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Monday, June 12, 2017

KoopaTV's PC Gaming Show at E3 2017 Live Reactions

By RAWKHAWK2010 - PC Gamers Are Weird

This came out of nowhere (and wasn't planned to be on the schedule) and at least one of the staffers was asleep when it started. Let's get to it then!:

(12:11:05 PM) Rawk:
(12:11:09 PM) Rawk: PC Gaming Show at 1
(12:58:33 PM) Rawk: VORTEX
(12:58:40 PM) Rawk:
(12:58:42 PM) Rawk: we watching this?
(1:00:00 PM) Rawk: where the hell is ludwig
(1:00:30 PM) Rawk: K guess I might be logging this by myself.
(1:00:32 PM) Rawk: OH JOY
(1:00:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Nah, I'm here.

(1:00:46 PM) Rawk: ahhhhhh
(1:00:47 PM) Rawk: yo
(1:00:56 PM) Rawk: Just in time.
(1:01:04 PM) Rawk: "PC Gamers get their hands dirty."
(1:01:16 PM) Rawk: *shows screws being unscrewed from PCs*
(1:01:40 PM) Rawk: This is trying to make PC Gamers seem really sophisticated.

(1:01:56 PM) Rawk: That's in-character, I guess.
(1:02:24 PM) Rawk: "Twitch chat, we're glad you're here."
(1:02:35 PM) Rawk: this is the one time we're not on Twitch.
(1:02:39 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Yeah, i hid that long ago.

(1:02:49 PM) Rawk: Cuz I'm only here because of Rare who linked MI><ER.
(1:02:54 PM) Rawk: Ahhhhhhhhhhh
(1:02:59 PM) Rawk: Because Sea of Thieves is here.
(1:03:28 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Looks like they hired the narrator from Darkest Dungeon. That's pretty cool.

(1:03:29 PM) Rawk: What if this Sea of Thieves demonstration is better than Microsoft's?
(1:04:15 PM) Rawk: i dunno what X-Com is except that someone compared ARMS to it.
(1:04:23 PM) Rawk: But here's an X-Com 2.
(1:04:44 PM) Rawk: and he's got Arbiter's sword from Halo.
(1:04:59 PM) Rawk: more zombies
(1:05:52 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I'm not too into the lore of X-Com, but zombies is probably the last thing I expected.

(1:05:57 PM) Rawk: XCom 2: War of the Chosen
(1:07:44 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( From what I understand, XCom games do tend to get a lot better (and less buggy) when their expansions get released.

(1:07:47 PM) Rawk: I'm eating a biscuit with one hand and screncapping with the other, just like how Miyamoto plays Super Mario Run.
(1:07:50 PM) Rawk: He'd be proud.

(1:08:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol
(1:09:13 PM) Rawk: The Reaper
(1:09:28 PM) Rawk: Wait, so is X-Com anything like ARMS?
(1:09:32 PM) Rawk: It doesn't seem like it.
(1:09:37 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Not at all, lol.

(1:09:40 PM) Rawk: lol
(1:09:45 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( It's a strategy game.

(1:10:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( At least most games in the series are.

(1:10:42 PM) Rawk: I'm so sick of zombies.
(1:11:25 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Zombies are neutral apparently, so they'll also attack the enemy aliens.

(1:11:25 PM) Rawk: I think developers only employ them because they can basically just be stripped down models of the main character.
(1:11:34 PM) Rawk: Bipedal chassi
(1:11:42 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Good point.

(1:11:57 PM) Rawk: But I want monsters.
(1:12:10 PM) Rawk: I'm scared of things on four legs.
(1:12:12 PM) Rawk: Like alien bears.
(1:12:21 PM) Rawk: As we saw last night.
(1:12:24 PM) Rawk: Or...err, this morning.
(1:12:58 PM) Rawk: Sonja OMGitsfirefoxxxx _____
(1:13:10 PM) Rawk: Awful alias
(1:13:17 PM) Rawk: Oh shit
(1:13:23 PM) Rawk: It's that cute game from yesterday.
(1:13:32 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Ooblits(?)
(1:13:33 PM) Rawk: Obolettes or whatever.
(1:13:36 PM) Rawk: Yeah
(1:13:42 PM) Rawk: I like the music.
(1:14:19 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Reminds me of Pikmin/Elebits.

