Two Great Web Tools: summarize.tech and Indie Wiki Buddy / BreezeWiki

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Never watch a video essay or suffer from a Fandom Wiki ever again.

This isn't... normally the type of thing I'd write an article on, but it's definitely adjacent to the topics we'd talk about on KoopaTV, and makes your life as a videogame fan engaged in gaming culture much better. So I'd like to share TWO tools in ONE article that are amazing, useful, and you'll want to start incorporating into your web browsing experience right away.

summarize.tech

There are lots of people out there—and they are probably correct, unfortunately—that tell me that KoopaTV shouldn't be a text-based blog. The days of most people READING things are long over. People watch and listen to people talk, influenced by “video essays” on platforms such as YouTube. I detest video essays. They're a reason I was on Team Book instead of Team Film. Video essays are inefficient at conveying information. They most often don't take advantage of the times where video is the most useful medium of conveying information, since they're more like lectures or podcasts than real videos. And because of how YouTube works, content creators make their video essays artificially lengthy, beyond the fact that it just takes longer to listen to someone talk than it is to read what they have to say.

Enter summarize.tech, a free AI-powered video summary tool powered by ChatGPT and created by Pete Hunt. You put in the URL of your YouTube video and it'll spit out a summary, with an option to see section summaries in five-minute increments, useful for very long videos.

For example, you can quickly get the plot of Mekkah's 22:29 “Fire Emblem Fandom has a Problem with Archetypes” YouTube video in a couple of minutes of reading the summary. The summary gets to the point that Mekkah is saying archetypes are useful for quickly communicating ideas, but often the fandom gets bored and tries to invent new archetypes that don't communicate anything useful, or try to force a square character into a circular archetype hole, which devalues what archetypes are trying to convey. Boom, you just saved twenty or more minutes of your day, and if you think from the timeslot detailed summary that it's worth watching the whole video, you can of course still do that.

OOPSIE WHOOPSIE, E3 2023 Is Cancelled Entirely!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - This... exact thing happened last year.

Well, if I knew that E3 2023—the Electronic Entertainment Expo of 2023—was gonna be cancelled this week, I wouldn't have written the Ubisoft quits out of E3 2023 article on Monday. But here we are, we couldn't get out of the last Thursday of March without cancelling E3 2023 altogether. Not that ReedPop or the Entertainment Software Association had much of a choice at this point, with no one important wanting to attend. Here is a notice from the official website:

On the E3 website, they have a ten-second clip from E3 2019, the last time there was a real, physical-based E3. It was a great spectacle.
(And the last time I decided to try to attend these myself, which was a complete and total disaster!)

There's something very special I want to point out: E3 actually announced directly that E3 2023 is cancelled. This is unlike when they cancelled E3 2022 a year ago, also on the last Thursday of March, where they never put out a direct statement or even updated their website, even after E3 2022 was supposed to have happened. They preferred to make statements to select members of the media, which is a troubling practice in an era of rampant FAKE NEWS by those same members of the media. That means I'm pleased that they've finally done the right thing and told us this. Took their second demise in two years to do so. Remember, it was also cancelled in E3 2020, so the last time an E3 took place was E3 2021, which was an all-virtual event.

So in the past four years, there was one E3 and three cancellations. That's an abysmal track record, and that's why the ESA is finally saying things like they are re-evaluating E3's future. At this point, and this is rough to say as a big defender of E3 long after it's stopped being popular to be one, but perhaps E3's best future is to not have a future. But you know what also shouldn't exist?

Wii U and 3DS eShops are GONE, but now you can See the Story of Rusty's Real Deal Baseball for Free

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - No more micro-transactions! Or macro-transactions, either.

Well over a year ago, I explained and warned about how the Nintendo Wii U and Nintendo 3DS eShops would be obliterated on March 27, 2023. I didn't buy anything on the Wii U or 3DS in 2022 or 2023, since I'm not a procrastinator, and if I had wanted something, I would've gotten it a long, long time ago.

Apparently, the world is full of procrastinators and it was a scramble in March 2023 for many people to buy things they could've gotten in March 2022. To be fair, if you did wait until March 2023, in certain circumstances, you could get some big savings in sales. But now if you try to access a Nintendo 3DS game page on nintendo.com, it'll redirect to the support page for Service Discontinuation: Nintendo eShop for Nintendo 3DS. And if you try to access a page on the Wii U or 3DS eShop, it'll say it's unavailable for purchase. If you try to access a game's in-product online store, depending on the game it'll say it couldn't find any products or no products are available for purchase. Even the “My Nintendo 3DS & Wii U Memories” website no longer exists, despite it featuring on Nintendo's question and answer page on this topic.

Maybe I can still get Kirby Triple Deluxe physically.
Or never and I can be satisfied with that, since I had nine years to get it but chose not to.

