Nintendo Switch Online Perception: One Year Later

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's not a time for celebration.

I don't care for or appreciate anniversaries. I wouldn't have noticed that Nintendo Switch Online has turned one year old today if Nintendo didn't send me an e-mail last week with the subject line, “It’s almost the 1-year anniversary of Nintendo Switch Online!” The call to action was “Check out all of the membership plans.”

Excuse me? You already know I know the membership plans, since I already have a Nintendo Switch Online subscription—I administer a whole Family Group. I even recently renewed it. 

And they sure seem to know that I'm using the online functionality. What, do they want me to just abandon my Family Group:

It's Mario with a party popper. He's the face of Nintendo Switch Online.
...Told you he's evil.

 
It's interesting that Nintendo is seeing this as a celebratory moment—bringing out a Mario party for it. For the whole year Nintendo Switch Online has been around, and the long build-up to it, it's been seen as a reviled monstrosity with massive dislikes on any YouTube video Nintendo uploads dedicated to it. A year ago, KoopaTV published a widely-circulated article documenting that, as well as methods to convince Nintendo to change Nintendo Switch Online to something of more value.

Meet Sirfetch’d in Pokémon Sword!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Hi Sirfetch'd. I'm Ludwig. Are you okay in the head?

Earlier this week, The Pokémon Company International (TPCI) was hacked by a Rotom. Here's what their website looked like while the hack was going on. It appears Rotom went into the Cascading Style Sheets (CSS—used to make websites stylish) and added a “data-scramble” element. While data breaches should sink any company's reputation and invite a class-action lawsuit, The Pokémon Company International dismissed the concern and went on to reveal a new Pokémon exclusive to Pokémon Sword.

...Seriously, they didn't even say if anyone's information got taken. What kind of transparency is that? Unacceptable. The CSS element has since been removed from the .css file, which I guess means they really did purge Rotom completely. ...Oh, right, reveal:

Meet Sirfetch'd, the evolved form of Farfetch'd that reside in the Galar region—no Galarian-specific look to Farfetch'd has been identified. That video thumbnail is as smug as TPCI's reaction to being hacked. Sirfetch'd is all about surviving many battles, being an honourable and noble knight, and using its leek as a lance. ...Which isn't a sword.

GameStop, Gaming Cultural Hubs, and Love

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - That headline is strictly hypothetical. (For now.)

Physical gaming retailer GameStop has been in big trouble. Their stock price is a disaster—it's fallen over 70% in the past year. They've cancelled their famously-generous dividend. Sales are declining year-over-year, as the gaming industry is embracing trends like streaming and digital purchases, which leaves GameStop, which derives most of their profit from selling (used) physical games, out. (Their collectibles business is doing well and I'm helping to contribute, and more on the importance of that in a moment.)

GameStop, looking to reverse their downturn, is seeking alternatives. Their GameTrust publishing unit is obviously a disaster. They haven't published anything since 2017, and the one remaining game they have, Star Child, hasn't had an update from their developer, Playful Studios, since 2018 where they apologised for accidentally cancelling people's pre-orders but promised the game is still being worked on. Not a good sign.

GameStop has presented these strategic pillars in their recent investors call, and I'd like to focus on the second one for the rest of this article:

“Our strategic plan is anchored on 4 key tenets: one, optimize core business by improving efficiency and effectiveness in everything we do; two, create a social and cultural hub of gaming within each GameStop store and online; three, build compelling digital capability to reach our customers wherever they want to do business and give them the full spectrum of content and access to the products they're looking for; and four, transform our vendor and partner relationships, unlocking additional high-margin revenue streams and optimizing the lifetime value of every customer.” [Emphasis added]

Rawk's Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice Experience

By RAWKHAWK2010 - Enjoy my hawk swan song.