(1:14:23 PM) Rawk: I like everything aside from the actual humans.
(1:14:29 PM) Rawk: "Ooblets"
(1:14:38 PM) Rawk: The humans piss me off.

(1:14:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( MOOD WHIPLASH

(1:15:00 PM) Rawk: Battletech
(1:15:17 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( From cute and innocent to HUGE WAR MECHS.

(1:15:34 PM) Rawk: Aren't you a huge war mech?
(1:15:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Basically.
(1:16:05 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( But that was jarring.

(1:16:05 PM) Rawk: Mech Warrior was one of the first games I ever played.
(1:18:22 PM) Rawk: Imagine if Mario x Rabbids: Kingdom Battle is like this.
(1:19:02 PM) Rawk: Developers love to use the word "juicy."
(1:20:22 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I think the only BattleTech game I've ever played was MechAssault on the original Xbox.

(1:20:37 PM) Rawk: They're gonna regret showing it.
(1:20:42 PM) Rawk: Cuz that looked boring as all hell.
(1:20:52 PM) Rawk: There's Sonja again.
(1:20:57 PM) Rawk: Still dunno her last name.
(1:21:17 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( 'Reed' I think? Something like that.

(1:21:19 PM) Rawk: She has such a long screename that you can't get to it.
(1:21:24 PM) Rawk: ya maybe
(1:21:33 PM) Rawk: wtf
(1:21:35 PM) Rawk: This music.
(1:21:39 PM) Rawk: Is this Grant Kirkhope?!

(1:21:45 PM) Rawk: It sounds just like him.
(1:21:48 PM) Rawk: Doesn't it?!
(1:22:06 PM) Rawk: It sounds like a Donkey Kong 64 boss battle.
(1:22:15 PM) Rawk: Or it did.
(1:23:11 PM) Rawk: Total War Warhammer 2.
(1:23:24 PM) Rawk: Is Warhammer that apocalyptic shit?
(1:23:52 PM) Rawk: Where it makes you feel really really glad you don't live there?
(1:24:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Well there's a lot of apocalyptic stuff in it.

(1:24:38 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That better describes Warhammer 40,000, but this here is Warhammer Fantasy.

(1:24:43 PM) Rawk: Ahhh.
(1:24:51 PM) Rawk: Yeah, that's what I was thinking of.
(1:25:18 PM) Rawk: HEY
(1:25:21 PM) Rawk: IT'S THE TV TROOPAS
(1:25:25 PM) Rawk: THEY'VE GOTTEN SO BIG

(1:25:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I was really looking forward to Total War: Warhammer, but got turned off when they made Chaos (basically the only faction I wanted to play) day-one DLC.

(1:26:06 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Carnosaur vs Dragon. :O

(1:27:10 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Lizardmen vs High Elves demo playable at E3.

(1:28:35 PM) Rawk: This host reminds me of Johnny Ossoff.
(1:28:38 PM) Rawk: ...or someone.

(1:29:11 PM) Rawk: What the hell is with this dude's room?
(1:29:17 PM) Rawk: Did you see that?
(1:29:33 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Erm...
(1:29:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( What was up with it?

(1:30:18 PM) Rawk: He was recessed in some corner with the roof at a 270 degree angle
(1:30:28 PM) Rawk: And it just looked really uncomfortable.
(1:30:39 PM) Rawk: Like he'd bang his head everytime he stands up.

(1:30:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Oh that. Maybe he games in the space under the stairs in his house?

(1:30:52 PM) Rawk: lol
(1:31:02 PM) Rawk: I missed that entire last game.
(1:31:07 PM) Rawk: Wonderland something something
(1:31:36 PM) Rawk: Doug Fisher

(1:31:51 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "Intel's Software Guy"

(1:31:52 PM) Rawk: Fishing for attention.
(1:31:53 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol
(1:32:52 PM) Rawk: He keeps saying "X" and I think he's referencing the Xbox One X.
(1:33:01 PM) Rawk: That's why this was a horrible idea.
(1:33:26 PM) Rawk: I assume the "7X" is something PC-related.
(1:34:24 PM) Rawk: "How many of you have heard of Destiny?!"
(1:34:35 PM) Rawk: Destiny 2 coming to the PC
(1:34:40 PM) Rawk: No one seems very excited.
(1:34:55 PM) Rawk: Doug Fisher had to cue the applause pretty hard.
(1:35:05 PM) Rawk: Fishing for claps.
(1:35:20 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "I've got thousands hours"

(1:35:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I wish I could grow a beard like that.

