Nintendo Direct June 21, 2023 Live Reactions!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - There's a lot of emotion involved, at least.

Today, there was a Nintendo Direct livestream featuring roughly 40 minutes of information focused mainly on Nintendo Switch titles launching this year, including new details on Pikmin 4. Watch it embedded here:

I gave a live-reacted text log (annotated with select screenshots) below. KoopaTV staffer Kamek is also present in the log... in his own way.

[9:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7t5jnpkCkI
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM AHH
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Back.
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not sure if I did a good job wiping myself but I don't have enough time for that!
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Some people have already asked me what I expect or want to see in this Nintendo Direct. I expect nothing. I didn't ask for this event to happen.
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But I am interested in the fact that media people / influencers / whomever have claimed that Nintendo backed out of E3 2023 because they have a weak lineup and have nothing to show.
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: First thing: Pokémon.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Someone also told me there wouldn't be Pokémon at Nintendo Direct because Pokémon has their own event.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Obviously mistaken.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is showing the Pokémon Scarlet and Violet DLC, which Nintendo has every interest in showing because it's what we know is their holiday-season plans.
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With those three anti-ogre freaky things.
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And the masked dude.
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not a fan of them.
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Where's Terapagos?
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Part 2: The Indigo Disk"
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ew I don't like that girl named Lacey

Lacey rubs me the wrong way!

[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: A whole lot of nothing with a rainbow.
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: OH, SHELL.
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WAIT WHAT THAT'S IT? THAT WASN'T INFORMATIVE.
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The DLC parts will be Fall and Winter.
[10:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Teal Mask is Fall and Indigo Disk (Blueberry Academy in the middle of the ocean) is Winter.
[10:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Unlike the other companies' presentations, Nintendo didn't actually create sub-titles ahead of time.
[10:05 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Nintendo is now showing Sonic Superstars, a 2D Sonic the Hedgehog game with Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, and Amy Rose. This game is developed by Arzest, so it will be bad.
[10:05 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring 4-player local co-op.
[10:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Blissful life farming sim that also has a vast journey.
[10:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It resembles an MMO from 20 years ago. "Palia" "free-to-play"
[10:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Persona 5 Tactica, the tactical spin-off of Persona 5 we've seen in certain other company presentations, is also coming to Nintendo Switch.
[10:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It releases on November 17, 2023. There'll be a physical edition that you can pre-order.
[10:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ooh, Saturday Morning Cartoongame, "MythForce" by Aspyr... it's first-person.
[10:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which completely defeats the point of the game's theme.
[10:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Because you can't see your cartoon hero.
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: AHHH
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: SPLATOON?
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "This Splatfest is going to be pretty sweet!"
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We've already had SEVERAL Splatfests in this game about sweetness.
[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which ice cream flavour is best? Vanilla, strawberry, or Mint chip? Happening July 14 to July 16.

Ice cream is at least better than cake.
This is reminiscent of the favourite chocolate Splatfest that just happened.
This wouldn't happen if Team Sweet didn't win. (Though I supported that.)
Vanilla is the best choice here, and it's the most customisable with toppings.
Mint chip is just eating toothpaste.

[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The correct answer is vanilla.
[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Mint chip is Big Man's choice, which is fitting, because it's the worst choice.
[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: uhhhh
[10:11 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Detective Pikachu? Again?
[10:11 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Detective Pikachu Returns" this fall.
[10:11 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: He loves coffee.
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You can't make me like this.
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm a bit upset that KoopaTV won't be around to write about the Splatfest. :(
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Eh? Super Mari0 RPG?
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...or not?
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Or yes.
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But the graphics are...uh...not SNES-y.
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's Mallow!
[10:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And that overrated doll.
[10:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh, hey, this is a very nice boss theme remix I can get behind.
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: SMRPG November 17, 2023.

At least King Bowser looks way better than he did in the actual Super Mario RPG.

[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I associate SMRPG with being disappointed at how much it was hyped up.
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Huh?
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Princess Peach gets her own videogame?
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And it's not Super Princess Peach?
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "What on earth is happening?" - Nintendo executive quote, not mine
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "There's actually something else."
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Luig1's Mansion Dark Moon will have an "enhanced release" on the Switch.
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Looks like Mari0 fans have a lot of games to look forward to."
[10:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Switch snap to go to Batman.
[10:17 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "three iconic games; all DLC; one complete package"
[10:17 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Batman Arkham Trilogy launches on Nintendo Switch Fall 2023.
[10:18 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I wonder if they'll be releasing such a trilogy on other platforms too.
[10:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Skimming over "Gloomhaven", here's Ubisoft's Just Dance 2024, but without the live on-stage performance that was actually at Ubisoft's presentation from last week.
[10:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Lemme talk more about SMRPG.
[10:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I first played it on Labor Day on the Wii Virtual Console when it came out, after it was hyped for years on the Nintendo NSider Forums.
[10:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And it was so inferior to Superstar Saga, Paper Mari0 64, and the Thousand-Year Door.
[10:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: YO COW

