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Wednesday, June 3, 2020

Not All Cops Are Bad. This One Stomped on Mario!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - ...Well, he might be bad in any other instance of his job that we don't get to see on camera.

Here is a Koopa's first experience with the police force on an Earth country, specifically the United States of America. It's not pleasant:

Super Mario Bros. Super Show Flatbush Koopa Troopa cops police chase bridge
Three Koopa Troopas being chased by four (WHITE) cops, just for being green-skinned.
(Or at least, that's what it seems like. No one asked them why. Too busy running.)

We're definitely not friends of your brutal police force. I'm of the opinion that you Americans have a strong Second Amendment to protect yourselves from your police, which otherwise have a monopoly on force, which tends to be quite corrupting for humans. (That doesn't apply to the benevolent monarchy of Koopa Kingdom, which has no documented cases of law enforcement brutality on its own citizens.)

The police, after all, have no obligation to actually protect you or your property. That's up to you.

With the police being of little use to anyone but themselves (and they get to survive by the force of corrupt unions and their donations to Democrats), it was astonishing to see, on footage, at least one cop do a good thing:

Nintendo New York store cops police Mario plush riot looting Black Lives Matter Antifa
Here's a freeze frame of the relevant moment.
Underneath the hatless bald cop's boots is... MARIO! How ironic.

Some looters/rioters/meanies were breaking into Nintendo's New York City store. They went through the window since the door was locked. Five police officers were in pursuit—perhaps the same ones who chased the Koopa Troopas years ago (plus one). Two to three remained at the store, while I assume the other two to three chased after the fleeing looters. It's unclear if they actually looted anything.

Somehow, a small Mario jumped out of the store with the looters—obviously a part of their group and up to no good. However, it looks like he fell on his way out. Must've been from Super Smash Bros. Brawl and tripped. And then the cops came, and one of them STOMPED on that plumber like he's stomped on us so many times before. ...And I guess he's either dead or in custody or something, but either way, he won't be looting anyone else.

However, having said all that, I know better than to suddenly change my mind about your police forces. This one cop LAID DOWN THE LAW on a diminutive form of Mario. But there are still lots of other kinds of Mario out there, and their number is actually growing. And there are still lots of other cops out there that are quite prone to corrupt mean-ness. In fact, it's more than possible this cop is just mean and brutal to EVERYONE, ranging from Koopas to Mario, and he's still a bad cop.

Still, if you're a member of the police, it'd be nice for more of you to be decent individuals. You're free and welcome to read and participate with KoopaTV and learn some lessons while expanding your mind. And if you don't like the police, you're welcome as well.


KoopaTV is a welcoming place. Just don't expect a censored comments section, because that would actually be very unwelcoming. Ludwig has more to say on riots and lootings and protests, so look forward to those coming articles. But reporting on Mario is an important thing that comes first on KoopaTV. What do you feel about your cops? Are they as brutal as Ludwig believes? By the way, those Koopa Troopas did manage to evade the police.


The police in Brazil were pretty bad, too.
A recent Police Chief in Los Angeles was a murderer, you know.
You're asked to ignore this article portraying Ludwig's feelings towards female cops.
As for the reason for the riots and looting? There's an article on that, but Ludwig is worried about social distancing.

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