By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Does the hype meet expectations?
This is the conference to explain why our E3 2015 KoopaTV banner has Rare logos on it. It may be the conference that our collective KoopaTV staff energy is most hyped for. This is the Microsoft Conference, discussing the Xbox One, Windows 10, and all the games.
Of course, RawkHawk2010 is here. I'm here as Nintendork 13 13. Vortexica too as breezinabout. Let's go.
 |
| Phil Spencer with his shirt covered. |
RawkHawk2010 12:19 pm
Chad and Hyle talked about the idea of Phil walking on stage shirtless.
With a sharktooth necklace and yellow shorts.
Nintendork 13 13 12:19 pm
...now it froze
RawkHawk2010 12:19 pm
And then he'd be like,
"Here's Battletoads!"
RawkHawk2010 12:21 pm
K I'm on Twitch.
8 MINUTES
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
so what'd you have to say
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
Oh, we're live?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
yeh
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
I feel bad we Greg Gutfeld'd Bethesda
But we'll give freaking EA our undivided attention.
Is that like, a form of E3 hazing?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
Hey.
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
The freshman conference gets hazed?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
That's what Bethesda gets for their timing.
Nintendork 13 13 12:24 pm
To be fair, Bethesda has much more friendly timing.
People who actually have day jobs can't watch E3.
RawkHawk2010 12:24 pm
(We also don't really care about Bethesda and never will.)
Nintendork 13 13 12:24 pm
(Except Sony)
(I thought Fallout Shelter was cute!)
Hey, did you read the captions to the screenshots in the logs?
I got some pretty good ones.
RawkHawk2010 12:25 pm
I will.
RawkHawk2010 12:25 pm
I dreamt last night that Phil was on The Greg Gutfeld Show.
And he pulled a zipper on his back to reveal himself as actually being Silent Hillary.
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
......
Oh yeah, Jeb Bush announces his campaign today.
RawkHawk2010 12:26 pm
PFFT
When?!
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
Uhhh
RawkHawk2010 12:26 pm
We ain't watchin' that.
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
I know
RawkHawk2010 12:27 pm
Music changed!
Nintendork 13 13 12:27 pm
I'm looking
no one gives a time
So I guess it's a Hillary-esque thing
Apparently
Monday afternoon
at Miami Dade College
RawkHawk2010 12:28 pm
I'm so uncomfortably excited.
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
Where's Vortex?
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
Or Kamek?
breezinabout@msn.com 12:29 pm
YO.
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
...
I found Vortex.
:-P
http://www.twitch.tv/xbox
There's weird music
but at least it's loud.
Unlike the Nintendo World Championships.
RawkHawk2010 12:30 pm
Yeah, fuck that noise.
Nintendork 13 13 12:30 pm
it stopped
...oh wait no that was my browser
OH
RawkHawk2010 12:30 pm
IT BEGINS.
Nintendork 13 13 12:30 pm
APPLAUSE
E-M
Raining
RawkHawk2010 12:31 pm
Forza
Nintendork 13 13 12:31 pm
"Discover, explore" *cut to FORZA*
RawkHawk2010 12:31 pm
Gears
Halo
Nintendork 13 13 12:31 pm
Fat generic white guy
oh that's Gears
Kinda looked like Packie from the Nintendo World Championships
but with muscles over fat.
RawkHawk2010 12:32 pm
lolololol
which one of these is the rare guy
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:32 pm
"Jump ahead."
RawkHawk2010 12:32 pm
Look for Phil's shirt.
Nintendork 13 13 12:32 pm
Some googly-eyed freak wouldn't look right.
Xbox E3 2015 Briefing
Should I not call it the Microsoft conference?
Welcome Bonnie Ross
(Better than Cammie freaking Dunaway)
"The characters, the games, and the stories that people love"
She mentioned characters before games?
(Jab at Miyamoto?)
RawkHawk2010 12:33 pm
2015 - greatest lineup in Xbox history.
Nintendork 13 13 12:33 pm
Best exclusive games launching THIS year.
Nintendork 13 13 12:33 pm
Open with Halo 5
RawkHawk2010 12:33 pm
Halo 5.
Oh hey I'm actually sort of interested.
Nintendork 13 13 12:34 pm
"Master Chief... hero... or traitor?"
(Edward Snowden?)
"Friend... or foe?" (Al Sharpton?)
RawkHawk2010 12:34 pm
"I wanna know!"
Nintendork 13 13 12:34 pm
"Every target is just another target, buck."
Master Chief absent without leave.
(Kamek?)
"Coming This Holiday, Pre-Order Now"
(The trailer just started!)
...(oh nope it's gameplay)
Oh, the dude's actual name is "Buck"
RawkHawk2010 12:35 pm
Reminds me of Beck.
Nintendork 13 13 12:35 pm
There's a "Tanaka"
RawkHawk2010 12:35 pm
Well, there's a lot of purple.
Nintendork 13 13 12:35 pm
(ain't that a Nintendo employee?)
RawkHawk2010 12:36 pm
You should like that.
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
I do.
There was some punk who just burned in a purple fire.
breezinabout@msn.com 12:36 pm
LOL "I regret everything!"
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
(in the game)
breezinabout@msn.com 12:36 pm
I didn't think Halo was capable of humour.
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
"Keep your head down and run!"
(How do you know what's ahead of you?)
"I'm okay! Keep going!" *almost died and is dangling off cliff*
RawkHawk2010 12:37 pm
Prometheans.
Nintendork 13 13 12:37 pm
Shots fired.
Nintendork 13 13 12:37 pm
"ugh, I'm down" - token woman
(first and only person down)
So your player character is giving orders.
It's usually an NPC who is the captain.
RawkHawk2010 12:38 pm
That's basically the opposite of Reach.
Where every NPC is bossing you around because you're a newb.
Nintendork 13 13 12:39 pm
Yeah. Call of Duty did that too.
RawkHawk2010 12:39 pm
That melee strike was pretty cool.
Nintendork 13 13 12:39 pm
They must love these voice modifiers.
"Your passage is gonna be denied tonight motherfucker"
RawkHawk2010 12:40 pm
Good on MS for putting a trailer after the gameplay.
Most of the time the gameplay just ends abruptly and that's the end of the showcase.
Nintendork 13 13 12:40 pm
Control two Spartan squads with drop-in/drop-out
Epic scale of campaign carries to multiplayer.
Massive environments 4 times the size of any previous Halo map
And playable at E3.
(...guess we gotta get passes next year)
RawkHawk2010 12:41 pm
Hell yeah.
Nintendork 13 13 12:41 pm
Player vs. Player now Player vs. Everything
"WARZONE"
RawkHawk2010 12:41 pm
VEHICLES
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
"WHERE EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE"
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
Did you see that Warthog careen through there?
That's what I want.
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
Xbox 1 exclusive world premiere
Microsoft Studios
wot's this
No segue
Just another trailer
Walking through snow
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
is this rare
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
with a robot
wtf
Keiji Inafune
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
WTF
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
and the makers of Metroid Prime?!
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
I thought he was
breezinabout@msn.com 12:43 pm
Makers of Metroid Prime?!
RawkHawk2010 12:43 pm
What happened to Mighty No. 9?!
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
What what whaaaaaat
breezinabout@msn.com 12:43 pm
You have my attention.
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
(Well that's why there's a robotic dog)
Female protagonist
RawkHawk2010 12:43 pm
So is this woman a Samus expy?
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
Samus expy with Rush expy
Grappling hook
"NO!!!"
RUSH EXPLODED
RawkHawk2010 12:44 pm
Violins.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
Samus expy seems distraught
RawkHawk2010 12:44 pm
Good.
Good on violins.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
Rush expy left a core orb
Samus expy puts it in some conveniently place mecha
breezinabout@msn.com 12:44 pm
Microsoft just loves their "sad for dogs" moments.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
"Welcome back buddy."
Quadraxis?!!?
RECORE
Spring 2016
The game is called Recore
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
PHIL
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
PHIL SPENCER
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
PHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL
WHERE'S HIS SHIRT
AHAHAHHAHH
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Blocked
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
THAT'S RARE
It's gotta be.
It's GOLD!
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Comcept
and Armature
First party franchise for Xbox 1
exclusive
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
didn't they make star fox
oh wait that was argonaut
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Microsoft got a Japanese studio?
First party exclusives everywhere
Nintendork 13 13 12:46 pm
Depth, breadth, and diversity
breezinabout@msn.com 12:46 pm
$10 says Phil eventually unzips to reveal that logo.
RawkHawk2010 12:46 pm
#IStandWithPhil
Nintendork 13 13 12:46 pm
Batman
breezinabout@msn.com 12:46 pm
Exactly.
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
XBOX ONE
BACKWARDS
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
BACKWARDS COMPATIBILITY
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
COMPATIBILITY
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
HOLY SHIT.
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
XBOX 360 PLAYABLE ON XBOX
one
Playable NATIVELY
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
DON MATTRICK OWNED.
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
Please welcome Mike Ubara
To show us backwards compatibility in action
oh wow this guy's voice
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
This guy's voice.
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Mike Ybarra"
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
Mike Ybarra's
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Head of platform engineering"
One of his favourite games
Mass Effect on Xbox 1
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Game runs exactly like it does on Xbox 360... BUT BETTER"
"Xbox take a screenshot"
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
whoaaaaaaah.
Xbox One features implemented.
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
I took a screenshot
of Xbox taking a screenshot
breezinabout@msn.com 12:49 pm
Yo dawg.
