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Saturday, July 24, 2021

KoopaTV's Live Reactions to Tokyo 2021's Olympic Opening Ceremony

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Watching from the safety of quarantined rooms.

As I wrote earlier in the week, Team Koopa is currently in a quarantined room at the Olympic Village submitting negative COVID-19 tests. The five of us (myself, Wendy O. Koopa, Larry Koopa, Bowser Jr., and King Bowser Koopa) don't have much to do, but we wanted to connect with the KoopaTV staffers not in Tokyo, Japan, so I reached out to the staff and got... just Kamek. Well, he's pretty knowledgeable and with a good eye (enhanced by glasses) for what to watch in big productions. So we're live-reacting to the Tokyo 2021 Olympic Games Opening Ceremony. I can't be there due to the quarantine, but I can at least watch my to-be competition.

We have previous experience live-reacting to Olympic Opening Ceremonies, including Rio 2016's and PyeongChang 2018's. We're watching via the United States stream ran by the awful NBC, who will never be able to put on a decent show. Note that the timestamps reflect Tokyo time, but of NBC's “prime time” 19:30 Friday slot. That means the Opening Ceremony had already happened in real-time in Japan way earlier in the day, but NBC wanted to put it on at night for Americans. ...And heavily edited.

[8:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "The Games of the XXXII Olympiad open in Tokyo with coverage of the lighting of the cauldron and the parade of nations from National Stadium. "
[8:29 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: In real-time, the Opening Olympics already happened. ...But we're watching it for the first time now. Including the KoopaTV staffers literally present in Tokyo. It's... complicated how that works. Blame quarantines.
[8:33 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Nothing is actually happening yet.
[8:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Even though I'm in Japan we're still watching FAKE NEWS NBC's coverage, so it's America-centric.
[8:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're acting like the Olympic athletes are going to a war and are very strained away from their families and wotever.
[8:36 AM] Kamek: Woot!
[8:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Reminder you won't see any Koopas on camera.
[8:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Just icky humans that are trying to stop Team Koopa from winning.
[8:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I dunno if you'll find hedgehogs though.
[8:37 AM] Kamek: Very human centric
[8:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The NBC commentators are saying that the Opening Ceremonies are toned to the pandemic moment, whatever that means.
[8:39 AM] Kamek: Being toned down and what not
[8:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They gotta nerf Japan.
[8:40 AM] Kamek: Ah. They're going over the quarantine
[8:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They say only 20% of the Japanese are vaccinated. Glad they've updated it from the 2% number it was at for weeks.
[8:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah, I wrote about these awful regulations.
[8:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's torture.
[8:41 AM] Kamek: 2 Americans tested positive!
[8:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "When the athletes of the world at long last march into the Olympic Stadium" unless you came in late enough you're not allowed, like us.
[8:41 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Big deal, two freaking Americans.
[8:42 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uggh ads.
[8:42 AM] Kamek: First ad
[8:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Apparently humans have a huge problem paying with cash nowadays.
[8:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: How dumb are Americans getting?
[8:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: 'cause they've figured out how to use cash for generations and generations lasting hundreds of years. Until now, apparently. According to the ad.
[8:44 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (They gotta use a mobile smartphone that's "contactless")
[8:44 AM] Kamek: shrug
[8:45 AM] Kamek: Highlight shows are available
[8:45 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With Snoop Dogg on "Peacock".
[8:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uhhhh not everyone here has their mask on.
[8:46 AM] Kamek: Basketball and baseball players are the flag bearers for America that's neat
[8:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: According to the Athletes Playbook, they should be disqualified or fined.
[8:47 AM] Kamek: Baseball player's family isn't wearing masks >>
[8:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They brought their fake news election "numbers" guy to the Olympics.
[8:48 AM] Kamek: Oh dear they have a STATS nerd
[8:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "A majority of athletes for Team USA are women. 54%!"
[8:48 AM] Kamek: This seems like a lot of pandering
[8:49 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm glad even you noticed that!
[8:49 AM] Kamek: He said California is the biggest state
[8:49 AM] Kamek: ...
[8:49 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...The one with the most athletes in Team USA.
[8:50 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: These stats are useless.
[8:50 AM] Kamek: Are you allowed to compete at 12 years old!
[8:50 AM] Kamek: ?
[8:50 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I dunno.
[8:51 AM] Kamek: I wanna know more about small Syrian child who plays ping pong
[8:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: TABLE TENNIS.
[8:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not ping pong!
[8:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hend_Zaza
[8:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: She was 11 when she qualified.
[8:53 AM] Kamek: Sheesh
[8:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: She managed to do this during the Syrian civil war.
[8:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Entirely possible that their other possible players just got killed off through that.
[8:54 AM] Kamek: Eek!
[8:54 AM] Kamek: Gymnastics is America's game?
[8:56 AM] Kamek: Both of those girls are from Minnesota
[8:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: 'kay the ceremony should be starting soon...
[8:57 AM] Kamek: Sudan lady didn't have mask
[8:58 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Will I be a jerk if I screenshot all the mask-less people when I myself don't want to wear a mask?
[8:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That'd make me little different than a "Karen"!
[9:00 AM] Kamek: BEGIN
[9:00 AM] Kamek: maybe you should for posterity
[9:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I feel like I told you it'd begin now and not half an hour prior.
[9:00 AM] Kamek: Rank them  by country?
[9:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uh... Rank their... masklessness?
[9:01 AM] Kamek: Yes?
[9:01 AM] Kamek: Also this is a very abstract
[9:01 AM] Kamek: Oh
[9:01 AM] Kamek: I get it now
[9:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't.
[9:03 AM] Kamek: Spooky
[9:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "hello 2020" Yeah, not really.
[9:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Transition to deserted hellscape.
[9:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: People exercising indoors. Don't see Ring Fit Adventure.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony exercising indoors inside montage
Hopefully you haven't missed the 46 weeks of Ludwig playing Ring Fit Adventure on KoopaTV.
...But if you have, you can remedy that. Start here and keep going.