(1:36:04 PM) Rawk: It's so weirdly solid.
(1:36:09 PM) Rawk: It's like a rock.
(1:36:16 PM) Rawk: Did he hairspray it before coming on?
(1:36:18 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Not that I want a beard like that, I just resent the fact that I can't grow one.

(1:36:33 PM) Rawk: It literally doesn't move.
(1:37:01 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( His beard's much more interesting to look at than listen to what he's saying.

(1:37:06 PM) Rawk: rofl
(1:37:07 PM) Rawk: Very true.
(1:37:17 PM) Rawk: It's like when someone has a mole.
(1:38:15 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( What is this Intel guy even presenting here? A new processor? Graphics card?

(1:38:27 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I can't remember.

(1:38:29 PM) Rawk: No clue.
(1:38:38 PM) Rawk: I don't think he made it clear to begin with.
(1:39:01 PM) Rawk: ............
(1:39:11 PM) Rawk: "the eSports pun intended"
(1:39:21 PM) Rawk: .........Was that really a pun...?
(1:39:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( For a moment I thought he said "...on Nintendo" and I was like, "Wait, what?"

(1:40:24 PM) Rawk: Doug Fisher is one of the worst presenters I've seen this year.
(1:40:28 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( 1 miiiiiilion dollars!!!

(1:40:58 PM) Rawk: He's like JEB!.
(1:41:07 PM) Rawk: He has to beg for enthusiasm.
(1:41:40 PM) Rawk: The VR Challenger League, in Poland.
(1:41:47 PM) Rawk: Who would want to go to Poland?!
(1:42:15 PM) Rawk: I don't wanna go to Eastern Europe period, much less that hole.
(1:43:18 PM) Rawk: Shawn: "We're not even halfway done yet!"
(1:43:24 PM) Rawk: "Coming up!"
(1:43:29 PM) Rawk: ...are they going to commercial break?
(1:43:41 PM) Rawk: What if E3 press conferences really did have commercials?
(1:43:52 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Please, just no.

(1:43:53 PM) Rawk: ...Or are those just the games?
(1:43:55 PM) Rawk: lol.
(1:44:05 PM) Rawk: Back to the PC gamer chicks.

(1:44:25 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That girl has a fox scarf.

(1:44:40 PM) Rawk: they keep looking at eachother out-of-sync.
(1:44:48 PM) Rawk: .....uhhhhh
(1:44:53 PM) Rawk: Is this the second Fox game this E3?

(1:44:58 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Yes.
(1:45:05 PM) Rawk: First was Super Tail aka Not Conker
(1:45:14 PM) Rawk: Maybe we'll get a new Star Fox too.
(1:45:16 PM) Rawk: ...nah.
(1:45:28 PM) Rawk: "Tunic"
(1:45:33 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I like the graphical style on this.

(1:45:45 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Ahh, no sound.

(1:45:49 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol
(1:45:50 PM) Rawk: She tried to give a final comment and there was no...yeah, lol.
(1:46:02 PM) Rawk: This main host makes me feel uncomfortable.
(1:46:23 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( This is the Space Invaders shirt guy, right?

(1:46:25 PM) Rawk: He reminds me of a flamboyant supervillain.
(1:46:32 PM) Rawk: Oh, this other guy, yeah.
(1:46:37 PM) Rawk: I think so.
(1:46:58 PM) Rawk: The camera cut that gamer's head off.
(1:47:01 PM) Rawk: When he stood up.

(1:47:24 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol, the order in which we're likely to recognise him goes: his shirt > his game > his face.

(1:47:24 PM) Rawk: why are these characters so skinny
(1:47:42 PM) Rawk: they look like Mr. Stickman from EA's conference.
(1:48:07 PM) Rawk: That was Battlegrounds again.
(1:48:44 PM) Rawk: Why do Brits respond "Yeahyeah" as a form of approval?
(1:49:04 PM) Rawk: I've heard more than one British developer do that.
(1:50:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I certainly don't do that. Must be a local dialect thing.

