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Friday, March 11, 2022

Ring Fit Adventure Fitness Log Week 67: The last filler world

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - And the third-to-last world in general.

Sigh... one last... filler world, really, left in Ring Fit Adventure. That's what I'm bringing you today. We're venturing in the land that's between the physical world and the... afterlife. After last week's Fitness Log had a vore sequence. This is World 67: Fitness Master Lv. 376, which you should think of as a storyless version of World 44: Extra Fitness Lv. 269.

Ring Fit Adventure World 67 Fitness Master Lv. 376 bit of time Four Masters powers fully absorbed by Dragaux
Ring seems pretty happy that Dragaux's digestive system isn't instant, so we can dick around this filler world.
Those three warp portals contain a total of six additional courses and three overworld Treasure Chests.
(Two levels, two Game Gyms, a Battle Gym, and a Fitness Gym.)


The first level we're going to is called Jog-On Bog. Doesn't sound fun. And it wasn't. Foggy, too. They could've named it the Fog Bog. Of a bit more interest is that I've done my 2000th Revolved Crescent Lunge Pose repetition here, so I earned the Crescent Nebula Poser Title. I guess that's all the Revolved Crescent Lunge Poses I'll do for the playthrough now? This gave me access to General Store Number 61 (and the world's Town... but there are zero NPC inhabitants). The only clothing that I haven't bought yet is the Game Machine III, but I need three Zircon for that and I only have one. I also have access to the first warp point and the two Game Gyms: Squattery Wheel (Advanced) for a Defense Drink and Robo-Wrecker (Advanced) for a Strength Drink. ...I got A ranks on both on my first try, though Squattery Wheel's was pretty iffy at 84 points. The overworld Treasure Chest here had one Dragon Fruit. Pft.

Backing out of the warp zone and to the main part of the world again is the next level, Ribcage Peak. It's like the first (or second?) level or so of the game... except it's in the fog. You can tell how little effort they put into porting levels from earlier in the game because the game still gives you contextual prompts to jump over small heights that every other level takes for granted you know how to do that. As they should, since it's World 67.

Ring Fit Adventure Low Ring Press jump help controls Ribcage Peak World 67 Fitness Master
I don't need the game to tell me how to jump in the third-to-last world of the third playthrough!


Now I have a lot of options. Warp zone? North path guarded by Rare Hoplin (with a course behind it)? South path guarded by Gold Hoplin (with another Game Gym behind it)? ...Well I headed south to the Gold Hoplin in search of riches. There were four of them. I raided the Battle Gym they were guarding. But inside of that were five waves of monsters! Why does that need a guard? If anything, the five monster waves should be guarding the Gold Hoplins and the currency they drop. Based on the amount of time I've taken today, I should keep going... but I feel slightly light-headed with a headache and the great need to shower, so I'm gonna stop. (If you were wondering how I did in the Gym, I finished it in 9 turns with a 98% Great! ratio.)

On Monday I feel... a lot better! The first thing I did was take the north path versus the five Rare Hoplins. Behind them was the Whirling Halls. It's... foggy. You get to do “fun” activities like ride Squat swings into fog with no idea what lies ahead. Sure, it's okay from a gameplay perspective because Ring Fit Adventure is on-rails, but my character within the game doesn't think life is on-rails and it'll all be alright. Anyway, there was also a Treasure Chaser with 150 coins inside.

Ring Fit Adventure Whirling Halls squat swing in the fog
...I don't trust this situation!


Next course is Soaring Valley. I... have nothing to say about it. Lots of soaring. In a valley. Meh. Finally, to end the day, I went to the second warp zone with the Battle Gym and the Fitness Gym, and entered the Battle Gym. For a Pink-Grapefruit Smoothie. Five waves of monsters. I finished it in 12 turns with a 99% Great! ratio. ...Not much else to say about the filler day of the filler world.

