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Wednesday, December 21, 2016

The Nintendo Badge Arcade-Swapdoodle Microtransaction Conspiracy!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - Microtransactions in one application benefit you in another!

Maybe I should've seen this coming. While Nintendo is being bashed by analysts for having its iOS application Super Mario Run be a one-time payment with no microtransactions, it is committing heinous microtransaction actions on its dedicated gaming handheld, the Nintendo 3DS. Between Nintendo Badge Arcade's gambling-esque wagering and dollar-feeding, and basic communication features in Swapdoodle being hidden behind payments, Nintendo has their gaming ecosystems mixed up. Sucking people dry of their money dollars at a time is for mobile, and one-time stuff is for dedicated gaming systems. I thought they would get it right.

This kind of payment system is enough to get me to never touch games. According to my 3DS Activity Log, I haven't played Pokémon Shuffle since September 13, 2015. I haven't played Nintendo Badge Arcade since April 29th, 2016, and I still intend to not open that accursed addictive annoyance again. Meanwhile, I fully intend to keep using Swapdoodle, and I also hope I keep receiving notes from all of y'all. Though, I'm already at 99/300 notes...

Sadly, Nintendo is trying to have Nintendo Badge Arcade and Swapdoodle funnel funds into one another:

Swapdoodle Nintendo Badge Arcade Nikki stickers notes
Spending money in Nintendo Badge Arcade benefits you in Swapdoodle! You can use the badges you win in your doodles!

I've shut off notifications for Nintendo Badge Arcade, but here it is, haunting me. The casino loyalty goons are after me no matter what I do! I DON'T WANT TO BE AN ADDICT. Yet...

Nintendo Badge Arcade Swapdoodle advertisement note new badges
I DIDN'T ASK YOU.

...Yet they insist on trying to drag me back in. Stop! LEAVE ME ALONE!

Unfortunately, there are no resources out there to protect players and those at risk of addiction from being assaulted by these gambling advertisements that bypass opt-in notification settings. I'm also aware that once inside Nintendo Badge Arcade, it advertises anything Nikki is involved in, being Swapdoodle right now.

Compared to the greatness of the original Swapnote, it is clear that Swapdoodle limits your communication abilities AND directly tries to suck money... in exchange for adding a new feature that has you becoming addicted to another application entirely and having more money sucked out that way. It's a very bad deal.

The original business model for Swapnote was the same as Miiverse and StreetPass Mii Plaza prior to its non-free minigames: Enhancing the 3DS's feature set to make it competitively viable, and to offer communication features so you'll be using the 3DS more often. Using it more often leads to wanting to buy more games, and it helps that people frequently are communicating about games. It helps word-of-mouth. It also helps when everything around the communication tool is also an advertisement. I learn about new releases on Nintendo systems by seeing what the latest-added communities are on Miiverse, for instance. Or what the latest puzzle piece set is for Puzzle Swap in StreetPass Mii Plaza.

Now Nintendo is making you pay to SEE and use advertisements. There's something backwards about that. You also need to pay in order to be able to store a sizable archive of said advertisements. That doesn't make sense.

...Now I will impart to you a handy tip: If you haven't paid for a blue pen yet in Swapdoodle, but want to use blue, go to the Notes application on your 3DS and draw using the red/blue/black pens for that. You can save your note as an image to your SD Card, and then you can attach that image to a Swapdoodle note!


Today, December 21, is Nikki's birthday. She's the girl that is the face of the Swap series of applications, and the Arcade Bunny is totally in love with her. No wonder they're collaborating for EVIL! Are you disappointed in Swapdoodle, or do you believe it still has much untapped potential?

8 comments :

  1. Alack! The evils one will undertake for love.

    They did not "make Swapnote great again"! No, no, they reanimated it in a lesser form. Its zombified remains are toddling about in the form of Swapdoodle, wreaking havoc!

    Protect your children, protect your spouses...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I dunno if the Arcade Bunny is motivated more by greed or more by love...

      ...But it's clear that, yeah, it ain't great again.

      Delete
  2. I barely get notes at all because the people I communicated with regularly on Swapnote moved on since its death.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So should I send you more? >_>;

      Yeah, I don't get much either, and Rawk was begging me to just send him anything because his 3DS friends don't use it either, even though they've used Swapnote.

      It doesn't help that half of those, for him, are from NeoGAF!

      Delete
  3. I knew Nikki would one day rise from the ashes and regain her fame, but I never thought she would go as far as to corroborate with the bunny. The furry menace must be blackmailing her. I have a feeling that he knows the real reason why Swapnote was taken down, and it all has to do with a particular note Nikki had once sent. He would not tell anyone her secret as long as she followed one condition- she must include his arcade badges as stickers in her next app. This is the most plausible explanation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. (Sounds like something I need to investigate...)

      So how do YOU know her secret, then?
      ...Are YOU really the bunny?!?!

      Delete
    2. Kody "The Nintendo Aracde" BunnyDecember 22, 2016 at 7:41 PM

      *Cornered music begins playing
      I...I...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
      THUD

      Delete
    3. (You were gonna get full credit for "B" really standing for "Bunny" this whole time, BUT DAT ARACDE.)

      Delete

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