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Monday, February 20, 2017

Celebrate Presidents Day by Playing The Wonderful 1237!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - It's exactly the game for the occasion.

Isn't today nice? It's “President’s Day”, ”Presidents’ Day”, “George Washington’s Birthday”, or maybe even “Presidents Day”. ...Depends on where you are. 

Today is supposed to celebrate either George Washington, or any and/or every president of the United States. No one really knows for sure — but that doesn't stop many jurisdictions from having the day off. Great! Long weekends are fantastic. No matter how you look at it, today is about celebrating some kind of successful American winner.

Either way, today is not an appreciation day for non-presidents of the United States. (Sorry, Tatsumi Kimishima.) But if there is a current president of the United States that you do not like, and you don't want to honour him, what will you do? Will you scream NOT MY PRESIDENT out in the streets in protest? Perhaps you would rather scream over Twitter?

Well, if you really want to stay indoors today and feel passive-aggressive towards President Donald J. Trump, wishing that the Republican Party picked someone else to begin with, then KoopaTV has the videogame for you. It's called The Wonderful 1237, and you can play it on your Flash-enabled browser right here on KoopaTV!

The Wonderful 1237 takes place during the Republican primary season, mere weeks before the first voting occurs in Iowa. Not pleased by the existing seventeen Republican candidates, your player character throws himself into the already-massive scuffle. Bring your fledgling no-name campaign out of obscurity, and have America crown you the winner of the Republican presidential primaries in this parody strategy game!

The Wonderful 1237 Sergei Goldwitz Bravura Blaze dialogue you're el presidente what's your name
El Presidente is a bit too enthusiastic considering you've literally just announced your candidacy.

There's an awesome advertisement video that goes along with it that's only 30 seconds long, watchable here.

Obviously, being a presidential nominee doesn't entitle you to appreciation on Presidents Day, or whatever the hell it's called. Most presidential nominees are losers: There's always more people who are nominated and don't become the president than people who are nominated and succeed. Still, at least they beat party nominees, which is the stage in the process that The Wonderful 1237 deals with.

With enough hard work, observation, and cunning, you can change the course of history in The Wonderful 1237. Or ultimately end up as a footnote — The Wonderful 1237 ends at the end of the Republican nominating season. It doesn't go an inch past that. (We ran out of memory space, and... Capture the Confederate Flag implies that Hillary Clinton would end up winning.)

Still, if you don't like this current timeline, you don't need to go an inch past the Republican primaries ending to change it.

Personally, I'm not celebrating anything, because I don't celebrate presidents of the United States. I celebrate... King Bowser Koopa of Koopa Kingdom! ...And I do so every day of the year. While no Koopas are in the game, KoopaTV staffer Roxy is, so there's some connection there.


After weeks of waiting, KoopaTV will begin its Wonderful Wednesday series starting this Wednesday, for articles dedicated to in-depth discussion of The Wonderful 1237! Don't miss them. For more relating to The Wonderful 1237, just play the game already.


The first Wonderful Wednesday article is here, about the game that inspired The Wonderful 1237.

6 comments :

  1. I get the entire week off from school for Presidents' Week, so that's nice.

    I already went to and will be able to go on some nice outings. On Sunday, my family and I went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium and even saw some squid like Girafarig a few months back.

    And this Saturday, I'll be going to the San Francisco Nintendo Switch preview event.

    So, even though both activities are on weekends, I don't have to worry about homework or anything while going to them, always a good thing.

    Wonderful Wednesday! I won't miss it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So what I got out of this was “I get a whole week off, ha ha ha.”

      Oh! So you went to the same aquarium that Girafarig did! Seems to be a popular place among KoopaTV readers.

      Let us know how the Nintendo Switch preview goes for you! (Might even be guest article worthy if you actually get your hands on it!)

      Delete
    2. That's great that you saw the squids. Finding aquariums with live squid is very hard to do because they are very high maintenance for their lifespans and most aquariums don't want to bother with them.

      Delete
    3. My replying capabilities fail me once again. Sorry o_o

      Delete
  2. "Whole week off, ha ha ha"

    Yes, essentially :P

    I'll be sure to write up some of my impressions of the Switch event. Whether in the comments of a related article or otherwise. (I'm so excited!)

    Girafarig, right. It was a nice opportunity, among seeing all the other sea life too, of course. Here's a picture of my squidy friends (no identifying elements that prove I took the picture, unfortunately, but I did)

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    Replies
    1. My husband and I have not focused on taking pics of ourselves at all and only took pics of everything else. The best is when I got in two videos. One of the videos was when my husband filmed me waving Squid Sister plushies around. How am I supposed to explain why I am waving around plushies in front of squids to people who do not really understand this?

      Delete

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