moo

[10:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: OKAY WHAT'S THIS GAME
[10:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Something about abysses and a king stealing the world's words.
[10:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Silent Hope" by Xseed/Marvelous on Switch October 3.
[10:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Here's another farm game, Fae Farm, with enchanted faerie stuff.
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's the Rabbids Sparks of Hope DLC that was mentioned at Ubisoft's conference.
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With a robotic King Bob-omb. Apparently it launches today. And a demo (of the mian game) is available now on the eShop.
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: DRAGON QUEST
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright I'm paying attention.
[10:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "You're going to have to become a monster wrangler."
[10:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Your hero has lost the ability to fight themselves, so they need to wrangle (and combine) monsters to fight for them against a dark lord of some sort.
[10:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Dragon Quest Monsters: The Dark Prince"
[10:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: December 1, 2023.
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It seems like it'll be another one of those "better Pokémon games than Pokémon."
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Pikmin 4 segment.
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The dog is named Oatchi. You must repair your crashed spaceship.
[10:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Throw your little buds at things and they'll work for you." It'd be a good pun, but all of the Pikmin on-screen are flower Pikmin.
[10:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Leaf Pikmin just brought back a Game Boy Advance SP.
[10:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: BUD PIKMIN WHERE
[10:27 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Showing cave levels, which were the best part of Pikmin 2.
[10:27 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Dandori Battles"?
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Rescuing castaways from people who...uh... are just like you but antagonistic.
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: These castaways are NPCs that are generic.

They DO get faces, but only after you rescue them.

[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "You can eventually set out for night expeditions!"
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: GLOW PIKMIN
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: FREAKY
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Find luminols" to distract frenzied monsters.
[10:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Back in my day, luminol was used to test for blood presence.
[10:29 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Pikmin 4 releases in one month.
[10:29 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Even more Pikmin news to share. HD versions of Pikmin 1 and Pikmin 2 are releasing on the Nintendo eShop today, and Pikmin 4 will receive a demo version in one week.
[10:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Can there be an HD version of Super Smash Bros. Melee so I can get the Captain Olimar trophy on it?
[10:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Whoa, speaking of Smash Bros., there's a Metal Gear Solid compilation.
[10:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring Metal Gear Solid, Metal Gear Solid 2, Metal Gear Solid 3, Metal Gear, and Metal Gear 2. And Snake's Revenge. Plus, a Metal Gear Solid Digital Graphic novel and its sequel, and spoilerific strategy guides, digital soundtrack, and artwork. "Metal Gear Solid Master Collection Vol. 1" releases October 24, 2023. Seems like they want a volume 2 in the future.
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You thought the next segment was Castlevania, but it's "Vampire Survivor" where you survive for 30 minutes against an overhead view of monster spam.
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That's just, like, this Madness game I played on Newgrounds decades ago.
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "A Pretty Coo Musical Party"... Aviary Att-...
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...no.
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: A "rhythm battle royale game" from Team17; Headbangers Rhythm Game.
[10:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Penny's Big Breakaway", a 3D platforming adventure (from the team behind Sonic Mania), with stylish acrobatic tricks to defeat and flee from nefarious penguins.
[10:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Coming Early 2024.
[10:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wave 5 of the Mari0 Kart 8 Deluxe Booster Course Pass, with a giant fan.
[10:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Squeaky Clean Sprint" (the fan isn't a Paper Mari0 reference)
[10:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: EEEK PETEY PIRANHA new character. And Wiggler.
[10:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: AND KANEASVEWAS
[10:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: KAMEK

“Kamek from Mario Kart Tour” is a fairly humiliating way to be introduced.

[10:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Star Ocean 2...remake.
[10:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With lovable 2D-3D look.
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Star Ocean the Second Story R"
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Meanwhile, WarioWare game.
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Even I want to see Wario Land.
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "move your body"
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uhhhhh
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Goofy motion control-based micro-games?
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THIS IS JUST WAGGLING.
[10:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "WarioWare Move It!" on November 3, 2023. Co-developed by Intelligent Systems.
[10:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Nintendo Live 2023 plug.
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They want people to enter the random drawing before it ends tomorrow.
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WHAT
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THE CHALLENGE CUP WILL BE THREEFOLD??
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: June 25, one in July, and one in August?
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NOOO
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I just wrote an article about how the Challenge Cups won't be fun.
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WHOA Zelda and Ganondorf amiibo strutting stuff.

This Ganondorf amiibo does look very cool.

[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Last announcement.
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring a really ugly Mari0 sprite.
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I hate it.
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I hate everything about it.
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's a talking bell flower too.
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I hope I'm not in this game my gosh.
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Super Mari0 Bros Wonder"
[10:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ew it's Daisy
[10:42 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Releases October 20.
[10:42 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WTF
[10:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: MARI0 TURNED INTO AN ELEPHANT AND MURDERED A GOOMBA

A couple of frames before this, this Goomba was sleeping blissfully.
Then (Elephant) Mario mauls him.
People who defend this man as someone just defending the Mushroom Kingdom against invading soldiers are spreading FAKE NEWS.
He's a danger to civilisation and a genocidal monster who massacres millions of Goombas regularly.

[10:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, if the Republican Party lets Mari0 into the game, there really needs to be gatekeeping.
[10:45 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is all Donald Trump's fault.
[10:45 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: *lets Mari0 into the party
[10:47 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I hate it and I hate everything about it.
[10:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: KoopaTV can't end anytime sooner!


Ludwig later cleaned the rest of his butt after the Nintendo Direct ended. In case you were wondering about that plot point. So, what did you think of the Nintendo Direct of June 21? Do you think that they could've easily had stuff to show at E3 2023 if they didn't pull out of it? Since it's not obvious from the log, Ludwig's favourite part of the Direct was the excerpt of the new remix of the Fight Against a Somewhat Stronger Monster theme from Super Mario RPG, even though he dislikes both the original game and most of its soundtrack.


Click here for more information about the NintendoVS Challenge Cup June 2023 (and July 2023, and August 2023).
The last Nintendo Direct was in February 2023.