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Tuesday, January 1, 2019

KoopaTV's December 2018 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - December and 2018 are over. They were barely around.

How am I already writing a newsletter reviewing December 2018? How is it 2019 already? That went by so fast. It turns out that in its release month, I played over 100 hours of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (and some other games too) and time passed by enormously quickly. In that time, KoopaTV also had an article every weekday again!

How did we manage to do all that? I dunno. It's beyond me. But now we lack a big shiny target to look forward to. Guess that means we better enjoy ourselves in the current moment. ...That sort of goes against the whole point of a newsletter reviewing the past, but, uh, right after you read this, think about the present. ...Anyway...

Oh, wait, no, the nominations for our Game of THAT Year 2018 are happening at the end of this week, with the winners on Monday. We can't move away from the past and go to the present just yet.

Top Five Recommended Experiences of December 2018

December 2018 was a great month for KoopaTV articles. Much better than the likes of November 2018. I'm surprised by the quality on display, especially since I don't really remember December existing. Dunno how we'll top that in 2019. Maybe we won't, so be sure to experience these articles (and everything else from December 2018 since it's worth it), listed in chronological order.
  1. Insight into the World of Light; What Happened to Wendy and for Whom Does She Fight?  — Tron Bonne being Wendy O. Koopa's Spirit match got Rawk interested into researching the Mega Man Legends antagonist.
  2. First Weekend Thoughts On Super Smash Bros. Ultimate — The KoopaTV staff spent the first weekend of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate having a Smashfest at our Sierra Leone HQ, so we all share our thoughts.
  3. Heroes vs. Villains: The Ultimate SplatfestSplatoon 2's December Splatfest pits heroes vs. villains against one another, and with King Bowser Koopa on Team Villains, it's little wonder which pick Ludwig supports!
  4. Kirby Star Allies Review — Complete Version — After waiting for all of the free DLC to come in so the game is content complete, Ludwig finally writes a full review of Kirby Star Allies.
  5. Mario Brutally Murders Petey Piranha (and people still play Mario Tennis Aces online) — Mario savagely murders Petey Piranha, who just wanted to play a friendly game of tennis with him.

Best Three Comments and One Worst Comment of December 2018

We got a good sampling of comments in December! Of course, I always want more comments.

Best comments in chronological order.
  1.  “It is a good thing I rushed because I got to experience the extreme AI difficulty of the characters that needed to be unlocked and I felt like i earned them all. Now their difficulty got patched to be less intense.” — ShinyGirafarig
  2. “I was not prepared to see the brutality depicted in that video. In one moment, Petey Pirahna, the poor gentle soul, was having the time of his life aspiring to become the next tennis champion. The next moment, he vanishes forever after Mario comes along and savagely murders him in cold blood. Whenever I finally get a chance to play Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, I'm going to revel in sending every last Mario off the stage. I swear on Petey's grave that Mario will pay.” — Kody B.
  3. “I can't think of where else to take this without getting SERIOUSLY bogged down in the more fiddly points of Zelda lore, which would rather suck the levity out of the whole thing, so I guess you "win" on the basis that I've stopped arguing. This was fun though. :)” — Lheticus Videre
ShinyGirafarig's comment got recognised there for being very timely. So timely that it got recognised in a KoopaTV article already. It takes a lot of skill to manage to affect the course of events with a comment (I immediately lost to the CPU Pichu when trying to unlock it after her comment), and it goes to show the power that you all have with your words. Use it wisely. (But not too wisely that you don't want to comment.)

Meanwhile, I hope Kody B. gets Super Smash Bros. Ultimate soon (and perhaps the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program prize can help make that happen) so he can slaughter that plumber in revenge for Petey's demise. Lheticus Videre used the word “levity” in his comment, which is a special thing for us. He also used it correctly and in an appropriate context. That said, I'm sure there are people out there that want KoopaTV to go deep into Zelda lore. Maybe we will some day. That whole discussion I had with him was good, since he challenged a bit of an absurd claim I made and pushed it a bit more when I defended my claim with an even more absurd claim. Fun is good.

There wasn't a legitimately bad comment in December. I have to have something here, though, so...

  1. “Since you linked the Salsa article i want to let you know I got my internet back up and running at the new place but still need to work on the kitchen (as well as everywhere else) so the homemade salsa is going to be delayed.” — ShinyGirafarig
I was really looking forward to that salsa, so this got worst comment because it made me upset that it never came. In fact, she still hasn't delivered the salsa. (But ShinyGirafarig also got a best comment for making me upset because she powered-up Pichu to make me lose to it... I don't know. It's all NUANCED in terms of how you go about it.)

KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program Round 23 RESULTS!

Objectively, the point total here sucks for a holiday big-prize KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program round. 143 points total. ShinyGirafarig got almost half of them, so good for her. Bad for the rest of you. Do you guys not like free money or what? Or... or is it KoopaTV's fault?! I mean, I know November sucked, but December alone wasn't exactly impressive either. I mean, last year's (2017) November–December was awesome.

Whatever, here are the results and prizes I have to give to people:

  1. ShinyGirafarig — 70 points — $25 Amazon code
  2. Kody B. — 30 points — Two Amazon codes worth $13.98
  3. Lheticus Videre — 27 points — $10 Nintendo eShop card code
  4. Samantha Lienhard — 8 points 
I'm assuming Lheticus prefers an eShop code to the Amazon codes, because he could've easily gotten second place if he wanted to.

Raffle Drawing

Remember when I said ShinyGirafarig had half the points for the round? Yeah, that matters, because she had a nearly one-in-two chance to win the additional $10 Nintendo eShop code raffle. And guess what? She did.

The RNG drew from between 1 and 143, and ShinyGirafarig would win if it was anywhere from 2 to 71.
RNG provided by

So... I'll be giving her an additional $10 Nintendo eShop code. Hope it's legible.

The least she could do is get us that homemade salsa.

Announcing KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program Round 24!

Did you know that 24 comes after 23? Yeah. Well, I'm going to give away yet another Luigi-faced $10 Nintendo eShop code for the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program round 24, lasting from today to February 27 at night.

You know the rules. If you don't, there's a whole page dedicated to the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program on the site. I recommend reading that, because if people actually did everything that they could to win, they'd win so easily. EASILY. Believe me.

Corrections Corner; December 2018

ShinyGirafarig found an instance of lazy copy-pasting on my part to create the list of characters I unlocked (in order) for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, where I copy-pasted the entry for Pokémon Trainer to make PAC-MAN's, but didn't erase the part where I mentioned Squirtle. (Everything else about it was changed, relevantly the Classic Mode intensity and Jigglypuff as my playable character.)

Ludwig was obviously in some kind of bad mood while writing the newsletter. Cheer him up by sharing KoopaTV to people and helping the website's activity. Thanks. Also, still no feedback forms, but Ludwig wants to hear your feedback in the comments section.

Last year's December 2017 newsletter is here.
Last month's November 2018 newsletter can be found here.
Next month's January 2019 newsletter (different year!) can be found here.
Next year's December 2019 newsletter is here. Feedback forms exist.


  1. I have played Smash for a couple of hours since then and have sent Mario flying to his death countless times. I think that it is safe to say that Petey Piranha has at last been avenged. The plumber hopefully learned a lesson or two about how cruel it is to murder innocent NPCs. If he hasn't and continues on his evil ways, he can expect even worse punishments in the future.

    P.S. I have redeemed the two gift cards. Thanks again for another great round.

  2. I try not to bite more than I can chew. Working on cleaning my stove and oven combo from plastic that the previous owner melted in it along with another upgrade to the kitchen and I should be all set for the homemade salsa.


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