[9:05 AM] Kamek: Good point
[9:05 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're doing a countdown despite them already saying BEGIN.
[9:06 AM] Kamek: Are they explaining the symbolism?!
[9:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yes, NBC commentators need to explain what's going on.
[9:06 AM] Kamek: But it's so. Simple
[9:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: As they got many people in corners of the stage doing indoor exercises with streams of energy/light connecting them all.
[9:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're all socially distanced.
[9:07 AM] Kamek: Good
[9:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, the social distance is part of the symbolism, too!
[9:07 AM] Kamek: I'm half expecting studio ghibli movie music
[9:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now we got simulated light cherry blossoms.
[9:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Because it's Japan so of course...
[9:07 AM] Kamek: Yoooo boxer
[9:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...that's a woman?
[9:07 AM] Kamek: ...
[9:08 AM] Kamek: That was cool
[9:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The is-a-woman boxer got off the treadmill.
[9:09 AM] Kamek: Look it's the virtual boy game Red Alarm

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony red strings
I'm really pleased that Kamek put in that reference.


[9:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol
[9:10 AM] Kamek: The real red ropes interact with the floor?
[9:10 AM] Kamek: Projections ?
[9:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I thought it was all light effects.
[9:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And not a real red rope.
[9:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's some Oriental concept here with that red rope that I'm forgetting the name of.
[9:10 AM] Kamek: The outfits look like raggedy anne
[9:10 AM] Kamek: The hair anyway
[9:11 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The NBC commentators saying "the beating heart of the Olympics are the athletes."
[9:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Is the boxer gonna start singing?
[9:12 AM] Kamek: It feels like they're going to
[9:12 AM] Kamek: The blood people are continuing too
[9:12 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Nah, some stretches and back to the treadmill.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Arisa Tsubata boxer treadmill red thread string
I like that these are BLOOD PEOPLE.


[9:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WAIT ARE THEY REALLY CUTTING TO AN AD BREAK?
[9:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: For vizzy lemonade.
[9:13 AM] Kamek: Peacock ad here
[9:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The treadmill-running boxer's name is Arisa Tsubata.
[9:14 AM] Kamek: Ad for paralympics?
[9:16 AM] Kamek: The emperor!
[9:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Welcome back to Tokyo and while we were away" the Emperor came in.
[9:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And that jerk Tomas Bach and Dr. Jill Biden.
[9:17 AM] Kamek: That camera guy was almost not social distancing
[9:17 AM] Kamek: Oh. The ball is. Mt. Fuji
[9:18 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The NBC people are acting like it's profound commentary that the sun rises in Japan.
[9:18 AM] Kamek: The English speaking Japanese lady has a cool accent
[9:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I agree. Now we can listen to Japan's national anthem.
[9:19 AM] Kamek: Ooo it's fluffy

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Misia Japan national anthem
Look at the fluff...


