Ring Fit Adventure Fitness Log Week 31: Solar Plexia Cries; So Does My Backside

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I visit my chiropractor for the first time in 2021!

Welcome back to another KoopaTV Fitness Friday! I want to be in better physical shape, so I'm playing Ring Fit Adventure for Nintendo Switch and doing some other things to achieve that goal. Throughout this series of articles, you might get to know me a bit differently than you usually would across other KoopaTV articles.

Last week, I cleared World 30, which featured the master of legs, Allegra. This week, I'll be dealing with the master of abs, Abdonis.

This week, I increased the difficulty level to 29 (from 28—the difference notably brings the number of Chair Pose and Boat Pose repetitions from 12 to 14), and I'm in World 31: Extra Fitness Lv. 204. This is a return to the setting of World 8: Tears of Solar Plexia, with Solar Plexia being a deity, pretty much, that is crying and causing world-wide rain due to her powers being stolen. At first, it was Dragaux that took them, but then we took it from Dragaux and Ring never gave it back, since her powers let us double jump starting in World 9. ...So she's still crying even now, hence the first level, Gutterflow Temple, being filled with water.

Ring is a jerk.

The “Reimagined” Pokémon Brilliant Diamond/Shining Pearl Imply Worse Game Design

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - You all are so easily... swept up in TRAILERS.

Just in case you forgot, I already wrote last week that I'm happy that Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Pokémon Shining Pearl are, according to the marketing, “faithful” to the original Pokémon Diamond and Pokémon Pearl games, because that's what I've always wanted whenever people were clamouring for Sinnoh remakes for the past five or more years. This includes the art style, which is being treated very unfairly by Pokémon fans, insulting it with vague terms like “it looks like a mobile game!” What does that even mean? I'm the first one to be out there broadly insulting mobile gaming, but it's not on the basis of graphics. They must not have liked the Sinnoh games’ looks to begin with. Or they're like me and have a bias against 3D models, which... alright.

But then they shouldn't like this “reimagined” trailer that digital artist millenniumloops conjured up a couple of days ago, which has apparently gone viral because multiple media outlets are writing articles about it—with GameSpot outright declaring the graphics are “improved.” The artist has described the trailer as “the way I wanted the [Sinnoh remakes] to be.” Which means they ain't happy with the way the games are turning out:

Lots of comments (and media outlets) are very supportive of this artist's trailer they made in a week, and there's nothing wrong with people being supportive and not toxic.

But there's a lot of things wrong if you think this would be a better game, based on this trailer, than the quality of Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Pokémon Shining Pearl as games based on their trailer. “Improved graphics” (which is totally subjective and I don't agree with it!) have gameplay consequences.

Four Superior Nintendo Character Day Alternatives to MAR10 Day

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - If KoopaTV is around in March 2022, we'll celebrate these.

I understand that your culture has a common practice of dedicating special days to genocidal evil people—that's why millions of people celebrate April 20 for Adolf Hitler's birthday. (But we won't do that on KoopaTV.) And that's why millions of people are celebrating March 10 in “honour” of Mario. He's done two massive genocides in the span of five weeks (a genocide at the end of January and a genocide at the end of February) at a scale Hitler could only dream of! Yet companies like Nintendo that profit off ethnic cleansing are portraying MAR 10 as something to be widely celebrated, even putting some games on sale for 35% off. (And while Mario Tennis Aces is really fun and has fun tournaments, remember that it also features atrocities like Mario murdering Petey Piranha in a supposedly friendly tennis match.)

The basis of MAR 10 being Mario Day is because, with just a tiny bit of creative reading, you can read MAR10 as MARIO. But why give the Koopa-murdering Mario exclusive glory to that interpretation? Here at KoopaTV, we propose four new celebratory days. ...Since most of them already passed, we'll start acknowledging them in 2022:

Enticing Your Inner Gamer

By ASHLEY HALSEY - A Quick Guide On Finding The Right Genre To Play.

Gaming is a popular activity that people can enjoy on a regular basis. But which gaming genres actually turn you on?

In this article, we’ll explore gaming – why it matters, the hardware, the genres, and the skills in said genres. No matter the genre, there’s always a game for someone to play in the virtual world.

Why Gaming?

Gaming has been seen to affect the psychology of the gamer. Check out these amazing statistics:

Monster Hunter Stories 2 New Info From March 2021 Digital Event

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - A new digital event with a new trailer!