I decided early on in the year that this would be my final article on KoopaTV. I've also chosen to compile this days before Tokyo Game Show 2019 so that it can be published following one of two scenarios: One being the announcement of a new Ace Attorney in which case hey, perfect timing! The other (aka the one which will actually happen) being a Capcom TGS showing that was even more missable than their last, where thereafter I will resign to the fact that the next non-port Ace Attorney will release long after we're all dead. And what's that you say? That I might should stick around at least until after it's confirmed Phoenix Wright won't round off the five Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Challenger Pack fighters? Well, I don't think that'll be happening. Even when we start getting into the additional (presumably still third-party) DLC fighters who weren't originally promised, it's being made clearer by the day that one's importance to Nintendo's history really, really doesn't matter. If you're more likely to get onto Ultimate's roster just by being an ambassador for a company who had their own console, despite the fact that your name is "Terry Bogard" which the vast majority of Nintendo fans had never heard uttered in their lives, then Ys's Adol Christin (who would represent one of the oldest Action JRPG developers/publishers still in existence today) may have less obstacles to overcome than I originally thought. (Hell, after the last Direct I'll be surprised if Phoenix makes it into Ultimate before Deadly Premonition's Agent Francis York Morgan. And it says a lot when I'm only slightly kidding.)

I suppose Capcom could be planning an anime adaptation of the second trilogy to precede a second port collection, but for all we know they've scheduled it with Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney's seven-year timeskip in mind so that in-universe game and real-world anime dates can once again approximately overlap. Well I'm not waiting for that shit!

As for why I'd choose this to be my parting article as opposed to something else, it's simultaneously the conclusion and crescendo of my Ace Attorney Experience, spanning across 200 Miiverse posts (while the first three entries included 38, 32, and 87 respectively), meaning there's pretty much a nonexistent chance that anything both this ambitious and relevant to the site's interests would ever be published by me again. As a bonus, I'm also uploading my Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Experience -- technically both my first and last time documenting an Ace Attorney game on Miiverse, due to me starting and abandoning the game earlier in the decade and then later salvaging my playthrough following 2017's mainline marathon. (I was probably motivated both by the fact that I actually cared about Maya Fey unlike before and because Miiverse was set to go offline in a little over a month.) Think of it as both a prelude and a postscript.

Now then...let the finale commence.

Ed: There's obviously spoilers for both Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney − Spirit of Justice and Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney ahead. You've been warned.
Click here to jump to the Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney bonus section.

September 12 2019 Democrat Presidential Primary Debate 3 ANALYSIS!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Her presence is missed...

Last night from 8 PM Eastern to almost 11 PM, ten Democrat candidates for President of the United States debated their positions on ABC (with some idiot from Univision thrown in for bad measure), vying to be the last person standing to get the opportunity to take down incumbent President Donald John Trump. The Democratic National Committee imposed arbitrary rules (that everyone DID agree to beforehand, though) that ended up excluding the best candidate that Democrats have to offer. (And that hyperlink is meant to point to the second paragraph that is about Tulsi Gabbard, not the rest of the article about John Delaney.) She's still running, so we might see her in the October debate.

But for now, we saw (in order of their stage podiums) Amy Klobuchar, Cory Booker, Pete Buttigieg, Bernie Sanders, Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, Andrew Yang, Beto O'Rourke, and Julián Castro. I'm choosing not to give a section to each candidate this time like in the second debate (part one and part two) or the first debate (part one and part two). (You can see the whole index of who these people are over here.)

You can watch the entire debate for yourself here (ABC won't let me embed it to this article page) but I don't recommend that, out of respect for your time and sanity.

Speaking of time, here were the talking times for all the candidates as compiled by NPR:

No one is surprised that Andrew Yang got the least speaking time for the third debate in a row, right?

Ring Fit Adventure Is Conceptually BRILLIANT—Hope It Doesn't Screw Up...

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Vintage Nintendo creativity.

I am pretty proud to be a Nintendo fan right now. After last week's Nintendo Direct that I found quite despairing—with great fear that everything Nintendo puts out will just be overshadowed by Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (even if it doesn't deserve that)—I wasn't anticipating today's announcement to be anything more than a filler article. You know, the one teased last week about the Hoop peripheral with people moving ridiculously on a global scale.

