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Wednesday, September 10, 2014

KoopaTV's Live Reactions to President Obama Addressing the Nation on ISIS

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Interrupting your regularly scheduled KoopaTV programming.

And THAT is why it's completely ridiculous and ruining the future of videogames! And ANOTHER thing...! Wait, what? WHAT DO YOU MEAN PRESIDENT BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS CUTTING US OFF? Dammit!

Right before Barack Obama starts his ISIS speech.
I was in the middle of ranting and he's not even HERE!
(I'm Nintendork 13 13, and RawkHawk2010 is himself.)

Nintendork 13 13 9:01 pm
    WE HAVE FOOTAGE
    OF A MICROPHONE
    ...AND NO OBAMA
    This is breaking news!

 RawkHawk2010 9:01 pm
    Maybe he bailed.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:01 pm
    KOOPATV WILL BRING YOU TO THE SCENE
    not that we have a choice
    Obama is taking over every TV station.
    Even ours!
    So we can see the picture of him bailing.

 RawkHawk2010 9:02 pm
    Is there something wrong with Obama's eyes?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:02 pm
    It's a stunt double.
    Took out Bin Laden
    and Al Qaeda
    (Who proceeded to wreck our embassy two years ago)

 Nintendork 13 13 9:03 pm
    (Or, 1 year and 364 days ago)

 RawkHawk2010 9:03 pm
    um
    "ISIS is not Islamic."

 Nintendork 13 13 9:03 pm
    You're ahead of me

 RawkHawk2010 9:03 pm
    Because

 Nintendork 13 13 9:03 pm
    I think.

 RawkHawk2010 9:03 pm
    most of the victims have been Islamic?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:03 pm
    "One of those groups is ISIL"

 RawkHawk2010 9:04 pm
    That's awful reasoning.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:04 pm
    I just got to ISIL is not Islamic

 RawkHawk2010 9:04 pm
    I thought this was ISIS.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:04 pm
    It is.

 RawkHawk2010 9:04 pm
    Who is ISIL

 Nintendork 13 13 9:04 pm
    Everyone calls it ISIS but the White House.
    "Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant"
    compared to "Islamic State of Iraq and Syria"

 RawkHawk2010 9:04 pm
    But yeah just cuz they kill muslims doesn't mean they're not muslims.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:04 pm
    Yeah.
    That's like saying that the KKK is not a white supremacist organization

 RawkHawk2010 9:05 pm
    Christians used to kill Christians all the time.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:05 pm
    because they kill white Republicans and Catholics
    and Jews.

 RawkHawk2010 9:05 pm
    Yeah.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:05 pm
    Obama hasn't detected specific plotting.

 RawkHawk2010 9:05 pm
    "The United States is meeting them."

 Nintendork 13 13 9:05 pm
    But they've threatened us.

 RawkHawk2010 9:05 pm
    "...with strength and resolved."
    resolve*

 Nintendork 13 13 9:05 pm
    Americans have joined ISIS
    and may come here to destroy us.
    (Like in Ferguson)
    (Recall the ISIS flag there)
    Why doesn't Obama just say "people"
    what's this "men women and children" shit?
    Announcement
    America leading coalition
    lead back terrorist threat.
    Degrade and destroy. Comprehensive and sustained.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:07 pm
    1. Systematic campaign of air strikes working with Iraqi government
    while Iraqi forces "go on offense".
    Will not hesitate to attack ISIS in Syria either.

 RawkHawk2010 9:07 pm
    So is this a war?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:08 pm
    2. Increase support of forces fighting terrorists on ground.
    475 additional service members.
    No combat mission.
    "We will not get dragged into another ground war in Iraq"
    (So if they're shot at they're not allowed to fight back)

 RawkHawk2010 9:09 pm
    (9:06:05 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) Americans have joined ISIS
    (9:06:11 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) and may come here to destroy us.
    (9:06:14 PM) [Koopa Keep]: (nintendork1313) (Like in Ferguson)

 RawkHawk2010 9:09 pm
    is this true

 Nintendork 13 13 9:09 pm
    Yes.
    KoopaTV referenced it I think.
    In the TTPO anniversary article.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:09 pm
    3. Continue to draw on counterterrorism capabilities to prevent attacks.
    4. Assist innocent civilians who got displaced
    http://therightscoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/cnn_isis_flag_ferguson.jpg

 RawkHawk2010 9:10 pm
    Is that Alex Jones?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:10 pm
    That's a CNN dude.
    John Kerry has been sent to ask Europe for help.
    "This is American leadership at its best."
    JOHN KERRY?
    AMERICAN LEADERSHIP AT ITS BEST?
    WHAT THE FUCK

 Nintendork 13 13 9:11 pm
    "It will take time to eradicate a cancer like ISIL."
    "Please understand how this will be different than the Iraq war."

 RawkHawk2010 9:12 pm
    That sounds politically incorrect.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:12 pm
    Yeah, it does.
    But since he said it's not a Muslim group
    it's okay.
    He's not offending any group!

 RawkHawk2010 9:12 pm
    Except people with cancer!

 Nintendork 13 13 9:12 pm
    ...oh.
    Tomorrow marks 13 years since 9/11.
    (Then he said next week is 6 years since the Great Recession)

 RawkHawk2010 9:13 pm
    Obama getting optimistic.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:13 pm
    Obama is bullshitting.
    About the economy.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:13 pm
    "We're closer to energy independence than we've been in decades."
    Well why didn't we get it when we were so close decades ago?

 RawkHawk2010 9:14 pm
    This sounds like the Kongversation that began with talking about DK getting terrible rep in Smash and then ending with the pipe dream of Diddy Kong Racing Wii U.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:14 pm
    dat ebola
    "It's America that's helping Muslim communities around the world fight for opportunity and tolerance and hope for the future."
    "We stand for freedom, for justice, for dignity."

 RawkHawk2010 9:15 pm
    Did he say vanquished or banquished?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:16 pm
    Banquished.
    Obama leaving.
    15 minutes.
    So.
    Thoughts?

 RawkHawk2010 9:18 pm
    Uh.
    Seemed aight I guess.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:18 pm
    Only surprising thing was that he gave an exact number of American servicedudes he's deploying.

 RawkHawk2010 9:19 pm
    Oh, transparency?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:19 pm
    But I mean, he's already doing the air strikes now, right?
    Well you want to be transparent on one side but

 RawkHawk2010 9:19 pm
    Like when Nintendo finally let you see how things were downloading in terms of bytes?

 Nintendork 13 13 9:19 pm
    ISIS is listening to this too.
    ...ha.
    (Obama probably took over the regularly scheduled programming for ISISTV too!)

 RawkHawk2010 9:20 pm
    I didn't like how there was such a huge initiative to separate this from religion/Islam.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:20 pm
    Yeah.

 RawkHawk2010 9:20 pm
    That can't be how things work.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:20 pm
    I get he doesn't want to upset Muslims... but why mention it at all?

 RawkHawk2010 9:21 pm
    In that case, a religion will NEVER be behind anything "bad."
    Because he wants to dissuade islamophobia from old white people who have already arrived there, I guess.

 Nintendork 13 13 9:21 pm
    oh
    Like me?
    (Too late!)


Stay tuned to KoopaTV! KoopaTV is now returning to regularly scheduled programming. Oh the difficulties of being a TV station...


KoopaTV later hears what Obama has to say on Executive Action on immigration by choice. 
Obama failed to defeat ISIS, but his successor finished the job.

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