RawkHawk2010 12:49 pm
Why can't Nintendo do this?
You have to fucking rebuy Super Mario Galaxy if you want to Miiverse it!
Nintendork 13 13 12:49 pm
"We won't charge you to play games you already own"
(Dammit Nintendo)
Those audience members are creepy
RawkHawk2010 12:49 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 12:49 pm
on the sides of Phil Spencer.
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
CHAD AND HYLE
Chad and Hyle were in the audience.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
Xbox Elite Wireless controller
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
Front row.
ahahahahahahaha.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
...(well they're creepy!)
wtf the controller was revving an engine
"Pro-level precision"
"Hair trigger locks"
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
(I dson't get it)
Game-changing accuracy
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
I wish Nuts & Bolts had been the game demo'd for BC.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
"Swappable components"
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
Just to terrify everyone.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
"Limitless customisation"
You can take the buttons off the controller
and literally reconfigure them?
...What's the point of that? >_>
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
Well I'm already losing my 3DS buttons.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
wtf Todd Howard from Bethesda is back?
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
As are you.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
:-(
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
wtf Bethesda
BESTHESDA HAD THEIR TIME
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
Fallout 4
BETHESDA DUDE SAID HE ONLY WANTED ONE FALLOUT DEMO
SO THAT'S WHY THEY HAD A CONFERENCE
SO WHAT'S THIS
THIS IS A SECOND DEMO
RawkHawk2010 12:52 pm
(See, that log should have been dedicated entirely to Gutfeld.)
Nintendork 13 13 12:52 pm
(lol)
Nintendork 13 13 12:52 pm
ahhh
hE NAMED IT PHIL SPENCER
The Pip Boy
RawkHawk2010 12:52 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
(Charssie said it's called "Pip Boy" not "Pit Boy")
RawkHawk2010 12:53 pm
Yeah that's what I hear.
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
family robot creepy
"you're still here, so other people can still be here..."
breezinabout@msn.com 12:53 pm
Why does he sound like John Cleese?
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
(IT'S A ROBOT)
RawkHawk2010 12:54 pm
More dog.
Nintendork 13 13 12:54 pm
Random dog
"You wanna come with me, pal?"
"woof"
"Oh well, let's go together."
And right after that
the dog goes out and mauls random humans
RawkHawk2010 12:54 pm
That dog looks just like door-lifting one from Call of Duty: Ghosts.
Nintendork 13 13 12:55 pm
Ya, Riley.
(The dog)
Herman Cain expy
RawkHawk2010 12:55 pm
This black guy looks like Confederado Reggie.
Nintendork 13 13 12:55 pm
lol
Dude these "raiders" you're shooting
Your player seems more of a raider than they are.
RawkHawk2010 12:56 pm
dinosaurs
Nintendork 13 13 12:56 pm
Especially since you literally scrap random metal and buildings.
The same random walking montage from last night
Nintendork 13 13 12:57 pm
"Xbox Exclusive Offer: Fallout 3 is packaged with Fallout 4"
"Mods created on the PC, able to be transferred and played for free on Xbox One"
Peter Moore, chief operating officer of Electronic Arts
RawkHawk2010 12:58 pm
Peter Moore
Nintendork 13 13 12:58 pm
(HEY, THIS GUY IS COMING UP NEXT)
(WHAT'S HE DOING HERE)
RawkHawk2010 12:58 pm
Welcome home, Peter.
Nintendork 13 13 12:58 pm
...
Oh yeah, EA Access.
I wrote something criticising that.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Peter used to be in Phil's place.
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
"I know a lot of you want to play Madden NFL 16!"
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Are they really saving Rare for the end? Ahahaha.
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
*lukewarm audience*
We're only half an hour in.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
how long is this
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
Unknown.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
KoopaTV schedule has a question mark for end time.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Oh god
I thought they were announcing an Attack on Titan game.
Nintendork 13 13 1:00 pm
Nah, Titanfall and Dragon Age Inquisition to the EA Access Vault.
"This week, in celebration of E3, we're opening up the EA Access Vault to ALL Xbox Gold members"
"For free! All week long."
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
that ain't me.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:01 pm
"Scant applause"
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
Ooh, Plants vs. Zombies.
Garden Warfare 2.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
"Because of your passion for the insanely fun Plants vs. Zombie franchise, I'm pleased to announce today Plants vs. Zombies Garden Warfare 2"
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
We were supposed to play the first one.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
...oh yeah.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:01 pm
...
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
Well he'll talk more about it next conference.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
"World premiere trailer"
What's he gonna leave for his own conference?
Talking about FIFA's grass?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:02 pm
Pirate zombie!
RawkHawk2010 1:02 pm
This reminds me of Ghoulies.
A lot.
Not even the characters.
But the environments.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:03 pm
lol, Danger Zone playing in the background
RawkHawk2010 1:03 pm
Ludwig
Fruit Dudes.
That was...
...whoever our Orange is.
Nintendork 13 13 1:03 pm
...
We have an Orange?
I thought we had a Mango
RawkHawk2010 1:03 pm
Oh.
Mango Mang?
Nintendork 13 13 1:03 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
We'll talk about it later.
We gotta look at cars.
FORZA Motorsport 6
On-stage cars?
YUP
breezinabout@msn.com 1:04 pm
*Snore*
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
"The GT is back"
*Dragon Ball fans moan*
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
It's not an E3 without car porn.
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
Jesus Chirst
Dude
s
What if those cables just...broke.
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
While it was being lifted down.
Would have been amazing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
That's why there is E3 rehearsal.
RawkHawk2010 1:05 pm
Henry Ford III is there?!
Didn't even know he existed.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
Sell-out. <_<
breezinabout@msn.com 1:05 pm
"Thanks Henry", he says in the most apathetic tone of voice EVER.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
Forza Motorsport 6 Xbox One exclusive.
THE CAR IS BEING LIFTED AWAY
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
"Oh beautiful it issss~~~"
RawkHawk2010 1:06 pm
And it was blocking the screen.
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
*while showing the car in different angles*
My gosh these car pornographers are shameless.
RawkHawk2010 1:06 pm
where's the autopegging
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
"1080p 60 fps REALISM"
(Is real life in 1080p and 60 fps?)
breezinabout@msn.com 1:06 pm
1080p, 60fps? I'll believe that when I see it.
Nintendork 13 13 1:07 pm
How many frames per second is real life? >_>
"World premiere"
This could be anything!
BANDAI NAMCO
breezinabout@msn.com 1:07 pm
However many the eye can manage I guess.
RawkHawk2010 1:07 pm
Not anymore!
Nintendork 13 13 1:07 pm
Developed by FromSoftware
(Dammit Namco we had something going on together!)
RawkHawk2010 1:07 pm
So, Souls.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:07 pm
Dark Souls III?
RawkHawk2010 1:08 pm
I didn't think From Software was this big.
They've been doing like three or four games at once.
Including that Monster Hunter.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
Cue ominous Latin chanting.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Is there any non-ominous Latin chanting?
RawkHawk2010 1:09 pm
(Read KoopaTV in Latin, kids. It's fun.)
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
lol, good point.
And yeah, listen to Rawk.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Is this the same game they just showed
RawkHawk2010 1:09 pm
No idea.
lol
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
Can't be.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Ubisoft
Tom Clancy's
OH
OHHHHH
OHHHHHHH
THE DIVISION
World premiere?!?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:10 pm
DIVISION
RawkHawk2010 1:10 pm
.....what?
Nintendork 13 13 1:10 pm
We've known about it since E3 2013!
How is it a world premiere?!
RawkHawk2010 1:10 pm
I thought this was already OUT.
Nintendork 13 13 1:10 pm
No, it's not out.
I dunno when it's coming out.
"We...are the DIVISION"
"We don't know how many of us there are."
RawkHawk2010 1:11 pm
So does "World Premiere" mean anything anymore.
Nintendork 13 13 1:11 pm
no
Please welcome Laurent Detoc from Ubisoft
"Bonjour!"
RawkHawk2010 1:11 pm
They really are saving Rare for the ened.
end*
Nintendork 13 13 1:12 pm
Exclusive Beta first on Xbox One this December
(so not coming out until 2016)
RawkHawk2010 1:12 pm
If that.
Nintendork 13 13 1:13 pm
Maybe it'll come out on the NX.
Rainbow Six stuff
RawkHawk2010 1:13 pm
what if "NX" stands for
"Nintendo Xbox"
Because Phil bought them?
Nintendork 13 13 1:14 pm
............................
:|
"Go!" "Got 'em!"
"Got 'em!" "Got 'em!"
I like Ubisoft's player dialogue trailers
They're so polite.
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
"Yeeeeeeah, nice shot!"
*trailer ends*
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
Windows 10 and Xbox 1 Exclusive
Motiga?
Colourful environments
breezinabout@msn.com 1:15 pm
What have we here...
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
"MEET YOUR GUARDIAN"
"CHOOSE YOUR HERO"
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
Good thing they said who made this prior.
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
I might've thought this was Rare.
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
IT's cel-shaded
I think
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
I like these character designs.
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
"Gigantic"
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
And music.
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
it froze at
"Gigantic - Windows 10 & Xbox One Exclusive"
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
Valoo
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
Firefox at 40% CPU usage
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
Cuphead.
Whoa
I just heard a Koopa shell noise.
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
whaaat
*force-quits Firefox*
*reload*
RawkHawk2010 1:17 pm
Yeah, it was some Indie game.
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
What the hell am I looking at now
breezinabout@msn.com 1:17 pm
Too many games... Can't process...
