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Thursday, September 30, 2021

Koopa Kingdom to boycott Beijing 2022 Olympic Games (with no videogame version)

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - We haven't heard anything about this and it starts in four months.

Contrary to a Wikipedia vandal that's been allowed to have their erroneous edits on Wikipedia for the whole month of September (until I reverted it), there is no “Olympic Winter Games Beijing 2022 - The Official Video Game.” SEGA has announced no such title. The official Olympic Video Games website still has the Tokyo 2020 videogames. There's no evidence there will be any videogame support for the Beijing 2022 Olympic Games that begins on February 4, 2022.

...That's super soon. I mean, if there would be a videogame, it would've been announced by now. Surely at the Tokyo Game Show, even. But no such announcement took place.

But even if, say, Koopa Kingdom and the Mushroom Kingdom and... Mobius, I guess, were invited to the Olympic Games, I can say that at least Koopa Kingdom wouldn't come. (Which means no “Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games Beijing 2022” or “Mario & Sonic at the Beijing 2022 Olympic Games”...) Number one, we just had them in Japan a couple of months ago and we're exhausted. Also, we didn't win a single medal.

Boycott Beijing 2022 Olympic Winter Games
Behold, one of the laziest excuses for an image on a KoopaTV article in my memory.

Number two, and more importantly, China is an absolutely garbage location to host the Olympic Games. Now, the Chinese Communist Party and the sad sacks at the Olympic International Committee absolutely deserve one another, with Thomas Bach stating that the IOC won't be “political” and therefore has no problem hosting the Olympics in China. We don't want any part in that. #NoBeijing2022

And number three, if we did enter China, and myself in particular, we'd likely be arrested. If you haven't been on KoopaTV for the past couple of years, writing articles bashing and calling for the overthrow of the Chinese Communist Party has been a favourite pastime of mine. And they totally deserve it, between their genocide of Uyghurs, worldwide pandemic spreading (it's not called the CCP Virus for nothing), and suppression of freedom of their citizens (even if they claim to enjoy it) and others, including Hong Kong and Taiwan. The problem is that I've written extensively about all of those things, to the point where KoopaTV has been banned from within China.

The official motto for the Olympic Winter Games Beijing 2022 is “Together for a Shared Future”, but I believe we can all agree that no one wants to share a future of “world unity” with the Chinese Communist Party.

With all of that said, it's not a bad idea to get back into the fitness mood, so starting next week I'll return to playing Ring Fit Adventure and documenting my progress on KoopaTV. Fitness Fridays will be back! Perhaps you'll recall I completed Extra Fitness mode at the start of July 2021. It's been a long enough break. Extra Fitness was actually the second playthrough of Ring Fit Adventure; the third and final mode is called Fitness Master. I'll tell you about it next week, then!

Ludwig is able to write the TRUTH about China only because he's not physically going there, since he's writing from the comfort of a Koopa Kingdom castle. Obviously going to China would be a terrible idea for a noted China critic. That's still no excuse for Ludwig to abandon his fitness goals, however. Feel free to comment if you think it's silly to have yet another Olympics so soon after the previous one. This boycott will also mean that KoopaTV will not live react or commentate about the Opening Ceremony, the Closing Ceremony, or any event.

Now it's time for you to learn about Fitness Master!
The United States will also boycott the Beijing 2022 Olympic Games. ...The government. Not the athletes. They're not boycotting.
Although they should consider it, because they might get Chinese bureaucrats sticking things in places they don't want attention.


  1. Went game shopping today and saw Mario v sonic 2020z thought of this post.

    If your curious I bought NEO the world ends with you, Katamary Damacy redeployed, and a Jake Dark. Did you know the jale dark series is over 30 years old??

    Ex elect a mini-review of TWEWY NEO. I know your not into the game, but I can’t help sharing my thoughts anyway.

    1. Okay I swear all those typos weren’t there when I wrote this. It is 11:00 by me so I guess I am getting a bit sleep deprived. Gotta wake by 5:00. As my mother always said, “The early Gordo kills the Kirby!”

    2. ...Yeah I dunno wot the hell you're trying to write.


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