Then you look at the thumbnail for today's announcement, and there's really nothing encouraging about...this:

But then you watch it, and you ignore the creepy presenters, and just focus on the game and the ideas presented in there, and if you're like me, you'll quickly come to the conclusion that Nintendo is onto something brilliant and their teaser was just doing a tremendous disservice. (Actually, if you rewatch the trailer from last week given what we know now, some of that STILL don't make sense. It never will.)

The hoop and the leg strap are called the Ring-Con and Leg Strap accessories, and you insert your Joy-Con in them to control your character in Ring Fit Adventure, a new adventure game (of the RPG variety, not of the visual novel variety—though some confuse the two) releasing to the Nintendo Switch on October 18.

Pokémon Sword/Shield: Ghost Tea and Non-Miltank Sausage Rice

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - #NeverForget the Vegetarian option.

During last week's Nintendo Direct, there was a section dedicated to Pokémon Sword and Pokémon Shield, which makes sense, since they promised news on those games for that Direct prior to it happening. Here's the trailer they showed, featuring some upbeat music:

The total news release included many tidbits of information, including “Surprise Trading”, Pokémon camping, Alcremie whipped cream flavours, custom business cards called League Cards, two new Pokémon, and shelling out in-game cash for even more trainer customisation than previous generations, including the ability to see what haircuts will look like before getting them.

I'll write about two of these topics, because they're the two that I can make topical tangents to:

Pocket Card Jockey Staff Credits

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - No one else is doing it...

Once upon a time, GAME FREAK released a quirky, small game (and a free demo that's still available and transfers your progress to the full game) on the Nintendo 3DS eShop called Pocket Card Jockey. Quite frankly, KoopaTV has been the best place to get information on Pocket Card Jockey because it's just been ignored in most other places. See KoopaTV's article on Pocket Card Jockey's game mechanics here and an article on Pocket Card Jockey's time-attack records here.

As for those other places, even something as basic as the Pocket Card Jockey staff credits is... currently not posted anywhere on the Internet. It's not on Giant Bomb. It's not on the Internet Gaming Database. It's not on Metacritic/GameFAQs. MobyGames doesn't have the credits either. Those sites (besides MobyGames) all have designated pages on their sites for where the credits would go... but those pages have no content on them. (Metacritic and Giant Bomb do still have advertisements, however.)

There's a current controversy going on now with GAME FREAK and how they staff their projects, with some misguided armchair game producers believing that GAME FREAK is somehow prioritising (from a resource standpoint) the team that works on non-Pokémon projects over the Pokémon team. That's just wrong, but since no one's posted the credits for games that team has made, like Pocket Card Jockey, no one really knows what's right. Just look at the dislike bar on Little Town Hero's September Nintendo Direct trailer. (And all the negative comments due to Pokémon fans.)

KoopaTV is going to change that. Here are the full credits to Pocket Card Jockey:

Sign-up for the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open September 2019!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Now featuring Québec.

In a very surprise announcement—even to me, and I'm an insider—Nintendo and Battlefy are teaming up once again, this time with the esteemed The Big House super major based in Michigan. The four top placers in the newly-announced Super Smash Bros. Ultimate North American Online Open September 2019—taking place September 21—will get free tickets to Detroit to participate in the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate singles bracket at The Big House 9—taking place the weekend of October 4.

You can register for the event here.

KoopaTV readers know that less than a month ago, I wrote about the August version of the Battlefy-Nintendo tournament series (featuring many useful tips and information that is still applicable and relevant), which featured the prize of going to the October Nintendo Live tournament in Japan. What's different about the tournament this time?

1. Nintendo's lawyers finally are allowing players in Québec to participate (as part of Region 7)
1. Puerto Rico and other US territories still excluded
2. The prize for going to Detroit is valued much less than going to Kyoto. Plane tickets are cheaper and the lodging is for less days, but more importantly, you only win a $350 Visa gift card and not a $450 gift card
3. There is no Grand Finals round this time to determine the order of the top 4; all 4 top-placers are going to Detroit
4. Battlefy as a platform is substantially more stable and robust with its server redundancy than in August, though note that's not the same as the stability of your own personal Internet connection (or your would-be opponents’)

How should you practice for the tournament? I wrote an article compiling all of the fighter usage stats from the August tournament here, and that article has a spreadsheet breaking down fighter usage stats per your specific region—and yes, there are substantial regional differences besides Joker being #1 everywhere. Since it's the same player base, you should expect very similar usage. One note: given recent events, you should anticipate adding Banjo and Mii Gunner to the list of most-used characters (Joker, Hero, Link) and train in those match-ups.

