Turnabout Job Interview, and Lindsey Graham & Adrian Andrews

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Our ability to compare and contrast with current events and Ace Attorney is... unparalleled.

We have been mesmerised by the activities of the United States Senate Judiciary Committee and the confirmation process of Judge Brett Kavanaugh, especially the hearing yesterday featuring him and his accuser, Christine Blasey Ford. To back up, near the start of July, President Donald John Trump nominated Judge Brett Kavanaugh of the United States Court of Appeals for the Washington DC circuit to replace retiring Supreme Court justice Anthony Kennedy's Supreme Court seat — a normally lifetime position. He's extremely qualified, and a conservative Republican. Naturally, the resistance Democrats want to oppose his nomination, since they disagree with his judicial philosophy.

What has followed are a series of increasingly incredible but non-credible accusations of sexual assault and rape from women, going back 36 years ago to Brett Kavanaugh's high school days. Brett Kavanaugh has denied all of them. Christine Blasey Ford was the only one of these accusers that even the desperate Democrats considered credible, and so we have the following case...

Turnabout Job Interview.

Date: September 27, 2018
Defendant: Judge Brett Kavanaugh
Victim: Dr. Christine Blasey Ford
Defence Attorney: Rachel Mitchell, and Senate Republicans
Prosecutor: Senate Democrats
Judge: Senator Chuck Grassley
Allegation: A drunk 17-year old Brett Kavanaugh sexually assaulted a 15-year old Christine Blasey Ford at a house party
Verdict: To be determined

Read on for details.

Nintendo Beat Those MariCAR Inc. Dudes In Court

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - At least this case gets resolved. Unlike some other ones.

Do you remember the MariCAR Inc. case that we covered two and a half months ago? It was this go-kart company on the streets of Japan that posed a threat to Nintendo intellectual property, enough that Nintendo's investors were asking about it.

In the footer of that article, I wrote, “KoopaTV may or may not bother to stay on top of this on-going story for you.” Well, I figure we might as well conclude it. 

MariCAR lost, and their statement is here (in Japanese). Nintendo won, and their statement is here (in Japanese). I don't know Japanese, but the loser thought it was unfair and the winner thought it was good.

Fortunately, Takashi Mochizuki of the Wall Street Journal knows English, so here's the end result of the decision:

Tokyo District Court ordered Mari Mobility Dev., previously MariCar, to pay ¥10 million in compensation and stop using Nintendo-related outfit. The street go-cart company operates services in Japan, and Nintendo was complaining it was damaging its "Mario Kart" franchise.

— Takashi Mochizuki (@mochi_wsj) September 27, 2018

10 million yen is almost $90,000, so that's... not very significant. I don't think their business is going to get bankrupt or anything. Meanwhile, MariCAR's website appears to be unphased and is just as stupid as it was in the first article we wrote. No word if they'll drastically change their name.

There's a significantly more important legal proceeding/not-supposed-to-be-a-trial-but-really-was-one that happened today that captured our collective attention. We'll write about it with effort and depth tomorrow to finish the month, but that takes time to do, so you get a filler article today.

But at least we tied up a loose end. Speaking of the effect on Mario Kart, we still don't know anything about Mario Kart mobile, but that crappy Dragalia Lost mobile trash is released now. That's about as much as I'll write about it.


KoopaTV knows you're not sad about not being able to wear Nintendo costumes for this go-karting business in Japan, so instead, you can comment about... Well, you know, you can go ahead and be creative about it.


Here. Non-filler article with effort and depth about a more important legal proceeding.
MariCAR wasn't done. They appealed up to the Supreme Court of Japan... and they denied the final appeal.

Why KoopaTV Doesn't Talk About Fan-Made Material

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - We're better than that.

KoopaTV has been asked many times (and I've been requested many times) over the years to write about some fan-made meme or fanart that is the talk of the day. And I say no. I'm not going to give examples, but surely you can think of memes that are spawned from the Internet's cesspools that have to do with Koopa Kingdom folks or people that Koopa Kingdom is interested in.

Why doesn't KoopaTV, the official Internet presence of the Royal Koopa Family, wish to comment on those cultural artifacts? The answer is simple: It goes against our core beliefs in truth & levity, as well as the belief that engaging in that kind of commentary does a disservice to the reader.

First of all, KoopaTV already avoids writing articles about rumours or so-called “leaks” because that's just sharing someone else's clickbait and trying to get a piece of it. We don't want to be part of the trend of sites that print that unverified garbage and profit off of it, and then suffer no accountability or consequences when it turns out to be false and made-up. There is enough that's happening to comment on things that are officially occurring.

It's the same philosophy with commenting on fan-made material. (Though you could classify rumours as fan-made material, too.) KoopaTV exists to give you value-add. We don't just go share other people's memes or whatever. What makes us better than anyone else if we resort to that?

Meltan — Fake Ditto-Induced Myth, or...

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Just Meltan.

Since I breathlessly gave coverage to the new Pokémon of the week back in the pre-release era of Pokémon Sun and Pokémon Moon, I must give coverage to the newest-discovered member of the Pokémon biosphere: Meltan. Meltan is the Hex Nut Pokémon. It's really small, the size of a Diglett.

Meltan is a Steel-type Mythical Pokémon, meaning it's an event-exclusive Pokémon that you can't catch outside of the event. You probably won't see it in-game, either. But it'll get a movie.

Speaking of a movie, here's a trailer that The Pokémon Company International released about Meltan, featuring Kanto's Professor Oak, and... Professor Willow from somewhere in Pokémon GO land.

(Professor Oak and Professor Willow have a weird and complicated relationship that I won't try to tangentially describe in detail.)