[9:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It should be better than America's.
[9:19 AM] Kamek: Japanese guy is shifty eyes
[9:20 AM] Kamek: Do you think they're using a fan for the flag ceremony
[9:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break again...
[9:21 AM] Kamek: This is getting silly
[9:21 AM] Kamek: Is there a better place to stream this?
[9:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not from America.
[9:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC has paid hundreds of millions for a monopoly.
[9:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Possibly more.
[9:22 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah it's billions.
[9:22 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wikipedia says: "NBC has held the American broadcasting rights to the Summer Olympic Games since the 1988 games and the rights to the Winter Olympic Games since the 2002 games. In 2011, NBC agreed to a $4.38 billion contract with the International Olympic Committee to broadcast the Olympics through the 2020 games, the most expensive television rights deal in Olympic history.[1] NBC then agreed to a $7.75 billion contract extension on May 7, 2014, to air the Olympics through the 2032 games.[2] NBC also acquired the American television rights to the Youth Olympic Games, beginning in 2014,[3] and the Paralympic Games for the 2014 and 2016 editions.[4] NBC is one of the major sources of revenue for the IOC.[5]"
[9:23 AM] Kamek: Sheesh
[9:24 AM] Kamek: Disembodied voice talking about death
[9:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The speaker may also possibly be dead.
[9:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The NBC commentator has to explain recognising dead people.
[9:25 AM] Kamek: And ruining the moment of silence
[9:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They got a Froslass woman out there.
[9:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Barefoot.
[9:26 AM] Kamek: She has no eyebrows
[9:26 AM] Kamek: Internet has ruined feet
[9:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, now she's dead, I guess.
[9:26 AM] Kamek: Silence again?
[9:27 AM] Kamek: MOKTOO
[9:27 AM] Kamek: ?
[9:27 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Probably Japanese for "SILENT!"
[9:27 AM] Kamek: Oooooo
[9:27 AM] Kamek: Culture
[9:27 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now there's singing from the participants.
[9:28 AM] Kamek: Look they're being that one Pokémon
[9:28 AM] Kamek: With the wood
[9:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uh...
[9:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You're gonna have to be more specific than that.
[9:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Timburr?
[9:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Komala?
[9:28 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Gurdurr?
[9:28 AM] Kamek: I'm digging their outfits

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony ancient Japanese carpentry wood
Kamek never confirmed which Pokémon he had in mind.


[9:29 AM] Kamek: Wheelchair people?
[9:29 AM] Kamek: Are the paralympics here too?
[9:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yes, wheelchairs played a big role in ancient Japanese carpentry after the many accidents that occur.
[9:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Paralympics are in a different month.
[9:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Also in Japan but not at the same time.
[9:30 AM] Kamek: Special shoes
[9:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Not barefoot)
[9:31 AM] Kamek: Take that internet!
[9:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Probably because he's tap-dancing)
[9:32 AM] Kamek: New guy has animé hair
[9:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...is this about to transition to a commercial?
[9:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...No.
[9:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright they got people lookin' like they're right out of The World Ends With You dancing to the stage.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Japanese style fashion hipsters
Do I have to at least try the Neo: The World Ends with You demo?
(Full game releasing in mere days.)


[9:33 AM] Kamek: Is tap dancing à celebrated Japanese past time?
[9:34 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...I dunno.
[9:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The people who are actually working and not dancing (wheelchair guy is dancing, which means spinning around in circles) are slowly getting the five Olympic circles to the stage. They're at three.
[9:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...OH, BEHIND THE THREE ARE TWO MORE.
[9:35 AM] Kamek: That was cool
[9:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THEY GOT ALL FIVE.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony five rings symbol creative wood carving working
THEY REALLY DID IT.


[9:35 AM] Kamek: Creative wood working
[9:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: COMBO
[9:35 AM] Kamek: Which I know is a Japanese past time
[9:36 AM] Kamek: It took an hour but we're almost to the parade of nations
[9:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Parade of Nations coming up.
[9:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break ending.
[9:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But first NBC wants you to know that Xfinity is showing the Olympics in 4K, unlike the Nintendo Switch.
[9:39 AM] Kamek: Lol
[9:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: COMMERCIAL BREAK RESUME
[9:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Got screenshot of the Argentina flag-bearer not properly wearing a mask.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Argentina flag bearer wear mask incorrectly
See that guy's nose? You shouldn't.
We wrote very detailed information on how to wear a mask correctly over here.


