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Monday, February 26, 2018

KoopaTV's Live Reactions to the PyeongChang 2018's Closing Ceremony

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The Olympics was underwhelming, but will it close with a bang?

It feels like we just covered the PyeongChang 2018 Opening Ceremony, and now we have the Closing Ceremony. This is the big moment that we've been leading up to since... well, Friday where we said we'd cover this.

Due to scheduling confusion and conflict, this log is just me and Rawk, with Wendy making a cameo appearance sometime during it. Still, that's enough KoopaTV staff reaction power to judge the likes of South Korea and NBC, and the always-omnipresent Thomas Bach.

[7:58 PM] Rawk: I ain't got time for this.
[7:58 PM] Rawk: Too deep into Ghost Trick.
[7:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...
[7:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Are you serious?
[7:58 PM] Rawk: ya
[7:59 PM] Rawk: unless I do both at the same time.
[7:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'd rather be doing other things than this, but I'm still going to commit to our promise of coverage. <_<
[7:59 PM] Rawk: Ooh, maybe I can play Ghost Trick during all the commercials.
[7:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You know there will be a lot of those.
[8:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "COVERAGE TO BEGIN SHORTLY"
[8:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: refresh
[8:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...still says that.
[8:00 PM] Rawk: Gonna assume Vortex is playing Breath.
[8:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm gonna assume he's sleeping.
[8:00 PM] Rawk: Twizzlers
[8:01 PM] Rawk: Like Poles But Edible
[8:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: IVANKA TRUMP

Ivanka Trump PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony
It's Ivanka Trump, in PyeongChang.

[8:01 PM] Rawk: I keep thinking this narrator is Lester Holt.
[8:01 PM] Rawk: Holy shit.
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ivanka likes curling.
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And called everyone losers.
[8:02 PM] Rawk: For NBC she's not She Who Shall Not Be Named
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ivanka wants to try curling.
[8:02 PM] Rawk: Thought they would've banned her.
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "MORE OF THAT INTERVIEW TOMORROW MORNING...ON TODAY."
[8:02 PM] Rawk: "THEY HUMANIZED HER!"
[8:02 PM] Rawk: "BOYCOTT NBC!"
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: TWO Russian athletes failed doping tests.
[8:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We only covered one.
[8:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wot is this recap shit?
[8:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Where is the ceremony?
[8:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I knew we should've watched the 6 AM live broadcast.
[8:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I woke up at like, 6:20 AM.
[8:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And then went back to sleep.
[8:04 PM] Rawk: Was that Chris Wallace talking?
[8:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But I COULD'VE gotten up.
[8:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're recapping Olympics from decades ago.
[8:04 PM] Rawk: NBC has to catch everyone up on what happened the past two weeks you know.
[8:04 PM] Rawk: Most people only watch the opening and closing ceremonies.
[8:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They just recapped the 2002 Salt Lake Olympics and 2014 Sochi.
[8:04 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Like us?
[8:05 PM] Rawk: Yes.
[8:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I watched USA and Canada at the bar.
[8:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: In ice hockey.
[8:05 PM] Rawk: I did that with Code Geass and Breaking Bad.
[8:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But it kept switching to commercial breaks so it wasn't watchable.
[8:05 PM] Rawk: First and last three episodes.
[8:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NBC sucks.
[8:05 PM] Rawk: I wonder how that would've worked with Ace Attorney.
[8:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Why is Mia dead?"
[8:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Not just dead, but spiritually channeled.
[8:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: If you skip 1-2 nothing in the rest of the series will make sense.
[8:07 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You can skip 1-1 and 1-3.
[8:07 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Who is this guy, a Goomba?

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony NBC sports Mike Tirico
His real name is Mike Tirico, but we know him as Goomba Man.

