will keep being out for the rest for BUSINESS) are RawkHawk2010, Wendy O. Koopa (for the first and probably only time this E3) and non-staffer Ryu. Note how Wendy and Ryu state at the start that they can't stick around for the conference...

You should also check out the entire E3 2019 schedule here.

[5:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa:


[5:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Classic Final Fantasy music.

[5:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Already great sign.

[5:52 PM] RawkHawk2010: Uh

[5:53 PM] Ryu: FFV music

[5:53 PM] Ryu: The only FFV song people remember

[5:53 PM] RawkHawk2010: Let's not act like Battle at the Big Bridge isn't a meh song.

[5:53 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's great.

[5:53 PM] Sooper Sekrit Agent Wendy: Dude, doing Battle on the Big Bridge is freaking amazing

Sunday, June 9, 2019

Bethesda Conference and Devolver Direct: E3 2019 Live Reactions


Let's end E3 2019's Sunday with a conference dedicated to a screwed up audience and fanbase at Bethesda, and a pseudo-conference created by a screwed up marketing team at Devolver Digital. That's not to say Bethesda doesn't have weird staff members—most the article pictures are dedicated to them. This is also the last day of E3 Weeks 2019 that I'll be available for all of the days proceedings. I have business to take care of.

Hopefully the other staffers pick up the slack. 

And for the other staffers on this log, there's RawkHawk2010. ...And there's Ryu (mostly on the Bethesda log) who isn't a staffer but has the unique privilege of hanging out with us since we've known him for over 15 years. Click here to jump right to the Devolver section. (It's much shorter.)

[5:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: @everyone

Bethesda and then Devolver Digital now

[5:30 PM] RawkHawk2010: :koopa_koot:

[5:31 PM] RawkHawk2010: At least I have alcohol.

[5:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I already finished all  my milk.

Microsoft E3 2019 Press Conference: KoopaTV's Live Reactions!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - People didn't let FAKE NEWS set their expectations for this, right?

There was a lot of dubious information and idiotic expectations entering into this Microsoft E3 2019. Let's be clear from the start what will be here: A lot of world premiere games for Xbox One (and PC) and a lot of Xbox Game Pass information.

Here to provide live reactions on the KoopaTV side for this E3 2019 are myself, RawkHawk2010, and not-a-KoopaTV-staffer Ryu. And, for the first time ever, there's part of the reaction log BEFORE the page break, because I don't actually have much to stay for this introduction section. Enjoy:

[12:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: @everyone

It's time for Microsoft's E3, perhaps the most consequential of the whole conference?

[12:58 PM] RawkHawk2010:

[12:58 PM] Ryu: Rawk got the better link

[12:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Aright.

[12:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: I's ready.

[12:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: My body isn't ready.

[12:59 PM] Ryu: closes Twitch chat

[12:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: I'm actually optimistic.

[12:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: Not even scared.

[1:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: IT BEGINS.

Saturday, June 8, 2019

Three Nintendo Tournaments Day: E3 2019 Live Reactions

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Featuring Super Mario Maker 2, Splatoon 2, and Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.

This one reaction log will cover the entirety of Saturday's E3 2019 events—sorry EA, you get nothing. We're talking about the Super Mario Maker 2 Invitational 2019, the Splatoon 2 World Championship 2019, and the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate World Championship 2019 3v3. Lots of worldly things here.

KoopaTV's staff itself is in Los Angeles (but not in The Theatre at Ace Hotel where these tournaments take place), and the vast majority of this reaction log is just me. RawkHawk2010 is here too. Ryu, who isn't part of the staff and is just a friend, isn't in Los Angeles but does sometimes appear in the log.

Click here to skip down to the Splatoon 2 part of the log. Click here to skip down to the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate part of the log.

Friday, June 7, 2019

E3 Weeks 2019 Schedule!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Your index for KoopaTV E3 2019 coverage.

First of all, congratulations. We've made it. It's now time for a new Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) for the year 2019. This is the videogame industry's biggest conference, put together by the Entertainment Software Association. The major gaming companies come from worldwide to show off what they're up to, and KoopaTV is right there with them.

This year, if you haven't read, is the first time that KoopaTV's staff is physically present in Los Angeles during E3. However, our mission at Los Angeles isn't just to attend E3, but to find and bring a special someone there.

With that said, here is our E3 Weeks 2019 logo:

KoopaTV E3 Weeks 2019 logo Electronic Entertainment Expo Hobo Phoenix Wright hat
This year's KoopaTV E3 Weeks (2019) logo was conceived and created by RawkHawk2010.
If you have any comments, questions, or concerns about it, ask him. ...He'll probably avoid answering.

If you want to watch everything that happens as it happens, I suggest and

Here is what will happen this year, in Eastern Time. Note that just because an event is listed here does not mean that KoopaTV will provide dedicated coverage to it. This year, we're committing to nothing:

Thursday, June 6, 2019

KoopaTV Staff to Fly to Los Angeles During E3 2019... To Find Phoenix Wright

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Tradition-breaking, but for an incredibly worthy cause.

You may have been wondering about the obvious lack of pre-E3 hype on for 2019. Everything has been going according to tradition, even the presence of the annual pre-E3 tragedy. It's not like the lack of Sony and Electronic Arts participation at E3 2019 would have us bothered, since we consistently aren't fans of their conferences.