[9:44 AM] Kamek: Creativity flag segment
[9:44 AM] Kamek: ?
[9:44 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh I thought this was a commercial.
[9:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: AHHH
[9:46 AM] Kamek: Yay it's Greece!
[9:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Familiar blue and white flag of Greece"
[9:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: HOW ABOUT THE FAMILIAR DRAGON QUEST THEME?
[9:46 AM] Kamek: Awww only two people per flag
[9:47 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Known as the Lord of the Rings" ???
NO DRAGON QUEST
[9:47 AM] Kamek: Victory theme
[9:47 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Refugee Olympic Team has tripled from five years ago, because I guess the world has gotten worse.
[9:47 AM] Kamek: Eek!
[9:48 AM] Kamek: The Irish
[9:48 AM] Kamek: Are cool
[9:48 AM] Kamek: With their. Bowing
[9:49 AM] Kamek: Pretty outfits for Afganistan
[9:50 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not the guys with the suit and ties.
[9:50 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "At least with some journalists and dignitaries there are people for the athletes to wave to." Who the heck would want to wave pleasantly to JOURNALISTS?
[9:50 AM] Kamek: Mohammed flissi
[9:51 AM] Kamek: Boxer
[9:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC guy talking about how great it is that gender equality is being promoted.
[9:51 AM] Kamek: That's a lot of Argentina
[9:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: A guy took his mask off to kiss to the crowd.
[9:51 AM] Kamek: Yeah...
[9:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: As Argentina is just jumping around.
[9:52 AM] Kamek: Dude look at those suits for Aruba!
[9:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC doesn't want you to look at Aruba.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Aruba Parade of Nations outfits Allyson Ponson Mikel Schreuders
Viewers only saw Aruba very briefly, so it's a good thing I took a screenshot.


[9:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: As they cut to Team USA on a bus.
[9:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And then to a commercial break.
[9:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Anyway, here's a list of the music that's playing: https://twitter.com/aitaikimochi/status/1418545839828475908/photo/1
[9:53 AM] Kamek: Sigh
[9:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So there's definitely ones I'm very much looking forward to.
[9:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Assuming Fake News NBC doesn't just skip them.
[9:54 AM] Kamek: I can't stay all night
[9:54 AM] Kamek: I have until 9:30
[9:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well this'd go a lot faster if NBC wasn't terrible.
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Monster Hunter music playing.
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uh...
[9:55 AM] Kamek: Angola has a nice outfit
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC IS JUST CUTTING IT
[9:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC IS GOING BACK AND FORTH AND YOU CAN TELL FROM HOW THE MUSIC IS CHOPPED
[9:56 AM] Kamek: Israel coming
[9:56 AM] Kamek: With baseball!
[9:57 AM] Kamek: Spiderman popsocket guy

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Parade of Nations Israel Spider-man PopSocket
Flashback to when Kamek livestreamed Spider-man for PlayStation 4.