(1:50:21 PM) Rawk: Aha.
(1:51:04 PM) Rawk: They're giving away a free badass PC.
(1:51:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "I am pretty cool, right?"

(1:52:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "..."
(1:52:03 PM) Rawk: lol
(1:52:05 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "Please clap"

(1:52:25 PM) Rawk: His coworkers have to hate his ass.
(1:52:33 PM) Rawk: Do we even know his full name?
(1:52:43 PM) Rawk: It's Shawn/Shaun/Sean _____.
(1:52:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) guuuh
(1:52:49 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Plott?
(1:52:51 PM) Rawk: Ludwig.
(1:52:54 PM) Rawk: Get your ass over here.
(1:52:55 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Hi.
(1:53:05 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) oh shit you guys left a lot of messages
(1:53:07 PM) Rawk:
(1:53:25 PM) Rawk: This is only halfway over.
(1:53:42 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "the trailer makes me laugh every time!"

(1:53:53 PM) Rawk: What the hell is this
(1:54:06 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Killing Floor 2 Summer Sideshow event.

(1:54:16 PM) Rawk: It's a zombie carnival.

(1:54:48 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) wot
(1:54:54 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I didn't come here to log >.<
(1:54:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) the hell is this
(1:55:00 PM) Rawk: TOO BAD
(1:55:06 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I was busy being passed out <_<
(1:55:14 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) The hell is this
(1:55:33 PM) Rawk: This main host is extremely hateable.
(1:55:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Is that the guy in the tie?
(1:55:46 PM) Rawk: yes
(1:56:23 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( I didn't see the RoboHusk anywhere in that trailer. That's disappointing. He was my favourite Sideshow Zed from KF1!

(1:56:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) wtf are you people talking about >_<
(1:57:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) How do you hide the chat?
(1:57:19 PM) Rawk: Drag it
(1:57:22 PM) Rawk: To the right.
(1:57:26 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ah hah
(1:57:45 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Wot's social with Sanya?
(1:57:49 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "Indubitably!"
(1:58:00 PM) Rawk: Indubitably is such an asshole word.
(1:58:06 PM) Rawk: maybe the most of all times
(1:58:08 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) It's that Mi><er shit from Microsoft.
(1:58:11 PM) Rawk: yes
(1:58:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ...that's it?
(1:58:14 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Yay videogames!"
(1:58:20 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) the hell is wrong with this guy
(1:58:28 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) This is VGX all over again.
(1:58:33 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Except, like, VG><.
(1:58:35 PM) Rawk: Fortza
(1:58:46 PM) Rawk: He reminds me of a more flamboyant Geoff Keighley.
(1:58:54 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) It's car porn guy.
(1:59:07 PM) Rawk: Down to his weirdly-prominent eyelids.
(1:59:24 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Why are they so proud of car porn?
(1:59:53 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "every fan-requested wheel on the market" using USB support
(1:59:55 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Wii Wheel?
(2:00:07 PM) Rawk: well car porn has been a thing since E3's inception, I assume
(2:00:13 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Whatever you have in your closet, plug it in and get ready to go"
(2:00:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Bit of truck porn there too, to get your kink in.

(2:01:02 PM) Rawk: I wonder what Shaun has in his closet.
(2:01:04 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Sea of Thieves
(2:01:05 PM) Rawk: *ba dum tish*
(2:01:08 PM) Rawk: Oh
(2:01:13 PM) Rawk: So THIS is where Rare talks.
(2:01:18 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( The real reason we're here.

(2:01:20 PM) Rawk: That's kind of pathetic.
(2:01:25 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Ted Timmins, PC Design Lead.
(2:01:52 PM) Rawk: what the fuck
(2:01:58 PM) Rawk: look at Rare guy's face
(2:01:59 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) 21 by 9 favourite resolution?
(2:02:05 PM) Rawk: Is the mic inside his gum?

(2:02:09 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) These guys are scary.
(2:02:29 PM) Rawk: the microphone is inside his cheek
(2:02:32 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Asking about release date.
(2:02:34 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Early 2018.
(2:02:41 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) With a technical alpha on PC.
(2:02:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( No, that's just a bump on his face.

(2:02:52 PM) Rawk: lolololololol
(2:02:53 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Like Pepe?
(2:02:54 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( The mic is on the other side.