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
Is this an indie montage
"ID @ Xbox"
(ID... InDie?)
RawkHawk2010 1:18 pm
Well that was a more interesting Indie reel than Nintendo ever had.
Steve Gaynor.
*stifles a laugh*
RawkHawk2010 1:20 pm
what is this
Nintendork 13 13 1:20 pm
I dunno
breezinabout@msn.com 1:20 pm
So... Gone Home IN SPAAAAACE?!
Oh It's already over...
Nintendork 13 13 1:20 pm
I'm using this time to get the screenshots up to where the log is now.
More "friend or foe" stuff
Al Sharpton a thought leader.
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Thought the bird screech was a baby crying.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
Ditto.
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Whoa.
These characters are LITERALLY faceless.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
FACELESS PEOPLE
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
...
uh
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
AHHH
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
I'm just
not gonna
watch
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Not just figuratively faceless like Sticker Star's.
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
or screenshot
>_>;
breezinabout@msn.com 1:22 pm
Sky whale
Okay, that told me nothing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:22 pm
Who is this person
Oh woah
A blind protagonisty
I thought of that idea before.
RawkHawk2010 1:22 pm
I remember you mentioning that.
Nintendork 13 13 1:22 pm
Yeah.
Except it's in first person
This is in third person
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
This is just...
breezinabout@msn.com 1:23 pm
Very nice music.
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
...that one Mario Galaxy level.
Nintendork 13 13 1:23 pm
And they are
lol
They have trouble seeing 5 feet in front of them
This is that Yoshi's Woolly World level from yesterday
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
Cuphead.
Cue the KoopaTV mug.
Nintendork 13 13 1:23 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
MUGMAN
Nintendork 13 13 1:24 pm
KOOPATV MUGMAN
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
I want this.
Nintendork 13 13 1:24 pm
So we can have our KoopaTV mug as a game protagonist?
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
Yes.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:25 pm
Sure.
Nintendork 13 13 1:25 pm
*clap*
"Coming 1936 (plus eighty years)"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:25 pm
"That's rad, um..."
RawkHawk2010 1:25 pm
That looked good.
Nintendork 13 13 1:25 pm
Weird InDie Microsoft dude ^
"Xbox Game Preview"
So... play alphas?
Pre-alphas?
RawkHawk2010 1:26 pm
We beat them to that.
All of our games are alphas!
breezinabout@msn.com 1:26 pm
Early Access coming to Xbox One. Uh-oh...
Nintendork 13 13 1:26 pm
Woah woah woah TTPO and DAS are done. >_>
"Visionary of Early Access" Dean Hall
RawkHawk2010 1:27 pm
Yeah this is gonna be longer than an hour.
Nintendork 13 13 1:27 pm
So this guy is evil
"I want a gaaaaaame that is not a gaaaaame"
RawkHawk2010 1:27 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:27 pm
"Not build on scripts or keeeeeeeusts"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:27 pm
Pippered
I just love Australians.
Or whatever the heck he is.
Nintendork 13 13 1:28 pm
"deeeestiny"
RawkHawk2010 1:28 pm
space
is this a space mmo
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
dunno gotta refresh twitch
RawkHawk2010 1:29 pm
....that...told me nothing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
Brian Horton from Crystal Dynamics
breezinabout@msn.com 1:29 pm
Tomb Raider!
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
XBOX EXCLUSIVE HOLIDAY 2015
breezinabout@msn.com 1:31 pm
Look's like Lara cut her hair short.
Nintendork 13 13 1:31 pm
Should make Anita happy.
No high heels. :-P
"I can make it!"
RawkHawk2010 1:31 pm
QTEs
Nintendork 13 13 1:31 pm
*reckless crazy jump*
"Holy shit, I don't think I can make that jump!" - Male companion
RawkHawk2010 1:31 pm
is this gameplay?
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
So is this Ice Climbers?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:32 pm
I... can't tell... @Rawk
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
On an HD console?
Lara dies
breezinabout@msn.com 1:32 pm
I assume so, since it has button prompts.
RawkHawk2010 1:32 pm
And Popo is still alive.
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:33 pm
Popo ain't around anymore.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:33 pm
Yeah it's being played right there on stage.
Nintendork 13 13 1:33 pm
ya, qte
And that's why Ice Climbers aren't in Smash 4
RawkHawk2010 1:34 pm
Imagine a legitimate Ice Climber reboot done in this mold.
I'd play it.
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
Ice Climbers sequel before F-Zero?
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
Rise of the Tomb Raider
November 10, 2015
RawkHawk2010 1:35 pm
Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
(Same day as Fallout 4?)
Xbox One exclusive
?Perfect
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
uihuwhwuwhwuwuw
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
Dark
Battletoads
Banjo KAzooie
Pro-Am
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
Conker's Bad Fur Day
breezinabout@msn.com 1:36 pm
Here we go...
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
"You never forget your first game"
"And the more of them you play the more of them you love"
"We were heroes"
Viva Pinata
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
NEW LOGO
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
"You'll see why the best stories will never be forgotten"
"30 hit games"
"Rare Replay - 30 Games, $30"
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
WTF
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
RARE'S BIG PROJECT
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
NUTS
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
IS A COMPILATION
AHAHAHA
breezinabout@msn.com 1:37 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAAHHAHAHAHAAA
YOU GOT NAMCO MUSEUM'D
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Wait
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
August 4, 2015
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Surely that wasn't the only thing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
Craig Duncan, studio head of Rare
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Surely.
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAHAHAHAA
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAHAHAHAAA
YOU'VE BEEN HYPED
FOR NAMCO MUSEUM
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
No way that's the "funnest thing Mayles ever done."
has*
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"Give Rare fans an iconic collection of Rare games"
ahahahahaa
"First look at new exclusive game from Rare"
...wait, I guess there's more.
RawkHawk2010 1:38 pm
TOLD YOU
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"By far the most ambitious game Rare has ever created"
RawkHawk2010 1:38 pm
BITCH
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"Exclusive world premiere"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:38 pm
This'll be it now, for real.
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
Gameplay captured in real-time
First-person
Campfire
Colourful
Got 'em shadows and lighting
Lots of greenery
Birds flapping
Skeleton
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Mr. Ribs.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
With sword through it
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Barrels.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
Carving of a squid?
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Squid Now.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
Random person
Running to pirate ship
With name above their head
Rare's new game is Assassin's Creed Black Flag?
RawkHawk2010 1:40 pm
This is
Nintendork 13 13 1:40 pm
Sea of Thieves
RawkHawk2010 1:41 pm
Well uh
breezinabout@msn.com 1:41 pm
White crew forces sole black man aboard to walk the plank, lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Xbox One and Windows 10 exclusive
"Let me tell you a story of a world of great beauty"
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:41 pm
is this still rare >.>
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Woman with an orb of magic or something
I dunno
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Maybe it's Project Spark
again
"Intruders in a land that does not want them"
(KoopaTV on the Internet?)
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Anyway what we just saw was
"Kinect Sports Rivals: The Adventure Game"
Nintendork 13 13 1:42 pm
Was Assassin's Creed Black Flag with more colour
"Fable Legends"
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Oh god
I thought that was actually gonna be Spark.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:42 pm
Ew, Fable.
Nintendork 13 13 1:42 pm
Microsoft Studios Kudo Tsunoda
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Because the blue ball at the end.
Nintendork 13 13 1:43 pm
"free-to-play" Fable Legends
Sounds gross.
So Xbox One is being merged with Windows 10
"Today we are proud to announce a new relationship with Valve VR"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
*Hesitant applause*
Nintendork 13 13 1:44 pm
"We'll be working closely with Valve to make Windows 10 the best platform for VR gaming." *while having "XBOX" on the screen*
Streaming Xbox One to Oculus Rift through Windows 10
Sounds more confusing than the Nintendo Deluxe Digital Promotion.
"Microsoft HoloLens" "mixed-reality"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
You can bet FB will feature in there somewhere too.
RawkHawk2010 1:44 pm
btw I'd be seriously excited for Rare Replay if it was on Windows 10.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
What a mess.
Nintendork 13 13 1:45 pm
Minecraft garbage
Mojang
uggggggggh
On July 4th and 5th in London
Have biggest Minecraft celebration
Nintendork 13 13 1:46 pm
(MineCon)
(Meanwhile America will be celebrating independence from London)
(And hopefully this Minecraft plague)
RawkHawk2010 1:46 pm
Still can't believe they're selling 30 Rare games for 30 dollars.
Nintendork 13 13 1:46 pm
"A new version of Minecraft built specifically for Hololens"
RawkHawk2010 1:47 pm
That has to be the greatest deal in the history of video games.
Not even debatable.
Nintendork 13 13 1:47 pm
holy shit
breezinabout@msn.com 1:47 pm
how
Nintendork 13 13 1:47 pm
The dude just spawned the fucking hologram onto a table
breezinabout@msn.com 1:47 pm
is this
happening
RawkHawk2010 1:47 pm
what just happened
breezinabout@msn.com 1:48 pm
HE'S DRAGGING THE WORLD
BY HIS FINGERS
RawkHawk2010 1:48 pm
are you supposed to buy that table.
Nintendork 13 13 1:48 pm
No I think it's a random table
"MinecraftChick"
"I'm hopping in a mine cart!" (no she's standing in front of it)
The Minecraft world is moving like a conveyor belt
on a table
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
Oh
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Normal people just see a freak in front of a blank table.