[8:08 PM] Rawk: You made that exact same comparison during the DNC.
[8:08 PM] Rawk: Just with a stout woman.
[8:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wait, is that Lester Holt?
[8:09 PM] Rawk: That's what I thought.
[8:09 PM] Rawk: But no.
[8:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That guy's face is too round.
[8:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So who the hell is that?
[8:11 PM] Rawk: Maybe he's being groomed as Holt's successor.
[8:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I screenshotted him as -NBC-Goomba-man
[8:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: He's back.
[8:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Star-Spangled Banner playing in PyeongChang" ugh
[8:12 PM] Rawk: Is anyone singing?
[8:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No.
[8:12 PM] Rawk: Not that I'm complaining.
[8:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's much better as an instrumental than with words.
[8:12 PM] Rawk: wtf at that girl's hair.
[8:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh these people are singing.
[8:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Terribly.
[8:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That girl is eating her medal like those gamer girls eat their controllers.
[8:13 PM] Rawk: That hair looked worse than Purple Hair Lady's from Star Wars.
[8:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Not sure if gamer girls actually do that)
[8:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: GOOMBA MAN REFERENCING TOKYO.
[8:14 PM] Rawk: We're definitely watching Tokyo.
[8:14 PM] Rawk: No excuses.
[8:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Oh he's advertising "The Olympic Channel"
[8:14 PM] Rawk: That sounds awful.
[8:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So no Ghost Trick excuse? :open_mouth:
[8:14 PM] Rawk: Is it just reruns of past Olympicses?
[8:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Check your local listings" (you won't find the Olympic Channel on KoopaTV)
[8:14 PM] Rawk: Some in black-and-white?
[8:14 PM] Rawk: I won't still be playing Ghost Trick in 2020 btw.
[8:15 PM] Rawk: Or that's the plan.
[8:15 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Unless you pull a Layton.
[8:15 PM] Rawk: lol
[8:15 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But you're almost done with the game, so...
[8:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You might finish by the end of this log, 'cause who knows how much NBC will stall this.
[8:16 PM] Rawk: I forgot about Biggie Smalls.
[8:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I forgot about Folgers.
[8:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Finally, Closing Ceremony.
[8:17 PM] Rawk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utHtt4lgplY
[8:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Terry Gannon.
[8:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And some weird gay guy.
[8:18 PM] Rawk: That's a dude?
[8:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I....think.
[8:18 PM] Rawk: I thought you were talking about the dude on the left.
[8:18 PM] Rawk: And thought you had exceptional GAYdar.
[8:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No that's Gannon.
[8:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dude's talking.
[8:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: BTW switch your name to RawkHawk2010.
[8:19 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Beijing is apparently hosting in 2022.
[8:19 PM] RawkHawk2010: who the hell even is that person?
[8:19 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The other two are Tara Lipinski and Johnny Weir.
[8:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnny_Weir
[8:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wikipedia says he is known for his work in LGBTQ activism.
[8:20 PM] RawkHawk2010: Maybe he'll give Phoenix Wright amnesia again.
[8:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And his picture is captioned, "Weir at the 2010 GLAAD Media Awards"
[8:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: and he was married to a guy named "Victor Voronov" but divorced after 4 years.
[8:20 PM] RawkHawk2010: "Jessie Diggins"
[8:21 PM] RawkHawk2010: JESSIE
[8:21 PM] RawkHawk2010: DIGGINS
[8:21 PM] RawkHawk2010: I wanna be named Jessie Diggins.
[8:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Commercial break.
[8:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think.
[8:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't know.
[8:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: Treehouse Masters has brilliant commercialing, where the first commercial of the break tricks you into thinking you're still watching the show.
[8:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They just showed a recap of Jessie Diggins winning the first USA Cross-Country skiing gold medal winner.
[8:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: Fuck Apple.
[8:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: Did they just say that was the Black Knight?
[8:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: no
[8:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: They said it was the _ Knight.
[8:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We'll see it when they replay the commercial.
[8:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're showing me a commercial for "Bounce", which is obviously a black-oriented show.
[8:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Was that targeted?
[8:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: I got it during the last break.
[8:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: And thought it was an entire channel.
[8:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WE'RE BACK.
[8:26 PM] RawkHawk2010: A BET competitor.
[8:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We're finally starting.
[8:26 PM] RawkHawk2010: Aside from the one that does nothing but play reruns of 80's black sitcoms.
[8:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't know wot I'm looking at.
[8:26 PM] RawkHawk2010: And hosted Amirosa's The Apprentice spinoff.
[8:26 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Lots of differently coloured circles.
[8:27 PM] RawkHawk2010: Do we know any Koreaboos?
[8:27 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Do K-poppers count?
[8:27 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...Or is that the entirety of being a Koreaboo?
[8:27 PM] RawkHawk2010: yeah if they're obsessed
[8:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wot other cause would get someone to be a Koreaboo?
[8:28 PM] RawkHawk2010: There are Korean games.
[8:28 PM] RawkHawk2010: Like that Black Desert one Wendy plays.
[8:28 PM] RawkHawk2010: Why do these people look Splatoon'd.
[8:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: @Wendy O. Koopa  help commentate
[8:28 PM] RawkHawk2010: They've all been Splat.
[8:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm not sure what Splatoon as a verb is. <_<
[8:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol they messed up where the Olympic circles were projected
[8:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ew French.
[8:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Thomas Bach is coming back.
[8:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Ivanka is there.


PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony Moon Jae-in Ivanka Trump balcony
Ivanka Trump actually at the ceremony.

[8:30 PM] RawkHawk2010: I didn't recognize her.
[8:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: .............................
[8:31 PM] RawkHawk2010: Maybe the Trumps are so baked into society that I've gone Trump-blind.(edited)
[8:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Korean furries?
[8:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Furry outfits worn by elementary schoolers.

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony white tiger elementary schoolers fursuit furry costume South Korea
The young legion of furries from elementary school.

[8:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: Samurais.
[8:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wot samurais?
[8:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: The ones the furries just interacted with.
[8:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: rofl
[8:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Jang Sa-ik singing.
[8:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Dunno who he is.
[8:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: I thought they were about to sing our anthem.
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: When it began with "OOOOOOOH!"
[8:33 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Shell-Spangled Banner?
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: America's
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: Thought it was gonna be "Oh say you can see"
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: "Oh say can you see"*
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: I think.
[8:33 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Shell-Spangled starts with, "OH SAY CAN YOU REAAAAAD, BY YOUR MONITOR'S DULL LIIIIGGHT"
[8:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: Dammit I don't even know the first line of that shit.
[8:35 PM] RawkHawk2010: Should babies be owning smartphones?
[8:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No.
[8:35 PM] RawkHawk2010: Some say it prepares them for the real world.
[8:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No one should own a smartphone.
[8:35 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Devil devices.
[8:36 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Rock music.
[8:36 PM] RawkHawk2010: Reminder that Ludwig was saying that about chat applications more sophisticated than AIM.
[8:36 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: 13 year old. Yang Tae-Hwan.

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony Yang Tae-Hwan Korean guitarist rocker 13 years old
Here's Yang Tae-Hwan. He looks funny.

[8:36 PM] RawkHawk2010: Cue Rawk Hawk theme.
[8:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I can't help but laugh with that gay commentator.
[8:37 PM] RawkHawk2010: This skit is stupid.
[8:38 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're gonna play Bowser's Castle 2.
[8:38 PM] RawkHawk2010: METAL
[8:38 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I didn't know metal was an all-caps word.
[8:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: 50th Miss Korea pageant queen.
[8:40 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The commentators just said the same thing at the same time.
[8:41 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Queen of the Closing Ceremony!"
[8:41 PM] RawkHawk2010: btw Metal Employs Tall All Letters
[8:41 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ............
[8:42 PM] RawkHawk2010: Is Japan gonna do anything at this?
[8:43 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They'll have a marcher.
[8:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The real question is... Will Cappy do anything besides have a random guy run on stage?
[8:44 PM] RawkHawk2010: Believe in Cappy.
[8:45 PM] RawkHawk2010: At first I thought A Wrinkle in Time was an Akila at the Bee sequel when I saw the preview in theatres.
[8:46 PM] RawkHawk2010: Akeelah*
[8:46 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Time for the athletes to join the party"
[8:46 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's Japan's flag.
[8:46 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Along with every other flag.
[8:47 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Jessie Diggins is known as "the glitter fairy."
[8:48 PM] RawkHawk2010: That's a lot of red hats.
[8:48 PM] RawkHawk2010: :cappy:
[8:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...uh oh.
[8:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're chanting "CANADA! CANADA! CANADA!"
[8:49 PM] RawkHawk2010: I like Ivanka being here.
[8:49 PM] RawkHawk2010: It's Trump influence that seems...casual?
[8:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: What is this music? Sounds like an anime ending theme.
[8:49 PM] RawkHawk2010: aka a Trump is here but isn't being made the center of the entire thing.
[8:50 PM] RawkHawk2010: Except by me right now.
[8:50 PM] RawkHawk2010: And not sure.
[8:50 PM] RawkHawk2010: "this feeling of stress"
[8:50 PM] RawkHawk2010: music suddenly becomes stressful
[8:51 PM] RawkHawk2010: This sounds like something from DKCR.
[8:52 PM] RawkHawk2010: Like one of those Rocket Barrel themes.
[8:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Reminds me of Grant Kirkhope.
[8:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I think of him now as an Ubisoft guy and not a Rare guy.
[8:53 PM] RawkHawk2010: Yeah he's probably associated with Rabbids permanently.
[8:53 PM] RawkHawk2010: Since that'll obviously be getting a sequel.
[8:55 PM] RawkHawk2010: .......a That's 70 Show commercial?
[8:55 PM] RawkHawk2010: That was random as hell.
[8:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah I got that several commercials ago.
[8:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WE'RE BACK.
[8:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Support Hilary Knight and Team USA"
[8:55 PM] RawkHawk2010: I hate that main girl on the cast.
[8:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: yikes I thought they were gonna say "Support Hillary Clinton"
[8:56 PM] RawkHawk2010: She's like the Sheldon Cooper of 70's.
[8:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: That 70s Show does remind me of Big Bang Theory.