(2:03:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ...or wotever that soccer guy was.
(2:03:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) The one with the tumor.
(2:03:12 PM) Rawk: Laughing out loud.
(2:03:28 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Did he just name-drop Mari0 Run?
(2:03:31 PM) Rawk: yes
(2:03:33 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ugh
(2:03:36 PM) Rawk: Is this a Frenchman?
(2:03:55 PM) Rawk: He sounds like a Czech.
(2:04:19 PM) Rawk: Or whatever Shwarztenegger is.
(2:04:28 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I thought he was Austrian.
(2:04:34 PM) Rawk: yeah probs
(2:04:37 PM) Rawk: something over there
(2:04:47 PM) Rawk: Why was Mario Run brought up in relation to this?
(2:04:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Get your hand out of your pocket, guy!

(2:05:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That looks weird.

(2:05:35 PM) Rawk: btw 21:9 resolution is the "cinema resolution" or whatver/
(2:05:42 PM) Rawk: Like this right now
(2:05:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I don't like it.
(2:05:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Actually, my 2nd monitor is
(2:05:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) uh
(2:05:59 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) more of that.
(2:06:10 PM) Rawk: Aspect ratios are becoming flatter and flatter.
(2:06:17 PM) Rawk: Won't be long before it's a line.
(2:06:22 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) 1366 by 768
(2:06:35 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Wot ratio is that?
(2:06:49 PM) Rawk: sounds like 16:9
(2:07:06 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) 1366 isn't divisible by 16.
(2:07:15 PM) Rawk: And?
(2:07:23 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Doesn't it have to be? <.<
(2:07:26 PM) Rawk: no
(2:07:53 PM) Rawk: Day Z
(2:08:04 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) 1366's prime factors are 2 and 683
(2:08:05 PM) Rawk: What if Jay Z starred in Day Z?
(2:08:21 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( this... ISN'T Sea of Thieves?

(2:08:24 PM) Rawk: lol
(2:08:34 PM) Rawk: This is Sea of Thieves after its budget gets reduced.

(2:08:40 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol
(2:08:40 PM) Rawk: which is sure to happen
(2:08:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) More bears.
(2:08:57 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Horse riding.
(2:09:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) death
(2:09:18 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Now we're in the middle ages...

(2:09:21 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Oh hey it IS Sea of Thieves.
(2:09:24 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Human cannons.

(2:09:32 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) And a pirate ship.
(2:09:33 PM) Rawk: Now it's Minecraft.
(2:09:39 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Ylands"
(2:09:46 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( With a Y.

(2:09:50 PM) Rawk: God this host is horrible, lol.
(2:09:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) But pronounced Islands.
(2:09:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( You know.

(2:09:57 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( So it shows up in search engines.

(2:10:04 PM) Rawk: Now we have Ales Um.
(2:10:12 PM) Rawk: Ylands stands for Your Lands.
(2:10:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) It stands for "your lands"
(2:10:20 PM) Rawk: This Land is Y Land
(2:10:23 PM) Rawk: This Land is Your Land
(2:10:35 PM) Rawk: ...dunno what comes next.
(2:11:13 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "o rly?"
(2:11:34 PM) Rawk: Is that a Toad?
(2:11:39 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( lol
(2:11:51 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Was gonna say, he's wearing a mushroom on his head.

(2:12:03 PM) Rawk: There's a Toad and a Mexican.
(2:13:14 PM) Rawk: What if Shawn becomes the new Reggie?
(2:13:49 PM) Rawk: Griffland
(2:14:09 PM) Rawk: For a minute this looked like Sea of Thieves too.
(2:14:17 PM) Rawk: Was that L.O.G.?
(2:14:21 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Everyone's drunk.
(2:14:26 PM) Rawk: Someone had a monitor for a head.
(2:14:51 PM) Rawk: Griftlands*
(2:14:51 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Grift Lands
(2:15:21 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Some guy named Roo.
(2:15:24 PM) Rawk: lol
(2:15:27 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) What is he, a Neopet?
(2:15:34 PM) Rawk: Ru*
(2:15:37 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Ru Weerasuriya"
(2:15:42 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) SURIYA LAW
(2:15:48 PM) Rawk: lawl
(2:16:03 PM) Rawk: WE'RE A SURIYA
(2:16:04 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) You use your ARMS
(2:16:15 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) HE SAID "ISIS"
(2:16:24 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ISIS SPACESTATION
(2:16:38 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That's be a much better title.