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
I didn't know the guy was actually wearing VR glasses.
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Guy with the Hololens on sees so much more.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:49 pm
So that's a holo-camera they've got there to film all this or something.
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Yeah.
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
is that mario
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
no
Voice commands
"Lightning strike!"
Nintendork 13 13 1:50 pm
Spawned a lightning strike on TNT
"I think the pigs need an upgrade"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:50 pm
Pig murder.
Nintendork 13 13 1:50 pm
*burns the pig farm*
RawkHawk2010 1:51 pm
Fergusson.
Nintendork 13 13 1:51 pm
"Ladies and gentlemen, Gears of War co-creator, Rod Fergusson"
(How fitting.)
"Gears of War ULTIMATE EDITION"
(Remaster)
"Fully rebuilt at 1080p at 60 frames per second in multiplayer!"
One week public beta starting today.
Why do people start betas during E3?
So they don't watch the other conferences?
Nintendork 13 13 1:52 pm
Flashlight
(Candlepower Forums shout-out!)
RawkHawk2010 1:52 pm
The CPFers are probably BEAMING right now.
Nintendork 13 13 1:52 pm
lol, beaming
That's probably gonna be the best part of this trailer.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:53 pm
Two moons, I see.
Dunno if that's normal for Gears...
Nintendork 13 13 1:53 pm
"There's water here."
"Huh. You sure that's safe?"
(Male character is oppressing the female character in a patriarchal fashion this whole time)
RawkHawk2010 1:54 pm
what game is this again
Nintendork 13 13 1:54 pm
Gears of War?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:54 pm
What was the last one? GoW2?
Nintendork 13 13 1:54 pm
The last in the series? I dunno.
RawkHawk2010 1:54 pm
"Gears of War: Judgment"
Nintendork 13 13 1:55 pm
Lightning strikes
(probably from that Minecraft Hololens guy)
RawkHawk2010 1:55 pm
lol
breezinabout@msn.com 1:55 pm
"Stupid GoW stealing our thunder!"
Nintendork 13 13 1:55 pm
"Don't touch it"
*guy touches it*
SHORTED OUT THE FLASHLIGHT
NOOOOOOOOO
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
"I think it shorted out my flashlight!"
"Well, you're glowing now."
breezinabout@msn.com 1:56 pm
D:
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
This protagonist IS a CPFer.
Nintendork 13 13 1:56 pm
Candle Power Forums no longer beaming.
He merged with his flashlight?
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
He cares more about his damn flashlight than anything.
Even his own life.
Nintendork 13 13 1:56 pm
lol
Creepy monster
With like 6 tongues
nope a lot more than 6
Dude isn't glowing anymore.
RawkHawk2010 1:57 pm
Looks like a star-nosed mole.
Nintendork 13 13 1:57 pm
Girl being mauled by monster
Chainsaw
Gears 4
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
Wait.
Was that guy Marcus Fenix?
Nintendork 13 13 1:58 pm
HOLIDAY 2016
dunno
HE TOOK
HIS SHIRT OFF
PHIL SPENCER
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
Phil.
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
wait
it's over?
NO BATTLETOADS?!
breezinabout@msn.com 1:59 pm
It can't go on much longer.
EA starts in an hour.
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
No because Rare is working on Museum.
And Assassin's Creed: Black Flag
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
Battletoads was supposed to be by a third-party!
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
oh
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
Battletoads fans are gonna be PISSED.
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
I dunno.
(So 4chan trolls?)
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
No
Phil himself was hyping it up.
ALL FOR SHOVEL KNIGHT.
FUCK
Nintendork 13 13 2:00 pm
"If you've been waiting to move from your Xbox 360, now's the time."
"More surprises in store this week"
Nintendork 13 13 2:00 pm
"New first party game reveals" this July
along with Scalebound
breezinabout@msn.com 2:00 pm
What idiot wolf-whistled for Windows 10?
Nintendork 13 13 2:01 pm
more car porn
also EA is in 2 hours not 1
RawkHawk2010 2:01 pm
when is ubi
Nintendork 13 13 2:02 pm
in
4 hours
Sony in 7
Conference over.
Nintendork 13 13 2:02 pm
*close Twitch*
RawkHawk2010 2:03 pm
well um
Nintendork 13 13 2:03 pm
Did that live up to your hype and excitement?
Mr. Put-Rare-logos-in-our-logo?
The readers wanna know!
(They also wanna know about if you're a friend or foe)
RawkHawk2010 2:03 pm
I'm still not sure what Sea of Thieves even actually is.
Nintendork 13 13 2:03 pm
It's
uh
Apparently a multiplayer
pirate ship game
breezinabout@msn.com 2:04 pm
Names above heads suggests... MMO? IDK.
Nintendork 13 13 2:04 pm
Where one group of pirates
attack another group of pirates
All controlled by players
and maybe NPCs
Or something.
RawkHawk2010 2:04 pm
Well see
A few days ago I was like
RawkHawk2010 2:05 pm
"What if Rare just took these Kinect Sports Rivals assets they worked so hard on and made an actual adventure game out of them?"
AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE.
breezinabout@msn.com 2:06 pm
Did they even mention the Kinect once in this whole show?
Nintendork 13 13 2:06 pm
Not by name
but they used its features.
(Screenshot-ception)
RawkHawk2010 2:06 pm
http://www.rare.co.uk/
this is still the same
lol
https://twitter.com/RareLtd/status/610501628433682432
Nintendork 13 13 2:06 pm
"10,000 gamerscore"
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Nuts & Bolts Banjo, front and center.
Nintendork 13 13 2:07 pm
Why is this a selling point?
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Hey, Rare's gotta do what they gotta do.
Nintendork 13 13 2:07 pm
That's disgusting.
-_-
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Honestly, my favorite moment from the whole show is when feed of Nuts & Bolts was featured for like...a second.
Nintendork 13 13 2:08 pm
Honestly
I was most impressed by
the
uh
Minecraft Hololens thing.
RawkHawk2010 2:08 pm
Honestly
I'm really excited that, uh, things look optimistic for classic Rare IP.
But uh...
RawkHawk2010 2:09 pm
...I don't think that was the way to usher in a new era.
Is Sea of Thieves the funnest game Mayles has ever worked on?
Nintendork 13 13 2:09 pm
A new era by ushering in old franchises.
RawkHawk2010 2:09 pm
Maybe.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
Sounds like Hillary Clinton's campaign.
(Jeb Bush, too.)
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
But I couldn't have figured that out from that trailer alone.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
(bam, full circle)
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
Not disappointed though.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
Is there a chance that Nintendo could win E3 for you?
Now that you know what they gotta beat?
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
It's just I'm filled with even more suspense after watching than before.
and yes.
Nintendork 13 13 2:11 pm
(Readers: That's a very scary thing, since Rawk was in big suspense for MONTHS leading up to this.)
RawkHawk2010 2:12 pm
https://twitter.com/RareLtd/status/610501628433682432
Every one of those models is reused artwork EXCEPT Zits the Battletoad.
So hmm.
Wait.
Nintendork 13 13 2:14 pm
wot
RawkHawk2010 2:14 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 2:14 pm
?
RawkHawk2010 2:15 pm
Is Rare Replay gonna be rated M because of Conker?!
Nintendork 13 13 2:15 pm
lol
Guess so.
RawkHawk2010 2:15 pm
oh my god
RawkHawk2010 2:18 pm
Well Sea of Thieves is trending.
Nintendork 13 13 2:19 pm
Guess that's... worth something.
Rare is trending.
Cuphead is
The Division is
Xbox E3 is
Guess you can say... Rare stole the conference!
You better stay tuned for the next E3 conference of the day! KoopaTV will cover it, too!
Bethesda's conference is over this way.
Do you REALLY wanna see EA's conference? Well, it's here.
Want a blast to the past? Check out Microsoft's 2014 conference!
How about the future? Phil Spencer is back in 2016!
We make fun of the "world premiere" here.
Chad and Hyle talked about the idea of Phil walking on stage shirtless.
With a sharktooth necklace and yellow shorts.
Nintendork 13 13 12:19 pm
...now it froze
RawkHawk2010 12:19 pm
And then he'd be like,
"Here's Battletoads!"
RawkHawk2010 12:21 pm
K I'm on Twitch.
8 MINUTES
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
so what'd you have to say
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
Oh, we're live?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
yeh
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
I feel bad we Greg Gutfeld'd Bethesda
But we'll give freaking EA our undivided attention.
Is that like, a form of E3 hazing?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
Hey.
Nintendork 13 13 12:23 pm
The freshman conference gets hazed?
RawkHawk2010 12:23 pm
That's what Bethesda gets for their timing.
Nintendork 13 13 12:24 pm
To be fair, Bethesda has much more friendly timing.
People who actually have day jobs can't watch E3.
RawkHawk2010 12:24 pm
(We also don't really care about Bethesda and never will.)
Nintendork 13 13 12:24 pm
(Except Sony)
(I thought Fallout Shelter was cute!)
Hey, did you read the captions to the screenshots in the logs?
I got some pretty good ones.
RawkHawk2010 12:25 pm
I will.
RawkHawk2010 12:25 pm
I dreamt last night that Phil was on The Greg Gutfeld Show.
And he pulled a zipper on his back to reveal himself as actually being Silent Hillary.
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
......
Oh yeah, Jeb Bush announces his campaign today.
RawkHawk2010 12:26 pm
PFFT
When?!
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
Uhhh
RawkHawk2010 12:26 pm
We ain't watchin' that.