It's not all bad news with no silver lining. At least one free-to-play game, Rusty's Real Deal Baseball, lets you get to the game's story ending after the 3DS eShop has shut down. This assumes you downloaded the game before it shut down, since you can't download it now. The plot of the game is that Rusty, a married father of ten pups, runs a baseball-themed sports shop of minigames, but his wife has apparently left him and his shop is falling apart. You could pay a maximum of $40 on his ten games, but you could haggle him and get discounts down to a total price of $16 for the games. That's real money for his in-game wares.

While I can't play the games, I can at least advance the story. (Which is spoiled if you keep reading.)

About Eiji Aonuma's Gameplay Demonstration of The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I see lots of people are excited, but I know for a fact I wouldn't like it if I bought it.

Today, Nintendo released an over 13-minute video of The Legend of Zelda series producer Eiji Aonuma playing The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom while commentating. It's not unedited gameplay for sure, but carefully selected and choreographed gameplay clips stitched together to showcase shiny gameplay mechanics. There are no story spoilers. (There's little evidence that there is even much of a story to spoil if The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is anything to go by.) At the beginning, Eiji Aonuma states the game has completed development, which it better, since it's coming out quite soon.

In addition, Nintendo announced a The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom-themed Nintendo Switch (OLED model). The game releases on May 12 for 70 USD ($10 more than the MSRP for a standard Nintendo Switch game), while the themed console releases on April 28 for 360 USD ($10 more than the MSRP for a standard Nintendo Switch (OLED model)). There will also be a Nintendo Switch Pro Controller to release on May 12 for 75 USD (only $5 more than the MSRP for a standard Nintendo Switch Pro Controller... a suspiciously smaller mark-up!).

As for the rest of the article, I'm going to share my thoughts on what was shown. If you're looking for a super deep breakdown of the gameplay demonstration with fan theories, you won't find that here, especially because I'm not interested enough to do that since I disliked The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild.

Whoops, Ubisoft Won't Be At E3 2023

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Don't let current events distract you from this news!

It was just a month ago how I wrote that Nintendo confirmed they wouldn't be at E3 2023... but, hey, at least Ubisoft confirmed they would be!

It's then important to note that I don't have respect for a conference where Ubisoft is the biggest name in town. But at least that's one company. Unfortunately for the Electronic Entertainment Expo 2023, they've now lost that company, according to videogame outlet VGC citing an Ubisoft spokesperson. Instead, Ubisoft will hold an “Ubisoft Forward Live event on June 12 in Los Angeles.”

That's a day before E3 2023's first “Industry Day” (June 12 is a Monday, the first Industry Day is June 13, a Tuesday). Ubisoft's live event taking place in Los Angeles, where E3 2023 will be, seems to certainly indicate that Ubisoft did actually have every intention of appearing at E3 2023, or else they wouldn't do their own event in the same city on the same week. But... something must've happened to move Ubisoft in “a different direction,” and I guess we won't know the full backstory of that at this time (or possibly ever). I figure Ubisoft has lots to show at their own event, perhaps even some of the new environmentalist propaganda games they've had several of their studios work on. But why not at E3 2023 itself?

I'm feeling mighty stupid for ever believing in E3 2023 and ReedPop's management of it. They're doing a less competent job than when the Entertainment Software Association (ESA) was directly in charge. For its part, no one associated with E3 2023 has publicly made a remark about Ubisoft's about-face, and the official E3 2023 Media Center still has the headline, “Ubisoft confirmed for E3 2023”...

Left: The E3 website's media center, linking to a February article on gamesindustry.biz about Ubisoft being confirmed.
Right: gamesindustry.biz article in March about how Ubisoft is skipping E3 2023. E3 may wish to skip featuring this article on their website.

Ludwig's thoughts on E3 2023 are little more than pity at the moment. Feel free to attempt to cheer him up with a silver lining in the comments section. He's wondering what KoopaTV will do during E3 2023 since the site is supposed to cover what is supposed to be the biggest event in videogames.


Only a few days passed and then they announced E3 2023 was cancelled altogether.

Nessie versus Aliens versus Big Foot: Bad Splatfest Idea, But We Must Pick a Side!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Only one can be real. Even though multiple are.

A new Splatfest dawns upon Splatoon 3... Here is the question:

Which of Nessie, aliens, or Bigfoot is real?
Only ONE can be real.

Asking “Which of these is real?” is the first objectively bad Splatfest question in Splatoon 3—and remember, they haven't done three-way Splatfests before Splatoon 3. In Splatoon and Splatoon 2, it was only two-option questions. Consider that the Splatfests either ask which is the best choice of three options (rock vs. paper vs. scissors or gear vs. grub vs. fun to a deserted island) or what is your favourite personal preference (grass vs. fire vs. water, or spicy vs. sweet vs. sour flavours, or dark chocolate vs. milk chocolate vs. white chocolate). You can have debates over what the best choice is, or have an opinion about, if you had to choose one thing, what your favourite option is.