[9:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Italy won't disappoint." - NBC commentator, because apparently Israel did
[9:58 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Iraqu is up.
[9:58 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Woman just isn't bothering with the mask.
[9:58 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Head coverings? Mandatory.
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Face coverings? No.
[9:59 AM] Kamek: Irán likes popsockets too
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "And India!"
[9:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ORRR
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They should say, "AND FROG'S THEME FROM CHRONO TRIGGER!"
[10:00 AM] Kamek: Field hockey
[10:00 AM] Kamek: And boxing
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I wish I could screenshot the best music but you can't screenshot music.
[10:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Minor limitation of our format. <.<
[10:00 AM] Kamek: True...
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Though NBC would send us a copyright takedown request if we did get it, probably.
[10:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And for the audience, these are obviously arrangements of the themes and not just their SNES MIDIs or something.
[10:01 AM] Kamek: Why is Ukraine having so many people
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Japan is safer than their actual country.
[10:02 AM] Kamek: Uzbekistan has a cool flag
[10:02 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: A Ukrainian fencer named Olga has her own Barbie doll. Fortunately, I won't have to fight her, because they segregate by gender.
[10:03 AM] Kamek: Lucky you!
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This woman Uzbekistan gymnast they're showing looks like a man in the images they're showing.
[10:03 AM] Kamek: Uruguay is freaking out
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Like, she looks like an outright tranny.
[10:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Fighting over the flag"
[10:04 AM] Kamek: There's great Britain
[10:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Great Britain with 391 athletes.
[10:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Koopa Kingdom has 5.)
[10:05 AM] Kamek: Virgin Islands?
[10:05 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The BRITISH Virgin Islands at that.
[10:05 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not to be confused with the United States Virgin Islands.
[10:06 AM] Kamek: Yeesh
[10:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The other Virgin Islands are just Puerto Rico.
[10:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which, while part of the United States, aren't the United States Virgin Islands.
[10:08 AM] Kamek: Egypt is subdued...
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "While we were away" they had Ecuador, Egypt, Estonia, and Eswatini (used to be Swaziland).
[10:09 AM] Kamek: Swaziland... I remember that name
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Same.
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm unfamiliar with Eswatini.
[10:09 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think this is Monster Hunter music.
[10:10 AM] Kamek: Eritrea?
[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
[10:10 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ROBO'S THEME
[10:10 AM] Kamek: El Salvador has awesome jackets
[10:11 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (The music is going to be downhill from here)
[10:11 AM] Kamek: That was quick
[10:12 AM] Kamek: What song is Oman?
[10:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: From Sonic the Hedgehog.
[10:13 AM] Kamek: Ah
[10:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Netherlands look like they're from Team Flare.
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Admins specifically)

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Parade of Nations Netherlands Pokémon X Y Team Flare Admins outfits
The Netherlands delegation are cosplaying as Team Flare Admins.


[10:14 AM] Kamek: I like that they analyze Ghana by state size
[10:14 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ghana not doing well on mask-wearing.
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC is doing Cape Verde dirty.
[10:15 AM] Kamek: Guyana has cool racing looking outfit
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And Guyana.
[10:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With an interview with Megan Rapinoe, a soccer player.
[10:15 AM] Kamek: He's trying to talk about cape verde like side effects in a medicine commercial
[10:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (She doesn't just look like a lesbian; she is one)
[10:17 AM] Kamek: Canada
[10:17 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're still disrespecting many of the nations, now including Qatar.
[10:17 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Finally ending the Team USA interview with Canada.
[10:18 AM] Kamek: Going for the syncing claps
[10:18 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Gabon appearing.
[10:18 AM] Kamek: NOPE
[10:18 AM] Kamek: AD
[10:18 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Cutting off Cameroon with a commercial break.
[10:18 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm worried we won't see Sierra Leone.
[10:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They'd rather advertise Oreos.
[10:19 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Which  sounds ironic, I dunno.)
[10:22 AM] Kamek: Cameroon had an AWESOME outfit
[10:22 AM] Kamek: North Macedonia has a great flag
[10:23 AM] Kamek: Ah no wonder we came back. We have to spy on Cuba
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "While we were away..." NBC skipped Cameroon, Gambia, Cambodia, North Macedonia (name changed from Macedonia), Guinea, and Guinea-Bissau.
[10:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol
[10:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC predictably mentioning the chaos in Cuba.
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Kyrgyzstan didn't even bring masks.
[10:25 AM] Kamek: Kiribati?
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Nevermind one guy just pulled out a mask.
[10:25 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Too late!)
[10:26 AM] Kamek: Guam has cool tops
[10:26 AM] Kamek: Explaining how they have less rights
[10:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Huh, I thought Guam would be part of the American team.
[10:26 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Guam also doesn't have to pay federal income tax.
[10:27 AM] Kamek: Cook Islands is neat
[10:28 AM] Kamek: Flag sharing "it's neat"
[10:28 AM] Kamek: No it's not...
[10:29 AM] Kamek: When did the word newbie become common
[10:29 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa:
In the 1960s and 1970s, the term "newbie" had a limited usage among U.S. troops in the Vietnam War as a slang term for a new man in a unit.[5]
[10:30 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: According to Wikipedia.
[10:30 AM] Kamek: Wait
[10:30 AM] Kamek: Why is there Congo
[10:30 AM] Kamek: And the democratic Republic of congo
[10:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Similar reason why there's a China and a People's Republic of China.
[10:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Read up on the First Congo War and the Second Congo War.
[10:33 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That's the conflict that conflict minerals fund.
[10:35 AM] Kamek: Columbia had a killer outfit too
[10:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WAIT THEY LOOPED THE VIDEOGAME MUSIC
[10:35 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WE'RE BACK TO MONSTER HUNTER
[10:35 AM] Kamek: Wow
[10:36 AM] Kamek: That NBC guy totally flopped
[10:36 AM] Kamek: Sierra Leone coming up!!
[10:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...DOES THAT MEAN THEY SKIPPED DRAGON QUEST or does Dragon Quest only go once?
[10:37 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Before Sierra Leone is the "Russian Olympic Committee"
[10:37 AM] Kamek: 4 athletes
[10:37 AM] Kamek: They have Americans on their team
[10:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WOOHOOO
[10:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: KOOPATV'S EARTH BASE!