Nintendork 13 13 12:26 pm
I know
RawkHawk2010 12:27 pm
Music changed!
Nintendork 13 13 12:27 pm
I'm looking
no one gives a time
So I guess it's a Hillary-esque thing
Apparently
Monday afternoon
at Miami Dade College
RawkHawk2010 12:28 pm
I'm so uncomfortably excited.
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
Where's Vortex?
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
Or Kamek?
breezinabout@msn.com 12:29 pm
YO.
Nintendork 13 13 12:29 pm
...
I found Vortex.
:-P
http://www.twitch.tv/xbox
There's weird music
but at least it's loud.
Unlike the Nintendo World Championships.
RawkHawk2010 12:30 pm
Yeah, fuck that noise.
Nintendork 13 13 12:30 pm
it stopped
...oh wait no that was my browser
OH
RawkHawk2010 12:30 pm
IT BEGINS.
Nintendork 13 13 12:30 pm
APPLAUSE
E-M
Raining
RawkHawk2010 12:31 pm
Forza
Nintendork 13 13 12:31 pm
"Discover, explore" *cut to FORZA*
RawkHawk2010 12:31 pm
Gears
Halo
Nintendork 13 13 12:31 pm
Fat generic white guy
oh that's Gears
Kinda looked like Packie from the Nintendo World Championships
but with muscles over fat.
RawkHawk2010 12:32 pm
lolololol
which one of these is the rare guy
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:32 pm
"Jump ahead."
RawkHawk2010 12:32 pm
Look for Phil's shirt.
Nintendork 13 13 12:32 pm
Some googly-eyed freak wouldn't look right.
Xbox E3 2015 Briefing
Should I not call it the Microsoft conference?
Welcome Bonnie Ross
(Better than Cammie freaking Dunaway)
"The characters, the games, and the stories that people love"
She mentioned characters before games?
(Jab at Miyamoto?)
RawkHawk2010 12:33 pm
2015 - greatest lineup in Xbox history.
Nintendork 13 13 12:33 pm
Best exclusive games launching THIS year.
Nintendork 13 13 12:33 pm
Open with Halo 5
RawkHawk2010 12:33 pm
Halo 5.
Oh hey I'm actually sort of interested.
 |
| October 27, 2015: Halo 5 Guardians. |
Nintendork 13 13 12:34 pm
"Master Chief... hero... or traitor?"
(Edward Snowden?)
"Friend... or foe?" (Al Sharpton?)
RawkHawk2010 12:34 pm
"I wanna know!"
Nintendork 13 13 12:34 pm
"Every target is just another target, buck."
Master Chief absent without leave.
(Kamek?)
"Coming This Holiday, Pre-Order Now"
(The trailer just started!)
...(oh nope it's gameplay)
Oh, the dude's actual name is "Buck"
RawkHawk2010 12:35 pm
Reminds me of Beck.
Nintendork 13 13 12:35 pm
There's a "Tanaka"
RawkHawk2010 12:35 pm
Well, there's a lot of purple.
Nintendork 13 13 12:35 pm
(ain't that a Nintendo employee?)
RawkHawk2010 12:36 pm
You should like that.
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
I do.
There was some punk who just burned in a purple fire.
breezinabout@msn.com 12:36 pm
LOL "I regret everything!"
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
(in the game)
breezinabout@msn.com 12:36 pm
I didn't think Halo was capable of humour.
Nintendork 13 13 12:36 pm
"Keep your head down and run!"
(How do you know what's ahead of you?)
"I'm okay! Keep going!" *almost died and is dangling off cliff*
RawkHawk2010 12:37 pm
Prometheans.
Nintendork 13 13 12:37 pm
Shots fired.
Nintendork 13 13 12:37 pm
"ugh, I'm down" - token woman
(first and only person down)
So your player character is giving orders.
It's usually an NPC who is the captain.
RawkHawk2010 12:38 pm
That's basically the opposite of Reach.
Where every NPC is bossing you around because you're a newb.
Nintendork 13 13 12:39 pm
Yeah. Call of Duty did that too.
RawkHawk2010 12:39 pm
That melee strike was pretty cool.
Nintendork 13 13 12:39 pm
They must love these voice modifiers.
"Your passage is gonna be denied tonight motherfucker"
RawkHawk2010 12:40 pm
Good on MS for putting a trailer after the gameplay.
Most of the time the gameplay just ends abruptly and that's the end of the showcase.
Nintendork 13 13 12:40 pm
Control two Spartan squads with drop-in/drop-out
Epic scale of campaign carries to multiplayer.
Massive environments 4 times the size of any previous Halo map
And playable at E3.
(...guess we gotta get passes next year)
RawkHawk2010 12:41 pm
Hell yeah.
Nintendork 13 13 12:41 pm
Player vs. Player now Player vs. Everything
"WARZONE"
RawkHawk2010 12:41 pm
VEHICLES
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
"WHERE EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE"
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
Did you see that Warthog careen through there?
That's what I want.
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
Xbox 1 exclusive world premiere
Microsoft Studios
wot's this
No segue
Just another trailer
Walking through snow
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
is this rare
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
with a robot
wtf
Keiji Inafune
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
WTF
Nintendork 13 13 12:42 pm
and the makers of Metroid Prime?!
RawkHawk2010 12:42 pm
I thought he was
breezinabout@msn.com 12:43 pm
Makers of Metroid Prime?!
RawkHawk2010 12:43 pm
What happened to Mighty No. 9?!
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
What what whaaaaaat
breezinabout@msn.com 12:43 pm
You have my attention.
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
(Well that's why there's a robotic dog)
Female protagonist
RawkHawk2010 12:43 pm
So is this woman a Samus expy?
 |
| Recore from Comcept's protagonists. |
Nintendork 13 13 12:43 pm
Samus expy with Rush expy
Grappling hook
"NO!!!"
RUSH EXPLODED
RawkHawk2010 12:44 pm
Violins.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
Samus expy seems distraught
RawkHawk2010 12:44 pm
Good.
Good on violins.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
Rush expy left a core orb
Samus expy puts it in some conveniently place mecha
breezinabout@msn.com 12:44 pm
Microsoft just loves their "sad for dogs" moments.
Nintendork 13 13 12:44 pm
"Welcome back buddy."
Quadraxis?!!?
RECORE
Spring 2016
The game is called Recore
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
PHIL
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
PHIL SPENCER
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
PHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL
WHERE'S HIS SHIRT
AHAHAHHAHH
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Blocked
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
THAT'S RARE
It's gotta be.
It's GOLD!
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Comcept
and Armature
First party franchise for Xbox 1
exclusive
RawkHawk2010 12:45 pm
didn't they make star fox
oh wait that was argonaut
Nintendork 13 13 12:45 pm
Microsoft got a Japanese studio?
First party exclusives everywhere
Nintendork 13 13 12:46 pm
Depth, breadth, and diversity
breezinabout@msn.com 12:46 pm
$10 says Phil eventually unzips to reveal that logo.
RawkHawk2010 12:46 pm
#IStandWithPhil
Nintendork 13 13 12:46 pm
Batman
breezinabout@msn.com 12:46 pm
Exactly.
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
XBOX ONE
BACKWARDS
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
BACKWARDS COMPATIBILITY
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
COMPATIBILITY
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
HOLY SHIT.
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
XBOX 360 PLAYABLE ON XBOX
one
Playable NATIVELY
RawkHawk2010 12:47 pm
DON MATTRICK OWNED.
Nintendork 13 13 12:47 pm
Please welcome Mike Ubara
To show us backwards compatibility in action
oh wow this guy's voice
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
This guy's voice.
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Mike Ybarra"
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
Mike Ybarra's
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Head of platform engineering"
One of his favourite games
Mass Effect on Xbox 1
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
"Game runs exactly like it does on Xbox 360... BUT BETTER"
"Xbox take a screenshot"
RawkHawk2010 12:48 pm
whoaaaaaaah.
Xbox One features implemented.
Nintendork 13 13 12:48 pm
I took a screenshot
of Xbox taking a screenshot
 |
| Screenshots of screenshot taking. |
breezinabout@msn.com 12:49 pm
Yo dawg.
RawkHawk2010 12:49 pm
Why can't Nintendo do this?
You have to fucking rebuy Super Mario Galaxy if you want to Miiverse it!
Nintendork 13 13 12:49 pm
"We won't charge you to play games you already own"
(Dammit Nintendo)
Those audience members are creepy
RawkHawk2010 12:49 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 12:49 pm
on the sides of Phil Spencer.
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
CHAD AND HYLE
Chad and Hyle were in the audience.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
Xbox Elite Wireless controller
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
Front row.
ahahahahahahaha.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
...(well they're creepy!)
wtf the controller was revving an engine
"Pro-level precision"
"Hair trigger locks"
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
(I dson't get it)
Game-changing accuracy
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
I wish Nuts & Bolts had been the game demo'd for BC.
Nintendork 13 13 12:50 pm
"Swappable components"
RawkHawk2010 12:50 pm
Just to terrify everyone.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
"Limitless customisation"
You can take the buttons off the controller
and literally reconfigure them?
...What's the point of that? >_>
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
Well I'm already losing my 3DS buttons.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
wtf Todd Howard from Bethesda is back?
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
As are you.
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
:-(
RawkHawk2010 12:51 pm
wtf Bethesda
BESTHESDA HAD THEIR TIME
Nintendork 13 13 12:51 pm
Fallout 4
BETHESDA DUDE SAID HE ONLY WANTED ONE FALLOUT DEMO
SO THAT'S WHY THEY HAD A CONFERENCE
SO WHAT'S THIS
THIS IS A SECOND DEMO
RawkHawk2010 12:52 pm
(See, that log should have been dedicated entirely to Gutfeld.)