But when you say only one option can be real, what do you pick if none are real? Well, the one most likely to be real? But then what do you pick if MORE THAN ONE is real? ...Uh... Which one is... the most real...? But realness, like gender, only has two options: it's real or it isn't real. But still, by the end of this article, I need to make a choice of which Splatfest team to join, so I'm going to have to figure out something or just ignore the question prompt.

Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective Gets Some of the Worst-Designed Merchandise... Ever?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Buy Ghost Trick. But not these shirts.

Apparently, today is “National Puppy Day”, and the presence of Missile the Pomeranian in Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective has gotten publisher CAPCOM to make Ghost Trick merchandise right now.

That's encouraging news. Following the CAPCOM Spotlight and the CAPCOM Publisher Sale (which is still going on, but you only have a few days left to buy the Ace Attorney games on your Nintendo 3DS for $3 each), CAPCOM put out TWO separate surveys. One asking how much you liked the Spotlight, and then one asking for feedback on their big sale. Both of these offered different wallpapers for your desktop or mobile trash device, which means their artists made a whole bunch of new artwork to accomodate all of these wallpapers. Unfortunately, BOTH wallpapers did not have any Ghost Trick characters or references, even though every other franchise from the CAPCOM Spotlight was represented. Even Exoprimal, which is a new franchise that, by definition, is less successful than Ghost Trick is due to it not coming out yet. Why omit Ghost Trick? The characters have great character designs!

Anyway, given that background, it's good that CAPCOM is putting effort to producing some Ghost Trick merchandise that you can purchase now on Amazon. They're even advertising the existence of these shirts on the Ghost Trick website. So, what does it look like? Let's see...

Tax Heaven 3000 Should Be How Tax Prep Is Done... or Eliminate Tax Prep Altogether

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I admire the thought that went behind it and want it to be real.

Millions of people have recently learned about the existence of Tax Heaven 3000, a United States income tax return preparation software dressed as a dating simulation developed by MSCHF Product Studios Inc. It... was on the Steam platform, but has now been removed. You can still try to access it from its website, taxheaven3000.com. The output, according to the terms of service, is an unreviewed and unmailed self-prepared paper federal tax return for the 2022 tax year that is not comprehensive of all possibilities, and assumes you are a single-filer without dependents. State taxes are not included.

I have seen many people remark not to trust an anime girl with your social security number.
...You can still put a fake one in and revise it later on the printed paper copy.
But why do you trust Intuit with your social security number over Iris?

For its part, MSCHF describes itself as “an art collective that engages art, fashion, tech, and capitalism. The collective subverts mass/popular culture and corporate operations as tools for critique and intervention. MSCHF, as a practice and as an entity, manifests the ambition for creative work / a creative entity to wield real tangible power (in culture; On the world stage; As measured against the cultural power held by world-straddling companies, celebrities, and media entities).” In non-pretentious language, they like to make fun of things that capitalist societies take as normal when they should be viewed more critically, such as when tax preparation software developer Intuit lobbies the government and anti-tax crusaders to keep American citizens frustrated with doing taxes, when completing it COULD be easy AND free and already calculated for you, since the government already knows that information anyway due to employer-provided information throughout the year.

I like the thought that went behind making Tax Heaven 3000, which is supposed to release on March 30, 2023 for free, though there is a collector's edition that apparently includes a body pillow. (Tax Day is April 18, 2023...) And there is an antagonistic character named Turbo who is into confusion and corporate lobbying. Unlike Iris, who appears to be a wonderful girl.

Implications of the Playing for the Planet Alliance 2022 Report (and the Green Game Jam) and its Statistical Falsehoods

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - There's some amazing (as in, it's amazing how deceptive this is) self-back-patting here. But that could affect the games you play going forward.

Do you remember KoopaTV's article on the “Playing for the Planet Alliance” back when it was made in 2019? It's an effort sponsored by the United Nations Environment Programme to get a bunch of game development companies and associations to:

1. Reduce the carbon impact of the gaming industry to zero
2. Insert environmental messages into videogames to get gamers to change their personal behaviour

At present, its members include industry heavyweights like Bandai Namco, Microsoft (and you can remember they're vocal about their green initiatives on the Xbox), Niantic, SEGA, Sony Interactive Entertainment, Ubisoft, and Unity. And before you bring up a talking point about how UN climate initiatives tend to leave big polluters alone, TiMi Studio Group (a subsidiary of Tencent Games of CHINA) is also a member. And they've met 100% of their carbon goal in 2022!

In 2019, I brought up how Nintendo is not a member. In 2023, they still aren't a member, though Niantic has been planting trees in Pokémon GO and Pikmin Bloom based on players walking. Several videogame associations across Earth (especially Europe) are members... except for the Entertainment Software Association (ESA), the primary videogame group in the USA. Regardless of that true fact, they're out spreading this false “fact”:

Dragon Quest Treasures Got a Demo!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - How did I like it?