I next picked this up on... Thursday. And... I'm not going to od the Fitness Gym first because I don't feel properly stretched. Instead, I went to the third warp zone and went to the northern of the two courses, Rear Byway. The combination of monster fights there, as well as the brief rowing section and substantial numbers of consecutive rail sections (including a Robbins chase on a Back Press rail at the end) got me feeling a lot warmer. Time to tackle this Fitness Gym's lengthy and arduous CORE SET for the irrelevant reward of five Cherries:
  1. Bow Pull (x40)—This was part of my routine at Rear Byway, because both enemy groups had monsters spaced out where you had to use a five-range Fit Skill to hit them all, and they were overwhelmingly Garnet-coloured. So Bow Pull is perfect for that. My preparation paid off and I did very well here.
  2. Overhead Lunge Twist (x40)—Get into a lunge pose and hold the Ring-Con above your head... and then rotate your upper body perpendicularly 20 times to each side and back. Keep your lower body unmoved. Pretty simple and hard to flop!
  3. Pendulum Bend (x30)—It... actually feels pretty nostalgic to do some last Pendulum Bends before the game is over. Haven't done them in what feels like forever. (...A month and a half ago, actually. Huh.)
  4. Seated Ring Raise (x60)—Seated Ring Raise is practically a freebie.
  5. Plank (x30)—...Plank... is... NOT... a freebie. Plank is by far the biggest challenge of the Core Set. In fact, Plank warrants being labelled “problematic.” You need to have your butt up far higher than a real recommended Plank. And you're doing 30 quick things instead of a few long Planks. It can't be good for you. It's bad form and Ring Fit Adventure is better than that. You're basically doing push-ups from your elbows. It's best to make sure you're flat on the ground when the game is checking your posture before the reps start.
  6. Warrior III Pose (x28)—After Planks? This is whatever.

This took about 13 minutes of in-game time, and... far more than that in real-time. But I managed to S rank the Core Set! Yay. I got the Cherries, and access to the overworld Treasure Chest containing the third and last Zircon I'll ever need. I bought out the Game Machine III shorts from the General Store, and I'm 99% complete with every clothing Catalog. One outfit left for each... which I won't get until a story event, I'm sure. Then I wasted 50,000 gold on 10 Strength Drinks, which is an extremely bad value but I also don't really have anything else to spend money on. I won't be buying a corresponding number of Defense Drinks, because more Defense is useless but more Attack should marginally help. Anyway, last course: Inner Byway, back at where I did Rear Byway. ...It's a much quicker level and I have nothing to say other than that the last overworld Treasure Chest has 500 coins. That's it for this... horrible, atrocious MAR10 Day.

It's Friday. Boss fight day! The last course is called Entrance to Hades. Aesthetically, it looks like a Dragaux Stadium. But unlike Dragaux Stadium... there are pre-boss monster fights! (Also it's kind of a straight run through the course.) The first with one Mini Dragaux Statue. The second was with a Berserk Robocycle, a Mini Dragaux Statue, and a Berserk Robot—and you need a five-range Fit Skill to hit all on the same turn. Mini Dragaux Statues can be 3RKO'd and will always drop a Dragaux Statue Fragment.

Ring Fit Adventure Mini Dragaux Statue entrance to Hades big background
I thought this screenshot was pretty cool.
With the Mini Dragaux Statue in the foreground and the huge Dragaux Statues in the background.


As for the boss fight? Coming to us with miniboss music, it's Dragaux Statue! With two Dark Matta Ray+s and two Dark Megaphauna+s. Dragaux Statue will do generic Dragaux punches... BUT ALSO SOMETIMES SHOOTS LASER EYE-BEAMS THAT ARE REALLY AWESOME. Uh... and the fight went very quickly. A couple of Boat Poses to defeat the minions, and then whatever one-range Fit Skills I want like Chair Pose and Seated Ring Raise until the Dragaux Statue disintegrated. Rather than dropping a shiny stone, it dropped a Dragaux Statue Core. It's pretty much like one of the several Drgaaux Statue fights we did in World 59.

There was no dialogue before, during, or after the boss fight. You might not expect a statue to talk, but it DID talk in World 44... so... I dunno.


Ring Fit Adventure Week World 67: Fitness Master Lv. 376 Exercise Log
I think this'll be the last world where I'll get to only do it in four days...



The remaining two worlds in Ring Fit Adventure are... very long and packed with lots of courses that take time to go through. Please support Ludwig in the comments section.


World 68 is here, and it did take more than four days. At least a lot happened around its boss fight.

2 comments :

  1. No vore, no talking statues, no M√ľnchausen, what has the world come to??!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. WORLD 68 WILL BE BETTER.

      .......
      Well so far that's not confirmed. >.>;

      Delete

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