(2:16:41 PM) Rawk: Is this a spiritual sequel to Moonbase Alpha?
(2:16:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That'd shift copies.

(2:17:31 PM) Rawk: This beat is the one from We Will We Will Rock You
(2:17:34 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) There was a guy named "Enough Bears"
(2:17:39 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) a character in this game.
(2:17:44 PM) Rawk: More bears?!
(2:17:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Punch Hands Jr"
(2:17:55 PM) Rawk: There were bears earlier in this conference too.
(2:18:01 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( This reminds me of Blitzball, 'cept they're floating instead of swimming.

(2:18:33 PM) Rawk: wtf
(2:18:34 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) lol
(2:18:35 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Intel Software Guy returns.

(2:18:36 PM) Rawk: look at the background
(2:18:39 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) The guy wearing Oculus in the background
(2:18:43 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) looks totally screwed up.

(2:18:44 PM) Rawk: LOL
(2:18:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Now he fell or something.
(2:18:53 PM) Rawk: I heard a crash.
(2:19:13 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Did he drop his headset?

(2:19:25 PM) Rawk: That probably wasn't a good idea, having a VR player so close to the presenters.
(2:19:38 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Keep them quarantined.
(2:19:48 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( OLike Ebola.

(2:19:53 PM) Rawk: Sonja might've got hit upside the head.
(2:20:00 PM) Rawk: Or Fisher.
(2:20:00 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "The future of VR and eSports" "Intel has long been a leader in eSports"
(2:20:17 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I don't know if eSporters want to play in VR.
(2:20:24 PM) Rawk: Poland is the official country of PC Gaming at the moment.
(2:20:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Lawbreakers.

(2:20:55 PM) Rawk: Oh shit
(2:20:58 PM) Rawk: It's Cliffy B.
(2:21:05 PM) Rawk: I thought he left the industry.
(2:21:20 PM) Rawk: He looks seriously old.
(2:21:44 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) dem bullshit marketing betas
(2:21:58 PM) Rawk: He's wearing blue shoes.
(2:22:06 PM) Rawk: Must be an Elvis fan.
(2:22:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( And a Bowser manacle.

(2:22:36 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "29.99, none of that $60 multiplayer-only bullshit"
(2:22:45 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Host awkwardly laughing.
(2:22:54 PM) Rawk: This conference is going to last two hours.
(2:22:59 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) <_<
(2:24:22 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Everyone keeps saying "literally"
(2:24:37 PM) Rawk: This game looks way too fast.
(2:24:42 PM) Rawk: Don't we do that?
(2:24:53 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) ......n-n-n-no.
(2:25:10 PM) Rawk: Well recall that the definition changed.
(2:25:14 PM) Rawk: It means figuratively now.
(2:25:31 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I only use literally to mean something that actually occurred as described.
(2:26:02 PM) Rawk: They keep advertising this "badass PC."
(2:26:12 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) They said "baller PC"
(2:26:20 PM) Rawk: Not in the first half of the conference.
(2:26:22 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Oh hey it's Wargroove.
(2:26:27 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) This is coming out on the Switch, too.
(2:26:42 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) And it's supposed to be a spiritual sequel to Advance Wars.
(2:26:44 PM) Rawk: So is this Advance Wars or what,
(2:26:46 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Yes.
(2:26:47 PM) Rawk: oh
(2:27:02 PM) Rawk: I thought "Mercia" was "Merica"

(2:27:25 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Got dat map builder.
(2:27:52 PM) Rawk: Well the music doesn't suck.
(2:27:54 PM) Rawk: I think.
(2:28:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) the hell
(2:28:15 PM) Rawk: Jay Bayliss.
(2:28:17 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) LOL
(2:28:26 PM) Rawk: Is he related to Kevin Bayliss?
(2:28:34 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "The gameplay reminded me quite a bit of Fire Emblem! ...And Advance Wars"  - host
(2:28:58 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "Brought into the modern age" naming things that Advance Wars Days of Ruin all had.
(2:29:23 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) You can make your own campaign modes.
(2:29:27 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) With branching paths.
(2:29:31 PM) Rawk: That's dumb.
(2:29:42 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Why's that dumb?
(2:29:57 PM) Rawk: "Guess we'll have to make our own!" - Conker
(2:30:16 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) But they clearly have their own campaign mode too.
(2:30:29 PM) Rawk: yea but developers will stop if this becomes mainstream
(2:30:42 PM) Rawk: Sea of Thieves is apparently doing that too.
(2:30:59 PM) Rawk: "Players will be creating the story."
(2:31:26 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Sea of Thieves means that in an "it's open-world so you can do your own progression how you want" way.
(2:31:56 PM) Rawk: still no story
(2:32:01 PM) Rawk: i ain't paying for that
(2:32:07 PM) Rawk: oh no
(2:32:10 PM) Rawk: not more orcs
(2:32:20 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Middle-Earth: Shadow of War