After CAPCOM basically hijacked the Nintendo Direct Mini: Partner Showcase | September 2020 from half a year ago to have a spontaneous Monster Hunter-themed Direct, we've heard a lot more about Monster Hunter Rise releasing this month. But they also announced Monster Hunter Stories 2: Wings of Ruin for Nintendo Switch (and Steam—though it's obvious the Nintendo Switch is the primary console that Monster Hunter Stories 2: Wings of Ruin and Monster Hunter Rise are developed for), and we haven't really heard anything new about it since.

That changed today with the Monster Hunter Digital Event of March 2021, which opened up with a new trailer on Monster Hunter Stories 2, tales of an updated website, and additional product information narrated by Monster Hunter producer Ryozo Tsujimoto. Among the most important updates is a worldwide release date of July 9, 2021—a lot more specific than just later in 2021. ...And sooner than I was thinking.

If you're like me and only care about Monster Hunter Stories 2 and not Monster Hunter Rise, the relevant stuff ends at 7:11, but all Ryozo Tsujimoto goes into are pre-orders, deluxe editions, amiibo, and bonus costumes. I can't say I care about getting amiibo about characters I haven't actually met yet, nor would I care about those characters getting alternate outfits, because, again, I don't really have any opinion on them yet, so I'm neutral on their default outfit versus other outfits. (The protagonist is “fully customisable” in appearance anyway.)

Ring Fit Adventure Fitness Log Week 30: Avoiding Allegra's Killer Workout

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - If I die here, KoopaTV would go down too. I don't think you want that.

In this increasingly dangerous world (filled with multiple genocides in the span of a month), there's a pervasive mantra of “survival of the fittest.” How does one get fit? A big part of it is exercise! And the most fun way to exercise is via Ring Fit Adventure on Nintendo Switch.

Last week, I played through World 29's miniboss infestation on difficulty level 28. This week, I'm playing World 30: Extra Fitness Lv. 198. This is based off World 7: The Forest Runner, and the story there was us chasing Allegra the leg master around the world. Writing this paragraph without actually turning on the game yet and starting World 30, I'm going to assume it's going to be a bit different this time around, plot-wise. To the extent you'd say that Extra Fitness still has a plot. (It doesn't, it's just alternate dialogue.)

Speaking of alternate dialogue, on Sunday, the world opened up with Ring saying this is Allegra's homeland, and he hopes that Allegra and Dashley are getting along. Allegra suddenly appeared to confirm that, yes, she's apologised to Dashley over the bad things she did while under the dark influence, and they're training partners again. Except today (or this week). This'll be all Allegra. Dashley is busy. ...I'm sure she'll appear in a later world and I can remind you all who she is.

Today and the whole week 30.
(Emphasis here on “killer”.)

KoopaTV Live Reacts to Masahiro Sakurai Presenting Pyra/Mythra

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Available tonight!

Recall the announcement of Pyra and Mythra for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate in the Nintendo Direct two weeks ago. Xenoblade Chronicles fans consider that to be the most important news of that Direct! (Koopa Kingdom saw it as an opportunity to get revenge on Shulk.)

This morning, Super Smash Bros. series director Masahiro Sakurai took us to his house to talk about Pyra and Mythra, two Blades from Xenoblade Chronicles 2. They work like Zelda and Sheik from Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, a transformation/swap character with polarising stats.

I'm KoopaTV's local Super Smash Bros. expert, and HeavyLobster is KoopaTV's Xenoblade Chronicles 2 expert, so between us two, we got this all covered with smart, live analysis to Masahiro Sakurai's presentation, embedded directly below:

NEVER AGAIN... Again. Goomba Genocide in Super Mario Bros. 35 "2nd World Count Challenge"

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The murder goal failed, but that's of little solace to the hundreds of millions of dead Goombas.

We at KoopaTV have taken a hard anti-genocide stance. This shouldn't be a brave, out-of-the-ordinary take, but I guess powerful corporations like Nintendo and hundreds of thousands (or millions) of gamers disagree. Look at this official Nintendo press release headline from last week: Take on Goombas in the Super Mario Bros. 35 World Count Challenge! You may also earn My Nintendo Platinum Points. You should read that as, “Murder Goombas because we'll give you useless virtual currency for doing so!” Which is also the exact behaviour we saw from corporations with other Mario-related things like LEGO Super Mario.