Nintendork 13 13 12:52 pm
(lol)
Nintendork 13 13 12:52 pm
ahhh
hE NAMED IT PHIL SPENCER
The Pip Boy
RawkHawk2010 12:52 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
(Charssie said it's called "Pip Boy" not "Pit Boy")
RawkHawk2010 12:53 pm
Yeah that's what I hear.
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
family robot creepy
"you're still here, so other people can still be here..."
breezinabout@msn.com 12:53 pm
Why does he sound like John Cleese?
Nintendork 13 13 12:53 pm
(IT'S A ROBOT)
RawkHawk2010 12:54 pm
More dog.
Nintendork 13 13 12:54 pm
Random dog
"You wanna come with me, pal?"
"woof"
"Oh well, let's go together."
And right after that
the dog goes out and mauls random humans
RawkHawk2010 12:54 pm
That dog looks just like door-lifting one from Call of Duty: Ghosts.
Nintendork 13 13 12:55 pm
Ya, Riley.
(The dog)
Herman Cain expy
 |
| Which black person does this look like to you? |
RawkHawk2010 12:55 pm
This black guy looks like Confederado Reggie.
Nintendork 13 13 12:55 pm
lol
Dude these "raiders" you're shooting
Your player seems more of a raider than they are.
RawkHawk2010 12:56 pm
dinosaurs
Nintendork 13 13 12:56 pm
Especially since you literally scrap random metal and buildings.
The same random walking montage from last night
Nintendork 13 13 12:57 pm
"Xbox Exclusive Offer: Fallout 3 is packaged with Fallout 4"
"Mods created on the PC, able to be transferred and played for free on Xbox One"
Peter Moore, chief operating officer of Electronic Arts
RawkHawk2010 12:58 pm
Peter Moore
Nintendork 13 13 12:58 pm
(HEY, THIS GUY IS COMING UP NEXT)
(WHAT'S HE DOING HERE)
RawkHawk2010 12:58 pm
Welcome home, Peter.
Nintendork 13 13 12:58 pm
...
Oh yeah, EA Access.
I wrote something criticising that.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Peter used to be in Phil's place.
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
"I know a lot of you want to play Madden NFL 16!"
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Are they really saving Rare for the end? Ahahaha.
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
*lukewarm audience*
We're only half an hour in.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
how long is this
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
Unknown.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 12:59 pm
KoopaTV schedule has a question mark for end time.
RawkHawk2010 12:59 pm
Oh god
I thought they were announcing an Attack on Titan game.
Nintendork 13 13 1:00 pm
Nah, Titanfall and Dragon Age Inquisition to the EA Access Vault.
"This week, in celebration of E3, we're opening up the EA Access Vault to ALL Xbox Gold members"
"For free! All week long."
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
that ain't me.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:01 pm
"Scant applause"
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
Ooh, Plants vs. Zombies.
Garden Warfare 2.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
"Because of your passion for the insanely fun Plants vs. Zombie franchise, I'm pleased to announce today Plants vs. Zombies Garden Warfare 2"
RawkHawk2010 1:01 pm
We were supposed to play the first one.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
...oh yeah.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:01 pm
...
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
Well he'll talk more about it next conference.
Nintendork 13 13 1:01 pm
"World premiere trailer"
What's he gonna leave for his own conference?
Talking about FIFA's grass?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:02 pm
Pirate zombie!
RawkHawk2010 1:02 pm
This reminds me of Ghoulies.
A lot.
Not even the characters.
But the environments.
 |
| "You're a plant now!" "You're a zombie now!" "You're a plant!" "You're a zombie!" "You're a plant!" "You're a zombie!" |
breezinabout@msn.com 1:03 pm
lol, Danger Zone playing in the background
RawkHawk2010 1:03 pm
Ludwig
Fruit Dudes.
That was...
...whoever our Orange is.
Nintendork 13 13 1:03 pm
...
We have an Orange?
I thought we had a Mango
RawkHawk2010 1:03 pm
Oh.
Mango Mang?
Nintendork 13 13 1:03 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
We'll talk about it later.
We gotta look at cars.
FORZA Motorsport 6
On-stage cars?
YUP
breezinabout@msn.com 1:04 pm
*Snore*
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
"The GT is back"
*Dragon Ball fans moan*
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
It's not an E3 without car porn.
 |
| Your car porn of the day. ...Well we'll probably see more in other conferences. |
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
Jesus Chirst
Dude
s
What if those cables just...broke.
Nintendork 13 13 1:04 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:04 pm
While it was being lifted down.
Would have been amazing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
That's why there is E3 rehearsal.
RawkHawk2010 1:05 pm
Henry Ford III is there?!
Didn't even know he existed.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
Sell-out. <_<
breezinabout@msn.com 1:05 pm
"Thanks Henry", he says in the most apathetic tone of voice EVER.
Nintendork 13 13 1:05 pm
Forza Motorsport 6 Xbox One exclusive.
THE CAR IS BEING LIFTED AWAY
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
"Oh beautiful it issss~~~"
RawkHawk2010 1:06 pm
And it was blocking the screen.
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
*while showing the car in different angles*
My gosh these car pornographers are shameless.
RawkHawk2010 1:06 pm
where's the autopegging
Nintendork 13 13 1:06 pm
"1080p 60 fps REALISM"
(Is real life in 1080p and 60 fps?)
breezinabout@msn.com 1:06 pm
1080p, 60fps? I'll believe that when I see it.
Nintendork 13 13 1:07 pm
How many frames per second is real life? >_>
"World premiere"
This could be anything!
BANDAI NAMCO
breezinabout@msn.com 1:07 pm
However many the eye can manage I guess.
RawkHawk2010 1:07 pm
Not anymore!
Nintendork 13 13 1:07 pm
Developed by FromSoftware
(Dammit Namco we had something going on together!)
RawkHawk2010 1:07 pm
So, Souls.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:07 pm
Dark Souls III?
RawkHawk2010 1:08 pm
I didn't think From Software was this big.
They've been doing like three or four games at once.
Including that Monster Hunter.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
Cue ominous Latin chanting.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Is there any non-ominous Latin chanting?
RawkHawk2010 1:09 pm
(Read KoopaTV in Latin, kids. It's fun.)
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
lol, good point.
And yeah, listen to Rawk.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Is this the same game they just showed
RawkHawk2010 1:09 pm
No idea.
lol
breezinabout@msn.com 1:09 pm
Can't be.
Nintendork 13 13 1:09 pm
Ubisoft
Tom Clancy's
OH
OHHHHH
OHHHHHHH
THE DIVISION
World premiere?!?
 |
| Tom Clancy's The Division: When Society Falls We Rise. |
breezinabout@msn.com 1:10 pm
DIVISION
RawkHawk2010 1:10 pm
.....what?
Nintendork 13 13 1:10 pm
We've known about it since E3 2013!
How is it a world premiere?!
RawkHawk2010 1:10 pm
I thought this was already OUT.
Nintendork 13 13 1:10 pm
No, it's not out.
I dunno when it's coming out.
"We...are the DIVISION"
"We don't know how many of us there are."
RawkHawk2010 1:11 pm
So does "World Premiere" mean anything anymore.
Nintendork 13 13 1:11 pm
no
Please welcome Laurent Detoc from Ubisoft
"Bonjour!"
RawkHawk2010 1:11 pm
They really are saving Rare for the ened.
end*
Nintendork 13 13 1:12 pm
Exclusive Beta first on Xbox One this December
(so not coming out until 2016)
RawkHawk2010 1:12 pm
If that.
Nintendork 13 13 1:13 pm
Maybe it'll come out on the NX.
Rainbow Six stuff
RawkHawk2010 1:13 pm
what if "NX" stands for
"Nintendo Xbox"
Because Phil bought them?
Nintendork 13 13 1:14 pm
............................
:|
"Go!" "Got 'em!"
"Got 'em!" "Got 'em!"
I like Ubisoft's player dialogue trailers
They're so polite.
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
"Yeeeeeeah, nice shot!"
*trailer ends*
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
Windows 10 and Xbox 1 Exclusive
Motiga?
Colourful environments
breezinabout@msn.com 1:15 pm
What have we here...
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
"MEET YOUR GUARDIAN"
"CHOOSE YOUR HERO"
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
Good thing they said who made this prior.
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:15 pm
I might've thought this was Rare.
Nintendork 13 13 1:15 pm
IT's cel-shaded
I think
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
I like these character designs.
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
"Gigantic"
 |
| Ludwig's browser froze here so let's take a picture. |
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
And music.
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
it froze at
"Gigantic - Windows 10 & Xbox One Exclusive"
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
Valoo
Nintendork 13 13 1:16 pm
Firefox at 40% CPU usage
RawkHawk2010 1:16 pm
Cuphead.
Whoa
I just heard a Koopa shell noise.
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
whaaat
*force-quits Firefox*
*reload*
RawkHawk2010 1:17 pm
Yeah, it was some Indie game.
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
What the hell am I looking at now
breezinabout@msn.com 1:17 pm
Too many games... Can't process...
Nintendork 13 13 1:17 pm
Is this an indie montage
"ID @ Xbox"
(ID... InDie?)
RawkHawk2010 1:18 pm
Well that was a more interesting Indie reel than Nintendo ever had.