You should also try practicing playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for four hours in a row, because unless you get a very good win record early on (such as winning your first eleven games), you're going to have to play the ladder round the whole time to get a chance of getting into your region's top 32. Specific tips on doing that are back in that August article.

At least it's generic Mii Gunner in the mural and not... him...

Ludwig, of course, will be participating once again, as the member of the media in residence for this series of tournaments. He wants to gain confidence in winning with his other characters that aren't his father, since for someone who mains four characters, he relied mostly on Lord Bowser for his matches. Ludwig is glad he wrote the August article so comprehensively, because it means this article is pretty easy to write.

Nintendo Teases a Hoop-esque “new experience for Nintendo Switch”

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I guess we'll find out whether it's something to be afraid of in a week.

I might still be obligated to talk about information from that Nintendo Direct earlier this week, but I'd actually like to move on from that for now. (I'm still in a bad mood.)

As a jerk has repeated many, many times, “let it go, and move on.” 

Nintendo already wants to move on... to as far as next week. In what is unprecedented, at least in my memory, they made a teaser video to tease an announcement of a new product anouncement... WITHOUT giving it a name or describing what it is. Nintendo usually is quick to announce what something is, instead of teasing a mystery ahead of time with a whole video. The closest thing that I can think of is them announcing Metroid Prime 4 with only a 4 in artwork, but even there, they announced (and then indefinitely delayed) that it's Metroid Prime 4. That's all Nintendo fans needed to know, and that's way more information than what we got for...this...thing.

Take a watch, if you dare:

I don't know what Nintendo wants me to feel from this announcement besides “cringe,” and that's the wrong direction my feelings are supposed to go in per the “let's move on from the bad-mood Direct” thought. The video made me feel stupid because I didn't realise they were talking in non-English languages for a while, and I thought I just had bad listening comprehension.

The product itself is two sizes of bendy exercise hoops that you insert Joy-Cons into—a wise decision, as opposed to the Nintendo Labo that is invalidated by the Nintendo Switch Lite's smaller size but still requires a Nintendo Switch inserted into it. I figure it's some kind of Joy-Con peripheral. (Note the distinction there: the Nintendo Switch Lite is compatible with Joy-Con, which are the same size regardless of what your Switch model is.)

None of the people in the video were actually playing with one another, indicating a single-player experience. It was one person with the strange hoop, and a bunch of other people in the background babbling their respective languages in weird poses with fake excitement, much akin to this. One guy yelled about doing a backflip, which could range from an exercise game to a 3D The Legend of Zelda game where you hold down on your control stick and press the A button while also pressing the Z-target button.

When in Rome, don't do what the Romans do.
...Or you'll end up on the floor with some kind of torture device fastened on you.

The video spans Paris, Madrid, Rome, San Francisco, Kyoto, and Dallas. I'm not sure what the purpose of that is other than to demonstrate (brag?) that Nintendo is in a lot of places around the world... at least, Europe, the United States, and Japan. Guess that means this thing will be sold worldwide.

Maybe I'm being too polite or indirect here. I haven't denounced the video in outraged terminology. ...I already let all of that out on Wednesday, though. And some of Thursday. I just can't be shocked or disappointed anymore. For now, I have no reason to be.

Not until next week when we figure out what this torture hoop is. I'll be judging it along the lines of, “Will it be as evil as the Nintendo Labo?” How about you? What are you expecting out of this thing?


Ludwig didn't know how to write the title of the article so it'd appear in search engines, because he has no idea what people would search for with a product with no name. Nintendo's video only has the keywords, “nintendo, video game, nintendo switch” which isn't helpful.


The new experience is called Ring Fit Adventure, and the teaser about it did a tremendous disservice to how great the concept is.