You may remember the 1st World Count Challenge from the end of January 2021. The goal for that was aimed at mass regicide of Lord Bowser, but by KoopaTV's estimates, also resulted in the death of a little over 257 million Goombas. We declared NEVER AGAIN to such senseless genocide... and then Nintendo wanted 350 million MORE Goombas to be slaughtered for no reason just a month later. Literally a hundred times worse than the Holocaust, but in a much shorter period of time.

So... what was the result?

Faithful Sinnoh Remakes Were Always My Ask

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I'm content for now.

Last week, the Pokémon fanbase actually got news that many of us have been hoping for for many years now: A return to Sinnoh. There's both a lore-filled prequel, and the highly anticipated Sinnoh remakes, which for now look more like Sinnoh remasters.

I wrote an article almost four years ago with the title, “It's Time For Adventure, Diamond and Pearl!” I claimed that we are “supposed to” get Sinnoh remakes “soon.” Obviously, “soon” didn't happen, and you need to have read “supposed to” as, “well it turns out that stars repeatedly aligning really means absolutely nothing.” Anyway, in that article, I pointed out several things: I wanted Super Contests to remain in the game and preferably be untouched, keep the Battle Frontier, give Arceus a big role and allow Him to catch up to the generations of power creep, and do not completely redesign all of the Sinnoh trainers (for the worse) like they did to Hoenn's humans for Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire.

You can summarise that whole article as, “Keep the game the same, and add additional Arceus content.” And it seems like that's exactly what we're getting, except the Arceus content is apparently its own entire separate videogame. (Pokémon Legends Arceus, which, if it was going to do anything else besides explore Sinnoh lore, I wouldn't care about. It just happens to have exactly the one premise I'm interested in playing through despite me being pretty sure I won't like the gameplay.)

And is that what we're getting according to the limited information we have? Well, so far Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Pokémon Shining Pearl have been marketed as...

KoopaTV's February 2021 Review Newsletter

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - I think KoopaTV is finally banned by China's Great Firewall.

February 2021 saw yet another catastrophic death: Right-wing radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh, who pioneered the whole super-genre of conservative public commentary to the masses. He created a whole new blueprint of one-to-many interaction. Without Rush Limbaugh, the likes of Herman Cain (may Herman Cain also rest in peace) would have never been relevant. And without Herman Cain, KoopaTV wouldn't exist. Basically, our godfather's godfather passed away in February, and that's always a bummer.

Still, Rush Limbaugh produced a very large body of archived work, and his influence over culture has been deeply embedded. Speaking for this website, we don't need him around in order for us to keep functioning. We know what we're doing and how to do it well. And... do it well we shall, as shown in the rest of this newsletter

Top Five Recommended Experiences of February 2021

The most important part of KoopaTV are the experiences published in the form of week-daily articles. All of them are worth your time and emotional investment, but here are the top five from February (which only had about one or two less articles than usual despite being two or three days shorter than normal months):

1. BALAN WONDERWORLD is how you don't make a 3D Platformer (or any other game) — Ludwig tried out the BALAN WONDERWORLD demo on the Nintendo Switch, and it's really bad. He writes how it's everything wrong with 3D platformers.
2. Abandon Ship! Not a Projectile? Excluded from the Ballistic Barrage Event Tourney!? — In certain circumstances, KoopaTV is a fighter of injustice. This article is about the blatant inequality of how Super Smash Bros. Ultimate characterises what is and what is not a projectile.
3. VIDEO of Nintendo Cloning Human Earth Girls?! — This may seem like a minor thing now, but this is Earth-changing stuff. Clones in the human world. ...With technology from (or at least showcased by) a videogame company.
4. Bowser's Shulk-Bash Backslash Backlash — The Koopa reaction to Mythra and Pyra coming to Super Smash Bros. Ultimate... revenge on Shulk!
5. What I Think About the Project TRIANGLE STRATEGY Debut Demo (Survey Q&A) — If you wanted to know about the Project TRIANGLE STRATEGY demo, or its survey, this is the article for you. It's a promising strategy RPG experience!

There's probably something to be said that the month started with a harsh look at a SQUARE ENIX game demo, and ended with a relatively positive look at another SQUARE ENIX game demo.