[8:57 PM] RawkHawk2010: The vocals are making all of the music worse.
[8:57 PM] RawkHawk2010: It's like they aren't synced with what's playing.
[8:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Speaking of China, I spent my morning reading the Wikipedia article on Puyi.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puyi
[8:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: He was the last emperor of China and the puppet emperor of Manchuria.
[8:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Very interesting life story.
[8:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: It's one of those narrative Wikipedia articles.
[8:58 PM] RawkHawk2010: Manchuria makes me think of churros.
[8:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: "CHANSEEEEEEEEEY!"
[9:01 PM] RawkHawk2010: I've always thought girls on shoulders was more lewd than how other people see it.
[9:02 PM] RawkHawk2010: You literally have her loins on your neck.


[9:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Madame Loins)
[9:02 PM] RawkHawk2010: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYll1Sve1NM
[9:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Korean athletes entering.
[9:05 PM] RawkHawk2010: These vocals are bad.
[9:05 PM] RawkHawk2010: And they're from a grandma.
[9:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: wtf David Wise
[9:06 PM] RawkHawk2010: Oh yeah.
[9:06 PM] RawkHawk2010: Did you screencap that?
[9:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: no
[9:06 PM] RawkHawk2010: dammit lol
[9:07 PM] RawkHawk2010: So did girls just do a hell of a lot more for America than dudes this olympics?
[9:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Besides Curling.
[9:08 PM] RawkHawk2010: Kawaii Korean becoming dizzy at her own flag-waving.


PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony flag waving Korean girl
I like that guy on the left looking at her in all his low-resolution glory.

[9:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "It's DRONE TIME, BABY!" - Johnny the gay guy

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony tiger drones in the sky
The drones come back.

[9:09 PM] RawkHawk2010: I can't keep up with the evolution of drones.
[9:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The tiger is waving.
[9:10 PM] RawkHawk2010: "Guys, that's a heart."
[9:11 PM] RawkHawk2010: "The drones disappeared. So will we."
[9:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: At least they did a segue.
[9:11 PM] RawkHawk2010: * commercial break*
[9:12 PM] RawkHawk2010: Rachel from Friends is old as hell.
[9:12 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ........
[9:12 PM] RawkHawk2010: Did a single black person appear in Friends?
[9:12 PM] RawkHawk2010: Even as a cameo?
[9:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: http://www.debate.org/opinions/did-friends-ever-strike-you-as-a-racist-type-of-show
[9:13 PM] RawkHawk2010: I can't think of any in Seinfeld aside from Black and White Cookie man.
[9:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Chiles?
[9:14 PM] RawkHawk2010: Turtle.
[9:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We're back on Olympics.
[9:14 PM] RawkHawk2010: I like this.

For turtle-related respect on KoopaTV, click here for the Turtle Day article.