Some time ago, DRAGON QUEST TREASURES released, and I opined that it should have received a demo so gamers could see if they'd like its gameplay loop, which is constructed in a way where it's more fun to play than to watch others play or read about. SQUARE ENIX got my message and released a demo of the game that is the first part of it. Demo progress will transfer to the paid game if you buy it, similar to the spectacular demo for Dragon Quest XI S: Echoes of an Elusive Age - Definitive Edition.

And that's nice, because DRAGON QUEST TREASURES initially takes place in the same world as Dragon Quest XI: Erdrea, featuring a younger Erik and his sister Mia living with the Vikings as assistants/servants for them, wishing to go on real treasure escapades like the Vikings do. That's consistent with their backstory in Dragon Quest XI.

Erik, you'll explore Erdrea years into the future.
For this game, you'll be in Draconia, which is a land of countless treasure made up of two formerly golden dragons that have turned to stone.

The demo starts in control of Erik as he goes around the Vikings to the deck of their boat, and frees Purrsula and Porcus with Mia. They escape and to a mysterious small island and encounter my biggest disappointment of the demo, and it's not that videos can't be captured. (Probably because Koichi Sugiyama worked on this game before he died.)

The Koopalings’ Formerly Green Shells

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Let's dedicate content to this once and for all. Rant coming!

I have been upset for many years now about what Shigeru Miyamoto has done with my shell colour. Well, me and many of my siblings, the Koopalings. Back when we were officially (as in, Nintendo was willing to say this) King Bowser Koopa's children, most of us had green shells to match his green shell, making it clear what our lineage is. Here are examples of our shell colours back before 2009:

Alright, you may say that the Super Mario Bros. 3 cartoon was all sorts of off-model on a frequent basis, but the shell colours were correct. Here is the only set of good sprites that we got before 2009, in Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga. (Everything else was off-model, Hotel Mario (which... is still off-model), or it was Yoshi's Safari, which doesn't give a good view of everyone's backsides.)

The 3DS remake of Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga changed our designs to fit the post-2009 “consensus.”
But at least sprite comics for many years were based on these correct, on-model colours.
(That's Wendy's only sprite with her shell showing on her sprite sheet.)

And then 2009 happened, New Super Mario Bros. Wii came out, and then Shigeru Miyamoto decided everything about us had to change. That we're merely minions of King Bowser and not his kids, and that his only kid is that rascal Bowser Jr. (And you can read that last “his kid” as either King Bowser or as Shigeru Miyamoto.) With that release, the shell colours changed:

Called It: The Splatoon 3 North American Championship 2023 Tournament Takes Places at PAX East After All

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Not that anyone said my guess would be wrong, but they just refused to confirm it.

As a smart, educated Koopaling, I knew the moment that Nintendo of America announced the Splatoon 3 Splatsville Showdown that took place in December 2022 and January 2023 that advertised that the Grand Prize winners “will win a round trip to Boston, MA and may be invited to participate in the Splatoon 3 North American Championship 2023 tournament”, that this Boston event would be PAX East.

Some people in the official support Discord server really thought that the trip would be a tour of the city or something, and they wanted to win it as a present for their siblings or parents or whatever. No, the winner would be expected to play in a NintendoVS tournament on PAX East, and you wouldn't want to give the prize to your non-Splatoon-playing younger sister because you wouldn't want them to be humiliated in front of a livestreamed audience. (And yes, it'll be streamed on March 26.)

Anyway, today Nintendo officially announced that, yes, the Splatoon 3 North American Championship 2023 would take place at PAX East (which is a gaming convention that occurs March 23 to March 26, managed by ReedPop, who are also managing E3 2023), and that “[t]op players from the Splatoon 3 Splatsville Showdown tournament will go squid-to-squid for prizes like Splatoon 3 themed controllers and trophies.” Those may sound like inadequate prizes, but keep in mind that everyone able to participate already got a set of prizes. (Including a trophy, the flight to Boston, and a hotel. Not mentioned is if they have PAX East tickets paid for by Nintendo.) Those Splatoon 3 teams are Starburst, Destiny Bond, Crush Soda, and Sayonara.

There are also two Mario Kart 8 Deluxe events for some reason. One is a qualifier (which takes place on two different days) where anyone attending PAX East can play, and if they do well, they get invited to a Championship Cup 2023 on March 26 and be livestreamed. The prizes are more trophies and controllers.

In addition, there is the NintendoVS Arcade booth open throughout PAX East, featuring Mario Party Superstars, Mario Golf: Super Rush, New Super Mario Bros. Deluxe, and Yoshi's Crafted World—all possibly multiplayer titles that they'll want you to play with other gamers there.

