January 14 2020 Democrat Presidential Primary Debate 7 ANALYSIS!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - We're about to be done wasting time!

Welcome to KoopaTV's first politics article of 2020! I'm here to analyse, in KoopaTV style, the seventh Democrat Party presidential primary debate that just occurred tonight (or last night, or whenever you read this) conducted by the FAKE NEWS professionals at CNN. On stage and vying to become the next president of the United States of America are Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, Amy Klobuchar, Pete Buttigieg, and Tom Steyer. Read about the all of the debates and the candidates here. (It's even updated to reflect that the likes of Marianne Williamson and Cory Booker dropped out very recently!)

The first actual votes in this process occur in a few weeks at the beginning of February in Iowa, and Iowa is where this debate physically takes place. 

But there's only six people in this debate, while much more will be trying to win the Iowa caucus soon. Disappointed? I am, and so should you. My favourites aren't even up there, which leaves me with some difficult decisions. (More on that at the end of the article.)

For now, let's cover the debate that actually happened, not the debate we wished happened. First, debate talking time, as calculated by CNN themselves:

A lot of Joe Biden's talking time is as a result of him insisting in answering questions in a timely manner.
Amy Klobuchar went over every time!

Wolf Blitzer, CNN moderator, started by asking the candidates why they'd be the best Commander in Chief given increased USA-Iran tensions. Answers were basically “I have good judgment to avoid war to begin with.” Based on voting against (or for, but acknowledged as a mistake) for the Iraq War. Pete Buttigieg, however, had a young-person point of view and said the debates of the past won't apply so well to the challenges of the future, many of which haven't been figured out yet, like cyber-war.

Meanwhile, Fraudulent Elizabeth Warren was talking about challenging financial institutions for why she's the best Commander in Chief. Doesn't make any sense.

Still, at least the Democrats that are on stage have a general agreement that a broad, infinite “authorisation for use of military force” is bad. And to get “coalitions” of other countries so their military troops get shot instead of American ones, which is a worthy goal for any American president, I suppose. I'd love to hear Tulsi Gabbard's thoughts on all of this. They spend the most time talking about her signature issue when she's not around.

Bernie Sanders believes that trade with other countries and climate change are the same issue (and he is “sick and tired” of people thinking otherwise), which... no. That's not the case! Every other candidate (besides Tom Steyer, who sees ALL issues as climate change) supports the United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement (USMCA) because it's at least marginally better than the North America Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA), so might as well ratify it now and improve it later. 

The idiot moderators tried to start a gender war between Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren by claiming, without evidence, that Bernie Sanders told Elizabeth Warren that a woman can't win the presidency. He denied saying that and said it's such a blatantly stupid statement that it's inconceivable he could have said it. But Fraudulent Elizabeth Warren, and the moderator teaming up with her, pretty much said he said that, and Fraudulent Elizabeth Warren said she (and Amy Klobuchar) never lost an election. CNN is fake news and sucks. Just listen to this.

🙄 #DemDebate pic.twitter.com/KGpKRX6r9T

— Secular Talk (@KyleKulinski) January 15, 2020

Fraudulent Elizabeth Warren also claims that women outperform men ever since President Donald John Trump was elected, so you should elect a woman. She also claimed that no one besides her has beaten an incumbent Republican in an election in 30 years—which, despite it being a specific number that she pre-planned as an attack line, is mathematically untrue; as pointed out by Bernie Sanders. Bernie Sanders defeated Republican Congressman Peter Plympton Smith in November 1990, which is within 30 years from January 2020. If women winning elections is a function of them being a woman, is Fraudulent Elizabeth Warren failing at math a function of her being a woman, too? Her math also fails when it comes to how she plans to pay for all of her economic plans. Senator Bernie Sanders does better on the math front. I miss Andrew Yang, who actually made math the central plank of his campaign.

You can SEE Elizabeth Warren trying to do mental math, but failing to carry the one.
29 years and 2 months is within Elizabeth Warren's arbitrary 30 year time period.

After yet another healthcare discussion and then a childcare discussion... There's a free college discussion. It's a big discussion point about whether billionaires’ children should be able to have free public college. No one is talking about that it's a pointless discussion, because billionaires will send their children to private colleges.

After the commercial break, there is a completely pointless discussion about impeachment. Then fear-mongering on climate change. Then an individualised question to every candidate about their biggest challenge. Elizabeth Warren believes she can unite the country because she can't convince her Republican brothers on her policies. What?

Rankings

I didn't get much into this in the main article text, but here are the Super Contest winners for each category for this seventh debate:

• Beauty: Amy Klobuchar
• Cool: Bernie Sanders
• Cute: Joe Biden
• Smart: Bernie Sanders
• Tough: Bernie Sanders

The Future of Debate Analyses

Let's be frank here. The Democrat Party is, once again, rigging their primary process to not reflect the will of the American people. The reason why the candidates we'd like to see on the stage (namely Tulsi Gabbard and Andrew Yang) weren't on the stage is because it was... actually impossible for them to qualify. The qualifications included 225,000 unique donors, and certain polling thresholds in Democrat Party-approved polls, which require specific and completely arbitrary combinations of polling sponsors to qualify. If a different combination or other outlet (which may be considered very trustworthy and top-tier by the rest of the world, but not approved by the Democrat Party) does a poll, it doesn't count. In the period between the sixth debate and the end-date for this debate, there... weren't any approved state-wide polls. So... that locked out, say, Andrew Yang, who had a stellar performance in the sixth debate (especially because he actually got some amount of speaking time), but whatever boost from that debate wouldn't be reflected in approved polls because there weren't any. But when you include unapproved polls, Andrew Yang was polling better than candidates like Amy Klobuchar and Tom Steyer. For its part, the Democrat Party refused to sponsor its own polling or even incentivise the polling companies.

Assuming this continues, and it likely will because the Democrat Party enjoys meddling in this sort of thing, there's no heroes in these debates. There's no point. It's an hours-long chore. I've read your KoopaTV Feedback Form responses. You guys don't even really like this content. Normally, that's not reason enough, but I don't like watching these and writing these if there's no protagonist like Tulsi Gabbard or Andrew Yang.

Bernie Sanders having many, many 1-on-1s with Hillary Clinton throughout 2016 wasn't compelling content for KoopaTV to cover, so we stopped after the second one. The fact we got so far should be a testament to how fair & balanced KoopaTV is! But as Bernie Sanders would say...

Plus, the debate frequency is going to go from once a month (2019) to three times a month (February, 2020) so now is a perfect time to stop before KoopaTV does more politics blogging than game-blogging.


KoopaTV will cover debates again probably when there's the general election debates, assuming those happen. Ludwig still wants to make sure that the likes of Elizabeth Warren doesn't win anything, so you may find at least an article specially written just to trash her in the future. CNN also needs to stop hosting debates because they are the worst.