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Tuesday, June 1, 2021

KoopaTV's May 2021 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I've really been doing this for eight years, huh?

That's another month down. May 2021. Gone just like that. During that quick month KoopaTV turned eight years old, to little fanfare. Yeah, the least amount of fanfare came from KoopaTV itself, so I'm not lamenting anything.

The integer representing KoopaTV's age has really nothing to do with how our month went, by the way. There was zero impact. ...We're not complacent or anything. We're nimble and stuff. Here, check out our great content:

Top Five Recommended Experiences of May 2021


Since KoopaTV isn't a washed up website, here's the top five (listed in chronological order) experiences that demonstrate our cutting-edge greatness.
  1. The Jury is in about that "Wario" Skit on Saturday Night Live... — KoopaTV went and actually reviewed the Saturday Night Live/Elon Musk Wario skit on a truth and levity basis. Somehow, we're better than their whole paid staff. Hm. If you're looking for washed up, it's SNL, not KoopaTV.
  2. E3 2021 Preview Update: SQUARE ENIX, SEGA, and an Online Portal — E3 2021 starts really soon, and we updated you all in May with some information that corrected the misinformation that other media outlets put out about E3 2021.
  3. Anti-Transparency in United States Taxation... and the Solution! — There is systemic concealment of how money is raised by the United States government, and this article exposes how that impacts your finances.
  4. I can't use my childhood dodgeball strategy in Knockout City — This article discusses the scary privacy issues you should know about Knockout City, the gameplay of the sport portrayed (dodgeball), and how it compares with the traditional sport of dodgeball.
  5. In Memoriam: Glenn Fraldarius — KoopaTV's Memorial Day 2021 article is about a true knight...who died.

Everything on KoopaTV is worth reading, you know. Even if it's not on that list, or if it's not from May 2021. Lots of oldies and goodies and classics are in our archives... many of which still hold up very well to this day.

Best Three Comments and One Worst Comment of May 2021


I really want to talk about the worst comment of the month, because that's what I think of when I think of May 2021 and your comments. ...But let's go through the positives first (in chronological order):
  1. “Well first off, each player is against a cpu player, and if you hit the ball past the paddle, there will be another ball for the human opponents to block. also, you will have an energy meter, and when you miss a ball, you will lose some energy, and you go slower for a short time. if you lose all the energy, you lose.” — spoon 3 hype
  2. “Good review. I really like star allies, but I'd say its somewhat weaker than some of the recent entries. If you don't know, Kirby is one of my favorite franchises and I've played nearly every game. I am a little obsessed. So I suppose I'll give a little review of my own without going too in depth.

    Copy Abilities- great selection and I can't tell you how thrilled I am that clean came back.. As well as the fact that cook and paint got full move sets. I do feel that the new abilities are the weakest here out of the "trilogy" and festival is completely unnecessary. I think Triple deluxe had the best new abilities.

    Gust star- You are 100% correct guest star is brutal! I understand why they can't make new stages for that many characters, but I think it would have been better to include more of the past stages. Or just make the stages randomized past stages, you cannot get stuck regardless of your ability. Every stage has a friend with the specific ability you need to progress wandering about somewhere. I understand the upgrades are optional, but the game does assist you by giving you upgrades anyway at the end section of most levels. I like upgrades, but I think they make the final boss a pushover. I know that's the intention but it shouldn't be that way. I also think the final boss is cool lore wise, but the fight could be better. That entrance was awesome though.

    Chop champ and star slam- I felt these were lackluster, but that's kinda always the case with multiplayer focused games. I actually think things like the arena are better mode of fun than side games like this. I mean I didn't find them very fun. I would rather HAL keep the sub games dedicated to exploring new gameplay methods as they did with the #ds subgames. I think Robobot had the best subgames.

    Collectables- As new games come out it's hard to think of new collectables, but i think they should just stick with this system. Collecting keychains is cool, but we've already seen all the characters before. I get that's the point but I want new stuff. With the puzzles it gives us a chance to see a new piece of art whilst also collecting pieces endlessly without feeling bored. It helps that every piece gets used, unlike keychains where you got a lot of repeat keychains.v Hero in another dimension- I really liked this mode, but I agree a change of scenery would be nice. I actually think modern Kirby could benefit with another superstar like game. As in, one game made up of 9-10 subgames. I really like the corkboard theme so maybe they could remix that too. I think it would be beneficial to have an easy 3 subgames for everyone to play. And then you could actually make the latter subgames challenging and less forgiving like this mode was.

    SECOND PART

    Ultimate Choice- Personally I'm not a fan of difficulty setting, I much prefer all or nothing scenarios. However I understand it gives everyone a chance to try the 'arena' so I'm glad it's there. I beat the 'true arena' difficulty that was added, and yeah its realllllllllly hard. My strategy is to either go with a team of Kawasakis (chef) or a mix of partners that have mass destruction abilities like magalor or the mage sisters. An example being the mage sisters friend circle that we saw in their reveal trailer. Fighting the mage sisters all together in 'true arena' often kills me, the lag is too much! If you still haven't beaten this, then just use stone. It shouldn't take nearly as long as the other games since you have partners, but it's the safest method. This is the hardest arena, but I think it has the best music choice. I would rather listen to upbeat music when fighting then the same arena tune for every battle that triple deluxe had.