Two questions. Number one, why won't Nintendo come to E3 2023? Because ReedPop is marketing E3 2023 as partly a consumer event, they could have a similar multiplayer booth of old games there, too. Number two, why Yoshi's Crafted World? No one cares about that game. You know what would get people in your booth? Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. Whether it's available to casually play or they do an actual tournament for it at the event, that'd probably make the NintendoVS booth the hottest one at PAX East. (Or E3 2023 if they did it there.) Yoshi's Crafted World sure isn't in the spirit of NintendoVS, that I can tell you.


Ludwig dislikes the missed opportunity, and it's a bit weird that they are hosting an invitational for a total of four teams to play at. Bit what do you think of the matter? Let KoopaTV know in the comments section, and know that commenting enters YOU into a competition hosted by KoopaTV called the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program.


If you win a Splatoon 3 Championship 2023 Qualifier Event, you'll get a flight to Nintendo Live 2023, which is in the same building at the same time as PAX West.

CAPCOM PUBLISHER SALE March 2023: 3DS eShop $3 Games

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Your LAST chance. Ever.

Remember: On March 27, 2023, the Nintendo eShop virtual storefronts on the Wii U and the 3DS will close and you will not be able to purchase new games through any method. As of right now, you can purchase games for the Wii U and 3DS via nintendo.com and/or adding funds to your connected Nintendo Switch wallet.

This is the CAPCOM PUBLISHER SALE that the publisher referenced in last week's Spotlight.

Every 3DS game CAPCOM has on sale right now, which includes various Monster Hunter, Resident Evil, and Ace Attorney games, is only $2.99. With sales like these, even Detective Dick Gumshoe can buy these games. And as of right now, the only other place you can readily buy Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney–Dual Destinies, and Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney–Spirit of Justice are on... mobile platforms, and I'd never recommend going near those things. On the 3DS, they are unfortunately digital download-only. But I would recommend the fourth, fifth, and sixth mainline Ace Attorney titles before the vast majority of other games, if not any other game on the 3DS. They (and the other Ace Attorney games... look at Ace Attorney Turnabout Collection at 50% off on the Nintendo Switch) are the top games in the adventure genre. At $3 each... that's ridiculous value for games that will last you several tens of hours each.

Note that the 3DS games aren't in sale in Europe. Too bad. Switch games are, though.

Also of note is that after Monster Hunter Stories 2: Wings of Ruin got a permanent MSRP reduction to $40 from $60, it is now 50% off as well, which brings its price to $20. I think that's interesting. (And a great, worthy price point that you should think about.)

Still, Monster Hunter Stories 2 will be available for future purchases for quite a while to come. The Ace Attorney games on the 3DS, and videogames on the 3DS and Wii U in general... won't be. My recommendations are Ace Attorney, which will be on sale until they're no longer purchasable. Don't miss out. ...And get Pocket Card Jockey on the 3DS while you're at it. Sad to say, but there's nothing on the Wii U that I'd really urge you to go for in 2023.

Also, you'll want to buy those Ace Attorney games several days before the 27th, because Dual Destinies and Spirit of Justice both have a DLC case (that is worth the purchase price, which right now is greater than the price of $3 for the whole game) that requires playing the game a little bit to be able to buy and access. Chop chop! Get to it!


If you want Ludwig to discuss more details about why Ace Attorney is so wonderful and more than worth $3, ask him for an explanation in the comments section. If you already have the games, maybe go talk about what last-weeks purchases you're making.


The games in the March 2023 sale are the deepest discounted they've ever been. Just compare to the January 2023 sale.
The next sale came a month later. No 3DS games anymore.

American Legislators Would Rather Save Daylight Than Save Americans

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The priorities aren't aligned, much like your circadian rhythm after switching to Daylight Saving Time.

The worst day (or up there as one of top three worst) that (United States of) Americans must face was this weekend: the day they must switch to Daylight Saving Time. And despite living in Koopa Kingdom under a sane leader, KoopaTV sets itself to Daylight Saving Time standards to align with what goes on in the United States of America, because y'all are our main audience and we're customer(?)-centric. So your pain is my pain. And that makes me extremely sleepy.

Quite frankly, it's ridiculous that the people of America, the land of the free and home of the brave, hasn't gone and rioted against their idiot and hostile legislators for imposing Daylight Saving Time. It's true that no one likes twice-a-year clock changing, so what to do to change that has people divided into two camps. Legislative proponents of permanent Daylight Saving Time keep trying to pass the Sunshine Protection Act, as they did in the Senate in March 2022. This never went anywhere in the House and never became law, and that passing in the Senate is no longer valid in the current session of Congress and has to happen again. So now there is a fresh start to promote Standard Time, which is closest to the natural time that the sun follows. Your body also happens to follow (or want to follow) the sun's movements, as opposed to what the government, school (often ran by the government), and/or employer tells you when to wake up.