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Parade of Nations Sierra Leone flag waving
NBC doesn't care about Sierra Leone, but KoopaTV does. Greatly.
(We haven't really been around there since before their COVID-19 problems.)


[10:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...alright that didn't last long.
[10:39 AM] Kamek: Georgia is loud
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, it's downhill from here.
[10:39 AM] Kamek: Anyway...
[10:39 AM] Kamek: I need sleep
[10:39 AM] Kamek: I'm glad I was here for Sierra Leone
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I need sleep more, as someone competing sooooooon.
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But good night.
[10:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...I guess I'll be around still.
[10:40 AM] Kamek: Did you see the Syrian small child?
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah but she's not that small.
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: She's mature for her age. :x
[10:40 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol
[10:43 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: 'kay I guess Kamek carried the parade of nations commentary 'cause I got nothing to say anymore, even with Spain up there.
[10:44 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But they got a commercial break to encourage me to rethink my life choices.
[10:44 AM] Kamek: Is that good?
[10:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Went to get food. Back. Commercial still going.
[10:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC skipped Suriname, Sri Lanka, Slovakia, and Slovenia. And Seychelles.
[10:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And Equatorial Guinea. :(
[10:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: FROG'S THEME LOOPING IN HERE as Senegal walks in.
[10:49 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But yeah not only is NBC skipping countries but skipping gaming soundtracks.
[10:49 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Terrible.
[10:50 AM] Kamek: Hmm...
[10:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: South Koreaaaaaaa.
[10:51 AM] Kamek: If vortex was here we might have  less... Country bias
[10:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: REST IN PEACE
[10:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Chinese Taipei" appearing now. (AKA Taiwan)
[10:52 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WE SUPPORT YOU
[10:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Unlike a certain upcoming country.
[10:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It'd be hilarious if NBC skipped it.
[10:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Nah, doesn't seem like they will.
[10:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: IT'S CHINA.
[10:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: AKA the villains of Earth.
[10:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring the Chinese Communist Party, Tencent, and the origins of the Chinese Communist Party Virus that postponed these Olympics by a whole year.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Parade of Nations China communists
Reminder: Don't download Pokémon UNITE.


[10:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
[10:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
[10:56 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright now NBC is doing a commercial break.
[10:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which is pretty disappointing and insulting to a certain nation that's in line to be skipped.
[10:57 AM] Kamek: Bet they did it on purpose
[10:57 AM] Kamek: What nation is that
[10:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'll get to it when NBC gets to it!
[10:58 AM] Kamek: >> I'm not watching however I'm still commentating vicariously through you
[10:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, NBC just did a "coverage will resume shortly" so they aren't even showing real commercials at this point.
[10:59 AM] Kamek: I never expected NBC to be the villains of this reaction log
[10:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright they're back.
[10:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They were the last time!
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They skipped Denmark but didn't skip Germany.
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Laura Ludwig" a beach volleyball player.
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Hmph.
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (ROBO'S THEME)
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're showing Togo instead of skipping it.
[11:00 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Togo is the nation.
[11:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is coming after Moe the Clown said something very bad about the people of Togo a few years ago.
https://www.koopatv.org/2018/05/moe-clown-is-probably-racist.html
[11:01 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dominican Republic people dancing to Robo's Theme.
[11:01 AM] Kamek: Togo...
[11:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The last "T" country going now is Turkey.
[11:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Wait, no, the last is Tonga.
[11:03 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They got the guy without a shirt on.
[11:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Pita Taufatofua.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Pita Taufatofua Tonga shirtless oiled sweaty body flag bearer
We managed to get a screenshot of him in the 2018 Opening Ceremony, too.