So what is it? Well, it's because we knew the whole time that the Electronic Entertainment Expo wouldn't be our main focus during E3 Weeks 2019. Long-time readers know that every year of our existence (that's SIX years now) we've been supplying award-losing coverage of all of the major (and sometimes minor) company conferences at E3, supplemented by dedicated Nintendo Treehouse Live reaction logs. Essentially, we dedicated our lives so we didn't miss a moment of activity, and all of it was documented on the website. It was very popular with the search engines, too.

What are we doing instead? The whole KoopaTV staff is going to Los Angeles, which is where E3 has been based for a while now. But we're not going to the Los Angeles Convention Center.  No, we're going to search the streets of Los Angeles for disgraced and disbarred former attorney Phoenix Wright.

Wednesday, June 5, 2019

Pokémon Sword/Shield June Direct: Galar Legends, Dynamax, the Wild Area

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - A lot of the February criticisms got invalidated.

True story: I woke up early just to get to my day job early enough that I could watch today's Pokémon Direct presented by GAME FREAK... live! And live-react to it. Unfortunately, the live-reaction log doesn't pass basic KoopaTV quality standards, so I'm going to spend much more time and effort doing a full write-up for you. Aren't you lucky?

Here's the video-on-demand of the “roughly 15 minutes of information” that's approaching 17 minutes. That means there's plenty of footage in this that is strictly uninformative. Fortunately, the additional information found on the official website makes up for this.


There's surprisingly a lot to talk about here, and I just want to remind everyone of when we first saw Pokémon Sword and Pokémon Shield back in February, and of the comments people made back then.

I recommend you skip ahead to exactly three minutes in to skip some bad lyrics.

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Government Regulation of Pay-to-Win and Loot Boxes: Good Idea Or No?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I read the proposed bill and I'll share my informed opinion.

At the start of May, Senator Josh Hawley of Missouri (Republican) said he would introduce a bill to the United States Senate to regulate loot boxes and pay-to-win micro-transactions in the videogame industry. I didn't comment on it because the bill didn't exist yet. I won't write an article about a bill before the lawmakers bother to write the bill itself. Now it's written, and you can read the full text of the proposed legislation here (while he's still in office) and check out its progress through the legislative process here.

The bill is already co-sponsored by fellow Senators Richard Blumenthal (Democrat of Connecticut) and Ed Markey (Democrat of Massachusetts) and is now sitting in the Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transportation. Who knows where it'll go from there, but the United States's gaming industry lobby, the Entertainment Software Association, is too busy making public statements disagreeing about gaming addiction's existence (which I need to write a new article about now that it's officially a thing) and organising the Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) to meaningfully impede the bill's direction.

When I think of the United States Senate trying to regulate videogames, I think of Hillary Clinton's failed attempt trying to pass the Family Entertainment Protection Act in 2005, which, after examining the bill closely like I did, would have created a very different—and much worse—videogame industry compared to today had it passed back then.

How does “A bill to regulate certain pay-to-win microtransactions and sales of loot boxes in interactive digital entertainment products, and for other purposes.” fare under scrutiny? Let's find out together with my awesome analysis. The bill has five sections, so that's how I'll organise my article.

Monday, June 3, 2019

KoopaTV's May 2019 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - A month full of annual features and fun! And a feature improvement.

I know that in the gaming industry, people want to dedicate June to upcoming very important gaming conferences. Well, I want to take a day out of June to write about the month of May. May—despite us sometimes writing it as “March”—is important to KoopaTV. You'll see why as the post progresses, but it's all about the content. Let's get right into it.

The Top 5 Recommended KoopaTV Experiences of May 2019

Content matters, so here are the top five recommended KoopaTV experiences of May 2019. In chronological order! Even if it's not on this list, you should still check out every article from May 2019... and on the website in general. That's six years worth of content, but... you'll get a lot out of it.
  1. KoopaTV's Crabby Six-Year Anniversary  — KoopaTV opened May 12, 2013 to no acclaim whatsoever. We've come a long way since then, and KoopaTV has developed to the point of being very crab-like. We explain what exactly that means in this epic anniversary article.
  2. Super Silly Superpower Splatfest: Time Travel vs. Teleportation! — The May 2019 Splatfest pit Time Travel and Teleportation against one another, and based on KoopaTV's previously-stated thoughts on time travel (like long-time Daylight Saving Time opposition), Ludwig wrote about why you needed to support Team Transportation.
  3. Ace Attorney Isn't an RPG, but You Can Buy It at 50–70% off for CAPCOM Publisher Sale 2019! — Usually, when KoopaTV writes an Ace Attorney-is-on-sale article, we don't go into deep detail on Ace Attorney in terms of gameplay. But the Nintendo eShop prominently declares the franchise as role-playing games, so that's definitely something we needed to address.
  4. Democrats on Fox News Town Halls: Buttigieg vs. Warren — Not really game-related, but there's philosophy around Democrat candidates and their willingness to engage in what they consider “opposition media” like Fox News or KoopaTV, and that's foreshadowing future KoopaTV coverage of the 2020 presidential campaign. It's foreshadowing you need to read!
  5. Memorial to Durable Product Quality; They Don't Make 'Em Like They Used To — KoopaTV's Memorial Day 2019 article, discussing product quality that's falling apart across the industries, including consumer electronics (and gaming hardware).