When Daylight Saving Time finally ended in 2022, I wrote about the Save Standard Time advocacy group's video series on The Science of Clock Change. (Funded by American Academy of Sleep Medicine Foundation.) Back then, the video series was just... one video, but now there is a playlist of NINE videos. You probably don't need to watch the whole cumulative hour or so of content to get the point, and this article will have some particularly interesting screen grabs that should catch your attention (and are backed by studies). Here's one:

MAR13 Day 2023: Marie the Spreadsheet Superheroine Squid Sister

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Poor Splatoon Wii U.

It is a tragic timing that today, as MAR13 Day (Marie Day) 2023, Splatoon on the Nintendo Wii U has its online services disabled in the name of “temporary emergency maintenance” that is on-going as of March 2, 2023. No one knows when the online service will resume, but the first Splatoon was, of course, Marie's first appearance. As one of the Squid Sisters, she has had interesting banter with her sidekick, Callie, sharing the stages and taking Splatfest sides. I recapped some of Marie's history during MAR13 Day 2022 here, or at least linked to several other KoopaTV articles that go more in-depth to that. So what does that leave for MAR13 Day 2023, besides much of Splatoon being inaccessible?

Marie sitting bored during MAR13 Day in Inkopolis.

If you bought the Splatoon 3 Expansion Pass, then you have access to Inkopolis as part of Wave 1 of the DLC. It's rather useless (though it does give you access to five new Tableturf Battle opponents), and Callie and Marie do not perform the newscast. I wouldn't recommend purchasing the Pass now. Still, it made the above screenshot possible. But you do not need to make an additional purchase in order to interact with Marie in Splatoon 3, and I'll discuss that. Just be warned that this involves some Splatoon 3 spoilers.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie Direct MAR10 2023 Trailer | Live Reaction Log

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Embarrassing.

I hate MAR10 Day the most out of all of the character-based days in March. Mario is awful and no one should like him. Getting that point across is the whole purpose of this website. I hope we're doing a good job at that. ...Please say we are.

On March 9 (notably March 10 in Japan), Nintendo held this Nintendo Direct:

A Direct that's not even seven minutes long doesn't really warrant a Reaction Log. But I don't think Mario Day deserves much effort from KoopaTV, given our natural opposition towards the subject.

It is worth noting that Nintendo has put some first-party games featuring Mario (and Yoshi and Donkey Kong) on sale for about $20 off. I'm not into that sort of thing. There is a way more important sale going on now that I'll write about in more detail next week.

CAPCOM Spotlight March 9 2023 Live Reaction!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Buy Ghost Trick.

Many videogame companies had presentations today, but for today's KoopaTV article, we'll be live-reacting to CAPCOM's presentation, the Capcom Spotlight of March 9, 2023. You can watch the presentation yourself here... I can't embed it here due to the presentation settings blocking that.

Before the Spotlight started, CAPCOM promised discussions on Resident Evil 4, Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection, Monster Hunter Rise: Sunbreak, Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective (a must-buy, and the existence of its port was revealed last month), and Exoprimal. I can tell you that the Spotlight did end up including more than those games!

[5:27 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://www.twitch.tv/capcomusa
[5:27 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Before the spotlight, CAPCOM Spotlight begins, it's a bunch of CAPCOM Creators influencers (so they're presumably all streamers) talking over a bunch of old trailers.
[5:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I hope they go away when it actually starts, because we need ME writing over a bunch of NEW trailers.
[5:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Or maybe they were CAPCOM employees the whole time because they said "our games".
[5:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: First game to be discussed is Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection on Nintendo Switch, PlayStation 4, and Steam next month.
[5:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Masakazu Eguchi AKA Mr. Famous, the collection's director, wants to share news.

MAR8 Day 2023: Marx's Guitars and Masks

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - He's doing alright for himself.

The last MAR8 Marx Day from 2022, I was quite critical of Marx's plans for... uh... power and domination, on the basis that they didn't make sense and were never likely to succeed.

Since then, Marx has been playing the guitar for the Kirby 30th Anniversary Music Fest and licensing his face to Magolor and his Merry Magoland Souvenir Shop's dress-up masks. (If you consider the latter to be a spoiler, then don't look after the page break.) Plus, his hat and bow-tie are a costume in Kirby's Dream Buffet.

It's interesting that Marx's glow stick colour is pink, similar to Kirby's.
The other glow sticks were non-pink colours.
I never associated Marx with pink, personally.

MAR7 Day 2023 and Marth... Emblem Marth is BORING!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's not the real Marth, though. But is it close enough to what he's like?

One of the things that Intelligent Systems had promised in the Ask the Developer series for Fire Emblem Engage was...

“[W]e have prepared Bond conversations for all Emblems, which is about 1,300 conversations. There's quite a lot of content there for those who want to listen to every conversation. [...] We have a great cast of voice actors, so we hope you'll enjoy these conversations. [...] I hope players will enjoy choosing the pairs they like and strengthening their favorite characters to their heart's content.”