[9:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Turtle referencing Olympics, not Seinfeld.)
[9:15 PM] RawkHawk2010: Turtles symbolize long life.
[9:15 PM] RawkHawk2010: KoopaTV has been around for over four years.
[9:15 PM] RawkHawk2010: Only 96 more to go.
[9:15 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Turtle has multiple colours on their shell.
[9:15 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yellow and pink.
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Maybe the turtle will end up like Bowser's Color Splash shell.
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: EEK
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THE SHELL IS DISINTEGRATING
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: NOOOOOO
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "And eventually the turtle passes through the time tunnel"
[9:16 PM] RawkHawk2010: TIME TUNNEL
[9:16 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is like PMD2.
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: What is this, Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time?
[9:16 PM] RawkHawk2010: But with a Turtle instead of Lapras.
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...
[9:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: (Turtwig)
[9:17 PM] RawkHawk2010: Turtwig flew you around?
[9:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No, I played as Turtwig.
[9:17 PM] RawkHawk2010: Axis of Time
[9:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Your player character went through the time tunnel.
[9:17 PM] RawkHawk2010: This whole thing is Time-themed?
[9:17 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is scary.
[9:17 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yeah...
[9:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: You sure it's TIME to be done with the TIME article?
[9:19 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is unnerving.
[9:20 PM] RawkHawk2010: It reminds me of the end of Bayonetta.
[9:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is a creepy ritual designed to resurrect Calamity Ganon or something.
[9:20 PM] RawkHawk2010: And Super Paper Mario.
[9:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Did the quality just dip?
[9:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Or did it filter or something?
[9:20 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "As they look ahead to the next generation, we look ahead to the next commercial." - NBC
[9:20 PM] RawkHawk2010: That was just scary.
[9:21 PM] RawkHawk2010: Impressive, but without purpose.
[9:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And it was all somehow related to TIME.
[9:21 PM] RawkHawk2010: As in it seemed unconcerned with wasting ours?
[9:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...wot's this?
[9:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: Is this a Korean?
[9:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: What the fuck?
[9:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "The baddest female", K-pop sensation.


PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony CL K-pop silhouette black
CL is trying to be an unlockable character here.
PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony CL The Baddest Female posing
Oh, yeah, you're totally the baddest female, CL.

[9:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is a K-Popper?
[9:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Her name is CL.
[9:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Baddest_Female_(song)
[9:23 PM] RawkHawk2010: "Set them on fire."
[9:23 PM] RawkHawk2010: This isn't the K-Pop I know.
[9:23 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Wikipedia says it takes influence from Dubstep.
[9:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: It seems to take influence from everything bad.
[9:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: She reminds me of Nerdy Star from 50 Tyson's Teach Me How to Diddy.
[9:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: She's saying "nigga chay challa ga"
[9:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: lol
[9:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: omg
[9:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: And she's having everyone in the audience repeat it over and over.
[9:26 PM] RawkHawk2010: I like it better in Korean than English.
[9:27 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is why not being able to understand lyrics is good.
[9:27 PM] RawkHawk2010: "But that Beat Tho" - NBC
[9:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I got the Apple commercial.
[9:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: No Black Knight.
[9:29 PM] RawkHawk2010: Confession:
[9:29 PM] RawkHawk2010: I thought Curling was done while skating until a few days ago.
[9:30 PM] RawkHawk2010: And then realized that didn't make sense.
[9:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: We're back for the Olympic anthem.
[9:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They want us to be standing for it.
[9:31 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Pft, as if I'm going to stand for the Olympic anthem.
[9:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: Is the Olympic anthem made where it can be sung in every language and fit?
[9:32 PM] RawkHawk2010: Wait is he singing in English?
[9:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't believe so.
[9:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: I think it is.
[9:33 PM] RawkHawk2010: He just said "grace and beauty"
[9:35 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is what I mean when I can say I can understand more of the Fire Emblem Heroes theme when sung in Japanese than when sung in English.
[9:36 PM] RawkHawk2010: I can make out the Japanese words in theirs more than the English ones in ours.
[9:36 PM] RawkHawk2010: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thswiDX5vUI
[9:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...........Nah that doesn't make sense.
[9:37 PM] RawkHawk2010: It's true.
[9:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Thomas Bach returns.
[9:37 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Beijing mayor appearing.
[9:38 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: To get the Olympic flag from PyeongChang 2018 to Beijing 2022.
[9:38 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Summer Olympics and Winter Olympics have different flags.
[9:39 PM] RawkHawk2010: This whole thing makes it seem like Thomas Bach rules the world.
[9:40 PM] RawkHawk2010: With him commanding all of the national leaders.
[9:42 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I'm sure he wants that.
[9:43 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "PANDAS!!!!" - Johnny the gay guy
[9:43 PM] RawkHawk2010: Shut up Johnny.
[9:43 PM] RawkHawk2010: Pandas.