(2:32:20 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Well yeah Sea of Thieves doesn't have a story apparently but Wargroove obviously did from the trailer.
(2:32:25 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Hilarious British accents.

(2:32:32 PM) Rawk: Yo they just talked about chairs.
(2:34:48 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( "Altaria"?
(2:35:56 PM) Rawk: The Pokemon?
(2:36:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( That's what I thought they were saying.

(2:36:24 PM) Rawk: Well I guess humanity has to run out of names at some point.
(2:36:37 PM) Rawk: It's actually scary when you realize that's true.
(2:36:45 PM) Rawk: Maybe we need a hard reboot of language.
(2:36:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Muhammad
(2:37:19 PM) Rawk: LOL

(2:37:42 PM) Rawk: I don't even think the frames of the trailer ended before he appeared.
(2:37:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "one final game from Microsoft" "I'm not allowed to say the name of the game"
(2:37:51 PM) Rawk: It was some weird fade.
(2:37:52 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Adam Isgreen
(2:37:58 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) He's wearing green.
(2:38:24 PM) Rawk: It ain't St. Patrick's Day, bitch!
(2:38:37 PM) Rawk: World Exclusive
(2:38:56 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Stained glass.

(2:39:06 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) "One of history's most beloved PC games"
(2:39:23 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) AGE OF EMPIRES DEFINITIVE EDITION
(2:39:39 PM) Rawk: New Zoom Levels
(2:39:44 PM) Rawk: Exciting Stuff
(2:40:09 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) .......
(2:40:29 PM) Rawk: Well they sure tried to make that seem cool.
(2:40:38 PM) Rawk: No one applauded.
(2:42:17 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Ironed out the jankiness.

(2:42:58 PM) Rawk: This dude is acting like this is the first video-game remake to ever exist.
(2:43:05 PM) Rawk: Not that impressive dude.
(2:44:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( 20th anniversary AoE event in Cologne.

(2:44:16 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( It'll probably get bombed.

(2:44:20 PM) Rawk: lol
(2:44:50 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) " you so much Sonja"
(2:45:39 PM) Rawk: The End.
(2:45:51 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Standing there awkwardly.

(2:46:01 PM) Rawk: Okay well, that was better than EA/
(2:46:13 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Yeah.
(2:46:20 PM) Rawk: The first half > the second half
(2:46:21 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Not a total dud.

(2:46:22 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I dunno
(2:46:23 PM) Rawk: by a lot
(2:46:29 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) not from what I saw.
(2:46:45 PM) Rawk: You'll have to read the log.
(2:46:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( You're not qualified to rate it properly.

(2:46:51 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) k
(2:46:57 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) uhhh
(2:47:00 PM) Rawk: I guess I need to make the article log.
(2:47:02 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) You or Vortex can pub it.
(2:47:03 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) <_<
(2:47:08 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I didn't take any screenshots. :)
(2:47:15 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) I still gotta caption the stuff you put in Bethesda.
(2:47:26 PM) Rawk: I think I took like 200 print screens
(2:47:30 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) o_o;
(2:47:34 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) You were that interested?
(2:47:45 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( ...

(2:47:47 PM) [Koopa Keep]: ( Yeah, you can publish it then.
(2:48:01 PM) Rawk: there were funny things that happened in the first half
(2:48:26 PM) Rawk: I think.
(2:48:44 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) think?
(2:48:47 PM) Rawk: Guess we'll find out when we re-read it!

Hey... there's another conference that's about to happen that KoopaTV was actually scheduled to look at. Stay tuned.

Bethesda was before this.
Behold, Ubisoft is next!
PC Gamers continue to be weird in 2018.

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