Those words from Tsutomo Tei, director of Intelligent Systems, seemed like fairly promising hype about Emblem Bond Supports in Fire Emblem Engage. So for MAR7 Day, or Marth Day, I listened to the ~40 minutes of Marth Bond Support content in Fire Emblem Engage. And... it's... SO BORING. It's ridiculous that they hyped these conversations with the verb “enjoy”!

Cloud Versions of Switch Games are a Bummer

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Yeah, this is red meat... But at least there's something to chew on, unlike a wispy cloud game.

You know, if I was trying to be contrarian and interesting, I'd write an article trying to write about how Cloud versions of games on the Nintendo Switch are actually a good thing. There are actually two main reasons I've seen—espoused only by companies, not by real customers—for why Cloud versions are great for you:

1. Cloud versions don't take up storage space on your console because you're just streaming it over the Internet (and this also means you don't have a long download time if you're buying a game digitally)
2. Because the Nintendo Switch has less power compared to its rival consoles, some games can't be ported easily (or at all) to it. But with Cloud streaming, the power of the Switch console doesn't matter, so the game selection of Switch owners has expanded

Both of these things are true statements. I, for one, am quite concerned that my Nintendo Switch plus SD card are going to run out of space, especially if I keep buying games digitally. That's a reason I prefer to buy my games physically, and why titles that are only available through digital download are ANNOYING.

And while the first argument is solved by “just manufacture physical cards; it's probably cheaper than having/renting a giant data centre” (unless you are expecting a certain scale... one such provider is Ubitus), the second argument falls apart when you see stuff like Kingdom Hearts for the PlayStation 2 as a Cloud game. (Okay, KINGDOM HEARTS - HD 1.5+2.5 ReMIX - Cloud Version is a Cloud game of a PlayStation 4 compilation involving a PlayStation 3 remake of a PlayStation 2 remake. That's somewhat reductionist, but at some point someone needs to put their oversized shoe down and say it's wrong.) The Switch can handle that—SQUARE ENIX just found it easier (less effort) to stream it than to port it properly. Maybe they had to release a Kingdom Hearts game on the Switch, and fast, in order to justify Sora being in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate?

MAR5 Day 2023: Mars, puRUGly (Purbeauty!), and gLAMEow

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Happy Mar5 Day, for Galactic Commander Mars!

You remember Team Galactic Commander Mars, yes? In last year's MAR5 Day (Mars Day) article, I wrote how her combination of her looks, fashion sense, loyalty to her boss, and potentially vicious personality to her enemies makes her quite endearing.

But I didn't go into much detail on her signature Pokémon companion, her Purugly. She's great. Apparently, Purugly also terrifies a lot of newbies to Sinnoh. Purugly claws apart middling heroic children at the Valley Windworks, where she is drastically underleveled compared to when Purugly's pre-evolution, Glameow, evolves into Purugly (level 39). She's all-around great. Both Mars and her Purugly. I guess Mars can be classified as a (crazy) red-headed cat lady. Besides Purugly, Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Pokémon Shining Pearl gives Mars another pet cat, Espeon, in the Battle Tower. (That's content exclusive to those remasters, so anyone who tells you they provide no value over the originals or over Platinum is a liar.)

Mars commanding Purugly to get rid of some annoying pests.
(...I didn't notice this until now, but please refrain from looking at Mars's thumb.
...You looked, didn't you? What happened to it? Did Purugly play a role?)

A lot of people unfairly malign Purugly, so I'm going to see things from Mars's point of view (which is the correct one) and talk about why Purugly is really a Purbeauty.

Thoughts on Version 3.0.0 of Splatoon 3!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I don't have that much time to talk... there's a Big Run going on now!

At the start of this week, Splatoon 3 players are asked to update to version 3.0.0 for the new Fresh Season 2023. This brought new content and balance changes.

The biggest change, in my opinion, is that there is a jukebox in the lobby. For 100 currency units, you can change the song that plays in the lobby (though only when you're not queueing up for a match), and the song maintains through the two-hour rotations, but isn't maintained if you turn the game off and then back on. The jukebox also tells us the name and performer of all of the games's songs, including those in story mode, so I have updated my Which Music Plays in Which Alterna Kettle in Splatoon 3 article accordingly. Not far behind that change is that we can now play Tableturf Battle...ONLINE, versus other players! And I've already done this with a KoopaTV reader while listening to Seep & Destroy on the jukebox. Highly positive experience.

It's been a while that Lil Fruini showed himself around Ludwig since he wrote a guest article saying to boycott KoopaTV.
This screenshot is being nice; Ludwig won a majority of the time. But draws ARE rather rare and worth showing off.
The number of squares you ink up is the amount of experience points you earn.

A less positive experience is the existence of the Splatoon 3 Expansion Pass (for 25 USD)...which I actually went and purchased. Besides access to Inkopolis (which is just a model swap of Splatsville), you also get access to a whole bunch of drink tickets and MONEY. In-game money. That's appreciated for all of the new gear that the Fresh Season has brought us.

