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Wednesday, August 23, 2017

The Wonderful 1237 Strategy Guides: Jim Gilmore

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's time for Jim Gilmore to prove himself. GILMENTUM!

Last, but far from least, is Jim Gilmore. Why is this article about Jim Gilmore? Well, this is the very last strategy guide for KoopaTV's browser-based Flash game The Wonderful 1237! The Wonderful 1237 features seventeen unique minigames, all from each of the seventeen Republican presidential candidates you will be competing with should you play the game.

If you want to see a collection of these strategy guides, click this detailed article about The Wonderful 1237's minigames. As I've already said multiple times now, this one is about Jim Gilmore, who is most notable for being the governor of Virginia between 1998 and 2002. Jim Gilmore was also the Chairman of the Republican National Committee, a board member of the National Rifle Association, one of the worstSenate candidates in the state of Virginia in modern history, and also an Attorney General. Jim Gilmore happens to be the strongest opposing candidate in the game, and will likely be stronger than your own candidate if you never create negative advertisements against him. Jim Gilmore has a lack of weaknesses, with equal stat opportunities across the board. His one weakness is that he might get RNG-screwed, since he isn't guaranteed stat growth. In real life, of course, Jim Gilmore only got 12 votes in Iowa, out of over 186,000 votes cast. Mr. Gilmore explained that by claiming he wasn't even campaigning in Iowa, but he was really trying in New Hampshire. He earned 133 votes, out of over 285,000 cast. Jim Gilmore then suspended his campaign.

Help Jim Gilmore out by learning about him in The Wonderful 1237, and play his minigame at the bottom of this article!

Candidate Stats

Base stats and growth:
Beauty: 0 + (0–5)
Cool: 0 + (0–5)
Cute: 1 + (0–5)
Smart: 0 + (0–5)
Tough: 0 + (0–5)

Average untouched stats after 14 rounds:
Beauty: 35
Cool: 35
Cute: 36
Smart: 35
Tough: 35

Average likelihood of surviving Iowa if untouched:
Ultra likely. (Jim Gilmore will have 15 delegates on average; need 11 to clear.)
The Wonderful 1237 Versus Jim Gilmore endorsement minigame fight screen
“Versus... JIM Gilmoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooore! Fight.”


Basic Information

Jim Gilmore's Break-Out!!
Break all of the blocks on the screen.
Approximate Time to Play:
About 30 seconds.
The left and right arrow keys to move.


Detailed Description:
After having an elaborate title screen sequence (Jim Gilmore is the only candidate in The Wonderful 1237 to have his own title screen), Jim Gilmore is confronted with 14 blocks: 6 1% blocks, 3 2% blocks, 2 3% blocks, and 3 Gilmentum blocks. Jim Gilmore is presented with a ball, and he must keep hitting the ball with his chain in order to break all of the blocks. If a Gilmentum block is hit, then the ball moves faster. The ball will keep plowing through multiple blocks (and make them disappear) if there are multiple blocks bunched up. However, if the ball collides into a block that is by itself, the block will disappear and the ball will change its direction.
The score is calculated by giving 1 point for each 1% block, 2 points for each 2% block, 3 points for each 3% block, and 2 points for each Gilmentum block cleared. Then, those are added up and multiplied by 100, and then divided by 24.
Optimal Tactics:
As with any breakout variant, your number one priority is to maintain survival by always trying to keep the ball up. Where the ball actually goes after that is secondary, especially since you are not scored based on timing or number of hits you need to do. The actual hitbox is Jim Gilmore's chain, as opposed to his head or shoulders, so be sure to take that into account when positioning Mr. Gilmore.
The placements of all of the blocks are the same in every game, with the exception of the Gilmentum blocks. The ball also moves in semi-random (within a certain band) directions when being hit, and spawns going in a random direction. This is done because I can't bother programming a proper math/physics engine for correct angles.
The Wonderful 1237 Jim Gilmore's Break-Out!! gilmentum
In this run of the game, a Gilmentum block spawns right on the ball's starting point, causing immediate Gilmentum!

Other Trivia

Skill(s) Tested:
The ability to expect the unexpected.
There are so many sources of inspiration for this. First, watch this Jim Gilmore ad, which is one of the very few marketing efforts of the entire Jim Gilmore campaign, for the debate right before the Iowa caucus which KoopaTV covered here:

I figured I wanted to do something with Jim Gilmore's chain. Originally, I envisioned Jim Gilmore swinging around on a central chain (like a minigame from Donkey Kong Country) collecting items, but it turns out that I didn't know how to program that.
Instead, I made a Breakout clone, but called it Jim Gilmore's Break-Out!!, with Gilmore's chain being what he uses to bounce the ball back. The ball, of course, being his campaign logo. The blocks to break are marked by percentages, referencing poll numbers. The idea was for Jim Gilmore to “break out” from the very bottom of the Republican pack and become an actual contender.
The Wonderful 1237 Jim Gilmore's Break-Out!! title screen KoopaTV Punch-Out!!
Having named the game after Punch-Out!!, I got to use the image of Jim Gilmore punching from his ad.
Gilmentum” (alternatively known as Gilmomentum) refers to a hashtag on Twitter for ironic(?) supporters of Jim Gilmore, and Jim Gilmore himself appreciated posts with the hashtag.
The inspiration for Jim Gilmore actually being a threat in the game is the idea that it is NOT supposed to be an exact representation of real life! Plus, I really do think Jim Gilmore deserved better than what really happened.

Play The Minigame Here!

Did you like what you played? The full game of The Wonderful 1237 has 16 other amazing minigames, along with an entire campaign simulation component! Play it for free right on KoopaTV! Ludwig hopes that this article gets more views than Jim Gilmore got votes. This was the last strategy guide. There are no more candidates. Wonderful Wednesday is not over, however. There's still a few more very exciting things left to cover about the game, so stay tuned!

Click here for the previous strategy guide. 
Ludwig believes that this breakout game is better than Justin Trudeau's.


  1. The Gilmentum must have been running close to empty before it even took off. Also, that ad is trying way too hard to appeal to a base that is not even old enough to vote yet.

    1. ...Well, it appealed to ME. One of the best ads of 2015–2016!


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