Ace Attorney at Tokyo Game Show 2018: Dismissable

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - GUILTY of lofty expectations.

Ever since the Ace Attorney franchise failed to appear at E3 2018, despite our expectations, we've been looking for the 2018 Tokyo Game Show for CAPCOM to formally announce the next Ace Attorney game on Nintendo Switch.

And then CAPCOM said this, weeks prior to the Tokyo Game Show taking place this month:

“ファンなら見逃せない『逆転裁判』シリーズの最新情報をお届けします！”

That Google-translates to, “We will deliver up-to-date information on ‘Ace Attorney’ series that fans can not miss!” In other words, unmissable news for Ace Attorney fans. Meaning that people who are already fans of the Ace Attorney series will be very interested in the announcement.

Well, Rawk and I stayed up for 3 AM on Saturday to spectate the Tokyo Game Show panel. The announcement? This (but in Japanese):

Bowser Jr.'s Journey... to ARMS Scrub?

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - He's on a journey, but it's not to anywhere good.

As Alex Hunter's Journey ends after FIFA 19 releases next week, Bowser Jr.'s Journey is apparently just beginning when Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story + Bowser Jr.'s Journey releases next year.

Bowser Jr. is dragging Morton Koopa Jr., Roy Koopa... and KAMEK with him?
Well, at least it's not me on there.

I don't really know what antics Bowser Jr. is doing on his journey... I just know that we're involved. We being the Koopalings. Not that we want to be. I mean, look how Morton feels about being on the boxart:

What's Your Style? Retro vs. Modern Splatfest!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Featuring Nintendo Switch Online.

I'm not really one for wearing clothes. You know, normally. Sometimes, special costumes and outfits are cool (there was a whole Splatfest about that). But normally, Koopas wearing hoodies just look terrible.

This weekend's Splatoon 2 Splatfest asks, “What's your style?”

I'm all about the RETRO style!
Or...
I'm all about the MODERN style!

This Splatfest is wondering what your “aesthetic” is, which is some kind of tumblr concept that I don't understand or appreciate. I just know it's annoying.

On KoopaTV, I not only bash retro gaming by saying that no one cares about NES games, but I regularly bash modern games and their practices. Obviously, I'm just an all-around hater, so I'm not sure what my “style” is.

And then Nintendo shared this official promotional art of Pearl (Team Retro captain) and Marina (Team Modern captain):

Abolish the Borderless White Font

By RAWKHAWK2010 - It's a typeface only a mother could love.

Frankly, I'm sick of it. I'm sick of trying to raise awareness of critical Nintendo Switch issues hoping they'll be fixed by the time the console generation ends, only to be swatted down by fans who won't acknowledge a single flaw with the system such as the Joy-Cons' minus button being totally unpressable. (If it's such a perfect button then where are all the videos demonstrating such? *thinking face emoji*)

The problem detailed in this article isn't an issue with the system per se, but more an issue that plagues the Switch's double-whammy of "best Zelda ever" and "best Mario ever", at least as lauded by many reviewers and fans. The issue in question? A new brand of borderless white font that actively attempts to hide itself from the player.

With The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, it's not...too offensive and is more just the fiend in its larval stage. The game's in-game text, if without stylization (outside of the Shrine names anyway), is at least overlayed on top of translucent shadowy text boxes -- you know, as you'd typically expect from a game with borderless white font. But then you shift your attention to the Memory cutscenes, etc. where Nintendo clearly thinks too much UI would distract from the cinematography. They want the font to be as non-distracting as possible...except that too little distraction means it won't actually be legible.

It's not like this is out in Hebra Mountains. Princess Zelda is the cutscene protagonist and just her clothes are enough to cause trouble.

Failed Trial; or Buy And Then Unsubscribe: The Best Ways To Change Nintendo Switch Online

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - These are the metrics Nintendo will understand.

Now (or after the 7-day trial) you have to pay to play your Nintendo Switch games’ online multiplayer features, on top of the purchase price of the games. We, of course, knew this was coming for a very long time. Let's briefly recall KoopaTV's coverage of Nintendo Switch Online:

• January 12, 2017: During THE Nintendo Switch Presentation, the famous one that introduced the Switch in great detail with its hardware philosophy, they announced in the first five minutes that online play will be a paid service releasing in Fall 2017.
• January 17, 2017: Nintendo's Switch online service page becomes available, where I describe it as less services at a higher cost. I noted Nintendo never promised to establish online infrastructure with this service, and they may just pocket the money.
• June 5, 2017: Nintendo Switch Online is delayed to 2018, and the pricing model of $20 a year is revealed.
• May 10, 2018: Nintendo Switch Online has been announced to launch September 2018, and they now say there will be cloud saves.
• May 15, 2018: Details on the family groups that you can establish to share Nintendo Switch Online with you and seven other people become clear, as you can now create your own groups. KoopaTV made one. Family plans are $35 for a year for the entire group.
• September 13, 2018: It's announced that Nintendo Switch Online will be released on September 18 during a Nintendo Direct, featuring the following trailer:

The Stealth Mode Nintendo Labo: Vehicle Kit Launch

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - They're trying to cover-up the Nintendo Labo's actions. We shine the light of truth.

In the midst of all of the controversies and news in the last week, between the delay of the Nintendo Direct, the controversial Nintendo Direct itself, not to mention the uproar over Nintendo Switch Online (more about that in tomorrow's article), there was a product release that happened on Friday that wasn't just a new version of Splatoon 2.

The Nintendo Labo: Vehicle Kit launched on Friday, now in retail stores everywhere. Not many people seem to be paying attention to that, but we at KoopaTV can't let this moment slip by. 

Not with what we already know about the threat of the Nintendo Labo: Vehicle Kit.