Disgraced Game Developer Yuji Naka Confesses his Insider Trading to the Court

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Hopefully this is a SONIC SPEED trial, then.

I am rather obsessed with the developing saga from the end of last year where disgraced BALAN WONDERWORLD director and former SQUARE ENIX employee Yuji Naka got arrested for insider-trading Aiming Inc. shares with private information about Dragon Quest Tact... and then got arrested again very shortly after being let out of jail because they found out he also insider-traded Ateam Inc. shares with private information about FINAL FANTASY VII: The First Soldier. He's a menace to society.

Following arrests (and repeated arrests) are trials, and Yuji Naka just had his first day at court. Japanese sources report that Yuji Naka confessed to buying the stocks in those two companies, and that there is no doubt that he did so. He admitted that he knew about those mobile games’ developments before they were announced and that he bought the stocks in the companies that SQUARE ENIX was working with on those games when the general public didn't know those companies would be working on them. He admitted to making about $145,000 in profit, which is probably more than BALAN WONDERWORLD's profit. I can't confirm that, but it should be true in a just world.

At least Yuji Naka is making it easier for everyone by admitting these facts. Now, the reports don't actually say he has plead guilty or that he has no defence, but he's basically already admitted to the particulars of the crime, so my expert analysis says that he's given up and has accepted his fate. Since he had two instances of insider trading, this should be an easy verdict of two guilty charges, and hopefully Yuji Naka can remain locked up. ...My un-expert reading of Japan's Financial Instruments and Exchange Act says Yuji Naka could be banished from society for several months, or at most a couple of years.

At least Yuji Naka didn't trade with THREE different companies. (At least, not that we know of.)
(It's hard to figure out who is the biggest loser out of Wocky Kitaki or Yuji Naka. They fit well together.)

Do you think the Yuji Naka case is going to be a done deal now, or will there be plot twists ahead that make it go into unexpected directions? Let KoopaTV know in the comments section below! Also, feel free to provide more ideas of how to visually represent Yuji Naka's plight in the comments section as well, because there should be at least one more KoopaTV article about him (when he gets sentenced).


Here is the KoopaTV article three months later about Yuji Naka being sentenced. The punishment was higher than expected.

KoopaTV's February 2023 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It feels like we're getting closer to... something?

Welcome to this month's KoopaTV newsletter, reviewing the month of February 2023! This month may have been shorter than usual, but that just means there were about one to three less KoopaTV articles published in the month than a normal month. (That's how you should measure how good a month was, by how good KoopaTV was. ...And, like, you should think that way even when you're not browsing this site.)

Let's judge ourselves...together! Which means KoopaTV judges KoopaTV, and then KoopaTV judges YOU.

Top Five Recommended Experiences of February 2023

Here were the top five articles published in February 2023, listed in chronological order. February 2023 only had twenty articles, so one in four of them are showing up here! That's a more generous fraction than usual, because more articles to choose from makes it more difficult to come up with a top five. That's the benefit of us having such consistently terrific content to experience.

1. Favourite Chocolate Splatfest: Milk Fans and Chocolate Lovers Alike Choose Milk Chocolate — Both Ludwig (a milk fan) and Witch Princess (a chocolate lover) chime in on why you should (have) supported Team Milk Chocolate in the favourite chocolate Splatfest. Features photographs of Ludwig eating milk and dark chocolates.
2. Saturday Night Live's "HBO Mario Kart Trailer" is an Improvement over "Wario" — Saturday Night Live revisited doing skits based off our world, and their parody of how HBO does videogame-based shows is way better than what they did in 2022. This is an actual review of their humour and set-up.
3. Reggie Fils-Aime vs. Masahiro Sakurai: Competing with the Past or Competing for Time? — Masahiro Sakurai believes that modern videogames compete with other modern videogames; Reggie Fils-Aime believes that modern videogames compete not only with modern AND past videogames, but any form of entertainment or activity that uses up free time. Who is right?
4. Cool, the Media Believes the Mario Bros. are Plumbers Again — Once upon a time, the FAKE NEWS told you that the Mario Brothers are no longer plumbers. They've since changed their mind, but what they're still not telling you are that their plumbing business is quite extortionist and predatory.
5. The Widely Agreed Upon Travesty of White Chocolate Winning the Favorite Chocolate Splatfest — KoopaTV's very first (and only?) multi-guest article, featuring many contributors from the Splatoon 3 community that are collectively outraged that Team White Chocolate won the favourite chocolate Splatfest. Also features a photograph of Ludwig eating white chocolate.

That... White Chocolate article (classified as Guest Art) is an experience rarely seen on KoopaTV, so you really want to check that out. But you'll also want to check out its prequel where the staff was for Milk Chocolate. Fortunately, both were fantastic and both were published in February 2023, so both get to be featured here! ...Ah, and by the way, you should go through all of the experiences published on KoopaTV. They're worth it in one way or another, and build on a canon.