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Wednesday, September 16, 2020

KoopaTV's Live Reactions to the PlayStation 5 Showcase

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Scroll to the end if you just wanna know the release date and price.

After Sony's embarrassing PLAYSTATION 5 THE FUTURE OF GAMING conference from three months ago, which was big on grandiose statements and light on details, the company is trying again with the less risky title of “PlayStation 5 Showcase”, which will be our big view into the company's release for PlayStation 5, this holiday season.

Join myself and Heavy Lobster as we watch and critique Sony's second try at convincing us that the PlayStation 5 is the console to buy.


[3:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjji8NEW9lo

[3:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's over 400,000 dudes in this.

[3:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Maybe I should be using Twitch)

[3:58 PM] HeavyLobster: Hi.

[3:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This music is making me anxious.

[3:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And I'm just here to make fun of them.

[3:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So I have no reason to be anxious. <.<

[3:59 PM] HeavyLobster: Yeah.

[4:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's 16:00 now.

[4:00 PM] HeavyLobster: I'd say I'm taking time out of my busy schedule for this, but I'm not actually busy at all.

[4:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Still "stay tuned"

[4:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They got 20 seconds before they're officially late.

[4:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: LATE

[4:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright they started.

[4:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Pretty much exactly at 16:01.

[4:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They started with an astronaut looking out like that "always has been" meme.

[4:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Which I'm seeing all of the time now, and I dunno if that's because of the meme's appeal or that's a commentary on how nothing is changing)

[4:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I was gonna ask how you know, but that was a Chocobo.

[4:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And it says Square Enix.

[4:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This looks edgier than FF15.

[4:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "You should not be out of doors."
Quarantine?

[4:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (This trailer has been incoherently paced)

[4:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There is a history-shaping crystal legacy, but that's gonna end soon, apparently.

[4:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "I'll kill you."

[4:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring a bunch of dudes looking forward into the camera.

[4:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: LOL

[4:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: PLAYSTATION CONSOLE EXCLUSIVE*



*ALSO AVAILABLE ON PC


PlayStation 5 Showcase exclusive available on PC Final Fantasy XVI Deathloop
This screen later appeared for DEATHLOOP.


[4:06 PM] HeavyLobster: Switch + PC combo still undefeated.

[4:07 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That black kid had a snowball from INSIDE his house?

[4:07 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So does he just not have a roof or what?

[4:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Is Brian Horton of Insomniac Games appearing also captured PlayStation 5 footage?

[4:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Let's not shoot each other, alright?"

Then he got kicked.

...To be fair, he only forbade shooting.

[4:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: wtf it's the Sword of the Creator

[4:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Random enemy with a mini-cutscene got the extendible sword-whip.

[4:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: His quicktiming event got the bus AND the bridge to fall.

[4:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (That's not supposed to happen, morally.)

[4:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (That's not a pun off "Morales")

[4:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (...though I should pretend it was.)

[4:16 PM] HeavyLobster: PS5 confirmed transphobic because JK Rowling.

[4:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: If it's not exclusive, then what?

[4:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Hogwarts Legacy" 2021

[4:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Weird intermission, annnnd...

[4:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Hi everyone, Dan Vondrak at Raven Software.

[4:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Significantly enhance the overall experience of wha-... Black Ops?

[4:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: COLD WAR?

[4:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: IRAN HOSTAGE CRISIS?

[4:17 PM] HeavyLobster: Gotta tear down all the statues at Hogwarts because of its legacy of hate.

[4:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So this is Carter sucking?

[4:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Let's go find this shithead." - Friendly NPC, apparently denigrating the hostages they're supposed to rescue? I dunno.

[4:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Triangle for Sniper Rifle, with a cutscene featuring him shooting the wrong guy.

[4:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Even though Sniper Rifle has more ammo, they decide to rush in guns blazing instead of shooting again.

[4:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Typical Jimmy Carter screw-up.

[4:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright this is just messy now.

[4:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "THIS WASN'T PART OF THE PLAN." Well duh.

[4:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Call of Duty Black Ops Cold War, coming Holiday 2020.

[4:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Starting THIS FRIDAY, you can play the alpha version for free*.


Call of Duty Black Ops Cold War ALPHA PlayStation 5 September 18 to 20
Obviously, the fact that you can play a version this weekend means that it's not a NEXT-GEN game.
(Also, I'll be busy with, uh, holidays.)
Also, lol Germany and Japan. Based on the Cold War, but still treated like a World War II game.


[4:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We're halfway through this.

[4:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Chris what the hell" Resident Evil?

[4:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: YUP

[4:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: CAPCOM logo.

[4:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Featuring a creepy witch.

[4:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And a backstory.

[4:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With a girl running away from her mom, which seems to have ended poorly for them.


Resident Evil Village 8 VIII mom daughter girl vine folklore local tale
That girl is getting herself in trouble, but can we talk about how thin mom is?
Did she adopt? Or was she playing a TON of Ring Fit Adventure?


[4:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright I remember this black-people assassin time loop thing from the first PlayStation 5 conference.

[4:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Got a guy named "Egor".

[4:27 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Who is supposed to be assassinated)

[4:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: In front of a bunch of monitors that all say "KILL".