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony two panda skaters Beijing 2022
Why did Rawk tell Johnny to shut up for saying pandas, and then he proceeds to say pandas?

[9:43 PM] RawkHawk2010: Pong
[9:43 PM] RawkHawk2010: This music sounds like something from Tales.
[9:44 PM] RawkHawk2010: Or some other JRPG.
[9:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Skating pandas.
[9:44 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Is there a panda pedobear?
[9:45 PM] RawkHawk2010: This whole skit features the best music of the shebang.
[9:46 PM] RawkHawk2010: I like the pandas.
[9:46 PM] RawkHawk2010: They look like they don't have people in them.
[9:46 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Brought to you by Chinese science?
[9:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I like how NBC considers things being done over the Internet as some very novel concept.
[9:48 PM] RawkHawk2010: Are those 8-bit logos?
[9:48 PM] RawkHawk2010: They looked like Megaman sprites.
[9:48 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: WTF
[9:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: AHH
[9:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: THE PANDAS
[9:49 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ARE FLYING WITH ENVELOPES

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony digital mail flying panda
The creepy panda is an e-mail client?

[9:50 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: This is the Chinese equivalent of the video where Cappy possessed Shinzo Abe.
[9:51 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Those pandas are BRAVE, and those pandas work HARD." - Johnny
[9:51 PM] RawkHawk2010: Is this theme a remix of their anthem?
[9:51 PM] RawkHawk2010: it keeps being used
[9:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: LOL
[9:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They said the games were sponsored by companies and gave a sentence after the company name
[9:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: and then just ended with
[9:52 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "and by Google! ............................."
[9:52 PM] RawkHawk2010: lol
[9:52 PM] RawkHawk2010: Here's Prince Harry
[9:53 PM] RawkHawk2010: With his facial hair after he becomes a middle-aged father.
[9:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Due to time constraints some portions of the closing ceremony are not included in our primetime coverage"
[9:55 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Thomas Bach returning, now called "Tomas"
[9:56 PM] Wendy O. Koopa: blah
[9:56 PM] Wendy O. Koopa: dnd
[9:56 PM] RawkHawk2010: hey wendy
[9:56 PM] RawkHawk2010: It's just about to start!
[9:56 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: lol
[9:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "It is my obligation to call the Olympic Winter Games, PyeongChang 2018, closed." - Bach
[9:57 PM] RawkHawk2010: Why does everyone cheer after that?
[9:57 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: He wants the athletes to "assemble four years from now" in Beijing.
[9:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Thank you, and bye bye Korea." And then applause.
[9:58 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now some weird tambourine or something.
[9:58 PM] RawkHawk2010: Cappy's chance.
[9:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: LOL
[9:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "And now the next part of this show... XO." - Gannon
[9:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: CARS
[9:59 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Vehicle K-Pop?
[9:59 PM] RawkHawk2010: Not complaining.
[10:00 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "K-Pop is a global sensation... K-Pop standing for 'Popular Korean Music'... but now it's everywhere so it's just POP." - Johnny
[10:00 PM] RawkHawk2010: K-Pop boyband.
[10:00 PM] RawkHawk2010: With different colored hair on every dude.
[10:01 PM] RawkHawk2010: This is better than C L.
[10:01 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: .......I'm not sure...
[10:02 PM] RawkHawk2010: It would be if it cut back on that shitty chorus.
[10:02 PM] RawkHawk2010: Played twice as much as it should.
[10:02 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Rawk, these guys all have black hair.

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony XO boy band
Look, these guys obviously have hair colours in common. They don't all have black hair, but...