Steve Gaynor.
*stifles a laugh*
RawkHawk2010 1:20 pm
what is this
Nintendork 13 13 1:20 pm
I dunno
breezinabout@msn.com 1:20 pm
So... Gone Home IN SPAAAAACE?!
Oh It's already over...
Nintendork 13 13 1:20 pm
I'm using this time to get the screenshots up to where the log is now.
More "friend or foe" stuff
Al Sharpton a thought leader.
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Thought the bird screech was a baby crying.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
Ditto.
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Whoa.
These characters are LITERALLY faceless.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
FACELESS PEOPLE
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
...
uh
breezinabout@msn.com 1:21 pm
AHHH
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
I'm just
not gonna
watch
RawkHawk2010 1:21 pm
Not just figuratively faceless like Sticker Star's.
Nintendork 13 13 1:21 pm
or screenshot
>_>;
breezinabout@msn.com 1:22 pm
Sky whale
Okay, that told me nothing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:22 pm
Who is this person
Oh woah
A blind protagonisty
I thought of that idea before.
RawkHawk2010 1:22 pm
I remember you mentioning that.
Nintendork 13 13 1:22 pm
Yeah.
Except it's in first person
This is in third person
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
This is just...
breezinabout@msn.com 1:23 pm
Very nice music.
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
...that one Mario Galaxy level.
Nintendork 13 13 1:23 pm
And they are
lol
They have trouble seeing 5 feet in front of them
This is that Yoshi's Woolly World level from yesterday
RawkHawk2010 1:23 pm
Cuphead.
Cue the KoopaTV mug.
 |
| Buy the KoopaTV mug at the KoopaTV Store, here! |
Nintendork 13 13 1:23 pm
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
MUGMAN
Nintendork 13 13 1:24 pm
KOOPATV MUGMAN
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
I want this.
Nintendork 13 13 1:24 pm
So we can have our KoopaTV mug as a game protagonist?
RawkHawk2010 1:24 pm
Yes.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:25 pm
Sure.
Nintendork 13 13 1:25 pm
*clap*
"Coming 1936 (plus eighty years)"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:25 pm
"That's rad, um..."
RawkHawk2010 1:25 pm
That looked good.
Nintendork 13 13 1:25 pm
Weird InDie Microsoft dude ^
"Xbox Game Preview"
So... play alphas?
Pre-alphas?
RawkHawk2010 1:26 pm
We beat them to that.
All of our games are alphas!
breezinabout@msn.com 1:26 pm
Early Access coming to Xbox One. Uh-oh...
Nintendork 13 13 1:26 pm
Woah woah woah TTPO and DAS are done. >_>
"Visionary of Early Access" Dean Hall
RawkHawk2010 1:27 pm
Yeah this is gonna be longer than an hour.
Nintendork 13 13 1:27 pm
So this guy is evil
"I want a gaaaaaame that is not a gaaaaame"
RawkHawk2010 1:27 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:27 pm
"Not build on scripts or keeeeeeeusts"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:27 pm
Pippered
I just love Australians.
Or whatever the heck he is.
Nintendork 13 13 1:28 pm
"deeeestiny"
RawkHawk2010 1:28 pm
space
is this a space mmo
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
dunno gotta refresh twitch
RawkHawk2010 1:29 pm
....that...told me nothing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
Brian Horton from Crystal Dynamics
breezinabout@msn.com 1:29 pm
Tomb Raider!
Nintendork 13 13 1:29 pm
XBOX EXCLUSIVE HOLIDAY 2015
breezinabout@msn.com 1:31 pm
Look's like Lara cut her hair short.
Nintendork 13 13 1:31 pm
Should make Anita happy.
No high heels. :-P
"I can make it!"
RawkHawk2010 1:31 pm
QTEs
Nintendork 13 13 1:31 pm
*reckless crazy jump*
"Holy shit, I don't think I can make that jump!" - Male companion
RawkHawk2010 1:31 pm
is this gameplay?
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
So is this Ice Climbers?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:32 pm
I... can't tell... @Rawk
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
On an HD console?
Lara dies
breezinabout@msn.com 1:32 pm
I assume so, since it has button prompts.
RawkHawk2010 1:32 pm
And Popo is still alive.
Nintendork 13 13 1:32 pm
lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:33 pm
Popo ain't around anymore.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:33 pm
Yeah it's being played right there on stage.
Nintendork 13 13 1:33 pm
ya, qte
And that's why Ice Climbers aren't in Smash 4
 |
| Nana and Popo couldn't do what Lara Croft can. |
RawkHawk2010 1:34 pm
Imagine a legitimate Ice Climber reboot done in this mold.
I'd play it.
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
Ice Climbers sequel before F-Zero?
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
Rise of the Tomb Raider
November 10, 2015
RawkHawk2010 1:35 pm
Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
Nintendork 13 13 1:35 pm
(Same day as Fallout 4?)
Xbox One exclusive
?Perfect
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
uihuwhwuwhwuwuw
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
Dark
Battletoads
Banjo KAzooie
Pro-Am
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
Conker's Bad Fur Day
breezinabout@msn.com 1:36 pm
Here we go...
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
"You never forget your first game"
"And the more of them you play the more of them you love"
"We were heroes"
Viva Pinata
RawkHawk2010 1:36 pm
NEW LOGO
 |
| That's right: Rare is back. But are they better than ever? |
Nintendork 13 13 1:36 pm
"You'll see why the best stories will never be forgotten"
"30 hit games"
"Rare Replay - 30 Games, $30"
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
WTF
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
RARE'S BIG PROJECT
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
NUTS
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
IS A COMPILATION
AHAHAHA
breezinabout@msn.com 1:37 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAAHHAHAHAHAAA
YOU GOT NAMCO MUSEUM'D
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Wait
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
August 4, 2015
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Surely that wasn't the only thing.
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
Craig Duncan, studio head of Rare
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
Surely.
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAHAHAHAA
Nintendork 13 13 1:37 pm
HAHAHAHAAA
YOU'VE BEEN HYPED
FOR NAMCO MUSEUM
RawkHawk2010 1:37 pm
No way that's the "funnest thing Mayles ever done."
has*
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"Give Rare fans an iconic collection of Rare games"
ahahahahaa
"First look at new exclusive game from Rare"
...wait, I guess there's more.
RawkHawk2010 1:38 pm
TOLD YOU
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"By far the most ambitious game Rare has ever created"
RawkHawk2010 1:38 pm
BITCH
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
"Exclusive world premiere"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:38 pm
This'll be it now, for real.
Nintendork 13 13 1:38 pm
Gameplay captured in real-time
First-person
Campfire
Colourful
Got 'em shadows and lighting
Lots of greenery
Birds flapping
Skeleton
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Mr. Ribs.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
With sword through it
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Barrels.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
Carving of a squid?
RawkHawk2010 1:39 pm
Squid Now.
Nintendork 13 13 1:39 pm
Random person
Running to pirate ship
With name above their head
Rare's new game is Assassin's Creed Black Flag?
RawkHawk2010 1:40 pm
This is
Nintendork 13 13 1:40 pm
Sea of Thieves
 |
| Sea of Thieves logo. |
RawkHawk2010 1:41 pm
Well uh
breezinabout@msn.com 1:41 pm
White crew forces sole black man aboard to walk the plank, lol
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Xbox One and Windows 10 exclusive
"Let me tell you a story of a world of great beauty"
lol
RawkHawk2010 1:41 pm
is this still rare >.>
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Woman with an orb of magic or something
I dunno
Nintendork 13 13 1:41 pm
Maybe it's Project Spark
again
"Intruders in a land that does not want them"
(KoopaTV on the Internet?)
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Anyway what we just saw was
"Kinect Sports Rivals: The Adventure Game"
Nintendork 13 13 1:42 pm
Was Assassin's Creed Black Flag with more colour
"Fable Legends"
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Oh god
I thought that was actually gonna be Spark.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:42 pm
Ew, Fable.
Nintendork 13 13 1:42 pm
Microsoft Studios Kudo Tsunoda
RawkHawk2010 1:42 pm
Because the blue ball at the end.
Nintendork 13 13 1:43 pm
"free-to-play" Fable Legends
Sounds gross.
So Xbox One is being merged with Windows 10
"Today we are proud to announce a new relationship with Valve VR"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
*Hesitant applause*
Nintendork 13 13 1:44 pm
"We'll be working closely with Valve to make Windows 10 the best platform for VR gaming." *while having "XBOX" on the screen*
Streaming Xbox One to Oculus Rift through Windows 10
Sounds more confusing than the Nintendo Deluxe Digital Promotion.
"Microsoft HoloLens" "mixed-reality"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
You can bet FB will feature in there somewhere too.
RawkHawk2010 1:44 pm
btw I'd be seriously excited for Rare Replay if it was on Windows 10.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:44 pm
What a mess.
Nintendork 13 13 1:45 pm
Minecraft garbage
Mojang
uggggggggh
On July 4th and 5th in London
Have biggest Minecraft celebration
Nintendork 13 13 1:46 pm
(MineCon)
(Meanwhile America will be celebrating independence from London)
(And hopefully this Minecraft plague)
RawkHawk2010 1:46 pm
Still can't believe they're selling 30 Rare games for 30 dollars.
Nintendork 13 13 1:46 pm
"A new version of Minecraft built specifically for Hololens"
 |
| Hololens Minecraft. Note how it's on the wall. For now. |
RawkHawk2010 1:47 pm
That has to be the greatest deal in the history of video games.