    Remix's- I think the Kirby series should actually be the industry standard for remix's. At least for the composition of the remix, I don't really care where remix's play. So many games remix older songs with new instruments (including this game) and that's fine, but the Kirby series often completely reworks the songs into something new. There was a song I remember hearing that I thought was new, but it turned out to be a remix. I don't know the name so off the top of my head think of things like Kabulas theme from super star ultra. Its the same theme reworked in a completely different way. I also like all the little callbacks and motifs to previous tracks. Really stellar soundtrack. Seems like the Kirby series is always willing to try new types of music, the last game had dubstep.

    Back to basics- I think I'll write an article about this, focusing on the Layton and Kirby series, but where does the Kirby series go story wise after this? The whole reason Layton games replaced its main character was because they felt professor Layton went on such big adventures, anything less than that would be unsatisfying. I don't agree with that line of thinking, but I understand it. I think the Kirby series did a great job of remedying this problem with triple deluxe. Sectonia is nowhere near the threat that magalor was, but she was still a force to reckon with. It effectively reset the series back to square one, Kirby didn't have to fight another super being. Of course now with Void Termina we had the 'fate of all dimensions' at stake. How are we gonna top that? But really what will the next games theme be, i suppose they could do something with rocks. They've already done plants, robots, and space. I would like a Kirby rpg.

    So those are my thoughts on star allies, I much prefer writing a comment than a review as I get to skip introducing the game and go right into my thoughts. I don't know how you feel about Kirby, but I could go on and on about it. In any case, I do enjoy reading these older articles.” — Captain Stitch
  3. “I was gonna get the trilogy, but the person who loaned me the first two games said I could keep them so now I own the original trilogy! Well, not the GBA versions, but who does? I'm going to save up and wait until the next sale and get dual destinies, I bought it years ago but my 3ds broke before I could beat it. Also I don't really like the investigations, but you know that. In any case thanks for the heads up!” — Captain Stitch
I happen to like when commenters express their own creativity, so game ideas is a good way to do that. ...So is writing a review of a game in the comments section, which I'm convinced Captain Stitch did because he wants to motivate me to write a review of Paper Mario: The Origami King. Feel free to compare his thoughts on Kirby Star Allies with my full review (which is the article he replied to). Anyway, as an Ace Attorney fan site, we're also of course happy to see people encouraged to buy more of the Ace Attorney series.

And we're not encouraged when we see comments like this:
  1. “i hate you now so muck nerd von tell me your name now or i will ban you much” — ludwing von koopa
There is a real possibility that including this in the newsletter is a COPPA violation, since it's not impossible to fathom that KoopaTV is actually older than this individual.

This isn't just one comment here. This kid wrote dozens and dozens and dozens of comments on that article. Feel free to read all of the comments there if you want your brain to melt (scroll to the top of that article's comments section so you can read them all). On the KoopaTV Loyalty Leaderboard, he's listed as “green kirby with a yoyo” because, among other things, he wanted me to make him a YouTube channel with that name. He got very upset when I told him to make his own YouTube channel, and he devolving into making incoherent death threats. Then he wanted to know MY YouTube channel...which is pretty easy to find. He kept calling me stupid and said he would shoot me “with a gun in real life now stupid cause”, whatever that means. ...Yeah, again, feel free to read all of his comments and try to have them make sense. He posted plenty more than what you see there, but at that point I just started deleting them and not letting the comments onto the website. He eventually stopped when it became obvious his comments would no longer be tolerated, so I think I made the right decision there to starve him out.

Of course, none of it ever had to do with the article topic.

KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program Round 38 Mid-Round Leaderboard


In honour of E3 2021, Round 38 of the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program has juiced up prizing: A $10 Amazon gift card code for first place, and a $10 Nintendo eShop card code for second place. Here are the current standings as of publishing:
  1. Captain Stitch — 69 points
  2. spoon 3 hype — 10 points
  3. Health — 6 points
  4. Lheticus Videre — 6 points
You know, all Captain Stitch does is comment almost every day. If you all did that too, this'd be significantly more competitive. Well, second place is still very wide open!

Corrections Corner; May 2021


We got through the month without any valid on-site corrections being pointed out. Phew.


KoopaTV is actively seeking your feedback and participation in KoopaTV's Feedback Forms and Quizzes. Especially the Feedback Form, though Ludwig finds the Quiz to be pretty amusing so you should do that too. Participating in those is connected with the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program, by the way. KoopaTV will devote a lot of article space to E3 2021 during June. Look forward to that.


As discussed in the April 2021 newsletter, the preceding time period was really weird.
KoopaTV, in the May 2020 newsletter, thought May went by very quickly back then.

6 comments :

  1. I am recovering from my frozen state of not talking much which also extends to not commenting much. Hopefully I will comment much more on this site again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good!
      Remember, you weren't introduced in Kanto, meaning that you don't have to deal with permanent Freeze status!

      Delete
  2. 69 points nice >:] and I swear I will find more corrections to extrapolate and exterminate. Also, I will win once more because my loyalty is everlasting, nothing can taint or tarnish its burning strength.

    But eh, I’m waiting patiently for that origami king review, one of these days. Maybe I should ask your friend LudWING von koopa if he wants to take it on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ...Remember that trying to find corrections of fact are worth more than corrections in spelling...!

      I hope that kid doesn't come back. <.<

      Delete
    2. Points? I don’t do this for personal satisfaction, I do this because it is ones duty. To purge the land of any and every blight, so that it may grow anew into a greater being then it ever was before. Or something like that.

      Rude as the kid was, having a rival of sorts could be fun, but I guess you kinda already have that with your sibling dynamic.

      Delete
    3. Rivals should be of... equal or close enough capabilities.

      That kid is just outmatched. >_>

      Delete

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