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Monday, September 29, 2014

PlayStation Homeless

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - This will not help the Democrats in their mid-term elections!

Sony has announced that they will be closing the PlayStation Home service on March 31, 2015. But don't worry, they'll let you buy stuff up until December 3, 2014, with new content ending in November! And give you free stuff right before that closing.

My immediate thought is that this is pretty much like when Nintendo announced they would close Nintendo Wi-Fi Connection months in advance. People acted betrayed. Look at the comments section here! People supposedly spent thousands of dollars on PlayStation Home, and now those greedy bankers over at Sony are foreclosing those homes. Where is the justice?! It's the 2008 recession all over again! Funny thing is, is that PlayStation Home started in 2008. It's like, "Hey, I just lost my home, but now I can have a virtual one instead! Thanks, Sony!"

PlayStation Home foreclosed condemned
You're not eligible to refinance your mortgage.

Personally, I do not know of a single person who ever used this service. But apparently it was popular among some people out there. I had to research what it actually was to write this. Here's what I found:

It's a virtual space where you have your own avatar and interact with other people, like Second Life or The Sims. It functioned on many micro-transactions with people buying things from each other and from Sony using real money. It apparently was designed to be this super-integrated space for your PlayStation 3 and Vita with games playing a role in it, and being a place where developers could advertise their games. In other words, its value was that it was supposed to support the PlayStation effort by increasing awareness and fostering community, sort of like Miiverse if Miiverse had you pay for stuff.

But in true self-determination fashion, the users of PlayStation Home said screw all that, let's just talk to one another and buy stuff in a useless virtual economy. Since PlayStation Home is a PS3-only thing and not a PS4 thing, it's a no-brainer that Sony would like to just shut down the servers. After all, it's taking up hundreds or maybe thousands of terabytes to keep that thing up and it's for old hardware that definitely isn't Sony's focus. You know, like how Wi-Fi Connection was for Wii and DS when Nintendo wants to look to Wii U and 3DS. The Terms of Service for PlayStation Home (which also indicates it never got out of beta) even states,
"We reserve the right to suspend or cancel PlayStation®Home or your access to it at any time in our absolute discretion."
Guess you got to read your contracts carefully, right? Just like when buying a real home.

In the grand scheme of things, nothing was lost. Except all the people living in those Homes have nowhere to go. I doubt they bought house insurance or anything. What are they gonna do? Buy a PlayStation 4? I wouldn't recommend that. But hey, if you want a community of weirdos, go ahead and get a Wii U. Miiverse is the place for you. Just take all the money you were planning to spend on micro-transactions and spend it on the $300 for a Wii U. You can even get a bundle!

In the meantime, the homelessness rate is gonna go up a bit. Thanks, Obama!

Ludwig wrote this article just so he could make puns off the situation. If you are actually concerned over this closing, go ahead and express that in the comments. And if you do participate in Miiverse, Follow him at NNID PrinceOfKoopas.

Right when PlayStation Home was closing, Sony announced PlayStation Vue. Now that's done with too.
Ludwig kept making housing puns when the Pokémon HOME was being opened. (As opposed to closed.)


  1. When I got my PS3, I decided to check out PlayStation Home.... it got stuck on a loading screen and I never went back. xD

  2. And of course, I went through any Wi-Fi compatible DS game booklet... And you know what it says?
    Almost word-for-word it says:
    The Nintendo Wi-Fi connection service is eligible to end at any time.
    Yeah, you can get the notice years ahead... If you actually read the booklet closely.

    1. Exactly.

      Miiverse has the same message, by the way.
      As does every other service in existence.

      (Besides KoopaTV.)

    2. Good, because if that happens... I want... a two year notice!

    3. (It hasn't even been up for two years!)

      The notice we got on NSider was like... a week.

  3. Well I hate it when PS3 got closed down on it's home mortgage service.

    1. (I'm not sure how to reply to this besides chuckling.)


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