Not even debatable.
Nintendork 13 13 1:47 pm
holy shit
breezinabout@msn.com 1:47 pm
how
Nintendork 13 13 1:47 pm
The dude just spawned the fucking hologram onto a table
breezinabout@msn.com 1:47 pm
is this
happening
RawkHawk2010 1:47 pm
what just happened
 |
| HE MOVED THE Minecraft FROM THE WALL TO THE TABLE?! |
breezinabout@msn.com 1:48 pm
HE'S DRAGGING THE WORLD
BY HIS FINGERS
RawkHawk2010 1:48 pm
are you supposed to buy that table.
Nintendork 13 13 1:48 pm
No I think it's a random table
"MinecraftChick"
"I'm hopping in a mine cart!" (no she's standing in front of it)
The Minecraft world is moving like a conveyor belt
on a table
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
Oh
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Normal people just see a freak in front of a blank table.
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
I didn't know the guy was actually wearing VR glasses.
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Guy with the Hololens on sees so much more.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:49 pm
So that's a holo-camera they've got there to film all this or something.
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
Yeah.
RawkHawk2010 1:49 pm
is that mario
Nintendork 13 13 1:49 pm
no
Voice commands
"Lightning strike!"
Nintendork 13 13 1:50 pm
Spawned a lightning strike on TNT
"I think the pigs need an upgrade"
breezinabout@msn.com 1:50 pm
Pig murder.
Nintendork 13 13 1:50 pm
*burns the pig farm*
RawkHawk2010 1:51 pm
Fergusson.
Nintendork 13 13 1:51 pm
"Ladies and gentlemen, Gears of War co-creator, Rod Fergusson"
(How fitting.)
"Gears of War ULTIMATE EDITION"
(Remaster)
"Fully rebuilt at 1080p at 60 frames per second in multiplayer!"
One week public beta starting today.
Why do people start betas during E3?
So they don't watch the other conferences?
 |
| Gears 4 flashlight action. Shout-out to CandlePowerForums. |
Nintendork 13 13 1:52 pm
Flashlight
(Candlepower Forums shout-out!)
RawkHawk2010 1:52 pm
The CPFers are probably BEAMING right now.
Nintendork 13 13 1:52 pm
lol, beaming
That's probably gonna be the best part of this trailer.
breezinabout@msn.com 1:53 pm
Two moons, I see.
Dunno if that's normal for Gears...
Nintendork 13 13 1:53 pm
"There's water here."
"Huh. You sure that's safe?"
(Male character is oppressing the female character in a patriarchal fashion this whole time)
RawkHawk2010 1:54 pm
what game is this again
Nintendork 13 13 1:54 pm
Gears of War?
breezinabout@msn.com 1:54 pm
What was the last one? GoW2?
Nintendork 13 13 1:54 pm
The last in the series? I dunno.
RawkHawk2010 1:54 pm
"Gears of War: Judgment"
Nintendork 13 13 1:55 pm
Lightning strikes
(probably from that Minecraft Hololens guy)
RawkHawk2010 1:55 pm
lol
breezinabout@msn.com 1:55 pm
"Stupid GoW stealing our thunder!"
Nintendork 13 13 1:55 pm
"Don't touch it"
*guy touches it*
SHORTED OUT THE FLASHLIGHT
NOOOOOOOOO
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
"I think it shorted out my flashlight!"
"Well, you're glowing now."
breezinabout@msn.com 1:56 pm
D:
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
This protagonist IS a CPFer.
Nintendork 13 13 1:56 pm
Candle Power Forums no longer beaming.
He merged with his flashlight?
RawkHawk2010 1:56 pm
He cares more about his damn flashlight than anything.
Even his own life.
Nintendork 13 13 1:56 pm
lol
Creepy monster
With like 6 tongues
nope a lot more than 6
Dude isn't glowing anymore.
RawkHawk2010 1:57 pm
Looks like a star-nosed mole.
Nintendork 13 13 1:57 pm
Girl being mauled by monster
Chainsaw
Gears 4
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
Wait.
Was that guy Marcus Fenix?
Nintendork 13 13 1:58 pm
HOLIDAY 2016
dunno
HE TOOK
HIS SHIRT OFF
PHIL SPENCER
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
Phil.
RawkHawk2010 1:58 pm
wait
it's over?
NO BATTLETOADS?!
breezinabout@msn.com 1:59 pm
It can't go on much longer.
EA starts in an hour.
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
No because Rare is working on Museum.
And Assassin's Creed: Black Flag
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
Battletoads was supposed to be by a third-party!
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
oh
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
Battletoads fans are gonna be PISSED.
Nintendork 13 13 1:59 pm
I dunno.
(So 4chan trolls?)
RawkHawk2010 1:59 pm
No
Phil himself was hyping it up.
ALL FOR SHOVEL KNIGHT.
FUCK
Nintendork 13 13 2:00 pm
"If you've been waiting to move from your Xbox 360, now's the time."
"More surprises in store this week"
Nintendork 13 13 2:00 pm
"New first party game reveals" this July
along with Scalebound
breezinabout@msn.com 2:00 pm
What idiot wolf-whistled for Windows 10?
Nintendork 13 13 2:01 pm
more car porn
also EA is in 2 hours not 1
RawkHawk2010 2:01 pm
when is ubi
Nintendork 13 13 2:02 pm
in
4 hours
Sony in 7
Conference over.
Nintendork 13 13 2:02 pm
*close Twitch*
RawkHawk2010 2:03 pm
well um
Nintendork 13 13 2:03 pm
Did that live up to your hype and excitement?
Mr. Put-Rare-logos-in-our-logo?
The readers wanna know!
(They also wanna know about if you're a friend or foe)
RawkHawk2010 2:03 pm
I'm still not sure what Sea of Thieves even actually is.
Nintendork 13 13 2:03 pm
It's
uh
Apparently a multiplayer
pirate ship game
breezinabout@msn.com 2:04 pm
Names above heads suggests... MMO? IDK.
Nintendork 13 13 2:04 pm
Where one group of pirates
attack another group of pirates
All controlled by players
and maybe NPCs
Or something.
RawkHawk2010 2:04 pm
Well see
A few days ago I was like
RawkHawk2010 2:05 pm
"What if Rare just took these Kinect Sports Rivals assets they worked so hard on and made an actual adventure game out of them?"
AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE.
breezinabout@msn.com 2:06 pm
Did they even mention the Kinect once in this whole show?
Nintendork 13 13 2:06 pm
Not by name
but they used its features.
(Screenshot-ception)
RawkHawk2010 2:06 pm
http://www.rare.co.uk/
this is still the same
lol
https://twitter.com/RareLtd/status/610501628433682432
Nintendork 13 13 2:06 pm
"10,000 gamerscore"
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Nuts & Bolts Banjo, front and center.
Nintendork 13 13 2:07 pm
Why is this a selling point?
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Hey, Rare's gotta do what they gotta do.
Nintendork 13 13 2:07 pm
That's disgusting.
-_-
RawkHawk2010 2:07 pm
Honestly, my favorite moment from the whole show is when feed of Nuts & Bolts was featured for like...a second.
Nintendork 13 13 2:08 pm
Honestly
I was most impressed by
the
uh
Minecraft Hololens thing.
RawkHawk2010 2:08 pm
Honestly
I'm really excited that, uh, things look optimistic for classic Rare IP.
But uh...
RawkHawk2010 2:09 pm
...I don't think that was the way to usher in a new era.
Is Sea of Thieves the funnest game Mayles has ever worked on?
Nintendork 13 13 2:09 pm
A new era by ushering in old franchises.
RawkHawk2010 2:09 pm
Maybe.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
Sounds like Hillary Clinton's campaign.
(Jeb Bush, too.)
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
But I couldn't have figured that out from that trailer alone.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
(bam, full circle)
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
Not disappointed though.
Nintendork 13 13 2:10 pm
Is there a chance that Nintendo could win E3 for you?
Now that you know what they gotta beat?
RawkHawk2010 2:10 pm
It's just I'm filled with even more suspense after watching than before.
and yes.
Nintendork 13 13 2:11 pm
(Readers: That's a very scary thing, since Rawk was in big suspense for MONTHS leading up to this.)
RawkHawk2010 2:12 pm
https://twitter.com/RareLtd/status/610501628433682432
Every one of those models is reused artwork EXCEPT Zits the Battletoad.
So hmm.
Wait.
Nintendork 13 13 2:14 pm
wot
RawkHawk2010 2:14 pm
LOL
Nintendork 13 13 2:14 pm
?
RawkHawk2010 2:15 pm
Is Rare Replay gonna be rated M because of Conker?!
Nintendork 13 13 2:15 pm
lol
Guess so.
RawkHawk2010 2:15 pm
oh my god
RawkHawk2010 2:18 pm
Well Sea of Thieves is trending.
Nintendork 13 13 2:19 pm
Guess that's... worth something.
Rare is trending.
Cuphead is
The Division is
Xbox E3 is
Guess you can say... Rare stole the conference!
 |
| Phil Spencer... unzipped. #IStandWithPhil |
You better stay tuned for the next E3 conference of the day! KoopaTV will cover it, too!
Bethesda's conference is over this way.
Do you REALLY wanna see EA's conference? Well, it's here.
Want a blast to the past? Check out Microsoft's 2014 conference!
How about the future? Phil Spencer is back in 2016!
We make fun of the "world premiere" here.
Rare Replay looks like it's rated "E-M" at least according to the box art.
ReplyDeleteAnd there we go!
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