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Monday, March 6, 2017

Console Launch? On a School Day? It’s More Likely Than You Think!

By LITTLE FRUINI - Now you're learning with power!

The Nintendo Switch launch has been anticipated for a very long time, ever since the existence of the NX, codename for the Switch, has been revealed. People have created an NX Bot, bugged Zelda Williams, and the formerly-known /r/NintendoNX subreddit had gone full on haywire before the reveal (there were tons of Tomorrow posts over there)!

Which is why, as an enthusiastic Nintendo fan, it HURTS that I had to actually WORK on Friday instead of being enclosed in a house filled with adventure… and isolation. It hurts in the same way when Nintendo switched the Super Bowl game (pun ever-so intentional)!

March 2017 calendar free student days high school Nintendo Switch release fake
Here is a calendar of a student’s March schedule. The red hexagons indicate free student days.
This poor soul thought that the Switch would release on March 10. If only he knew the truth…

Now, there’s a new problem: Getting the Nintendo Switch itself.

One does not simply walk into a store and buy a Nintendo Switch. Actual effort must be involved. My Nintendo Switch was a collaborative effort: I called GameStop every thirty-minutes, and once they say the magic words, “Reservations are open,” I call my father, and he sets up a preorder. How did I convince a dad who hardly plays video games to set up an order for said video games? Luckily, I said, “Make this my third Christmas present from you.” He gifted me the ability to retrieve the reservation, while I paid for it.

Nintendo Switch Deposits for Pre-Orders slip receipt Gray 299.99
Mmm... Look at those delicious numbers.

Other gamers aren’t so lucky. Some companies immediately charge your card, bank, or PayPal account after your order, and then give you an email saying, “Your preorder has been cancelled.” Now the student that sacrificed one “Absent” on his record now has to press Reload during school hours, and that’s IF the student got an iPad from the school!

The month of February for the Nintendo Switch is more like a calm-before-the-storm scenario. There have been some instances of rain (this is all figurative), such as Best Buy’s preorder session they held online. However, things begin getting serious in March.

Student's Guide acquiring Nintendo Switch Plan Flexible times
This is my brilliant switch-proof plan!

According to my plan, March 2nd should be entirely dedicated to sleeping and preparing. “Prepare” depends on the individual, but the overall concept should be the same: to get ready for the Nintendo Switch. The schedule proceeds as standard there, hence the break after each “Switch!”. The return home would occur in March 3rd, the launch day, on 10 PM, and the NO SLEEP portion begins! This is the part where one plays Zelda on HOUR’S END, and the best part of the schedule.

Unfortunately, things may not go to plan, and this is where the ever-so-standard Plan B and Plan C comes into play. In these plans, you are no longer a Day Oner, but per GameStop’s rules, you have 48 hours to retrieve your item. The last time one can pick up their item is March 4th at 11:59 PM (theoretically speaking), and after, the Nintendo Switch is now up for boughts! In this plan, you have from 8 to 10 PM to retrieve your item. For the earliest potential retrieval of the Nintendo Switch, wake up at 9 AM, eat breakfast, drive the car, and have everything to prove your identity by 10 AM. It varies by individual, hence the flexible student guide! Oh, and make sure to organize your time, especially as a school student.

As a student, you need to calculate the time, run the probability of failure, and understand the financial economics in order to raise enough money for the Nintendo Switch, be prepared for the retrieval of the Nintendo Switch, and have time to spare for The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild for the Nintendo Switch. School COULD help you with video games and one’s hobbies. 

Student planner assignment notebook This Week's Goals Get Nintendo Switch
Thanks for joining me in this lesson of getting SCHOOLED on a student’s attempt for the retrieval of the Nintendo Switch.
(Don't ignore the vocabulary word: hygiene!)

Kids, remember to stay in school and enjoy your hobbies while your parents let you. As a maturing teenager, I appreciate your efforts in reading this article! I’ll reply to the comments telling y’all how well my plans went. I am a frequent reader (not much of a commenter) of KoopaTV, and suggested this article once rumors of Mother 3 arriving became present. If you too want to be cautious of bad sources, educate yourself with this handy-dandy guide!

Little Fruini has written for KoopaTV before, about Undertale. He had different controllers then.
He also managed to comment enough to have won Round 12 of the KoopaTV Loyalty Rewards Program, in part because he wrote and submitted this article while it was still February (and pre-launch).
After buying a Nintendo Switch, Little Fruini has been corrupted by Super Mario Odyssey.


  1. That is some dedication. Besides taking classes online, I have also joined several online survey sites so that I will not have to take out of my savings to buy the Switch. I'm planning to get a new part-time job soon once I get my license, but I still plan on using the extra income as much as possible to purchase non-necessities.

    1. That's a very... inefficient way to get money. <_<


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