[11:04 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Who was famous in previous ceremonies for his oiled skin gimmick.
[11:04 AM] Kamek: Oh my
[11:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're interviewing Lilly King, Olympic gold medalist for swimming, to skip several African nations.
[11:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And Nicaragua.
[11:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think she's a competitor to Wendy.
[11:06 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THEY'RE SKIPPING NEW ZEALAND?
[11:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I thought American NBC is contractually obligated to respect New Zealand.
[11:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: As a big ally of the USA.
[11:07 AM] Kamek: Oh dear
[11:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Up with Canada, United Kingdom, and Australia.)
[11:07 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're even skipping Norway.
[11:07 AM] Kamek: Were they this bad in Río?
[11:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think so.
[11:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But all I actually remember from Rio de Janeiro was Cappy appearing and taking over Shinzo.
[11:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break.
[11:08 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Brought to you by Starbucks"
[11:13 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC skipped... Haiti, Pakistan, Panama, Vanuatu, the Bahamas, and Papua New Guinea.
[11:15 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Palestine. >:(
[11:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wait, commercial break again?
[11:16 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They basically just came back for Palestine.
[11:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now they're back, skipping Bangladesh, Timor-Leste, Fiji, the Philippines, Finland... And Bhutan.
[11:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Team Puerto Rico!
[11:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But they really want to show Brazil.
[11:20 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Who are dancing.
[11:21 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah I think Dragon Quest is excluded from the loop list... or NBC keeps skipping it every time. Unclear.
[11:22 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're showing American Samoa (but not the USA).
[11:22 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The United States Virgin Islands next.
[11:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Speaking of the Vietnam War, here's Vietnam.
[11:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...lots of red, like China.
[11:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They know how to wear masks.
[11:23 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Benin are wearing pajamas or something.
[11:24 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break. Ew.
[11:27 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Break over, skipping Belarus.
[11:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Portugal "we see the joy on these faces" - NBC
[11:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You actually don't because they're wearing masks.
[11:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: HONG KONG
[11:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Hong Kong, China"
[11:31 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Hong Kong doing a very dignified walk.
[11:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Hong Kong gets their own flag, unlike Taiwan.
[11:32 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: KOOPATV SUPPORTS HONG KONG INDEPENDENCE.
[11:36 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're back. RIP skipped Marshall Islands, Madagascer, Malawi, Mali, Malta. They're playing the Final Fantasy Victory theme, which is right after the Dragon Quest theme. <.<
[11:38 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Mexico dancing to the stage.
[11:39 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: If Mexico does well in the Olympics, will Mexicans feel pride in the country and stop trying to enter the United States?
[11:42 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "For the first time ever Mongolia has a female flag bearer." Who cares?
[11:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Almost done with this parade.
[11:46 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Rwanda... Lesotho... Lebanon...
[11:47 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Obviously the Rs and Ls are together in the Japanese alphabet)
[11:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "We are just moments away from Team USA's big entrance." Then commercial break.
[11:48 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...If it were other countries they'd skip Team USA with the commercial break.
[11:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "The moment has arrived! Team USA is entering"
[11:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now NBC is doing some kind of special pre-recorded video for Team America.
[11:51 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which I'm the least interested in.
[11:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The video is still going because they're going over a lot of specific athletes.
[11:53 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And their life stories.
[11:54 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Which, again, these people are all just another competitor for Team Koopa.
[11:55 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dr. Jill Biden is clapping excitedly. I assume she's here instead of Joe Biden, because he would've fallen asleep. ...And I wouldn't blame him.
[11:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's some Americans wearing their masks incorrectly.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony Parade of Nations USA America flag delegation mask not covering nose
Why do so many people not realise the mask is supposed to cover your nose? (Right-most guy.)


[11:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: France follows.
[11:57 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...And they didn't last long. Now it's Japan.
[11:58 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wearing white and red to match their flag.
[11:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "As we look at some of the Team USA athletes..."

They put the camera on some dumb American girl who had her mask off and screaming.
[11:59 AM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And then realised she needs to put her mask on.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony performative mask wearing Team United States of America for camera
This whole mandatory mask thing is a joke, and people claiming they're oh-so-concerned about it are frauds.
This should be proof of that.
(And according to the Olympics regulations, this is behaviour that should be given consequences.)


