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Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Lindsay Lohan Sues Rockstar!

By LUDWIG VON KOOPA - The rock star she always wished she was?

It is a time of lawsuits lately. The one we'll focus on today is the newly-confirmed lawsuit of Lindsay Lohan vs. Rockstar, the guys behind Grand Theft Auto V. I don't know much about pop-culture: I thought it was spelled "Lindsey". That's how Lindsey Graham's name is spelled. Anyway, take a look at this:

Thanks BBC!
Apparently Ms. Lohan and a "Lacey Jonas" character have a strong resemblance. Really strong. So strong, that Ms. Lohan is suing for creating a character based off her without permission.

It's really clear that I don't like Grand Theft Auto V, and Rockstar by extension. That said, this lawsuit is wholly without merit. Lindsay Lohan, whoever she is, is apparently so egotistical and self-centered that any portrayal of a blonde beach bimbo is in her likeness. Now, for all I know, Rockstar really did intend for this. But from what I can tell, any one of these Hollywood elitist types could replace Ms. Lohan as the plaintiff here. They're all the same. The non-brunette ones anyway.

If you want a really detailed information source about the laws behind this, look here. I recommend doing that, actually.


Here is the character in question. Now for Lindsay Lohan in a similar real-life experience:


Grand Theft Auto V does try to satire a lot of real life things. Lacey Jonas is clearly an amalgamation of several of these famous coastal elitist types, the same way that the women in Choice: Texas aren't based on any one specific person but is a composite character. The fact that Ms. Lohan identifies with the shallow character of Lacey Jonas says a lot about Ms. Lohan's own character. Perhaps she wants attention. That's what these people live for, isn't it? I find it hard to believe any actual damage was done. Rockstar has no comment, and they don't really need one. Even if Rockstar intentionally modeled Lacey after Lindsay, I don't think Rockstar should be punished for that. It's just using a trope! For satire! That's protected activity!

Coming up next on KoopaTV: Discussion of a lawsuit that actually has merit! It's a defamation one, similar in nature to Lohan's claim. Stay tuned.


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Click here for the meritorious lawsuit.
Here is another frivolous lawsuit.
Here is a great lawsuit also against Rockstar for the same game.

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