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Monday, April 27, 2015

Robert E. Stoutland and Confederate Memorial Day

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Memorialising our... predecessors.

You might think this is weird, but KoopaTV's staff has been trying to do a lot of themed Pokémon stuff over the years. Like, "Have the eight 2012 Republican presidential candidates be the eight gym leaders and figure out their types." Or "What eight Pokémon are closest to Mega Man Robot Masters?" (Seriously, a Mega Man-Pokémon crossover is just so obvious.) (Also as obvious: One of the answers is Magmortar.)

Or, in this case, "What would be a representative Pokémon team for the Confederate States of America?"

Since Gen 5 was released with Pokémon Black and Pokémon White (their names had no bearing on our decisions), we definitely settled on Stoutland as Confederate general Robert E. Lee.

Robert E. Lee Stoutland Confederate General Pokémon facial hair
Robert E. Stoutland by RawkHawk2010.

Over the years, we got some other ideas for the other slots. Well, it turns out that long before I made the Confederate Flag out of Super Mario Bros. sprites, I actually requested another videogame representation of the flag. See below:

Confederate Metagross rebel Stars and Bars cross CSA flag
Confederate Metagross, by Sadistic Medic.
(You won't find it in her collection though.)
 
While a lot of the United States and/or the rest of the world frowns at us clinging to Southern pride and heritage, I think we need a dose of that right now more than ever. In a philosophical sense, though some wouldn't mind another mass-secession.

KoopaTV has the same kind of attitude as the seceding folks in the Confederate States. We're determined to strive for a better world, not the world we're given. They were men of action, and so are we. That's part of what makes us different than any other site you visit.

What also makes us different is that we make productions like this (also by RawkHawk2010):



Rebel Crosser (whom Rawk showed off in his amazing "I Wanna Go South" article) and Nintendo of America president Reggie Fils-Aime showing off their Southern pride engaging in some central Southern activities. We know why Rebel Crosser is here (I mean, look at him!) but Reggie? Well, according to anonymous sources, Reggie Fils-Aime is actually a descendent of the Confederados who fled to South America after the Confederate States of America fell apart. Reggie always kept that part of his history secret to the world, but KoopaTV is fleshing it out.

Rebel Crosser Villager Reggie Fils-Aime Nintendo president Confederado Confederate States of America South Southerner good ol' boys
Just the good ol' boys...

Update 5/25/2015: Rawk didn't have "I Wish I Was in Stoutland" ready for Confederate Memorial Day, so it was released on Regular Memorial Day instead. Enjoy!:


Do you have other ideas for what Pokémon should join Team Confederate? KoopaTV also believes Lilligant belongs there, along with Whimsicott.


Ludwig tried to establish his Confederate-supporting credentials almost right after KoopaTV began by defending its flag.
Ludwig compared Union generals to Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance antagonists here.
For non-Confederate Memorial Day, KoopaTV honours its Troopas.
Could "I Wish I Was in Stoutland" be removed from YouTube in wide-spread efforts to whitewash the Confederate Flag?
You are not allowed to memorialise or depict the Confederate Flag, according to the App Store.
Robert E. Stoutland and Confederate Metagross appeared as the protagonists in KoopaTV's Capture the Confederate Flag game!

11 comments :

  1. Replies
    1. She says
      "yay, let them know i said thank you <3 <3 <3"

      Delete
  2. Thank you Ludwigonie Vonda Koopalicious

    ReplyDelete
  3. I assume you also want more black slaves you ugly fuckers

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nah, black slaves ain't good enough for us.

      Delete
    2. Yeah you're too scared of us atm to try and enslave us again lmaoo

      Delete
    3. Yeah.
      Back in the day, slaveowners were really terrified of slave revolts, so they kept 'em stupid and powerless.

      Nowadays, y'all still stupid, but apparently ain't powerless.

      Delete
    4. Still smarter than you since you white bitches couldn't even win that presidential election twice even though we had that only one nigga running.

      Delete
    5. We had a black dude on our side, too!

      He was KoopaTV's favourite Republican at the time!
      But then he got sabotaged by you terrified dudes who made shit up about him.

      Delete

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