[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: They didn't.
[10:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "do you love do you love do you love me?" but in Engrish.
[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: They don't now.
[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: Look at them.
[10:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: There's one blonde.
[10:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But there's like 9 of them and six have black hair.
[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: One red.
[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: One brown.
[10:03 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: *eight
[10:03 PM] RawkHawk2010: At first they only showed five dudes and they all had different.
[10:04 PM] RawkHawk2010: Can they bring the Panda music back?
[10:05 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "But most importantly, the AMERICAN athletes enjoying the show!" - NBC
[10:05 PM] RawkHawk2010: When is NBC gonna drop the American exceptionalism?
[10:06 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I thought they'd drop it out of RESISTANCE to Trump.
[10:06 PM] RawkHawk2010: Yeah.
[10:06 PM] RawkHawk2010: I think it'd be hilarious if in 2020 they focus on the Americans as little as impossible.
[10:07 PM] RawkHawk2010: And cover them begrudgingly.(edited)
[10:07 PM] RawkHawk2010: Or just flat-out insult them.
[10:08 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They got a giant box on stage and opened it to reveal a snow globe.
[10:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: I don't know what the hell is going on.
[10:09 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But not in an "this is amazing way".
[10:09 PM] RawkHawk2010: What was the point of the Olympics being declared over if it really isn't?
[10:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "The Olympic Games will be extinguished by...snowflakes." - Johnny
[10:10 PM] RawkHawk2010: Poetic?
[10:10 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Funny, because he's a snowflake.
[10:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "And so it ends. ...Is that a tear?" - Gannon
[10:11 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The Olympic flame got extinguished.
[10:11 PM] RawkHawk2010: Wait is that guy actually named Gannon?
[10:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yes.
[10:13 PM] RawkHawk2010: All this time I thought you were memeing.
[10:13 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Terry Gannon.
[10:13 PM] RawkHawk2010: And I was about to call you Gannon Banned.
[10:13 PM] RawkHawk2010: brb
[10:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Back.
[10:14 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: The FINAL portion.
[10:15 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: With a Dutch DJ.
[10:16 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They're interviewing athletes.
[10:18 PM] RawkHawk2010: back
[10:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Now they're interviewing the commentators.

PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics Closing Ceremony NBC commentators TerryGannon Tara Lipinski Johnny Weir
Once again, it's Terry Gannon, Tara Lipinski, and Johnny Weir.

[10:18 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Johnny's favourite part was the Pandas.
[10:19 PM] RawkHawk2010: I agree.
[10:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Copyright NBC.
[10:21 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: GOOMBA MAN RETURNS.
[10:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: lol
[10:22 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Saying the political future is uncertain.
[10:22 PM] RawkHawk2010: They just likened the sister of Kim Jong Un to the daughter of Trump.
[10:23 PM] RawkHawk2010: As equally controversial.
[10:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Perhaps for the last two and a half weeks, the Olympics has given a reason for people to smile."
[10:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: ...nah, not really, no one cared.
[10:24 PM] RawkHawk2010: lol
[10:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Goomba Man trying to make this a  "faith in humanity" moment.
[10:24 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "I'm Mike Torego"?
[10:25 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "Tirico"
[10:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: http://img1.ak.crunchyroll.com/i/spire4/eb8084f8230108f487402956e9984f1c1384463925_full.jpg
[10:25 PM] RawkHawk2010: Did they just start a rerun?
[10:26 PM] RawkHawk2010: Or is this an epilogue?
[10:27 PM] RawkHawk2010: https://twitter.com/haewoosos/status/967282907839578112
[10:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: A recap.
[10:28 PM] RawkHawk2010: So it's over?
[10:28 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Yes.
[10:29 PM] RawkHawk2010: Well that's that.
[10:29 PM] RawkHawk2010: Wasn't terrible.
[10:29 PM] RawkHawk2010: I liked the Pandas.
[10:29 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: Definitely wasn't as good as the Opening.
[10:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: They still have commercials.
[10:30 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: But I'm not sure what's supposed to happen now.
[10:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: "COVERAGE HAS CONCLUDED"
[10:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: kay.
[10:32 PM] Ludwig Von Koopa: So has this log.



What did you think of this year's Olympics Closing Ceremony? How did it compare to the one from Rio 2016? ...Where was Cappy in all of this? Was there any value-added at all in KoopaTV covering the Olympics this year? Let KoopaTV know in the comments section.

4 comments :

  1. Gannon, Goomba Man, and Cappy were all featured in the closing ceremony yet nothing too crazy happened, at least on air. I can only imagine what chaos ensued once the cameras stopped filming.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Or stuff that happened that NBC chose not to air on primetime...

      Delete
  2. Judging from your reactions, I'm glad I overslept. It sounds like something I'd be glad to miss, especially with the commercial breaks.

    Although, just between you, me, and the comments, I find Ivanka to be the best of the Presidential Family. Granted, that's not saying much, since I firmly believe they aren't doing their best representing our country, but it's a slimmer of hope, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wot about Preston from the State of the Union 2018?

      Yeah, Rio's was a must-watch. This one definitely wasn't. And hey, there were more commercial breaks than actual show.

      Delete

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