[12:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So can they all get disqualified?
[12:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Faster" "Higher" "Stronger" "Together"
[12:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Coming up, a global musical moment you won't want to miss."
[12:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're doing things with rectangular prisms.
[12:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And a Tokyo 2020 flag.
[12:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Wrong year.)
[12:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And "18,000 drones".
[12:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "A vision for the world." Yikes.
[12:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...........
[12:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Are they singing "Imagine" in Japanese?
[12:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That's terrible.
[12:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Imagine there's no countries" I dunno that's sort of against the whole point of the Olympics.
[12:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Idiot one-world order propaganda.
[12:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're getting some dopey singer from every continent to sing their propaganda anthem.
[12:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC keeps showing the dumb Team USA people swaying left to right to their anti-capitalist chant.
[12:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't know why ethnostate Japan would want this song at their ceremony.
[12:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Surely Japan doesn't want to "live as one" with the world.
[12:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC skipped the president of the Tokyo 2020 organisation committee, and it seems like they're showing Thomas Bach instead.
[12:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "It is different from what all of us had imagined." Sick of that word.
[12:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Japan's Emperor appeared, and suddenly there were fireworks.
[12:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "He went off-script using the word commemorate instead of the word celebrate, fitting for these times." - Dumb NBC commentator
[12:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (In other words they just skipped the Emperor. Seems very disrespectful.)
[12:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now they'll be raising the Olympic Flag and eventually light the flame.
[12:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dumb NBC commentators reflecting how "beautiful" the Imagine song was performed.
[12:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Flag successfully raised.
[12:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Japan apparently invented the pictograms you see associated with each of the sports on the Olympics website and other places.
[12:33 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And they have an extended montage of these with a guy forming all of them.
[12:36 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Kamek would enjoy this.
[12:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: One nefarious Japanese guy in the control room.
[12:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Messing with the lights and the effects.
[12:38 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Moderated by a woman)

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony control room lights skit Japanese woman boss
While I dislike the implicit “the man is a weirdo idiot and the woman is hyper-competent” scenario,
I have nothing against this woman on a personal level!


[12:39 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Now there is a Kabuki theatre.
[12:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Plus a piano performance from Hiromi.
[12:42 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Hiromi's piano is awesome and no one cares about the Kabuki dude.
[12:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Arsonists here. Erm, torchbearers.
[12:47 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not very interesting.
[12:47 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ooh, plot twist.
[12:47 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Gave the flame to a wheelchairer.
[12:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Or, more accurately, to her wheelchair.
[12:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Since she's not holding it.
[12:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The torch-lighting area isn't wheelchair-accessible so it's passed off to someone who is more able.
[12:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And passed to Naomi Osaka.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Opening Ceremony torch flame passing Naomi Osaka
You see the steps behind Naomi? That's just level 1. There's way more to go.
No wheelchair can get through that.


[12:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The way up there is via steps. No ramp.
[12:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There are several layers of steps, actually.
[12:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Naomi is successfully lighting it.
[12:53 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now the whole stadium perimeter is on fire.
[12:53 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Good going.
[12:54 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break. ...I'd like to think it's over by now?
[12:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Back to NBC commentators, with them saying it was moving and "exquisitely beautiful."
[12:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And replaying Imagine for some reason.
[12:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Imagine climbing those stairs" - NBC commentator being ableist, since the wheelchair person will literally have to imagine it since they can't do it
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, that's over with.
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...
[1:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think NBC are bigger villains than China.



Ludwig will be competing in the Men's Épée Individual Fencing event on Sunday morning (Japan time) at Makuhari Messe Hall B. ...You're not allowed to watch due to the no-spectator policy, but he'll let you know how it went on Friday. Wish him skill! KoopaTV will hopefully also live-react to the Closing Ceremony, though not from Japan due to the Olympic Playbook regulations asking athletes to leave Japan upon finishing their event.


Ludwig then competed that Sunday in his fencing event. How'd he do? ...He didn't win a medal.
The Tokyo 2021 Olympic Games eventually came to an end. What happened in the Closing Ceremony? Ludwig and Kamek live-reacted to that, too!
It appears not everyone was so happy to hear the Dragon Quest Overture at the Opening Ceremony...

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