[4:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: See, the Jimmy Carter minions could've used this guy. He can kill TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE, as opposed to shooting one guy with a sniper rifle and... failing the second guy even though they're right next to each other.

[4:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Deathloop is coming PlayStation 5 (and also PC) in 2021.

[4:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: By Bethesda so I dunnooooo.

[4:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Though I appreciate the style.

[4:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: CAPCOM again.

[4:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Bringing you Devil May Cry 5... SPECIAL EDITION.

[4:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (What if they announce Ace Attorney at this?)

[4:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm sure CAPCOM will tell us what's special about the special edition at a later time.

[4:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Available digitally at launch"

[4:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...is it available physically at launch, too?

[4:34 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (No comment on Oddworld Soulstorm other than that the trailer tried to make mundane things look cool with a soundtrack)

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is scaaaary.

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dystopian robo waifu trying to kill you?

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: YEAH

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: DEFINITELY

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh eww.

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Five Nights at Freddy's

[4:35 PM] HeavyLobster: Eww.

[4:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright then I guess "scary" was the point.

[4:36 PM] HeavyLobster: That forced jumpscare.

[4:36 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well they succeeded. >.>

[4:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm thinking Souls is scarier than it should be after that.

[4:39 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: YOU DIED

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So after dying, Sony shows...

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...the price?

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No?

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No.

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I figured we'd have to go to hell to see that.

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: OH

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: IT'S FORTNITE

[4:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NEVERMIND IT'S HELL

[4:41 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Coming to PS5 Available at Launch"

[4:41 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's a new PlayStation Plus benefit for PlayStation 5.

[4:41 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Rather than just telling us what it is they're showing a game montage.

[4:42 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I guess that's a SUSPENSE technique.

[4:42 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol The Last of Us

[4:42 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Persona 5 is there.

[4:43 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Enjoy a selection of generation-defining PlayStation 4 games"

[4:43 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Alright so I guess the montage was the benefit.

[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now it's a bunch of camera angles of the console hardware.

[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Including where one cannot stick their head.

[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: $499 and $399


PlayStation 5 price digital version edition $499 $399
Important, November 12 countries are:
United States of America, Japan, Canada, Mexico, Australia, New Zealand, South Korea.
Rest of the world (November 19) excludes China, which has no date.


[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: November 12 in important countries besides Europe.

[4:44 PM] HeavyLobster: Yep.

[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: November 19 everywhere else (with Europe)

[4:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "So now you know."

[4:45 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Well, there goes 599 US dollars meme.

[4:46 PM] HeavyLobster: I have a strong suspicion they went out of their way to avoid that price point.

[4:47 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Reminder Xbox Series X is also $499, while whatever the Xbox Series S is is $299)

[4:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (but coming out days earlier)

[4:48 PM] HeavyLobster: The all-digital one is cheaper I guess.

[4:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And it's over.

[4:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Uhhhh I don't really have any commentary. I was hoping they'd say stupid things like PLAYSTATION 5 IS THE FUTURE OF GAMING for me to make fun of but they didn't.

[4:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So good for them, I guess.

[4:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Still not the future of gaming.)

[4:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (...well I guess technically it's gaming, and it takes place in the future, but...whatever.)

[4:50 PM] HeavyLobster: I have no opinion on it. It's fine, but I don't feel the need to budge from Switch + PC.

[4:51 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Noting the "PLAYSTATION 5 EXCLUSIVE* *lol it's on PC" thing appeared twice.

[4:51 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: For Final Fantasy 16 and for, uh, that timeloop thing.

[4:51 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: DEATHLOOP

[4:51 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And those were the most interesting stuff, soooooo...

[4:51 PM] HeavyLobster: Yeah.

[4:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: meh

PlayStation 5 Showcase gameplay trailers YouTube videos Five Nights at Freddy's
You know your console fanbase sucks when the most popular trailer is for Five Nights at Freddy's.



Did you have feelings that exceeded Ludwig's “meh”? Share them in the KoopaTV comments section below! (Including what console you'll be buying in November... if any.)

3 comments :

  1. CAPCOM says:

    As a quick recap: Devil May Cry 5 Special Edition will be launching digitally Day 1 on PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X / Xbox Series S. We’re also working on a physical version, launching at a later date, and will be offering Vergil as paid DLC for Xbox One, PS4 and PC.

    The SPECIALness involves playable Vergil, Turbo Mode (faster gameplay speed), Legendary Dark Knight (enemies spawn in hordes), ray tracing (prettier graphics), and better frame rates.

    ReplyDelete
  2. With some major releases including Miles Morales, Horizon: Forbidden West, and Sackboy also releasing on the PS4, I do not see any reason for most to purchase a PS5 yet. Overall, I thought this presentation was weaker than the one from three months ago because at least that one showed some new interesting titles. There were not any reveals in this showcase that appealed to me and would encourage me to upgrade to the PS5 immediately. The price certainly does not help it any either. It will be interesting to see how well this console and the new Xbox sells with the majority of people having reduced income.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. People won't have reduced income for the vast majority of the PS5's/Xbox Series' lifespans!

      But, yeah, there's no compelling event for one to get a PS5 at launch.

      Delete

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